The
World According to Rover XXXIIJune 2008
Carrying a thick stack of papers bound in heavy brown cardstock, Rover rolled through the door to John’s office, pausing next to the desk, then extended his pincers, offering the bundle. Once the colonel had taken it, the cart patted his thigh, reversed directions, and rolled out again, zipping toward Rodney’s lab once he was in the hallway.
"You gave it to him?" Rodney asked, stroking the cart’s sensor array, the move earning him a series of flashing lights. "Good boy. Now stay here and protect me if he decides he wants to kill me."
Holding the papers, John had stared after Rover in bewilderment until the cart disappeared, and then he half frowned, half smiled as he opened it, only to stop dead when he read the title.
"He didn’t!" John leaped to his feet, the folder clutched in his hand, and nearly ran to Rodney’s lab, the other man looking up as he entered, a bright smile on his face.
"Ahh, Colonel, I take it you read my paper? What did you think of it?"
"I think you are absolutely insane, and I don’t believe you graphed how many licks it takes to make me come!"
Radek raised his head to gawk at them and then burst into laughter, actually slipping off his bench to the floor.
"Oh, grow up already," Rodney snapped, kicking at the other man as he passed him by, Rover reaching down to poke at Radek as he followed close behind. "And I told you I was working on this!"
"I didn’t think you were serious!" John moved out of the way as Reza zipped past to push Rover away from Radek.
"And why is that?" Rodney asked, his eyebrows rising.
"Because it’s bizarre," John said, finally relaxing and laughing.
"Pardon me?" Rodney sniffed. "Bizarre? I didn’t hear you complaining about the study that went into it."
"I wasn’t aware our sex life was a study!"
Rodney’s eyes narrowed slightly, and he grabbed the document. "Fine, forget I did it then; I’ll shred it, and you’ll never hear about it again."
"Hey, that’s mine!" John snatched it back, holding it protectively to his chest. "I don’t believe you actually counted," he said with a wry chuckle. "I know I couldn’t concentrate on that if I was blowing you."
"I multi-task exceptionally well," Rodney sniffed. "And Rover helped me." The last was added in a mutter, which John still heard, making him gape at Rodney.
"I’m surprised he didn’t pinch you for the suggestion," he finally said.
"He likes helping me," Rodney shrugged. "And it wasn’t as if I was asking him to help!"
"I would have pinched you if you had!" John finally burst into laughter, pulling Rodney close. "You really are a mad scientist."
Rodney looked over at Radek, who was collapsed against his lab bench, laughing helplessly. "One word of this outside to anyone and I’ll prove just how mad I can be."
Radek waved a hand, laughing too hard to speak.
"Only in Atlantis," John sighed, shaking his head and still grinning while Rover spun in a circle, apparently proud of his part in the research.
"Oh, like you didn’t enjoy the data collecting," Rodney sniffed, though he was trying not to laugh.
"Planning a follow-up study?" John asked with a leer, making Radek groan and flee.
"Well, there are some other hypotheses that I need to follow up on..."
"I’m all in favor of scientific method... although maybe we should continue this in our room?"
"A very good idea; someone might try to pirate my research otherwise."
"I’ll shoot them!"
Rover clacked his pincers in agreement, clearly prepared to defend John’s honor, and Rodney snickered.
"Then come on; Rover is ready to defend your virtue—at least from everyone except me."
John chuckled. "My heroes, one to protect me and one to ravish me." He caught Rodney’s hand and drew him to the door, glad the Daedalus wasn’t in residence so they didn’t have to pretend not to be together.
"Yes, well, just don’t get us confused," Rodney chuckled. "The girls might get jealous, and I know I will."
"I don’t really think there’s any danger of me getting you and Rover confused." John shook his head, ignoring the amused expressions on the faces of the people they passed in the corridors.
Rover scraped against the wall at that, making a razzing sound. "I think he agrees with you," Rodney grinned, stroking the cart’s housing.
"That’s because he’s a smart cart," John agreed, smiling at both of them. "You ever think that Rover should be the one in charge around here?"
"I certainly think he believes that," Rodney grinned as the cart shimmied and rubbed against his leg. "It’s a good thing Paul’s Pandora isn’t as smart as he is, or she’d stage a coup."
"Okay, I don’t need to be imagining the carts taking over Atlantis," John laughed. "We wouldn’t have a hope."
"Neither would the Wraith or the UAs," Rodney mused. "This might work."
"I think Elizabeth might have something to say about it if we try to replace her with Rover."
"Somehow I think Paul will complain as well; Rover isn’t who he wants to wake up next to."
"I think Rover prefers Reza and Ciora to Paul too," John laughed, and Rover bobbed up and down, clearly agreeing.
"He just doesn’t want the babies swarming him," Rodney grinned.
"Can you blame him? They’re cute, but they can be overwhelming."
"Do you hear me arguing?"
John chuckled. "Radek still glares every time he sees you."
"He loves them, and you know it," Rodney sniffed.
"But he’ll never admit it to you."
"Ahh, but I know it so I don’t have to hear the words."
John laughed. "You practice on me to figure out what’ll make him craziest, don’t you?"
Rodney’s answer to that was a smug grin.
"My own personal mad scientist," John said, still chuckling.
"Who is intending to experiment on you tonight," Rodney grinned.
"Hot damn!"
"More data for a follow-up paper," Rodney smirked, nudging John toward the bed.
"Far be it for me to stand in the way of scientific progress."
"Mmm, I do love willing lab rats," Rodney grinned, pushing John’s jacket off his shoulders and tugging at his shirt.
"That better just be one lab rat," John informed him, not sounding too worried, while he stood there and allowed Rodney to undress him.
"What do you think?" Rodney muttered, smacking John’s ass for the comment before working on his belt.
"I think if you do that again, I might come in my pants!"
"Getting kinky in your old age, Colonel?" Rodney chuckled. "Well, then, that’s a topic for another paper; this one involves how many licks it takes to get to the creamy filling of John Sheppard."
John shuddered. "Not very many," he said, his voice low and throaty.
"Are you trying to skew my data, Colonel?" Rodney asked archly, pulling the belt from John’s pants and tossing it away before going to work on his button and zipper.
"I’m trying to get sucked and fucked."
"And you will, when I’m good and ready."
John groaned pitifully, and Rodney grinned, shoving John’s pants down before dropping to his knees and mouthing him through his boxer briefs. "God yes, please," John gasped, grasping Rodney’s shoulders while Rodney smiled against him then licked his cloth-covered shaft.
"Jesus, Rodney!" Tremors of arousal ran down John’s spine.
Rodney murmured something unintelligible in response as he slid his hands up John’s thighs to tug at his underwear, slowly pulling it lower, finally licking at the head of John’s erection when it popped free of the confining cloth.
"Oh God, so good," John groaned, staring down at Rodney’s dark head at his groin, taking more of him in as his briefs were dragged lower and lower until Rodney was lapping at the full length of his cock. "I love your mouth," John whispered, petting Rodney’s hair, causing Rodney to hum out his agreement as he stroked his hands over John’s hips and sucked him hungrily.
"Not gonna last long if you keep that up," John warned breathlessly.
Rodney shrugged one shoulder and mumbled something around his cock, continuing to lick and suck at him, making John groan and thrust into Rodney’s mouth, Rodney’s hands tightening on his hips, urging him on.
"So good, love you," John gasped out an instant before he stiffened, pulse after pulse of semen filling Rodney’s mouth, the scientist swallowing greedily, continuing to suck at John’s softening flesh until he squirmed, then getting to his feet to kiss him.
John tasted himself in the kiss, and it sent another shudder of pleasure through him. He clutched Rodney tightly, rubbing against him shamelessly despite the almost painful sensitivity of his cock.
"Two hundred and thirty-seven," Rodney murmured once he could speak again.
John’s jaw dropped, and he stared at Rodney before starting to laugh helplessly. "You counted?!"
Rodney grinned and shrugged in answer. "Scientist, remember?"
"You really are a nut. But you’re my nut."
"And don’t you forget it, Col. Average 302."
"Nothing about me’s average," John replied with a grin.
"No, you’re quite above average," Rodney chuckled, reflexively arching his hips against John’s side.
"Exactly. And are you planning to do something with that?"
"You could always do a comparative study..."
"You think I could concentrate to count if I had you in my mouth?" John asked incredulously.
"Ahh, I suppose my superior intellect wins out again," Rodney smirked.
John snorted. "If you say so. But you might want to be nice to the guy who’s about to suck you off."
"I’ll start being nice when he’s sucking me off."
Laughing, John dropped to his knees and nuzzled Rodney through his pants, drawing a groan and a sharp thrust of his hips from him. John’s hands rose to cup Rodney’s ass, pulling him closer, and he mouthed the length of his cock, dampening the fabric and causing it to cling even more faithfully to Rodney’s erection.
"God, John," Rodney gasped, swaying before regaining his balance, his stomach muscles quivering as he struggled to remain upright.
"No falling. I need you undamaged," John said, grinning up at him before starting to unfasten Rodney’s pants.
"So get me to a chair or the bed or a wall," Rodney muttered.
"So I make you weak in the knees, huh?" John beamed at Rodney while nudging him toward the bed and then toppling him onto it with the application of a hand to Rodney’s chest.
"Obviously it’s from your manhandling," Rodney tried to sniff, though he was looking far too eager for it to be effective.
"So I guess that means I should stop ‘manhandling’ you then." John smirked down at him.
"You do that and I’m going to have Rover zap your ass."
John laughed as he undressed the prone scientist before nudging Rodney’s legs apart and settling between them. "Mmm, so many choices," he murmured, then blew softly on Rodney’s balls.
"Remind me to never make you come first again," Rodney groaned, his hands fisting in the blanket that covered their bed.
"Like you’re not enjoying it." John’s tongue darted out to lick the sensitized sac, drawing a low moan from Rodney’s throat. Loving the sound, John did it again before gently drawing one ball into his mouth and suckling.
"Keep that up and I’m going to come before you even touch my cock," Rodney gasped.
"I’d just have to get you hard again to make you come a second time," John assured him although he did draw back with a final lick.
"And then call Carson when I have a heart attack!"
"Now you know I’m not going to let you die," John scolded. "I have years of plans for you. And I know Rover plans to keep you alive forever."
"And you as well," Rodney added, squirming slightly at the lack of attention.
"So we can do more of this." John pulled Rodney’s legs over his shoulders and nuzzled the smooth, sensitive flesh behind his balls, making Rodney moan and squirm, trying not to tense up, wanting John to be able to explore all of him.
"You taste so good," John whispered, each breath flowing over Rodney’s skin, and Rodney could only whimper in response, his hips jerking spastically. John smiled at the reaction and licked the soft skin, sucking gently before continuing along his path, licking a trail between Rodney’s cheeks until he reached the tight ring of muscle.
Rodney shrieked and practically levitated off of the bed, every muscle tensing as John continued to tease him.
"I really love the noises you make," John murmured, smugness all but dripping from his voice, before swirling the tip of his tongue around Rodney’s entrance, applying a little more pressure with each pass but still teasingly light.
"Don’t—oh god—make noises," Rodney gasped, soft whimpers escaping his throat.
"Ah, must be the city settling then," John snickered, finally pushing the tip of his tongue inside Rodney.
"Bastard!"
"I thought I was a slut?"
"Slutty bastard!" Rodney hissed.
"And I’m all yours." John stopped talking then to concentrate on driving Rodney out of his mind by fucking him with his tongue, Rodney’s complaints trailing away to constant moans as he stroked himself, the pitch rising until he shuddered and came, blood-warm liquid splashing his stomach and pooling there.
John gave him a final lick and then slid upward to lap at the puddles of semen on Rodney’s belly, groaning at the flavor of him, drawing a happy sigh from Rodney.
"So?"
"So I love you."
"I meant so you didn’t keep count, but I love you too," Rodney chuckled.
"I had much more interesting things to do than count," John started, only to be interrupted by Rover banging a pincer on the wall to get their attention. Once he had it, he picked up a marker and wrote something on the top sheet of a pad of paper then held it up to show them a big "62."
"He writes?" John exclaimed, followed instantly by, "He counted?!"
"He’s Rover," Rodney murmured in response though he was giving the cart a proud smile.
"That does say it all," John agreed with a smile.
END
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