your always throwing kisses from the sky, well tonight I caught one
Yesterday we got back from hotlanna. We ( Justin mom and myself) left on Friday for North Carolina. Justin and I stayed at a mom?s friend?s house while she and her friend went to a conference. THAT was fun. We stayed in a double wide across from a crack house. No lie. When mom got back, we were off to the beach to visit Daniel at a marines base. ( redneck) we were board at Jacksonville to we went jet skiing and hung out at the beach. That was fun. The next day we were off to Raleigh to see Travis play at the Dave Matthews concert. We were at the hotel when Travis called and said that if we got there in the next 5 minutes he could get us in free. And he did. We got to park in VIP parking and get into there absolutely free. BUT we got there around 4:00 and Travis wasn?t on until 5:45 and the DMB wasn?t on until 8:00. So we sat and waited in the hot hot sun, and listened to Dave warm up. Justin did something absolutely amazing for me and I was astonished. Il a fait l'inconcevable, et je l'aime pour il. When travis went on, people were starting to walk in and buy drinks and stuff. We had his own little stage with the band and they were awesome. People were whistling and dancing, and they sold a lot of T-shirts and CD?s. it was so good. Then the opening band for DMB ( whish sucked, some old honky tonk guy) went on. People were getting so drunk at this point and smoke was everywhere. We got lawn seats so it was nice. When Dave Mathews went on, all the drunks were dancing and freaking out. Mom says ? I smell pot.? which was everywhere. But Justin said he didn?t even have a craving. I?m so proud. LoL. I love him. My other fish was still alive when I got back and it still is!

Well I got back from MA not long ago. Justin greeted me with a dozen roses and a kiss. I was preoccupied with scary thought s of my own (cough::baby::cough) we exchanged gifts and one of mine was a goldfish in a new tropical tank!!! I was so happy, we named him PJ, and got him all these lil friends to play with. Supposedly they last two years in this tank with a water filter, but PJ was a rebel, and DIED in only TWO days. I was so hurt. Why would he dio this to me? We took his lil body back to the store so the water could be tested, but they couldn?t test it bc the dead fish was in the water sample. I just think the girl didn?t want to touch it. So the cause of his death remains unsolved. Justin also surprised me with a special gift. A ring with two thin gold bands joined together by a silver ?J? encrusted with diamonds. Wow. I love it. He new I always wanted diamonds in a gold ring. Dirty bastard. Today we were playing basketball, and he went to dunk the and the entire hoop and rim fell down?..onto his head. It was bleeding all over the place, and he had this huge bump. He was dizzy and had a headache so we took him to the hospital after mom came over and looked at it. But the waiting room was packed, and after they checked his ?vital signs( in other words, make sure hes not already dead) they said it would be a loong wait until he could be seen. Yeah right. We left. And now im home and sleepy. Mom just asked ? so where are you and Justin headed?? ?me-? we?ll probably get maried.? mom- ?Oh.?

at TJ's??? hi bobby. Everyone says hi.

Im at mikes right now, or i guess we are at MIkes. Um yea. And JJ and TJ and we are waiting for Pat so we can go to the mall. The weather sucks up here, so we cant do anything active, like jet ski bc her jet skis are broken. my mouth hurts. i miss my baby.

IN Boston
Haw. SOOOO like totally Im in BOSTON right now. Good band. IM with Jess and Amy and....sigh.....old man River. Hahah Moi DAD. so far, I think they are trying to kill me. As soon as we got out of the airport, Dad almost ran over this Taxi cab. The taxi cab was not pleased. He swerved off the road and then strategically tried to run off my dad, while simutaneously giving him the finger AND laying on the horn. After being in 3 carwrecks, it scared the shit out of me. THEN when i thought relaxation was in store fore the rest of the night, they decide to take me on a bike ride. Through Boston. During rush hour. Im out of shape. I almost died. Then we ate at this place called Bamboo this Thai place and they tried to FEED me until I EXPLODED. Today we went shopping..........ya know what I mean by "shopping". BUT this time i DID buy stuff. Pour ma petit ami. TONIGHT we ( Jess and myslef) are going to see ANCHORMAN. Amy wants to celebrate Bastille Day ( dad says- "what do we care about the fucking french. I want to see Chasing Amy" Amy-"But thats not a french movie. we are going to see Amelie" Dad- ::grunts::) SO we are going to see Amelie. MOI favorit. Well it is time to....be finished. I see Lo on TUESDAY. moi yed.

NO one understands. Its not a feeling. Its not a "thing"...its..its...soumates. I cant call it love, that overused misunderstood word, because not many people my age experience this. Its like, something from the movies. The two people in the entire world that fit together so perfectly, that blend, that melt into each others souls. Its like, we were made in some kind of womb together, and we cant imagine life without each other. Justin and I. I cant talk about it, I cant even write it into words. were like best friends. I mean of course me and Lauren are still best friends, but so are Justin and I. We do things that friends do, like go-cart racing, shoplifting, sports, swimming, singing, family trips, concerts,new house shopping, mattress shopping, driving mini vans, belching, you name it. Then we do intimate things, that are sometimes so fun, and sometimes so beautiful. And its been this way for so long, which is rare for me or him to feel. and we talk of things. We talk of our past. we know everything there is to know. And i love all of it. We talk of our futur. Of college, houses, kids, pets, eveything. we cry. Its amazing, and I'm telling this to my computer, because no one else will understand. I have met the love of my life. Justin will be someone I will tell my grandkids about, even if they are ours.

The sun above is hurting my head
Justin is here. He says hi. We went to a wedding yseterday. It was a Jewish one. Good times. Only that we left during the reception. Lo got back yesterday. around 11:30.....havent really seen her since. Her last official WEEK!! :( I got poison ivy. As well as a ticket. Because Some redneck's trailer got in the way of my car. Fuck trailers.












FUCK TRAILERS!!!

old
Yesterday, Lo took me and Justin out and took pictures of us. They look ?stunning? Ill try to post some asap. Today we sang for the athletic banquet, and just as we started to sing ?stormy Weather? it started to storm. And downpour. Really downpour. Like flash floods. And There I was, without my cellphone, in my red sparkly dress, in the pouring rain, with fogged up glasses, looking in vain for a red Subaru. I was a damsel in distress, but superman I guess didn?t want to get wet or something because my ass was defiantly outside for a while. But all that matters now is that Im in my comfy pjs snug and warm. On a more serious note, I think I figured out why I come off so ?blunt? and ?promiscuous? and ?weird? when it comes to my relationships. I caught myself thinking today as I watched Justin?s car pull away ? Damn, Im starting to really like him. Maybe we should break up.? and then I thought ? WOA! Wait why do I always think these kinds of things? Why do I feel that if I start to really like, even love, somebody, that they will automatically break my heart?? and then??.Kevin. I compare every guy to Kevin. I think that every realtionship will turn out like that one, and that I will have to endure another painful, heart wrenching, drug induced summer. And that?s not the way to be. I should not be scared to love. Yet, there is still slight doubt in my mind. The inevitably will happen. No one, or hardly anyone, ends up marrying some person they dated in high school, and usually couples might not want to be friends if they break up, so there really is no happy ending. As soon as I start dating someone, I think to myself ? I wonder how this will end? so I try in vain not to get to attached to the person by submerging myself in other aspects of life. But even so, I still may fall. One glance, or smile may do it. But it usually happens when I start to think the guy isn?t interested anymore. All he has to do is glance at some short skirt, or talk about how hot some chick is, and I immediately start liking him so much more ( asshole effect) . I think its because I start to want to be in the center of his attention, not some other chick. But then again I start to think the words of Justin B. ? I don?t go into a relationship thinking of how it will end. I just think how good its gonna be.? And I agree?.but wouldn?t that make me naive? Maybe its because I think too much. As Daniel says , ? Its all Drama Kate, its all drama.? God im tired.

OLD
SO?.
Its been a while since I?ve been online. And a lot has happened. First off, last Friday I crossed to the ?other? side. I attended a Lacrosse game!!!! :-o Secondly, on Saturday, we got in a car wreck. Lauren t totaled her mustang??.We were taking turns driving around Earlysville drying off?. ( we were in our bathing suits) and we picked up Liz. While on our way back to Lo?s house ( luckily she was driving) this asshole in a box-on-wheels ( Element) decided to run a stop sign. Lauren ( traveling at a speed of 45 mph) swerves to miss him, but inevitably, the inevitably happens. We ?t-boned? right into him and landed in a ditch. Since I was laying down asleep in the back ( with my seatbelt on) I went soaring, but hit Lauren?s seat and banged my leg on liz?s seat. Lo?s head hit the air bag and then her seat. Liz?s hand was hanging outside so it got messed up. Long story short, mom got there before the ambulance could be called so she took me to the hospital. ( Justin was waiting there) with a concussion and some seat belt injuries and horror stories from the Texas chainsaw massacre stuck in Moi YED. I got a cat scan and some x-rays, and slept at home for the night?..with Justin J Lo got some head x-rays, and Liz got a wrap thing. We are still sore as hell, and lo has a gargoyle bump. Thirdly, Justin got to ?take care of me? the next day?.and?well?take care of me her did. ;-) Lo and I went car shopping for like 5 minutes and the decided we were hungry and got some food. Justin came over Tuesday morning and um?.?took care of me?. and now im ready for SOLs

long time, no write
Well, Cabaret is said and done....and it was...by far....the best show AHS has EVER out on. Even if i was a prostitue. Eh. Im not going to write much journals anymore...I am going to try to get back to poems. Life is confusing....and trying to write it all out is stressful. SO yes, from now on free verse poems.




so much drama.//chilll youuurr baalllsss people