I feel incredibly guilty, but then again, I'm somewhat glad. Now I don't have schedule conflicts all over the place, and I can theoretically afford Christmas, too. I'm sure I'll stop feeling guilty as soon as I fully realize how open my schedule has just become.
I'm incredibly regretful that last night was the last Tae Kwon Do club of the season. There will be testing tonight, and we're all going out to Bilbo's on Thursday night, but we won't be back in to work out until after January 8. I will miss it very much. The activity is fascinating, and I love to spar. It's also a really nice group of people, and I'll miss them, too. Of course Forest and I will still play during the downtime, which helps me out a lot, especially on defensive things.
Last night went a lot better. I remembered not to stay on my back foot, and kept my hands closed, which is always a good thing, since it means I won't throw anyone. I actually got a point or two from punches, which is a first for me, and threw some decent reverse rounds and front kicks, aside from my usual crescents and rounds. Next thing I'm going to be working on is chambering everything correctly, and staying loose, and fluid. Forest says I'm still too solid. I also need to remember to use my back leg more. I tend to want to throw everything from the front.
I digress. Last night everyone was relaxed and happy, and we all sat around just chatting and laughing for a while, too. Forest and I had such fun that we didn't want to leave. When we left, it was late, but we didn't care. We went home, and were very snuggly for a long time. I don't know if it's the weather, or that both of us are sickly, but we just seem to be cuddle-starved.
I'm now at that point in my Christmas shopping where I can't remember what I got for people, and haven't decided how much more I should get. It's hard to estimate the right amount of stocking stuffers. I always end up with too many, so they end up getting wrapped and stuck under the tree. That's one of the big problems with shopping in advance. I have gotten gifts and stowed them away, and forgotten all about them. Happily, a review of my list shows me that I'm not all that far off base. I just need to chill out and not go too crazy.
My mother has done something completely unexpected this year. She is usually pretty hard to shop for, because she has everything she wants. The other day, though, she said she had realized she was difficult, so rather than buying anything in the past few weeks, she has put it on a list. A Christmas list!! So even though I already got her something, I am going to get her a couple of things on the list, so maybe she'll make another one next year.
Tomorrow Forest and I are going shopping with his mom, and I will grab something for my sisters, my mom, and get started on fleshing out Kirstin's haul. I also still need to shop for my dad, stepmom, two grandmas, stepsisters, stepbrother, Bill, Kathy, Allyn, and Alex. Forest and I collectively need to get his cousins, grandma, aunts, and a few friends taken care of. It's going to be a busy 11 days. Good thing I have all that new-found free time.
Kirstin changed her mind at the last minute, thank heavens, and is now writing her report on Mexico instead of Russia. This is a good thing, because there's a wealth of information on Mexico and its Christmas traditions on the internet. The food isn't that obscure, and there are even recipes that have been translated into english that don't involve pig appendages. (Ick.) Kathy and I thought it would be funny to use one of the traditional tequila-based recipes, but after much debate we decided that we didn't want to get Kirstin in trouble at school, so we're sticking with a traditional pecan-date pie. Non-threatening, and vegetarian to boot!
People at work have begun to swamp me with Christmas sweets, and I'm doing my best to drink water instead, but man, do they ever know how to make just what I like. I love fudge, and on a platter just 10 feet away from me is enough fudge to feed an army of elves. It smells wonderful. It's really the only food in the world that I will eat whether I'm hungry or not. Most of the time food is just fuel to me. Fudge, however, transcends fuel, and becomes part of me. It reminds me of being a little kid at Christmas time, when my mom would make it, and the whole house would have that sticky-sweet scent all night. I remember my cousins with brown smudges on their faces, and sneaking extra peices when my parents weren't looking.
Poor Forest. He feels terrible. Between the concert and the snuggle-fest on Sunday we went to eat with my parents and Grandma Ruth at Rio Bravo, a new chain restaurant in Okemos. (Actually, the food wasn't bad, but it was pretty pricy, for Mexican.) He really wants to please my parents, and the rest of my family, too, for that matter. He feels like he wasn't much of a conversationalist on Sunday, because he wasn't feeling well, and was doped up on antihistamines. He's sure he didn't make a good impression. I wrote to my mom about it, and she replied (And I quote)
Forest certainly has nothing to apologize for. We thought he was fine company.......no problem! We had a good time!(Yes, my mom is just learning to use email. Don't pick on her punctuation.) Obviously, he's being oversensitive. Then again, I worry about his family's impressions of me, too. I don't dress as fashionably as his mom and siblings, so I fit in fine with Forest and his dad, but I worry that I'm a bit of a frump for everyone else. It also takes me a little getting-to-know time before I'm ready to start picking on someone, so when there's someone new around, I don't participate in the usual verbal pokes and jabs much. It's not that I'm shy, I just am not comfortable picking on someone until I know where the sensitive spots are, so I don't hit them. But I worry that they think I just don't play well with others or something.
Of course I'm sure my silly worries are completely unfounded. After all, the things I worry that they don't like are things that I have in common with Forest, that help make us a good match. His mom made me laugh at breakfast the other day by saying "My God, you really are identical twins." It's uncanny that it's that obvious, but in many ways it's true. Even I have to look pretty hard to see the differences between us.
Okay, Jane in the next cube is now listening to a compilation album of Celine Dion music. For the third time through. I must get out of here. I'm sure I can find some work to do on the other end of town.
