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Fortune Cookies


It takes a lot to blow Heero Yuy's mind. Duo after one too many Jell-O shots counts as "a lot." Hence the reason the just-a-little-tipsy American boy (along with the rest of the surprised pilots) was treated to a fairly startled Heero.

"What... did you... say?"

Duo glanced at his fortune again. The waiter at the Chinese takeout restaurant had been nice enough to shove a fistful of fortune cookies into their to go bag, giving each of them several cookies apiece. He narrowed his eyes and tried to make out the fuzzy words. "Others look to you for guidance ... in bed." With that he turned a wicked grin on his friends.

Wufei glanced at the offending slip of paper. "It just says, 'Others look to you for guidance,'" he pointed out. Duo shrugged. "Wu-man, it's a little known fact that there is not a single fortune cookie out there that can't be improved by adding the words, 'in bed,' to the end of it. I'm dead serious, every fortune makes way more sense if you add those two little words."

"Uh huh." The Chinese pilot didn't look impressed.

Trowa looked between Duo and Wufei, glanced at Quatre (who shrugged), and cracked open his own first fortune cookie. "If your aim in life is nothing; you can't miss," he read.

" bed!" Duo added, giggling.

The others all stopped and thought about that for a second, then Wufei coughed discretely, Trowa reddened slightly, and Quatre actually chuckled. The blond pilot cracked open his cookie next. "Your luck is about to change."

" bed!" This time, Trowa actually joined Duo on the chorus.

Quatre sweatdropped, turning somewhat red. Trowa just looked mildly amused. Heero rolled his eyes in boredom, and Wufei snickered.

Wufei cracked open his cookie next. "You look great, and you know it."

"In Bed!" Now Quatre, Trowa and Duo all crowed it. Wufei glared daggers at them. Quatre meeped and scooted to the other side of Trowa, putting the taller pilot between himself and Wufei. Simple logic, if Trowa loved Quatre, he'd be *willing* to risk his life for the blond pilot.

Four pairs of expectant eyes turned to Heero. He sneered at them and cracked open his cookie, wondering why he was bothering. "You will soon go through some physical changes..."

"In bed!" the other pilots chorused. Duo was positively crowing, while the others giggled... well, except Wufei, who was too manly to giggle, and snickered instead. Or chortled. Something masculine like that.

Duo cracked open another one. "Your athletic abilities are extraordinary --"

"In bed!" the other pilots, sans Heero, laughed.

Heero glared at everyone in general and no one in particular, stood up, grabbed the end of Duo's braid, and dragged him off to the back bedroom, determined to prove that stupid cookie wrong.

Okay, so the cookie was right. You can't expect even the Perfect Soldier to beat the almighty Fortune Cookie, now can you?


Very stupid, I know. Comments and criticisms welcome, flames will be used to toast marshmallows.

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