chapter five
Oprah was talking to me from the TV in my bedroom as I brushed my hair in front of the mirror. I never understood the pansies that went on that show to discuss their 'problems'. This particular episode was about fathers bonding with their children and the emotional stress they both undergo to keep that relationship healthy. What a load of bull. My father was and still is a prick to me and look how I turned out. Oh, maybe now I see that point to that show.
I mean really, I don't think fathers have that much of an affect on the person you grow up to be. Look at Cain. His father left his mother when him and Able were just babies. He never knew who his father was and he grew up fine. A little bitter but fine none the less.
Try as I might, I could not get my hair under control. There was this one little wave in it that I couldn't get out for the life of me and it was pissing me off to no end. I tried hair spray, moose, gel, and a blow dryer. That all resulted in nothing but giving me very brittle hair.
I walked in the bathroom and stuck my head under the sink to wash all the foreign goop out of my hair. About two hours had gone to waste on it already and I wasn't about to screw it up now.
Pulling my head out from the water I quickly wrapped a towel around it and ran back into my bedroom. Water was escaping from under the towel and running down my bare back giving me the chills. Thank God I had remembered to take my good shirt off before I started.
Okay hair, this is war!
With a blow dryer in one hand and a brush in the other, I quickly began the work of untangling my head and drying to perfection. It had to be absolutely masterful for my date with Cain.
A long 20 minutes later, my hair was back to it's normal, poofy self. Sometimes I don't know why I ever bother.
Cleaning the many strands of long blonde hair out of my brush, I got dressed and picked up a new bottle of cologne that my mother bought me a while ago. I had never tried it so this was going to be an experiment.
After spraying it on my neck I quickly learned that one sprits was all I needed to knock out a large herd of rhinos. The stuff was so strong that I started to gag shortly after it soaked into my skin. I needed to get it off, and fast!
My eyes searched the room frantically looking for a cure to magically take the smell off my neck that didn't require showering. Nothing practical was popping out at me so I had to turn to the place I was dreading going to the most. My eyes fell on that lone issue of Cosmo magazine I had bought a couple months ago. I only had interest in it for the sex tips but still it was here and it might provide some answers.
My fingers turned pages faster than I knew they could as I searched for a cure to this stench. I found the answer on page 22 in the form of an Ask Alice type question and answer deal. The write in described a female putting on way too much perfume and Ask Alice (or Zaza in this case) told her to rub sheer stick deodorant on the infected area. Sheer stick? What the hell did that mean?
The night stand drawer was host to some three odd sticks of half used Old Spice deodorant sticks. Well, it would either be the good Mr. Spice or nothing at all. I grabbed one of the sticks and started rubbing on my neck, careful not to go overboard. It burned over the spots I had most recently shaven, making me want to jump in the shower yet again. My strong will power coaxed me to resist the urge and just suck it up like a man. I wonder if women go through this much trouble before dates. I'm willing to bet that they go through more than the normal male, but not as much as I do. I've never claimed to be the normal male.
Well, Zaza is truly a genius and now my neck doesn't smell. I should write into the magazine to thank them and tell them to give Zaza a pay raise. I would have to change my name to a more feminine one, seeing as I wouldn't be caught dead writing into one of those magazines. It might bruise my fragile ego.
I walked over to the mirror and gave myself the once over. Not bad, not bad. I've looked a hell of a lot worse in my day so I can't complain. It took me a long amount of painstaking time to come up with an outfit for the occasion, but I think the one I ended up wearing suited me nicely. I decided on a white button down shirt with large, faded blue checkers to put on top of a plain white undershirt, and classic Calvin Klien jeans. All in all, I think it was a good choice.
Now to get to the restaurant in time. That was the true challenge. I had wasted so much time on my appearance that time seemed to have slipped away and now it was ten minutes till I was supposed to meet him. The place was about 20 minutes away so I was basically screwed.
About a half hour later I stood in the main lobby of one of the middle class restaurants downtown. My car had stalled getting it to start and once I finally got to leave, I was backed up for a short bit in traffic. Some days I rally hate my life.
The waiters there were giving me funny looks as I asked for our reservation that I had made myself. It turns out that Cain hadn't arrived yet and it looked to them like I had been stood up. Damn restaurant people and their assuming ways. He wouldn't stand me up. That totally wasn't in his nature.
But then again, I didn't know him anymore did I? He might have changed character completely and I just failed to notice. What if he turned into a complete asshole who stood up people on dates and just made them show up to show them their own stupidity. That would suck!
No, he totally wouldn't stand me up. If he's anything like the guy he used to be then he would rather shoot himself then make someone else unhappy.
Ten minutes had passed since I had arrived and I was beginning to lose hope in him. Luckily just at the time I was watching the door, Cain stumbled in. He looked a tid bit flustered but gorgeous none the less. The wind must have been blowing because his cheeks were rosy and hair tousled. As soon as he saw me he rushed forward and gave me a huge hug.
"Hey! I am sooooooo sorry that I'm late! Able was still getting ready for work and seeing that we only have one car between the two of us I had to wait for him to get ready and drop me off."
I hugged him back and noticed how my arm fit perfectly around the small of his back. Holding him gave me a fuzzy nostalgic feeling that made me grin. It was almost like he belonged to me again.
"Oh, that's all right. The waiters were just giving me funny looks though. Damn them."
He laughed.
"Oh, they all probably just want you. I know I do." he laughed some more and put his arm around me, leading me to a table without the help of a waiter. Oh how bold of him.
I rushed over and pulled out the chair for him and he sat down, shaking his head at me and laughing. I then went over and sat across from him. I guess he had never heard of chivalry then. The man always does everything for his woman.
The waiter came over soon after we were situated and handed us menus, also asking for our drink orders. He had Coke and I Sprite. I normally would have ordered something alcoholic but I didn't want to come off as one to him. We'd save that for later.
"So many choices, eh?" he commented while thumbing through the menu. I nodded in agreement as I absentmindedly stared at the open page. His leg was brushing up against mine but I don't think it was intentional, yet still had the potential to be. My flirting tactics were starting to kick in again and I hoped his were too. This should prove to be an interesting afternoon.
"Yeah, my head is spinning from the options."
He laughed and I noticed a beam of light reflect off of something in his mouth. This startled me so I leaned over across the table to him and stuck a fork on his tongue, pressing down to make him open his mouth. When he did a small, silver stud was revealed to me.
"Woah, when did you get that?" I asked, taking my seat back in astonishment.
"Oh, a couple years ago when I started working at the parlor. I got inspired one day and did it myself. Hurt like a bitch but I think it's worth it." He shrugged and kept reading the menu. I continued to stare at him in disbelief.
"You do know what they say about boys with tongue rings don't you?" I asked him.
"No, why don't you tell me." he said back to me with a smirk that basically told me that he really did know, he just wanted to be a tease. I smirked back at him.
"Oh, they just say that there is only one good use for them. You know, little silver balls can have very dramatic effects on certain parts of the body."
I gave him a sly look as he just looked down and smirked. I know he knew exactly what I meant.
You know, when I looked at him for a while I started to notice all the things that had physically changed on him since I'd seen him last. He had filled out a bit and was no longer the skinny little boy I once knew but a fine looking man with a nice build. He wore his hair a little more messy and longer, but still with the same adorable curls to it. He also had a little facial hair on his chin and dressed a little bit older. He really had grown up.
Thinking about this I started to wonder how he saw me. I wonder if to him I looked like an alcoholic that had been 'around the block' quite a number of times. Well, that was pretty much true but I really didn't want him to know. I fear that if he did know that side of me he would hold back and not want to start getting close to me again. I couldn't have that so he just simply couldn't know. What he doesn't know can't hurt him.
By now our waiter had came and gone with our orders. Cain was fidgeting in his seat and I realized that I had zoned out staring at him. It must have been making him uncomfortable so I quickly averted my eyes in the other direction.
A long silence had passed over before either of us spoke. He was first to interrupt that gap.
"So how many boyfriends have you had since I've last seen you?" he asked. He was sitting on his hands with his feet placed on the floor, right knee bouncing in time the restaurant's music. That seemed like a rather bold question that he wouldn't normal ask so it caught me off guard. I had to think of a discreet answer and fast.
"Um, not really any boyfriends, just...er...friends with benefits?" That was the only reasonable response I could think of in a slipped second. I hope that didn't make me seem like a whore. "Why," I added, "how many have you had?"
"Oh, not many at all." he gave to me with a coy look. "Why, you want to change that?"
I almost blushed for some reason. With all the experience i've had that makes me blush?! It was so grade school it was almost pathetic. Yet I couldn't ignore the feeling of overwhelming joy and warmness the thought gave me. I needed Cain so much.
The realization hit me that all the sex and alcohol and denial and my whole lifestyle was made to fill the empty space that Cain once occupied. He was the thing in life that kept me going as a normal healthy human and without him I...well, went off the deep end.
This shock left me dazed for a minute. When I came back to my senses and looked over at him, I saw his chocolate brown eyes gazing back at me and knew I had to make him part of me again. Deep down I still loved him. I knew that I always have and I always would and if I didn't act on it I would be killing us both.
He was still watching me, waiting intently for my reply. He then smiled, the most genuine and sincere smile anyone has ever given me. It was so sweet I wanted to cry. My own lips softened and curled upwards to form a smile back at him.
"Oh Cain," I said while taking his hand from across the table. He was shaking a bit so I took my other hand and placed it over his to calm him. "Of course I would.""
He beamed at me and this time it was his turn to blush. My heart melted for him again, right then and there.
He nodded and let go. He had a glowing satisfaction and I could tell that he was just as happy as I was to get back together after all these years. This time I'm never letting him get away from me. Never.
All during this time I got the sinking feeling that we were being watched. As I scanned the area one thing became very noticeable to me. It was a pair of sinister dark blue eyes, following our every movement.
