I am NOT Gay!
"I am NOT gay!" Duo ranted as he paced back and forth across the small room.
Wufei grunted. Watching his friend pace was making him dizzy.
"I mean, I don't even LIKE guys!" Duo said, turning to face the Chinese boy. "I LIKE girls! I've dated enough of them to know..."
"And bedded enough, I bet," Wufei muttered, but Duo wasn't listening. Wufei sighed, resigning himself to being the audience of yet another of Shinigami's rants.
"I mean, take for example, Relena. She's hot, she'd look even hotter if she wore her hair in pigtails and dressed in a Catholic school girl outfit like that Britney Spears chick," at this Wufei nearly gagged. Duo thought Relena was hot? As in sexy? The Shenlong pilot scooted off the bed and walked over to Duo, placing his hand on the boy's forehead. "What the fuck?"
"I was just checking to see if you were ill. I guess not..." Duo glared at him, so he shrugged and sat back down.
Duo raised an eyebrow as in asking if he could continue. Wufei gestured for him to resume.
"If I were gay do you think I'd think that?"
"Maybe... gay guys have a wonderful appreciation for beauty."
Duo's jaw nearly hit the floor, but he recovered, shaking it off. "Ok, well wouldn't I think that Quatre, Trowa, or yourself was cute?"
Wufei shrugged. "Your preference."
Duo was getting irritated. "Fact is none of you do anything for me! No, I get off looking at pics of naked chicks all oiled up and ready to play with your package just to please you... I think that Relena and Dorothy have great bods and would look even better with slightly different hairstyles laid out on a beach in g-string bikinis that barely cover anything. I don't like guys like that. I could never look at a guy in a thong speedo and think 'Oh man, nice ass, but man is his package below my standards.' But... but..."
"It's not the same with him is it?" Wufei asked, eyes knowing and sympathetic.
"No, it's not. It's not just that he turns me on and that I feel like my heart is going to beat itself to death inside my chest when I'm around him... it's... it's... I dunno, something deep," Duo said, sighing sadly. "I mean, if I were gay I'd know why... I'd be because he's got beautiful, silky hair, gorgeous eyes and a golden tanned bod... Hell, it's those things now! But it's just... different. Not just those things."
Wufei stood and put his arms around his friend's shoulders. "You love him..." He paused. "He's strong. He's beautiful. He's everything you wish you could be. He's the soul you were fated to meet, only fate played a cruel joke on you and placed that soul into a body the same gender as yours. He's your soul-mate. Don't let that pass you by just 'cause he's the same gender as you."
"Gee, Fei, when'd you get so deep? Huh?" Duo said, nudging his friend in the ribs.
"I've got one hell of a smart lover..." is all he said.
"Thanks, Fei..." Duo said, turning to leave. He stopped at the door looking back. "I'm still NOT gay."
Wufei just smirked. "I know. I know."
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