June 12 2002 - About 0700 hrs. The sun shines mercilessly, even if it only seven in the morning.
The start of the new day. And the exam beckons.So does the diary...how does Egg Egg cope with it?
Z: My, someone looks very delighted this morning! What's going on?
E: I found a picture of him. Side profile, the angle that I like the most! I fell so lucky! Maybe I can pass my exams afterall!
Z: What is so lucky about that? After Japan's astonishing performances, their faces would have been plastered all over the newspapers!!
E: Yes, but yesterday, my mom threw away most of the old newspapers, including the day-old ones.
Z: So how did you get a picture of H.N?
E: I accidentally left a copy of the newspaper report right after their match with Belgium under my bed. HEHEHE.
Z: Right. But have you finished studying yet?
E: No, but I can finish 400 pages in four hours. My exam's not until 15.00. It’s only nine plus in the morning now.
Z: A bit of a squeeze! You are too optimistic for you own good. And too lazy. And too heck-care.
E: You've got it right again, bro.
Z: Who's your bro? I'm an only child.
E: Can't you just pretend for a moment? Alright, pal, then.
Z: ......
E: Ignoring me, eh? Okay, I get the hint! You just can't stand me, can you? (hurt) Goodbye.
Z: Wait...
E: (hopefully) Yes?
Z: If you pass all your exams, wouldn't the chance of him reading your diary be increased to 100%?
E: Zell, silly boy! That would only happen if I passed my exams in the first place! And that, in itself, is such an unreliable gauge.
Z: B...but...
E: Let me change that to...say...France making it to the finals this year.
Z: B...but it's official that they are already out of the game!!
E: Exactly.
Z: Again, you're too optimistic. Leaving it too much to chance.
E: Let me tell you, the author of this story had had her Ancient Tales website up for close to three years, and the total number of hits was less than 3000! There are about ten billion people in Asia, possibly more. Calculate the chances...3000/3x365x10billion=0.infinity1. Look, don't even bother to use the calculator. The chances are so minute that it isn't worth the effort. What's more, this isn't that story. It isn't half as interesting. I'd be lucky to get ten hits.
Z: Al...alright. Don't bombard me with mathematics. But I get the feeling that you half-wish that he reads this.
E: Yisheigai Forbid!!
Z: Is that supposed to be a horrified expression? You don't fool me with that glint in your eye.
E:(Hastily) You're dangerous. Get away.
June 12 2002 – Eleven in the morning.
Egg Egg has decided that she had done enough studying. She switches on the computer to chat with Zell yet one more time, even though everyone is tired of all those chats already.
E: I'm right on schedule, Zell. I can even sneak in a little nap if I want to.
Z: Congratulations, then.
E: I'm only worried that I might get confused, or forget all the facts, even. The most horrible nightmare I've ever had was that I was sitting for my 'A' levels, and suddenly, the mind went completely blank. The dream actually happened just before I took my last exam...(shiver)
Z: If you're afraid of getting confused, then you should have spent more time revising!
E: I know, but my attention span is about as long as my eyelashes.
Z: That doesn't say much about it. Your attention span, that is.
E: Sigh. I know. I'll leave it all to Heaven and the Goddess of Mercy. And you're totally justified to be disgusted with me.
Z: I suppose I could understand, a little.
E: Besides, I'm always weak with subjects that need huge chunks of memory space. I think that I would fare much better with my next paper, which is Performance Management.
Z: Never heard of it.
E: It's something to do with analysing business information, and using it to make management decisions.
Z: How profound.
E: It really isn't, if you have a good lecturer. I thought that the one this time round was quite competent. At least he had a great sense of humour.
Z: I'm glad. I can't say that I don't sympathise with you. I wasn't very good at my studies, either.
E: But you managed to pass the SEED exam. And you more than make it up with your excellent fighting skills and wonderful physique. Which is why I always let you have all those strength, vitality, spirit, magic etc bonuses as soon as possible, after Squall had reached his peak.
Z: After is the operative word.
E: I didn't have a choice. He was the main character, so it was mandatory to select him! I would have appointed you as leader of the group, if I could.
Z: I know. I wouldn't dream of upstaging him. I'm not cut out to be a leader.
E: I love how your sarcastic comments poke me in the heart and conscience.
Z: Your words aren't exactly honey-coated, either.
E: So, we're even.
Z: Maybe.
E: I gotta nap again. Such a little piggy.
Z: Little?
E: Arghh, spare me just this once!
Z: (smacks her bottom, or tries to smack her botton) Off you go. Don't want to be late for the exam if you overslept!
E: Ouch! That would have hurt if it was real! I'm gone!!
Egg Egg returns from her exam.
Z: Hey, girl. How was your Tax Paper?
E: It was okay. Surprisingly easy. In fact, I spotted most of the questions that came out.
Z: That's great! But you look rather downcast. Why is that?
E: Well, it's one of those days where I feel like bursting into tears any second.
Z: (Alarmed) What's wrong, babe?
E: I have not the faintest idea! I can't put my finger on it... such a helpless feeling. It's as if a great cloud of melancholy has gone into my head. Maybe it's the lack of sleep.
Z: You're trembling! Why don't you lie down and rest for a while first?
E: (Unhappy) 'Fraid not. Have to study for my paper on Friday.
Z: You have to take care of yourself first! How are you going to take the exam if you fall ill?
E: Thanks, Zell. I'm touched by our concern. But there’s no time...no time at all to rest.
Z: You were all bubbly this morning with only a few hours left to study, and now this!! How fast you change your mind!
E: Sure, sure. You know women, and I'm one of them.
Z: What's this? A bump on your head the size of a pebble! You should get some medicine on it!
E: It's nothing...a metal crate fell on my coconut as I was shoving another into the rack.
Z: Poor girl...does this hurt?
E: It doesn't if you don't keep touching it! Leave me alone!
Z: Sheesh...I was just trying to help you.
E: You can help me by leaving me in peace.
Z: Alright, okay! So I'm unwanted here! (Terminates himself.)
E: (mumbles) Sorry, Zell. So sorry.
She leans back on her chair, pushing it a little off the ground and stares blankly at the ceiling.
E: I'm hopeless.
Tears stream down her face. And she loses her equilibrium, crashing to the ground with a great bang. Her head hits the metal bar of her bed, which was close by, on the sore spot, no less.
She blacks out for a wee moment.
E: Wha...at?
Z: I'm terribly sorry, Egg Egg.
E: No, it isn't your fault. I was performing acrobatic on a wobbly chair.
Z: (smiles) You have your sense of humour back again.
E: It's something to fall back on.
Z: That is such a sick joke!
E: The only way for me to stop this self-pitying is to make a joke out of it.
Z: Poor girl.
E: Your pity hurts me more than your sarcastic remarks, you know?
Z: (Dryly) I just can't resist your spunk.
E: Is that why you're spanking me?
Z: Who says I am?
E: (Shrugs) Just trying to coin a pun when I see one. Failing miserably as usual.
Z: Well, now! You look much better! You face was white as a sheet a moment ago!
E: Can't say yours was much better.
Z: I was terribly shocked, for cryin' out loud! The noise was horrendous. It's a good thing your head wasn't damaged...Uh oh...why that haunted look?
E: The fall reminded me of an unpleasant memory.
Z: Pray tell.
E: I was about four or five. I can't recall the exact age. I was waiting eagerly for my Dad to return from the office. So when the doorbell rang, I rushed to open the door for him.
The marble floor was kinda wet, and I slipped. I tried to cry out because of the pain, but my voice just wouldn't come out, cos I couldn't breathe for a moment. I was so, so scared.
Z: Didn't your Mom help you up?
E: She stood there and laughed at me. She even said: "Look, she can't cry out! Hahaha."
Z: Hmm...she thought that was funny?
E: It left a huge shadow in my memory, even if I can't remember a thing from that age. It hides in my sub-consciousness, and pops up during the most inopportune times. And I supposed I was all the more devastated cos I have the impression that most mothers would be gentle and cluck over their only daughter when she had fallen.
Z: That must have been a really big blow to your expectations.
E:......
Z: Say no more. What's past is past. I think you had better turn in for the night. The studying can wait.
E: (Nods) My head's really swimming now. You face has turned into a shapeless mess.
Z: How horrible. Let me tuck you in.
June 13 2002 0800 hrs
New day, new feelings. What had essentially been a great morning was ruined with just a few exchanges of words.
Egg Egg seemed to be frequently suffering from red eye disease...but this time, the cause was not due to her favourite player.
Z: Why the red eyes again? Another dream?
E: No, that wasn't it, even though I did have one.
Z: Let me guess...your Mother.
E: As usual. She had to put a damper on my spirits, which was finally lifting up after last night's accident(s).
Z: What did she do that was so aggravating to you?
E: Oh, the subject matter was so silly. I do not even want to mention it. But her attitude just drives me up the wall.
Z: Like how?
E: She likes to mock me in this annoying tone, mimicking my words. And then she had the gall to say that I was the best at bullying her. Who's the bully now?
Z: Oh.
E: I know that it's petty of me to be angry at her. She is, after all, the one who took care of me painstakingly for so many years. I ought to be grateful to her, and be filial to her. But sometimes, I just can't stand her tone. And then I throw all my reserve out of the window and start to wear a black face. And when it's all over, I feel so guilty, but can't bring myself to apologise.
Z: Let me teach you a way to stop yourself from flaring up, or to curb your tears if you are feeling sad.
E: Oh? Sounds interesting. Is it something like count to ten and hold your breath? I've tried that; doesn't work too well on me.
Z: No, no. My method is much better. Now firstly, get away from the source of your temper (or sadness) immediately. After that, if it's at night, and you're outdoors, look out for the brightest star in the sky and picture someone you like. Say, my face. And try to remember something nice about that person. I'm sure that your temper/sadness would have disappeared in no time.
E: And if I'm indoors, or the clouds obstruct the stars?
Z: Silly, look for a picture or something.
E: That sounds like it might work.
Z: If all else fails, you can pour out all your words in this diary, or talk to me. It helps, you know.
E: Now that you mention it.
Z: Tell me about the dream that lifted your spirits.
E: Huh? Oh. That one. It's a weird one.
Z: That's okay.
E: Well, the images seemed rather disconnected, so it might be a bit hard to follow.
I was in my room, studying or something. And people started barging in. I was about to protest when I saw a most important person coming in. I am sure that you can guess his name.
I quickly gathered all the things on my desk so that they couldn't see the amulet I had made with his picture. I was so thrilled when he had to move to the back of the room and stand beside me, due to the smallness of the room. Eaaagh, I'm so surprised! I could remember thinking. Then they started to sing the Japanese national anthem.
Someone had apparently taken a video of the proceedings. I managed to be able to stand next to him as we crowded together, watching the video.
But it wasn't for long. A beautiful woman squeezed in between us. She smiled sweetly at him, then glanced at me haughtily.
"You shameless cat." She said.
I ran away into the streets, and he actually chased after me! Unbelievable. But then I bumped into a dustbin, and it hurt so much that I had to fall onto my knees.
Then, the image shifted to something totally unconnected.
Z: Correct me if I'm wrong. I think this dream is the real one.
E: Zell! Are you implying that I had made up all the previous ones?
Z: I'm not implying it. I'm saying it.
E: You astonish me! You're absolutely...right.
Z: Ah ha. I thought they seemed rather contrived.
E: They were actually images which went through my mind as I listened to some music. I have that kind of habit. It happened when I was obsessed with your face, too. In a sense, they were dreams. Daydreams.
Z: Well, alright. What music were you listening to, then?
E: The ending theme of the FFVII OST. The last part where Rinoa and Squall stand in the balcony of Balamb Garden, and gazed at the beautiful stars in the night sky.
Z: (Smile) So what images came to your mind when you thought of me?
E: I'd be embarrassed to tell you.
Z: I don't mind.
E: Sure you won't freak out?
Z: I have a hardy constitution.
E: Okay, you've convinced me. Don't you dare laugh.
I was in the FFVIII world. It was at the Balamb beach, near you hometown. I stroll along the shore, the clear cool waters from the waves lapping at my feet. I look up at the sky. The clouds were bathed in the light of the setting sun, turning into a beautiful pink. Stars were glittering with a weak light, barely discernable.
At that perfect moment, you came up and took my hand. We exchanged a tight embrace.
As the score came to an end, you started to evaporate into glittery dust, and I was left on the deserted beach, feeling hapless, despondent and lonely at your sudden departure.
E: That was the exact thing going on in my mind.
Z: I don't know what to say.
E: Don't say anything, then. That would leave the image perfect.
Z: Do you actually wish for such a thing to happen? It's so sad.
E: Of course not! I have a good grip on reality, thank you. (A: No, you don't)
It's just that these images flit across my mind as I listen to the music. It's the same with those earlier daydreams I had mentioned. Must have been brain-washed by those Japanese-Burger commercials. Wahaha.
Z: (Puzzled) But they were nothing like what you described.
E: It was the feeling, silly.
Z: So do you mean to say that you woke up from the middle of your slumber just to describe those visions to me? That's so weird!! Why do you take all the trouble to do that? And forging those red eyes some more!!
E: I am a dramatic person by nature...I thought that it would look very nice if I were to pretend having them. And I really did feel kind of sad when I had those images......
Z: IMO, you have waaay too much time on your hands, and you spend too much time indoors. You should get out and have a life.
E: How can you say that!
Z: But you were awfully lucky to finally get a real dream.
E: (shrugs) It was nothing special. I didn't actually feel anything like heart beat acceleration or something of that sort. In fact, the only feeling I could remember was being insulted when the woman called me "you shameless cat". And at the end, the main character of the dream turned out to be someone else, not me.
Z: Major Weird!!!
E: Didn't I say it was? Sometimes, that happens in my dreams. I wonder why?
Z: But it always starts out as you?
E: Yep.
Z: That's good enough.
E: Zell, you should be a psychiatrist. You're good.
Z: Nah...(scratches head embarrassedly)
E: (pauses a little) That was quick. A whole new record.
Z: What was?
E: I seemed to have gotten over N.H. The whole cycle usually takes a few months to come to an end.
Z: Does that mean you don't like him anymore.
E: I'm not obsessed, if that's what you mean. But I still like his spirit, his resilience and blah. I will still support the Jap team. But the whole thing was only a transition stage. A spur of the moment thing, if you like. Must be the football fever burning in my mind.
Z: Oh no (warily)
E: ??? What?
Z: Nothing.
E: Bleh. I know what you're thinking.
Z: What am I thinking?
E: Won't tell you!! (devilish glint in the eye)
Z: You cheeky orang-utan!! I'll just as soon spank you!!
E: Catch me if you can!!
Z: Why you l'il!!
Somewhere in the background
"Egg Egg!! Come down to the shop this instant!!"
June 13 2002 2300hrs
Egg Egg studies for her exam. She is, however, unable to do it continuously before contemplating on chatting with Zell. Finally, she gives in to the temptation and switches on the Virtual Diary.
E: Zell Zell (notice that she resumed calling him Zell Zell again. Haven't seen that for a long time!), I'm nervous.
Z: Why? About what?
E: Tomorrow is Japan's match against Tunisia. And I can't be there to pray for them.
Z: Why are we on this subject again? (Sigh) I thought that you were nervous about your exam.
E: Oh, that. It's not a matter of great significance.
Z: I see.
E: Japan had better win the match. Then they might have a good chance to be among the top 8 teams in the World!! Yippee!!
Z: How about your exam?
E: Why do you keep mentioning it when I'm so enthusiastic about tomorrow's match?
Z: I just thought that I would set you priorities straight. It's not as if the results of the match would be dependant on you, by any chance.
E: I know, I know. Can't a girl dream a little?
Z: You dream too much, that's your problem.
E: (pout!)
Z: You look even uglier when you pout. Like a piggy face.
E: Hmmmph! It's none of your business! All you do is poke fun at me! My poor body is covered with holes from all that poking!
Z: I doubt it were true. Your thick padding of flesh and fat protects you against the thickest arrows.
E: Zell!!!
Z: Alright, Alright. Can't you take a joke?
E: There are certain limits as to where to draw the line.
Z: Ok, I admit that it's my fault! How do you want me to make it up to you?
E: Hold my hand while I sleep.
Z: Such a baby. You know full well that I can't touch you, cos I don't have a real body.
E: I don't care. I'm too nervous. I'll toss and turn all night, one.
Z: "Rock-a-bye baby. On the tree-top. Hope you dream of. The one whom you love."
E: Haha!! That doesn't go smoothly at all!
Z: I'm hopeless in such areas.
E: But it's the thought that counts. That's sweet, Zell Zell.
Z: Eaaagh! Are we getting all mushy again? Look at all the goosebumps on my skin!
E: Mush is good. It's soft, and goes down easy.
Z: Can't win an argument with you.
E: I still have a few questions to do before I go and meet Zhou Gong.
Z: Who's he?
E: Supposed to be the Chinese Deity that rules over sleep.
Z: So, you're worried about your paper, after all.
E: Just a little. So many things on my mind, and half the time all I do is sigh.
Z: Why?
E: Dunno. There's always this heavy burden on my breath. If I don't sigh, it only gets heavier, and I can't breath easily.
Z: Is there anything I can do to help?
E: You've done enough as it is. Just give me one of your sunny smiles.
Z: (Beams a megawatt smile at her.)
E: Much better!! Heehee!!
Z: You're so easy to please.
E: Sometimes, it takes the simplest things to make people feel happy. And more often than not, these do not cost money, but come straight from the heart.
Z: A poet we have here!
E: I'm sure many would agree.
Z: I'll chew on it.
E: It's not gum. There won't be any flavour, you know.
Z: But it's sweet, too. We're getting diabetic today.
E: Urgh......
Z: Oops...that's a taboo subject.
E: Never mind. Hadn't you better give your little pig-tailed girlfriend a call? She might be jealous that you're accompanying another girl in the middle of the night.
Z: She'll be sleeping, anyway. Besides, who's gonna hold your hand while you sleep, if I'm away?
E: I wasn't serious about that. I'll be up studying until morning, anyway.
Z: From the looks of it, you'll be chatting with me until the morning.
E: You're right, see you tomorrow.
Z: (waves) See 'ya.
E: Wait......(tries to peck him on the cheek)
Z: (holds one hand to his cheek) What was that for?
E: Hope you aren't mad at me for doing that.
Z: Not really. Just don't do it again. (Self –terminates hurriedly before anything else happens)
E: (looks forlornly after his retreating figure, heaving another heavy sigh.)
My favourite websites (hehehe)
Ancient Tales - Gods from Yishegai
The Cursed Living Doll
The Storyteller's Tent
The Virtual Diary with Zell Intro
Part I - The Re-education of Zell
Part II - What N.H. did to Egg Egg
Part III - Wistful Dreams
Part V - Egg Egg's prediction
The Zell and Hidetoshi Nakata Pictures
