Day One Hundred Sixty Two: Eye Contact Day
Now Playing: Cartman: 'Help! Hippies all around me!'
"Make prolonged eye contact with everyone you meet."

There's that. Or, because I feel really bad about slacking so much (and because I just learned how to correctly use the film feature of my camera), I present real live Andy eye contact with YOU. Edit: Or I would if it WOULD WORK. Remind me to keep working on this.

Next, Day One Hundred Sixty Three: Shoplifting Day.

Day One Hundred Sixty One: Public Poetry Day
Now Playing: Mr. Garrison writing the Great American Romance Novel
I'm still alive!

"Compose a poem and leave it in a public place to brighten up someone's day."

My website is as public as it can get! Listed on Yahoo! and everything!

Next up, Day One Hundred Sixty Two... Eye Contact Day!

Day One Hundred Sixty: Mirrors Day
Now Playing: Turd Fergeson
"Today avoid all mirrors. Concrentrate on your inner beauty."

While I'm sure I'm full of inner beauty, I do have to check my hair regularly in the mirror to make sure it's not TOO out of control. I lose.

Next, Day One Hundred Sixty One... Public Poetry Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Nine: Gardening Day
Now Playing: Naaaature Goulet
"Find a way of making a $10 bill grow into $100 in one day."

Sadly, I'd need a $10 bill for this. And I don't get paid for another 40 minutes. So sad.

Next, Day One Hundred Sixty... Mirrors Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Eight: Ten Commandments Day
Now Playing: The Coconut Bangers Ball: It's A Rap! (little inside, I know)
"Today, break one or several of the Ten Commandments."

Let's see, which Commandment might I have broken today. Got it! Numero Dos, "You shall not make for yourself an idol." At work Lil' Jon is our new official idol. All hail the man and his crunk juice.

Hu-whaaaaat? Ooooooookay!

And also Robert Goulet. He's my idol.

Tomorrow, Day One Hundred Fifty Nine... Gardening Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Seven: Human Chess Day
Now Playing: Who's that Spartan in my teepee?
"Today behave as if you were playing chess. "

That's a little difficult. But if I had to be a chess piece, I'd be the rook, described as "the strong trustworthy type."

On a related note, on TV right now are the Spartan cheerleaders at a chess meet. Bobby Fisher, where is he? I don't know, I don't know.

Next, we're gettin' all holy up in the hizzouse with Day One Hundred Fifty Eight... Ten Commandments Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Six:
Now Playing: I gotta have more cowbell!
"Today, redesign an everyday product."

Naturally, I've done just that. Take one TV. Take one wolf hat. Put 'em together, and what a fine lookin' everyday product.

Tomorrow, Day One Hundred Fifty Seven... Human Chess Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Five: Confessional Day
Now Playing: Marty & Bobbi Culp
"Confess to a priest."

I have no priest, but here's a confession. I admit it... I have an addiction. My name is Andy and I am addicted. Addicted to the "Best of Will Ferrell" DVD. I'm not the only person with this issue. Others should reply and confess to your addiction as well.

Tomorrow, Day One Hundred Fifty Six... Everyday Product Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Four: Hard Work Day
"Hard work is good for the soul, besides being the basis of Western society's economic dominance. Follow these instructions to make sure you earn your money today."

Alright, my work day.

CLOCK IN TIME: 8:00 a.m. EST
CLOCK OUT TIME: 5:30 p.m. EST
STATEMENT OF PURPOSE: Today I will work harder than ever and make it happen. Signature: Andy

LIST OF TASKS / PRIORITY / ACTION / DEADLINE / RESULTS:
* Count morning drawers / somewhat important / count money / 9 a.m. / done
* Make change order / very important / take money out of drawers for change / 10 a.m. / done
* Do bonus calculation / very important / call former area coordinator and beg for help / noon Saturday / in progress
* Fill tables and endcaps / eh / like it says / in progress
* Set up back room for shipment / somewhat / 11:15 a.m. Saturday / done
* Count drawers / important / duh / 5:30 p.m. / done
* Take deposit to the bank / very very important / get coworker, go to bank / by dark / done

I win.

Tomorrow, Day One Hundred Fifty Five... Confession Day!

Day One Hundred Fifty Three: Planet Day
Now Playing: Perhaps you've heard of me, I've got a sneaker for a hand
"Talk to a plant for at least one hour."

No. :)

Next, it's Day One Hundred Fifty Four... Hard Work Day!