Otis Big Announcement?? (11/99)

Isn't it strange? I can say that Otis is handsome, and I don't feel a need to put a disclaimer, because nobody would think that I was coming on to him merely by complimenting his looks. Of course if it weren't for people like Ted and Tina, you wouldn't have to put a disclaimer either, not even in jest, because everybody would know that you were happily married. In a very small way that illustrates some of the human price of bigotry. But, oh no!They're not bigots. They have gay friends.

Of course I don't understand how they can look these friends in the eye and tell their gay friends that they don't deserve the "right" to marry the person they love. I guess they don't realize that it's impossible to say that gays don't deserve that same basic "right" that heterosexuals have without implying that gays are less human than heterosexuals. I mean, that's not what Ted's really trying to say when he says, "My marriage would have less value if *those people* were allowed to marry," is it?

Of course not. Ted's not a homophobe. Oh no! He just thinks that if you're allowed to marry that it will encourage other people to be gay. I don't understand why he thinks it would be such a horrible thing if more people are gay though. Seeing as how he's not a homophobe, it's not like he would object to people being gay because he finds the whole idea of homosexuality disgusting or anything, because that's what homophobes are like.

Nah, it's just those damn liberals who call you a bigot if you don't think like them, that's it. Ted's not a bigot or a homophobe. He's the real victim here actually, the one whose rights are danger: the liberals are not only trying to devalue his marriage, they want to deny him his "right" to think for himself.

So here we sit and you've got to reassure everyone that you're not coming on to Otis because, if the wrong man ever did think that you were coming on to him, artd-l could be reading about how our Pantomine Archbishop was beaten, burned and left in a dumpster all because he was courteous enough to pay someone a compliment.

Well that's the price we all gotta pay so people don't get the idea that homosexuality is okay, isn't it Ted?

Dr. Charlie

Who's comtemplating the irony of Ted and his elk complaining about the punishment they could face for complimenting the wrong woman on her looks