from penis size to trust,
gary dourdan lets loose

Gary Dourdanís busy these days. With a feature film-PLAYING
GOD, a dramatic comedy starring David Duchovny and
Timothy Huttonóabout to drop, and his band, The Bell Cafť
,taking up all his free time, itís wonder he had time
to sit down with YSB. Wonders will never ceaseÖ.

ysb: After your appearance in Janet Jacksonís ďAgainĒ
video and this yearís steaming cover of Essence [he appeared
bare-chested with three other guys], youíve become really hot.
Whatís it like being a sex symbol?

gary dourdan: Iíve had fears before that it would demean my ability
to be a craftsman and belittle the deeper aspects of who I am. At
the same time, Iím grateful and Iím flattered. But I donít take too
seriously. I could get a scar one day or a fat belly.

ysb:How old are you?

gary dourdan:UhÖ29.

ysb:You hesitatedÖ.

gary dourdan:I imagined for a second that I was a woman
and I thought about being deceitful about my age.

ysb:So youíre saying women are deceitful?

gary dourdan:Oh, most definitely. Menís brains are bigger than
womenís, but women are smarter. Thatís not an opinion; thatís a fact.
And they use that to deceive.

ysb:You sound like someone whoís been deceived.

gary dourdan:Oh, yes. You go through that in relationships when
you travel a lot. And when you deal with women who are beautiful, they
have a lot of insecurities.

ysb:And you donít think men are insecure?

gary dourdan:Not so much about their looks.

ysb:Do you think the fact that a womanís looks can
be manufactured accounts for difference?

gary dourdan:If a woman isnít happy with her breasts,
her thighs, her eye color, her hair, she can do something about
it. The biggest thing that men deal with that makes them very
insecure is penis size and hair loss.

ysb:Penis size I understand, but whatís so traumatic about
thinning hair?

gary dourdan:I never used to think about it or understand
itÖuntil I started losing my own. When men start to lose their
hair, they start to lose their power, the strength of being a man,
their virility. Thatís just a preception of course, but I believe
it to be true.

ysb:What do you do to chill?

gary dourdan:Play the guitar, the flute, listen to Alice Coltrane.

ysb:Tell me about your band?

gary dourdan:We play jazz with a funky beat every Sunday at the
Bell Cafť in New York.

ysb:So are you a musician or an actor?

gary dourdan:Iíd like to say Iím both, but Iím neither.
Iím just a performer.

ysb:Name something about you most people would be surprised to know.

gary dourdan:I was married for four years. It ended two years ago.

ysb:What did you learn from that experience?

gary dourdan:That it would be a long time before I get
married again. It takes a very responsible person to be married.
Itís a lot of hard work.

ysb:Whatís the most sensual gift a man can give a woman?

gary dourdan:Trust. I think trust is really sensual. You can be really
uninhibited and be at your most wild and sensual.

ysb:And receive?

gary dourdan:A nude woman.

Interview by Jacqueline Y. Metcalfe
Article originally appeared in the October 1996 issue of YSB(Young Sisters and Brothers magazine)