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Trials of the Heart


[I took my love, I took it down,
Climbed a mountain and I turned around,
I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills,
'Till the landslide brought me down.]

Duo packed his bags. 'I made a fool of myself,' he thought to himself. Duo had confessed his love to Heero and the other pilot had just sat there, then got up and left with a glare in the brunette's direction.

'Yeah, that was really stupid, but I thought he cared about me,' He thought. 'That's why you're stupid, Duo,' he replied to himself.

Duo looked at himself in the mirror. His reflection smiled cheerfully back at him. His mask still remained in place. 'Good,' he thought, 'At least no one else will suspect... I'd better leave now before my resolve melts.'

[Oh, mirror in the sky,
What is love,
Can the child within my heart rise above,
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides,
Can I handle the seasons of my life.]

Heero walked down the street. 'I must've hurt him pretty badly to just have walked out like that, especially when he...' Heero mused over the day's events, the day was not yet half over. He looked up at the sky and watched a rainbow paint itself in the distance.

Heero muddled over the feelings in his own heart. What is love anyway? He was the Perfect Soldier. He did not know emotions. Or did he? He was unsure of what exactly they were, but his - heart? conscience? - panged at the thought of Duo. That beautiful, long haired pilot that he had become so close to.

Heero decided to return to the dorm he and Duo shared. When he arrived he discovered a note from Duo. 'He left! Did I hurt him that much??' Heero nearly screamed at himself for being so insensitive.

[Well, I've been afraid of changing,
Cause I've built my life around you,
But time makes you bolder,
Even children get older,
And I'm getting older too.]

Duo wandered the street, his pack of precious things and clothes slung over his shoulder. 'I feel like death warmed over. Damn,' he cursed himself as he felt the hot tears roll, unbidden, down his cheeks. He ran. His heart pumped hard and soon his breathing became labored. He sat down on a bench, some how he had found his way to the park where he had first realized that he loved Heero.

He lay down. They were not children, the war had made them men before their time. Men could love. 'Love,' he thought bitterly, 'Could we really?' His thoughts tailed into sleep.

[Well, I've been afraid of changing,
Cause I've built my life around you,
But time makes you bolder,
Even children get older,
And I'm getting older too,
Oh, I'm getting older too.]

Heero looked at every place he thought Duo could possibly be. 'Why was I so harsh to him?' He thought, 'I know that I must have hurt him. Why do I care so much? Could I too...' Heero stopped mid-stride. 'If he loves me... he'll come back... right? Maybe he's already back...'

Heero went back to the dorm. 'I'll just go and tell him how I feel... but... how do I feel?' and a tiny part of him replied, 'Just go with your heart. Just say what feels natural.'

[Oh, Take my love, take it down,
Climb a mountain and turn around,
If you see my reflection in the snow covered hills,
Well the landslide will bring it down.]

Duo awoke. It was dusk and it was getting cold. 'I'd better just go back, I have no where to go, but man did I piss him off. I was real stupid. I'll just tell him that it was a joke and try and get over him.'

Duo walked into the dorm room. All his intentions of telling Heero it was a joke, melted away as he stared at the spectacle of flowers and dinner. Heero Yuy stood before him. Hands on his slim hips. His uniform shirt unbuttoned revealing smooth flesh that made Duo thing of a million things he wanted to do to that flesh.

The boy stepped forward to him. Lifted a hand, gently caressing the stunned boy's cheek. Heero cupped his face in his hands and tilted the heart-shaped face up to gaze into the wide violet eyes. He closed the space between their faces and gently brushed his lips over the other boys.

Duo was trembling slightly. Heero took his mouth, tentatively at first, then with more of a hunger. Duo stiffened and Heero pulled away slightly, seeing the slight shock in Duo's eyes. He re-closed the space between them and placed strong arms around the smaller boy's shoulders.

Heero tugged off Duo's t-shirt, then began caressing the soft skin. Every caress setting nerve endings alight. Duo relaxed into the kiss and fondling, he tightened his arms around Heero's waist, because he wanted to be closer to him and his knees were about to buckle beneath his own weight. As if sensing this, Heero picked him up and carried him over to the bed and proceeded to remove all unnecessary articles of clothing. Soon only boxers remained.

Heero hoped he wasn't going too fast. He lay atop the slender boy and played with the wisps of hair that framed the heart-shaped face. He kissed the soft lips, letting his tongue play over them.

Duo parted his lips to allow Heero's questing tongue admittance. When they broke for air Heero said, "I didn't mean to drive you off... I'm... sorry."

"I... I thought... I thought you didn't want me? I thought you liked Relena..." Duo said tentatively.

"Why would you ever think that?" Heero's voice was harsh and made Duo flinch, but he looked up at the other's face and saw the slightest hint of a smile play over those soft, yet firm, lips. Heero kissed him again, putting him at ease. Duo knew that he need not ask something that stupid again.

"What comes next, then?" Duo asked, hopefully.

"I'll show you..."

[If you see my reflection in the snow covered hills,
Well the landslide will bring it down,
The landslide will bring it down.]

When the finished, laying tangled in a mass of limbs, Heero mumbled something incoherent into Duo's hair.

"Hunh?" Duo asked.

"I said: You'll never have to worry about love again. Believe me when I say that...' and with that Heero faltered... 'I... lo -- care about you.'" He sputtered.

"I love you too." Duo said as he drifted to sleep in his lover's arms.

Heero stared down at the boy sleeping wrapped trustingly in his arms. Heero brushed sweaty hair from Duo's face. The violet eyed boy sighed contently in his sleep.

'I love you, too. I'll never leave you. Together... for... ever...' he thought as he drifted into sleep himself, 'for... ever.'



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