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For How Long?


Duo stared at the wall in a befuddled sort of contemplation. By the light striping the wall he could tell it was indisputably morning, but the angle was all wrong. He was just about to shrug and close his eyes and burrow back under the covers for an extra ten minutes of sleep when he figured it out.

 He was in the wrong bed.

 With a bleat of surprise he yanked the covers into a tangled mess as he sat up, about to accuse the other occupant of the room of certain unspeakable deeds.

 "K'so, Heero, omae--" he growled, working up a good glare.

 Whoops.

 Not only was he in the wrong bed, but Heero Yuy was gone.

 "Oh, yeah..." Running fingers through the disheveled mass of his long chestnut hair, Duo made a face as he encountered knots and snarls. Long hair was a bitch to maintain. He shifted slightly on the bed and winced, rubbing his bottom. "Aahh, itai…" He blushed furiously crimson. It hurt a lot more this morning than it had last night.

 He glanced over at the clock. Eight-thirty. He himself didn't have a first period class, but that was undoubtedly where Heero was.

 Last night. He turned even redder as he remembered what'd happened. Finally, after months of absence, Heero had found him again. And Heero had had a very specific reason for finding him, much to his delight. He had locked the door and proceeded to screw him silly. And he was sore enough to prove it, too.

 Duo groaned and buried his head in the pillow, hair slithering over his shoulders to create a cocoon of sun-warmed heat.

Now what was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to face Heero?

Yes, he'd been wanting this to happen. He probably shouldn't be embarrassed, but he was. Embarrassed and…and…well, really damned sore! Heero shoulda warned him, or something! But the part that irked him most of all was that he'd just rolled over for Heero without a murmur of protest. Surely he should have resisted, at least a little.

Besides...where was this going?

Now that was a matter of some concern. Because, while maybe Heero was only in this for a quick roll in the hay, he couldn't accept anything less than being first in Heero's mind and heart. The way Heero was so deeply into his. Whether or not he knew it, Duo had fallen so hard for the Wing pilot he wasn't exactly sure what the first indication of it had been.

Duo considered falling asleep again, then grumbled as he shoved himself out of the secure net of warm blankets and headed for the boys' showers. Best not to be found still in bed by Heero, if he stopped in between classes.

He wasn't exactly sure what Heero's intentions were.

Part of him was afraid to ask. The other part of him was stubbornly insisting on having some answers before things progressed even further than they already had. Because he knew without being told that Heero would probably do it again.

Duo shivered as he stepped into the shower, and leaned forward, head down. It was an exciting sort of tingle. He turned the cold water way up. And washed himself very gingerly.

When he got back to the room, a biting musky odor assailed his nostrils and he clapped a hand to his head, eyeing the bed sourly. With its rumpled sheets and general state of disarray, it looked like the workbench of forbidden sensuality that it had been.

"Spot inspections are a bad thing," Duo said to the room at large, then hurried to gather the sheets up for a quick disposal. Relationships between boys that crossed platonic were something that weren't discussed in school policy, but everyone knew without having to search the rulebooks that the Headmaster of any given school would treat such an incident with expulsion.

 So he was hoping very desperately that he could manage not to walk funny. Someone might ask what was wrong with him…a teacher might send him to the nurse's office…ack! And an examination would reveal…would show…

 Duo felt heat burning up his cheeks in spite of himself as he headed back to his -- their -- room to gather up his books.

 Last night he -- they -- had...he closed his eyes and sat with a thump on his own unmade bed, swallowing hard. It was kind of surreal, in the light of the next day with distance between then and now. But last night Heero Yuy had taken his virginity.

And he'd wanted him to.

 Abruptly Duo stood and grabbed books off the desk, shoving them into his pack. For the first time in months, he felt the need to find the nearest church and a nice, comforting priest to sit and pour his heart out to. But that was the problem. What he'd done was a sin, and the priest would probably tell him not to do it again.

 Duo shivered again and clasped his bookbag to his chest, seeing Heero's piercing intent gaze, and the sensual curve of his bare trace of a smile.

 It wasn't just lust, he argued with himself as he hurried down the hall. The first period ending-bell shrilled out and dozens of students poured into the passage way, filling it up with a bustle that was easy to distract himself from the dilemma at hand as he dodged and wove a path to his first class of the day. If it were just lust...well, he'd dealt with that before. But Heero burned him in a way no one had ever touched before. Maybe, just maybe, he thought he might...love him.

 And that was a sin, too...or was it?

 "Later, I will deal with that later," Duo muttered to himself, then plastered a wide smile across his face as a pretty blonde girl bumped into him.

 "Ohayo, Duo-kun!" she said brightly.

 "Ohayo, Satori-chan," he replied cheerfully. In that moment he was resolved to make the best of it. Yes, damn it, he would have a good day, and he loved Heero. Whatever happened he would hang on to that.

 "I'm so glad I ran into you!" Satori gushed, putting a hand on his arm.

Duo grinned at her. "It's my charm and good looks, isn't it?"

 Satori giggled and he valiantly kept his smile in place. It was kind of flattering to have a fan club, he supposed, but some of them seemed to have cotton filler firmly in place of gray matter. And even though this one was the Superintendant's daughter, she was one of those.

"Akari, Yoko, and I managed to get tickets for the latest K-rock concert," Satori beamed at him, running a hand through her long golden locks. "Do you want to go with?"

"Ah, ojousan, I'm sorry," Duo nodded to her, affecting a sad expression. "I have to work very hard at my studies, because my parents are thinking of transferring me."

 "Oh, no!" Satori exclaimed, eyes wide and beginning to tremble. She clutched at her mouth. "That would be just awful!"

 Duo nodded again and sighed deeply. In one sentence, he covered both bases -- either he would be "too busy," or he and Heero would have transferred out of this school by then.

"Well, Satori-chan, I've got to get to my class," he excused himself, and she nodded, mouth still quivering.

 Two doors away from his class, he blinked and wondered if he was being an absolute fool. A simple way out of his dilemma, of course, would be to date a girl -- to date several girls. He'd never actually given girls much of a second thought, before, despite flirting outrageously sometimes. It had never occurred to him.

 Duo flopped his bookbag onto his desk and moodily buried his head into folded arms. No, he couldn't do that. It would be unfair to the girl involved, who might fall head over heels. He would totally be denying his own true feelings. And he might destroy whatever chances he did have with Heero.

He wanted those chances.

 The bell was a hair away from ringing and the teacher was already opening his lesson plan when the last student sauntered into the class, bookbag balanced carelessly over his shoulder. Duo looked up into the familiar intensity of cobalt irises and did his damnedest not to let the heat spreading through his middle creep up into his cheeks.

Heero Yuy, present and accounted for.

* * *

The lesson wasn't very indelible with the slim-shouldered form two seats away presenting such a riveting alternative. The long chestnut braid snaked down past the seat of his chair and from time to time slender fingers reached down to toy with it absently. Heero watched almost transfixed even though he tried to keep his eyes on the teacher at the head of the class, lecturing away.

Duo shifted from side to side in his chair, a compact bundle of quicksilver energy impossible to constrain entirely. Heero observed in an almost detached fashion how Duo couldn't seem to sit still for more than a few seconds at a time. Actually, the way he was squirming, it was almost as if he was in pain…

Heero felt himself start to blush and looked down at once. Oh. He hadn't thought of that before. He should have warned Duo, or…well, something. He looked at Duo again. Other than constantly being in motion, though, he seemed just fine. More than just fine. He was beautiful…

Then Heero turned his eyes downward and began taking notes. He couldn't understand why he was so distracted by the braided pilot's merest twitch.

Duo was his, after all -- he'd proved it last night. He didn't need to dwell on the mere thought of him anymore. He didn't need to run over that slender body with mental fingers and an appraising eye when he could have it any time.

Why, then, couldn't he chase Duo from his constant preoccupation?

It puzzled him all through the class period as the sense of him burned along his skin. All he wanted to do was grab Duo and haul him back to their room. Or even the nearest broom closet. To kiss him, or touch him, or just brush a hand over his smooth skin. 

He had never wanted anything this badly before.

The beat of the class period was measured in simple things for Heero. How many times Duo changed position in his chair; the number of times he played with the end of his braid. Every time he turned and Heero caught a glimpse of his profile. It was intoxicating at the same time as it remained thoroughly confusing. 

The bell rang, bringing relief for the entire class along with him. He grabbed up his bookbag and bumped deliberately against Duo on the way out.

Flicking a casual, impersonal glance at him revealed his fellow pilot's fluster. Duo looked like he wanted to say a million things at once, but didn't dare. "Well?" he raised an eyebrow coldly.

Duo frowned at him. "Sumimasen," he muttered, looking put out. 

Heero broke away into the mobbed hallway quickly. Close, he was way too close. Duo's body, crowded against him in the press of students, was too much temptation. That combined with the tickle of breath against his cheek was terribly erotic, and completely forbidden. He knew that as well as the next boy. 

Boys weren't supposed to chase after other boys.

* * *

This was one of the worst days of his life. Definitely.

One of the longest, that was for sure. Heero had disappeared shortly after the brush-off following second period, and Duo hadn't bothered to hunt for him during lunch. Those hard eyes had told him everything he needed to know. During the day, he was nothing to Heero.

Maybe he really was just simple gratification, to Heero. After all, he was supposedly the "perfect soldier." He had jumped off a thirty-plus story building without a parachute, and walked away with nothing more serious than a broken leg. Which he had set with his own two hands. And when it came to satisfying physical lust, why not be every bit as expedient?

Duo tucked his mouth down along with his head, burying his hands deep in his pockets. Gym period was next, and he didn't know if he'd be sharing that with Heero or not. He didn't think he wanted to. Two words.

Communal showers.

Heero hadn't been exactly warm and fuzzy in bed, but he hadn't been expecting that. But...it would have been nice, just maybe, to have real assurance. Duo had no idea one way or the other if Heero did feel anything for him, even if he had sought him out after months had passed.

Yet, Heero'd had the courtesy to ask him if he wanted to, that very first time when they'd been interrupted. And he had wanted Heero to do it, and he still didn't regret it. He winced again. Even if he was damned sore. But it was supposed to hurt the first time, wasn't it? So, well, he could ignore that. There was just one thing missing from this whole equation.

Why did Heero do it?

It was basketball today in the gym, bringing with it the inevitable recollection of playing basketball with Heero. Even back then as they swept the courts Duo had occasionally fumbled the ball or fouled a play because he was caught up with the sight of Heero's bottom flexing against those tight gym shorts.

Damn it, why did everything have to come back to Heero?

Duo shrugged on his white gym shirt and laughed and joked with the other guys in the locker, ignoring the boy at the end of the row pulling his red shorts on, dark head bent.

"Oi, Duo man, I heard you turned Satori-chan down," one of his classmates leaned over, eyes goggling at him incredulously.

Heero Yuy's head popped up at that.

"No way! Duo-kun, Satori and her friends are gorgeous! You're missing a golden opportunity!" another boy leered, slapping him on the shoulder.

"Well, it's never too late," Duo agreed recklessly, watching Heero out of the corner of his eye. "Satori isn't my type, but Yoko, now..."

Heero began stalking up the row.

Duo shut up hastily and let the other boys chorus in appreciation of Yoko's charms. He swallowed hard. If Heero made a scene now, they would be finished at this school. More than finished.

In a rush of air, Heero passed him without even a frigid glance and Duo began to breathe again.

The other boys didn't even notice. That was another thing. If they knew -- if they even suspected -- he and Heero would be so far outcast in this microcosmic teenage society that even passing civil social exchanges would have to be shipped in to them. They'd be pariahs. Worse. They would be school curiosities.

The local fags.

Duo scowled and left the locker room. The boys behind him were still crudely dissecting Satori's merits versus Yoko's. They had reached cup size.

Out on the court, Heero was folding his arms and glaring around impartially. Duo ran a hand over his hair and sighed. The uniform shorts in this school were even shorter than the last one.

Basketball was going to be a total loss.

* * *

He glanced over at Duo as the brown-braided boy darted across the court, weaving a steady path with basketball and sneakers. Just his luck, that Duo would end up on the opposite team -- here, basketball was practically a body contact sport. Touching Duo in public was not a good thing.

At least they weren't playing tackle football.

He knew it was going to be a foul even before he slammed into Duo but at that point he didn't really care. Maybe with any luck the gym teacher would bench him for the rest of the period.

They went down on the floor in a tangle of limbs. Duo looked stunned. For a moment Heero felt guilty, then his jaw hardened. Duo was the one who was doing this to him, in the first place.

"Shit, Yuy, why don't you break a few bones while you're at it?" Duo demanded, shoving him off and climbing to his feet. His expression was hurt for a brief instant, before it turned to anger.

"Maxwell-kun, are you all right?" the teacher inquired, jogging up. "That looked like a nasty fall."

"I'm fine," Duo flicked his fingers dismissively, giving the teacher a wide grin. "Heero can't hurt me."

The tone was defiant. Almost as if he was trying to convince himself.

"Yuy, take a time out," the teacher ordered, giving him a hard glance.

He shrugged. "Fine." He trudged over to the sidelines.

It was no use, of course. Duo was the only player who stood out, with his dazzling smile and loud mouth and braid of unusually long hair. He watched him until class was dismissed, and the teacher sent them to the showers.

After that, he turned his back and picked the showerhead the furthest distance possible.

* * *

Duo rubbed irritably at his ear. It wouldn't pop, and he was convinced there was water trickling around in there somewhere. Lord, you'd think he had gone swimming and not simply taken a shower. Granted, though, he had submerged himself completely in the icy torrent to prevent from thinking certain thoughts.

Finally, at last, this long day was over and he was trying to think up some very plausible reasons to avoid Heero. Or at least, some way to ask Heero if all he wanted was one thing.

He set his bookbag on his desk and sank onto the bed with a sigh. Then, after pause for consideration, he got up and moved to a chair.

The door clicked open and he averted his eyes.

"Damn you," Heero growled out at once, shutting the door behind him.

Duo looked up, eyes wide. Heero sounded angry with him. What the hell--!?

The lock clacked home as Heero twisted it savagely and turned to face him. "Do you know -- do you have any idea -- how HARD it is for me to ignore you?"

Duo considered trying to say something, then decided it would be wiser not to sound like a smartass just now.

Heero advanced with smoldering eyes. "You weren't helping any, with your sad face and sighs."

Duo started. He'd noticed?

"I--I thought all you wanted was just..." Duo faltered and stopped. He scowled into Heero's intent, but puzzled face. "You certainly acted like you didn't give a damn for me."

Heero's expression was suddenly focused and calm. "Duo, I can hardly hold your hand in the hallway," he pointed out with reason.

"I know. I don't expect you to," Duo stared at his hands. "But it would help if I knew how you feel about me."

"How I feel..." Heero echoed, face suddenly blank.

Duo felt utterly miserable but he had to plow on, anyhow. That little part of him that demanded answers had wriggled its way to the top. "If you're just here for sex," he clarified, "or if you really do want me." Because with him, it was part and parcel. He wanted Heero because he loved him. And loved him, maybe, because he wanted him so much.

He couldn't accept anything less in a partner.

Heero crossed the room in a couple of swift strides and Duo flinched back, knowing the strength in those hands. But still wanting to feel them on his body.

His shoulders were seized and he was pulled roughly to his feet and a frantic cursing babble started up in the back of his head, calling him a fool for pushing Heero for answers. Then he had a fraction of a second to register that Heero wasn't hitting him, after all.

Heero was kissing him.

"Mmm..." He melted under the touch of those lips and the hands were already gentling, slipping around him, arms pulling him up against that slender muscular body as fingers stroked against the small of his back.

Heero pulled back and they were both flushed, breath pouring into each other's mouths, before the Wing pilot leaned just barely forward and took his bottom lip, running the tip of his tongue along it. Duo let his eyes fall shut and pulled Heero closer, if it was possible to find an inch of unused space between their bodies fit so taut one against the other.

"You're mine." Heero hugged his waist closer, pulling Duo's body into the sway of his hips. "You're mine, Duo, that's how I feel about you."

Duo's breath was lodged somewhere in his throat but he forced sound past it, somehow. "For how long?"

Heero blinked. Then his brows lowered in a jet black rush. "Do you think I'm going to get tired of you, Duo?" He was angry again.

"I need to know," Duo insisted, wanting only to bury his head against Heero's neck but forcing himself to meet the piercing blue eyes head-on.

Heero tilted his head. His eyes were suddenly appraising. "Do you love me, Duo?"

Duo's eyelids slammed up against his brow bone. "Uh..."

"Do you?" Heero persisted, his inflexible hands permitting no escape as Duo squirmed.

He let his head drop, nose nearly touching Heero's collarbone. "Yes," he muttered, defeated. "Yes, I do."

"As long as you love me," Heero spoke into the wake of his admission, "that's how long I will."

Duo froze, breathing into the hollow of Heero's throat, unsure if he had heard him correctly. Then he raised his head, nearly banging the crown on Heero's chin but he had to meet his eyes. Those calm, matter-of-fact searchlight-searing eyes.

"And if I decide to love you forever?"

"Zutto, then. That's how long I will."

Duo clutched him into his arms, burying his face against the collar of his shirt, barely able to breathe but supremely happy. He lifted his face and Heero was looking at him, his expression not precisely soft but indecipherable and focused on him. Only him. And it was then, as Heero kissed him again, harder, hands cupping him possessively, that Duo realized he hadn't finished his sentence. How long Heero would...what?

They curled up on the bed together and Heero wouldn't let him go for an instant, kept kissing him, touching him, and every time he caught a glimpse of Heero's eyes they were unmistakably intent, but a bit puzzled. He knew what he wanted, but there was something more.

"Ano--Heero, I don't think--"

"Eh?" Heero looked up from nuzzling the hollow of his throat, eyes hazy with desire.

"I don't think I can do that again," Duo said plaintively.

Heero blinked. "But you said--"

"Oh, I want to," Duo hastened to assure him. "I want to, I really do, Heero -- I mean, who wouldn't? You're too damn sexy for your own good, you know that? So I want to, it's just…well, ano…"

"Duo." Heero grabbed his chin. "Just say it."

Duo gulped. "Uh, I--uh--I'm too sore--"

"Baka." Heero thumped him on the head. Duo blinked in surprise.

"What?" he inquired, surly, rubbing at his head.

Heero was smiling. He was actually smiling. "We don't have to do that."

"Eh?" This time Duo blinked.

"Duo--there are plenty of things we can do without doing that--" And Heero pulled him close and proceeded to demonstrate a few.

Duo sighed with utter happiness and pulled Heero closer.

Those strong hands grabbed his hips and pulled him in close. Duo paused from unbuttoning Heero's shirt. "Hmm?"

There was a real smile on his face, and it was only for him.

* * *

He drew a line across Duo's spine with the flat of his hand, fitting the lithe muscled body even closer to his. They were both hot and sweaty and it should have been uncomfortable but Heero had never felt happier in his life. Duo's face was peaceful now, all the tension seeped out of his shoulders, and Heero had to admit he felt better, too. From more than just physical release.

"Forever," he repeated in a barely-audible whisper, his hands still roaming over the damp skin. Duo's nose twitched and he wriggled closer, sighing with content. "That's how long I will love you, too."

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