hating every moment...........
[
Bytch]
[
Mother Dearest]
[
Averted Glances]
[
Intentional Ignorence]
[
William Tell]
"Bytch"
A fuck-up. Alone.
At the fault of my own hand.
Drowning in water,
a foot from the land.
Frail and starving,
while holding the meat.
Freezing to death,
never turning up the heat.
Complaining of a migraine,
while banging my head.
Bleeding to death,
with a needle and thread.
Stumbling in the dark,
with my finger on the switch.
Always hurting myself.
Stupid, pathetic, bytch.
"Mother Dearest"
I felt your angry nails dig into my skin.
I cried when you hit me, time and again.
You were everything, all that I had.
I promise, I never meant to be so bad.
After you and Daddy fought, I'd come and kiss your cheek.
Soon after, I would be the one that you beat.
My Mommy. My entire world.
Why would you do this to your little girl?
I'm older now, and I see the truth.
So, why does this gaping wound still hurt?
You laugh with me and try to be my friend.
Long ago, our friendship met it's end.
You left your little girl scared and alone.
Hating every moment in my own home.
"Averted Glances"
You look at me and smile.
We talk and you look into my eyes.
I quickly avert my glance,
Afraid you'll see inside.
I don't want you to see
The tears I cry alone in my bed.
I don't want you to know
About the incessant torture in my head.
Please don't discover
All of the pain lurking inside.
I've tried my best to cover it.
I've tried so hard to make it hide.
Intentional Ignorance
Close your eyes to my hurt.
If you see a scar, be sure to turn your head.
Smile and live your pathetic hypocritic life.
Try your best to ignore that inside I'm dead.
Control and toy with my emotions
With your demeaning and manipulative ways.
Forever I blame you
For my hatred of each and every day.
Every time I look at your face
It stabs and tears, creating another wound.
If I never saw your face again
It would be far too soon.
My anger towards you increases
With every painful thing you put me through.
If, by now, you haven't understood my point,
I'll make a long story short by saying,
"Hey, Bytch, FUCK YOU!"
William Tell
I choke back the vomit
That begins to churn
When I realize what I've become.
My anger and hatred
Festers and burns.
Soon it'll all be gone.
I've had my fill
of the sadnes, the anger, and lies.
I've had enough
Of the pain, the hatred, the shame, and
The forever goodbyes.
I don't know if it's possible
For me to survive through much more.
Every day is more intense.
The pain greater than before.
I place my heart upon my head.
Strike, arrow! I lie dead.
© 2000 B.Smile
