Today
Today was the last day of camping. It was fairly boring. I woke up since it was so hot. It was very early for me, 9:30. Everyone was up of course since everyone always wakes up way too early. I sat around a bit. Thinking mostly. About mabe getting a car and about my bf. I haven't seen him for ages since I'm not currently at home. We took the boat to the far beach which is no better then the close one. My dad even found a leach. So yes I went to the bathroom and some person was taking a crap. Oh joy was that disgusting. I left and waited for them to leave. Then we rode in the box of the truck back to the campsite and dropped of my cousin and her foster brother(My aunt does fostering). Then we drove back to my families house. I wanted to go see my horse but I didn't get to. Tomorrow perhaps. My sister was sick all day today, and still is. She had a sip of my beer. Which was stupid. Every time she has any alcohol she's sick the next day. But she continues. Well we ate supper which was pretty good and I edited this thing. I also made tentative plans for a party. I hope they work out.

Now for some info about me. Well I am 14. My sign is Aquarius. I'm a female. You don't need to know my name because I'll tell you something else. I am a bisexual. The thing is I don't openly check out chicks and I don't hit on them. I also haven't told anyone. So if I put my name here they could easily find out(friends and such). THey wouldn't like me any less. THey would treat me different though. I don't like getting treated differently. I mean it's enough having to live with it, but if that effected my friendships I don't know what I would do. Moving on. My parents are divorced and they fight frequently. Money situation isn't the greatest but will hopefully improve. My sister wants me out of her life. My bird died. My dog got given away. My boyfriend is a couple provinces away as are my friends. My mom wants to send me to live with someone else. I have no friends except 2 that actually go to my school which is fine except I am a target for rumours. This isn't even everything. But excuse enough to be so messed up. I'm not quite depressed not always. I can be very happy. I'm not quite goth. I'm more me. I wear clothes I make myself and not all are black. I make my own jewlery. I do buy some tho. earrings mostly. and rings. Which I seem to have misplaced. I'm going into grade 9. My grampa had a heartattack and I just saw him for the first time in several years.

Now for beliefs. I believe that being bisexual isn't a good thing. Which makes it hard to live with. I don't mean it's wrong. I think gay guys are the best. Notice I didn't say chicks? That is cause there are some people, like a friend of mine, who hit on you and want to do things like kiss and it isn't always easy to decline. I have tho which is definitly good. I also believe that love is the best thing in the world. If you could live on it that would be even more amazing. I haven't even been in love only infatuated and that alone is undescribable.I also believe my life is crap, but if I end it life will only get worse. I believe in God, and I believe he is the cause of everything good in my life. I believe there is a devil, and that he causes your evil thoughts. I also believe God is stronger then the Devil but doesn't involve his power in people's lives so much, he gives them choice which is why so many people are bad because the devil does like to be an influence. I believe I am slowly falling in love for my bf. Which would be good but I am afraid to love. I've been hurt so much. I had a bf who cheated on me a whole year and i didnt break up with him until he made out with my best friend. I believe music effects your subconscious and depending on how you react it can make you happy sad angry excited or just calm you down. But I'll share more tomorrow this is very long.