Storytime
Joyce W.
Based on an Italian fairytale whose name I forgot
"Daddy, tell me a story," said Fuyuka, dressed in pajamas that had little hearts and teddy bears on it. Even while sitting on the bed, she bounced about.
"OK," said Duo in his blue-striped pajama pants.
"But it has to be new."
Duo groaned. "I've told you every story I know."
"I want a new one!"
Duo thought, then said, "OK, this is the story of an evil princess named Relena."
"Evil?" someone said flatly.
Duo turned to see Heero standing in the doorway, looking amused. "It's my story and I'll tell it the way I want."
"She's not evil."
"Ok, how about stubborn, self-absorbed and demented?"
"Better."
"There was also a young prince named Heero and his knight in shining black armor named Duo." Duo smiled until he heard a snort of laughter escape from Heero. He turned around to say, "What's so funny? Do I interrupt you when you're telling a story?"
"Constantly," Heero replied drily.
"Then you know how annoying it is. Now go to bed; I'll be there to tell you a story soon. Just go!"
Heero sighed, then left the room.
"Well, Heero and Duo had met during the wars that had periodically swept the kingdoms of the land. Duo had just been a poor orphan boy when he became a soldier. With his magnificent skills with the crossbow and the longbow, he was soon promoted to the royal guard where he caught the eye of the prince. After executing a death-defying rescue of the prince from a guarded tower, he and the prince became inseparable."
A "Hn" was heard from the hallway.
Fuyuka giggled. This kind of arguing happened almost every time Daddy told a story.
"Now the princess Relena of Sanc Kingdom had seen Heero at the various tournaments. As he was quite handsome and won many of the matches, she became infatuated with him. She was a . . ."
Heero came in through the doorway with a chair. Duo turned and said, "What are you doing?"
"I want to hear the rest of this nonsensical story." He put down his chair next to Duo and sat next to him, their thighs and shoulders touching.
"As I was saying before I was interrupted, she was a pampered, spoiled girl who liked to do nothing but proclaim how important she was and have people flatter her. She had tried to invite him over to various balls, but he always refused. The last time, he'd gotten so irritated that he'd torn it into shreds and sent it back "
"Then Relena went to the Princess of Catalonia, Dorothy of the forked eyebrows, who was rumored to have dabbled in the black arts. 'Dorothy,' she said. 'With those witchy eyebrows, I'm sure that you can somehow get my beloved Heero to look in my way.'"
"Now Dorothy was very, very annoyed when people called her eyebrows 'witchy.' While she did have a few magical powers, she didn't like the way people assumed she was a, well, you know. Truly, she thought, I am misunderstood by everyone. But she hid that behind a smile and said, 'Relena-sama, I'm sorry to inform you that the man you love adores another.'"
"Relena scowled, 'Who can this trollop be?'"
"Dorothy's smile became even wider. 'The trollop is a guy named Duo Maxwell.'"
"She gasped, then said, 'Dorothy, you must make Heero adore me and forget all about this . . .' Then she waved her hand as if dismissing him."
"Dorothy was narrowed her eyes a little as she didn't like being ordered about, especially by the likes of Relena Peacecraft. 'I'm not one of your subjects, Relena-sama. I will fulfill your request only if you have something I would like.'"
"'How about some golden tweezers for those eyebrows?' said Relena, oblivious to anybody's feelings but her own."
"Dorothy thought, I must keep myself from whispering the few simple words it would take to turn this idiotic girl into a bat. 'No! That will not do! Relena . . .' Then by dint of sheer willpower, she added, 'Sama.'"
Heero's face was twitching as he was trying to keep from laughing out loud. Fuyuka had no reservations and rocked back and forth with giggles, especially since Duo had put his entire body into his telling of the story, even using the hideously disfigured Barbie doll that Fuyuka had tattooed up with a green marker and whose hair she had cut into a mohawk that was dyed blue as a stand-in for Relena. When asked why she had done that to her doll, she replied that she wanted a Punk warrior princess Barbie.
"Relena thought long and hard. 'I understand that your cousin likes pretty, elegant things. Perhaps something I have is pretty and elegant enough that you could give him.'"
"Dorothy smiled at that. 'Ah, a present for Treize! He has all the flowers and finery he'd ever want, but he dearly loves bishonen and biseinin.'"
"Relena handed her a picture album of all the men in her staff. Dorothy flipped through and cooed as she saw several cute fighters. Then she said, 'I'll take these two to serve Treize. In return, I'll have Heero eating out of the palm of your hand.'"
"'But what about Duo?'"
"'Do not worry, I have a plan for that as well.'"
"What kind of plan?" said Fuyuka.
"I'm getting to that, hold your horses. Dorothy then said, 'I'll weave a spell around one of your portraits so that the one you want will fall in love with you. As for your rival in love, I'll just set it up so that Duo just can't win. Don't worry your head about the details. Just remember to follow through on your end of the bargain.' "
"Relena nodded her head eagerly and sent forth the two chosen by Dorothy to serve Treize. Relena's portrait was sent to Heero and Heero instantly fell in love with it and decided to ask for her hand in marriage."
"What kind of story is this?" said Heero, glaring at him for real.
"Just wait!" said Duo. "It gets better." He patted his husband on the knee to reassure him. "Well, Duo thought this stinks of magic. His suspicions were confirmed when a letter came to him, sent by a raven. He took the letter and read the following:" "Dear Duo,
By now, you have probably figured out that Heero is under a magic spell. No matter what you say or do, he will not listen to a word you say. Not that he does when he's himself, but . . .
I've set up several traps for Heero Yuy. Now you can either walk away and let him suffer the consequences or save him. During the sea voyage towards Relena's palace, a beautiful fish with bejeweled scales will be caught. Its very touch is poisonous. If you want to prevent it from killing Heero, you must get if off the ship. However if you tell him, everything up to your knees will be turned to stone..
When he reaches the shore, he will immediately be offered a beautiful horse to ride to the palace. You must immediately cut its head off as it will turn into a serpent that will crush him to death once he saddles up. Everything to your waist will be turned to stone if you say a word.
The last trap is when you arrive at the castle. At around this time, Relena will offer him a beautiful coat. You must immediately rip it in half and stomp on it because if you don't, it will burst into flames once it's on him. She doesn't know about how lethal the coat is, by the way. Anyway, a word and you’ll be a statue.
However, a knight of your caliber should be able to handle this, but this will really make Heero mad. The problem is that by reading this letter, you can't tell him why you're doing all this because if you do, you'll turn into stone. If you don't tell him, I'm sure he'll kill you or send you away into exile.
You may ask why I don't kill you outright. Against the rules since magicians belong to the same union as James Bond villains. This letter will self-destruct in 10 seconds.
Sincerely, Dorothy, card-carrying member the local chapter of magician's guild #007."
"Duo sighed as the letter evaporated in a poof of smoke. So basically I'm being set up, he thought. But it's better than letting him die.' Then he shook his head in exasperation."
"A week later, he went with Heero on the ship and they sailed across the sea separating the two kingdoms. Several of the sailors on break began fishing for a meal. Duo, remembering the letter, took out his double crossbow and put the bolts into place."
"One of the sailors suddenly yelled, 'Prince Heero, look at this beautiful fi. . .' On his line was a beautiful fish that dazzled with scales that acted like prisms in the sunlight. It was three feet long with fins like delicate fans and whiskers like a cat. But before the sailor finish his sentence, a crossbolt snapped the line in two, then another quickly followed that piercing the fish through its heart. It fell back into the water, bleeding. Nobody noticed this but as the drops of blood hit the ship, they sizzled on contact with the wood."
"The sailors were furious at Duo, saying, 'Why did you do that?''"
"Heero turned to the other men and said, 'I'm sure he has a good reason for shooting it. I trust him with my life.'"
"The voyage was quiet though because Duo was trying hard to not to say anything because he figured that he was the only one who could do the job right. Damn, he thought, I'm saving him so he can get married to someone else. I even called on my old pal Professor G at the Institute of Magical technology and he flipped through the entire Encyclopedia Magica with his nose. All he could only tell me was that true love breaks spells. If so then why hasn't the spell broken already, I . . . "
"By the time they got to the port, Duo was in a dark mood. They could tell because he was dressed all in black as if he was in mourning. He was wearing a sword and carrying his crossbow. He waited for the next trap to come. It came soon enough. A beautiful chestnut horse was led by a young man. He said, 'I see that you are travelers who appreciate the finer things in life. Perhaps you would like to buy this horse.' And it was a magnificent horse, standing quietly. However, Duo wasn't taking any chances. He took out his sword and promptly cut its head off."
"Everybody looked aghast at what he'd done. 'What is this?' growled Heero."
"’Duo said, 'I know it sounds corny, but you got to trust me on this one.’"
"'Can't you tell me why?'"
"'Maybe once we reach the castle. Just wait a little longer.'"
"While the party left the port, Duo thought to himself, Is this just a trick to make me look irrational? Suppose all those things were perfectly safe. Chikusho! They ended up buying horses elsewhere, but now everyone was looking at him quite strangely."
"But moments after they left, the illusion was lifted and the remains of the horse was revealed to be the dead carcass of a most vile serpent."
"Throughout the ride to the princess' castle, Heero glanced at the abnormally quiet Duo and kept wanting to ask him what was wrong with him, but said nothing. What's wrong with me, he thought. Why do I feel this way? Just a few days ago, I . . . it just keeps slipping my mind. I know I'm forgetting something, a promise I made. 'Duo?'"
"Duo turned to him and said, 'Yes?'"
"Heero closed his eyes and said, 'I know I'm forgetting something, but I don't know what it could be. Could you tell me what it is?'"
“Duo turned to him and said, ‘Come here and I’ll show you.’ With that, he stopped his horse and let Heero ride up next to him. He reached out to touch his face, then leaned forward with his eyes closed. Then he felt Heero’s fingers over his mouth.”
“Duo opened his eyes to see Heero’s eyes, cold and unfeeling. ‘Dont,’ Heero said, who then rode off ahead of him.”
“Once, they arrived at the castle, Duo followed Heero, his heart heavy, knowing that the last trap was coming. At least the end is near, he thought as they walked into the princess’ court.”
“Duo saw the coat and immediately ripped it from Relena’s hands and ripped it in half and stomped on it until it was unwearable. When he looked up, he saw Heero glaring and pointing his sword at him. He stood up slowly and stared back at Heero, his eyes full of anger, disappointment and pain.” “’Years of being with you means nothing more than a damn coat?’ Duo closed his eyes and clenched his fists. ‘Then just kill me!”
“The sword didn’t waver but neither did it move. ‘Why all of this?’ yelled Heero. ‘Killing, destroying things like a madman?’”
“Duo said, ‘It was all in a letter I was sent by Dorothy, Princess of Catalonia. I was told that the fish was poisonous, but that if I were to tell you, I’d be turned to stone up to my knees.’ With that statement, he was turned to stone up to his knees as he foretold.”
“The room became very quiet and there was a heard a very small sound like ice cracking. Heero stumbled as if disoriented and said, ‘What’s this pain I feel?’”
“Duo saw the confusion on his face and guessed that the spell that had wrapped around Heero’s heart was breaking. Then he told about what the horse would’ve turned into if he’d ridden it. With that, he turned to stone up to his waist. There was another snap as the spell broke even further. Heero yelled, ‘Stop! Don’t say anymore, I believe you!’”
“Suddenly, the remains of the coat began to smoke and spontaneously caught on fire. Heero looked at that then looked back at Duo. ‘And as for the coat.’”
"Heero dropped his sword and ran up to him and tried to shut him the way he'd always done, he placed his lips over those of Duo's, but it was too late, those lips were cold and hard. Duo had turned to stone, but the spell over Heero was destroyed."
"Relena looked at all that had transpired and picked up her magical cellphone and called Dorothy, 'What is the meaning of this? This was not what I wanted to happen! I didn't ask for him to be turned to stone!'"
"The voice at the other end said, 'Relena-sama, as long as he was around, the spell was in danger of failing. I was hoping that Heero would've killed him or sent him away by now, but I guess that it was doomed to fail . . ."
"’And why is that?’ yelled Relena.”
"’Because true love trumps these kind of spells.’"
"’True love?’ said Relena when she felt a hand touch her shoulder."
"She turned around to see Heero Yuy looking at her very coldly. 'Who are you talking to?'"
"Overcome with remorse and fear, she then commenced to blab everything she knew including the location of the Princess of Catalonia. Upon learning the location of the magician responsible for this catastrophe, he immediately left the castle and rode non-stop to Dorothy's castle. Once there, he stormed his way in, nobody daring to face the best fencer of the kingdom of L1, especially when enraged. Dorothy, however, showed no fear and was there to greet him, fencing sword in one hand and a mask in the other."
"Heero said, 'Tell me how to free Duo or I'll kill you.'"
"Dorothy smiled with admiration at Heero. 'Such a fiery young man. If you want to save your friend, then you must duel with me and show how much you desire his salvation."
"Dorothy proved to be a worthy opponent, actually managing to wound Heero, but Heero won by piercing her fencing mask without killing her. 'Now you must tell me what I need to know.'"
"Dorothy took off her mask and sighed, 'It's so beautiful when someone fights in the name of true love. It makes the world a bit brighter. I will tell you what you need to know. You must spill your heart's blood unto the statue. Once you have done so, you will break the spell.' With that, she waved her sword which turned into a wand and she flew off in a chariot drawn by flying dragons to stay at her cousin's house until the entire mess could be sorted without her getting skewered."
"Heero immediately rode back to the ship and ran to his room where the statue was. Rash and extreme as ever . . . Ow!"
The exclamation of pain wasn't part of the story. Heero had given him a pinch on the elbow.
"The prince pulled out his dagger and stabbed himself in the chest. He quickly lost consciousness from blood loss and the blood splattered upon the stone statue."
"When Heero woke up, Duo was standing over him, completely free of the evil spell. Heero looked down to see that the stab wound he'd inflicted on himself had disappeared. Duo explained, 'Your fairy godmother Sally came by and cured you. She apologized for not coming earlier and fixing the mess sooner but she said that she had to rescue two prisoners in Treize's dungeon. She only managed to get one out because the other didn't want to leave. I asked her why you had to stab yourself like that and she said that you only had to give yourself a little cut not put a dagger through your chest. Don't you ever put me through this kind of hell again, you baka!"
"Heero got up from the bed and held him tightly, saying, 'I will never do anything like this again, any of it.' The very next day, they were married."
Heero tugged on Duo's braid gently and whispered in his ear. "Wrap it up!"
"As for Relena, she was deposed as she was a terrible queen and was sent far, far away so she could no longer bother people. As for Dorothy, she was eventually defeated by the combined forces of King Quatre and King Trowa and repented of her ways and stopped practicing magic. As for Treize and his remaining prisoner, they lived happily ever after. Now I've got to go tell Dad a story or he'll get cranky. You don't want to see him cranky, do you?" Duo said to Fuyuka.
Fuyuka threw the covers over her head and went to sleep.
Duo turned out the light, shut her door and they both walked over to their bedroom. "That was a very silly story," Heero said. "Having me engaged to her, hmph!"
"Well then, what kind of story do you want me to tell you?" Duo said once they were in bed and the lights were turned down low.
Heero's response was to lick the end of his nose, then give him a tender open-mouthed kiss. "Let your hands do the talking," Heero whispered in his ear while unraveling his braid and tugging Duo's pajama pants off. And not another word was said that night.
The End
