And how, praytell, does he fall head over heels in love with me overnight like that? One day, I was the lowest thing on his priority list, and we had a very relaxed non-relationship that sometimes verged on abusive because he ignored me so much. He pushed me away, and denied my friendship, and shut me out of his feelings. I was convinced that he was ashamed of me.
So now he is smothering me with love, obsession, possessiveness and affection.
I'm inclined to suspect that all of this is happening because he is afraid he will lose me, and because he's still threatened by Forest. He begged and pleaded with me all weekend, and kept it up to such a degree during the week that he and I both missed a day of work in miserable company with each other.
But I stuck with my plan. If he wants me to really be his girlfriend (and more than his girlfriend) he needs to show it to me with some level of constancy for some period of time. I need to learn that I can trust him, and mostly I need to know that his sudden change of attitude cannot be attributed to a case of indigestion or fear.
I have felt bad for hurting him. I'm not the hurting type. But it was necessary. I think I may have finally convinced him that I was serious about needing some time alone when he asked repeatedly that he could move in with me, and I told him no repeatedly. I feel like a cruel, heartless person, but I know I did the right thing.
What a nasty world this is. Someone please call Aaron Spelling and tell him to fire all the writers, because the plot on the soap opera that is my life SUCKS!
