Site hosted by Build your free website today!

Don't Know Much About History


[Begin Music]
 The camera fades in on Duo Maxwell's adorable but extremely bored face.  He's in the position that most students know so well -- chin in hand, elbow on desk, slumped down and forward.  On the blackboard is written "Colony Colonization Unit", and the old teacher is droning on and on, pointing to various chalk marks with a big yardstick.  Gradually Duo's eyes droop down and down...

/Don't know much about history

Duo's head hits the desk with a clunk as he falls asleep.  A not-so-gentle poke from offscreen wakes him up and he stared, grinning nervously, at an extremely displeased Heero Yuy.


/Don't know much biology

In a bio lab, surrounded by kids, Duo makes an "ewww" face as he prods his specimen -- a large dead green frog -- with some sort of probe.  Using some of the pins used to attach the frog to the dissection tray, Duo gives the animal metallic "rabbit ears", like on a TV antenna, on its head.

/Don't know much about a science book

Somewhere in a hangar bay, Heero is sitting on a bench and reading Mobile Suit Maintenance Monthly with a mildly interested expression on his face.  He glances over at Duo, who's reading the same thing.  But as the camera moves to behind him, we notice that the braided boy is holding a manga inside the cover of the magazine.  Silently, he chuckles to himself.

/Don't know much about that French I took

Heero and Duo, obviously undercover and dressed in tourist clothes, walk nonchalantly down a Paris street.  Duo looks at a map, squints, and flips the map 90 degrees before saying, "Ohhhh!"  and glancing guiltily at the ground.  Heero slaps his own face with his hand and accosts a passer-by.  The pair start to converse rapidly in French, the man giving Heero directions.  Duo looks on, totally clueless as to what they're saying.

/But I do know that I love you

In another boring class, Duo nonchalantly folds a paper airplane.  After a moment of indecision, he grins maniacally and writes "To My Koibito" on it with a pink marker-pen, sure to adorn it with lots of hearts and bubbles.  It's obviously time to embarrass Heero.  Duo lines up his aim, makes sure the teacher isn't looking, and pitches the glider at his Japanese classmate, who's sitting across the room.

/And I know that if you love me too
/What a wonderful world this would be

Without removing his eyes from the teacher, Heero catches the airplane in one hand, crumples it up without looking at it, and pitches it back at Duo.  It hits the braided boy in the forehead.  Amid giggles and muffled laughter, Duo sighs and starts to reluctantly take notes.

/Don't know much about geography

Heero and Duo are riding in a compact car down a country road.  As Heero drives along with a cool demeanor, Duo looks at a map... then recoils guiltily.  He nudges Heero, looks elsewhere, then coughs nervously, like an eight-year-old that's managed to spill paint on a new sofa.  Heero seizes the map and his jaw drops in disbelief.  This time, he smacks /Duo's/ face with his hand.

The Wing pilot, shaking his head hopelessly, points to the compass rose in the center of the map.  His finger lands on the word "NORTH".  Then, as if explaining it to someone very small, he points straight out his window to the direction that, sure enough, IS north.  Duo's eyes light up in slow understanding.

/Don't know much trigonometry

Duo, sitting at a desk, receives a math test.  Chuckling to himself, he starts doodling Chibi-Shinigamis and various SD creatures on the margins, occasionally crossing out and rewriting parts of story problems to make them funny... but, of course, filthy, too.  As an afterthought, Duo writes down random numbers and witty comments for the answers.

/Don't know much about algebra

Sitting at the same desk, Duo receives a slip of paper.  It's dripping in red ink -- literally.  It's his test.  The whole thing, front and back, has somehow been painted over.  A few drops fall off here and there, staining the desk.  A yellow post-it note attached to it reads, "See me."  The math teacher, a grumpy and uptight-looking old woman who does /not/ approve of Duo in the least, grins a toothy smile.

/Don't know what a slide rule is for

Back at the dorm, Duo is talking to Heero nonstop, as usual.  As is also routine, Heero is typing away on his laptop, not really paying attention.  As Duo pulls his defaced and dripping exams out of his backpack, Heero reluctantly looks over at the sheets.  His fingers stop moving in shock.    Slowly we watch Heero's face shift from uncomprehending cluelessness to slow realization to incredulity.  The camera focuses on the large window beyond the braided boy, which cracks as Heero screams, "BAKA!!!!!"

/But I know that one and one is two
/And if this one could be with you
/What a wonderful world this would be

As Heero's handsome form types away and completes his homework perfectly, Duo looks on in infatuation.  As the Wing pilot's gaze slowly moves over to him, Duo looks elsewhere.  Bowing his head, the braided boy grits his teeth and starts to work out some of the problems, erasing and crossing out all the while.

/Now I don't claim to be an "A" student
/But I'm trying to be

Duo looks at a new, fresh math test.  Concentrating, he chews his eraser and works the buttons on his calculator.  This time, Duo seems to actually be working.  Eventually the sheet is filled with work, crossed out algebra, and lo and behold... answers!

/For maybe my being an "A" student, baby,
/I can win your love for me

Back in the dorm, the window still hasn't been fixed.  Cloud-shaded sunlight is streaming in the numerous cracks and holes in the glass, though.  Grinning, the Deathscythe pilot hands his latest test over to Heero.  It's an 81.  The Japanese boy responds with a muted "Hn." and walks towards his laptop.

/Don't know much about history

Back in the History room, Duo receives a graded test on the Colony Colonization Unit.  65%.  With a sigh, he starts to reluctantly check answers and look up corrections.  Off to the side, Heero eyes him... interested in what the braided pilot's doing.  Heero's lips push out in surprise: Duo's being serious for once.

/Don't know much biology

Another lab in science, this time a dissection of a fish.  Duo grabs tweezers and starts to pull scales off of the animal, forming little lines and dots.  He's written half of "Shinigami wa sugoi desu!" in Japanese characters when Heero nears him.  Hurriedly, the Deathscythe pilot flips the fish over and starts working.  He is pleasantly surprised to see Heero flash a quick nod of acknowledgement at him.  Was he smiling, even just a little bit...?

/Don't know much about a science book

Sitting in alone in the dorm room, Duo grins and looks over at a tempting stack of unread manga and a package of Pocky... then over at the thick reference materials for Deathscythe's AMBAC (Active Mass Balance And Control) system.  He moves over towards the comics, pauses, and an image appears in his mind: that almost-smile that Heero had given him back in biology.  Duo shrugs and leans over.

When Heero enters the room, he notices a markedly different braided baka than the one he thought he'd find.  Duo is eating the Pocky... but also poring and annotating the Gundam's manual in pencil.

/Don't know much about that French I took

Heero and Duo enter an average-quality hotel room, dressed in their tourist clothes.  Duo sits down, feigning exhaustion.  As Heero steps into the bathroom, Duo glances around, afraid to be seen by his partner... then pulls out a French phrasebook.  His lips move and form the odd, unfamiliar words as he slowly reads a few pages to himself.

/But I do know that I love you
/And I know that if you love me too
/What a wonderful world this would be

Seated in a cafe somewhere, a relaxed Duo converses with Heero, who is drinking a cup of coffee.  It's obvious that he's talking about what he usually talks about... nothing in particular.  Rather than ignoring him, though, the stoic boy actually seems to be listening to what Duo's saying.  At the end of his little speech, the braided boy finishes off with an elaborate hand-gesture and smiles at his friend.  To Duo's utter delight and surprise, Heero favors him with his own quick, shy grin.


Duo, sitting again in the history room, gazes into the blue skies outside.  The image of Heero's little grin has caught his imagination.  Some nameless classmate taps him on the shoulder and passes him a paper.  It's a history test with a 95% written on it.  He grins to himself at his score, and carefully files it away in his backpack.


Another dissection... but this time, Heero doesn't have to approach Duo for the braided boy to start working.  When he does move near him, Duo looks up from his project and gazes into Heero's eyes, longingly.  Heero takes the prudent path and decides not to be too blatant... but returns the stare with a little smirk of his own.

/Science books,

Again, alone inside the hotel room, Duo is sitting on his bed and diligently examining a book entitled "How To Read Maps".  As he does so, he sips a soda and pores over a new-looking road atlas.  Outside, the sun is shining low in the afternoon sky.  And the next time he and Heero have to go on a roadtrip, he'll be prepared...

/French I took,

The sun outside the window has moved downwards towards the city horizon and twilight; perhaps an hour or two has passed.  Duo has studied the Gundam manuals, a history text, and he's now moved on to the French phrasebook.  His soda is completely gone.  He's concentrating very hard on the book, mouthing out the words silently.  So hard, in fact, that he doesn't notice Heero walking softly into the room.

/But I do know that I love you
/And I know that if you love me too
/What a wonderful world this would be

Duo realizes that Heero's standing perhaps ten feet away, and nonchalantly tosses the book aside.  However, he does not do it before Heero sees what he's been reading.  The Wing pilot smiles to himself, but Duo catches a glimpse of his happy expression as well.  Heero, awkwardly, murmurs something about a walk outside, and reaches down to Duo with his hand, in a self-conscious and inviting gesture.

Duo looks up at his friend in disbelief.  Is this really happening...?  Heero nods, as though telepathically aware of Duo's thoughts, and smiles a vulnerable but honest smile... something real and tangible.  Duo laughs softly and takes Heero's hand and gets up, stretching and grinning at the same time.  Arm in arm, they slowly stroll towards the exit of the room.  But before they can get to the door, Duo gulps, looks at his friend nervously... then grins, leans over and gives Heero a quick kiss on the cheek.

Heero's face lights up with relief and unrestrained happiness.  With a caring but intense expression on his face indicating that he's more than happy to reciprocate, Heero closes his eyes and slowly kisses Duo's smiling mouth.  As Duo's eyes widen in surprise -- he still can't believe it's really happening -- Heero manages to murmur softly, "You really are a baka."

The Wing pilot slowly pulls his friend over into his grasp and enfolds the braided boy in his arms in a loving, possessive hug.  Duo snuggles his head onto Heero's shoulder, totally content.  The Japanese boy gently moves his hands around the Deathscythe pilot's back and whispers in his ear, almost too softly to hear...

"And I love you for it."

[Fade to black]


Return to Reiko-chan's Dirty Books