In less than twelve hours they would be home. Once they were on the road Angel
would push the limits of the posted speed and the car to cover the miles as
quickly as possible. In Sunnydale Buffy would be pushed aside again in his refusal
to allow her to make decisions regarding her life and his jealousy to share
her with Spike. It was the only thing that made any sense to her because Angel
had only spoken to her when it was absolutely necessary since she had blown
up at them the day before.
Buffy was stalling as much as possible to delay the time when she would have to be separated from them. That was something else that she had come to accept. It was not only Angel she didn’t want to be separated from but Spike also. At least the fun loving gentle side of Spike that she had gotten to know on the trip and not the homicidal evil vampire that she knew he still was inside.
She had lounged around the room all day only going out to pick up their blood and lunch for herself. Neither of them had been overly happy about her constant presence and she figured that was because they couldn’t have sex. But she kept hoping that Angel would make some gesture or at least attempt to talk to her but he had remained in a brooding silence that even Spike couldn’t cajole him from.
Angel was in the other room packing his bag while she was putting her make up on. In another moment of defiance she had left her shirt off and wearing only her slacks and bra as she moved from one room to the other. Spike had only watched her with hooded eyes while Angel had refused to look at her at all. It made her want to attack his wall with a sledge hammer just to get some sort of reaction from him.
“Okay, if I come in and get our stuff,” Spike asked as he stood in the open door way of the bathroom. When Buffy shrugged he moved in behind her then leaned into the shower and started to pull out their shampoos and various other sundries. “It’s amazing how many hair products three people can use. Want me to throw your stuff in your bag?”
“Thanks.” Buffy turned slightly to look at him noting the nervousness in his eyes. He looked from her to where Angel was waiting for him to return. “I’ll hurry.”
Spike nodded and left her. Buffy hurried through the rest of her makeup and decided to leave her hair wet. She wanted Angel to react not be angry and if Spike was nervous then it would be bad. Quickly dumping the rest of her stuff in the bag she grabbed her blouse and pulled it round her shoulders.
“Why not just go like that since you want the attention it would bring?”
“It’s only yours that I want,” Buffy whispered.
“And Spike’s.”
“Fuck you, Angel.”
She never saw it coming because it was something that she never thought would happen and when she found herself lying on the floor holding her cheek all she could feel was shock. Angel, her gentle Angel, had just slapped her. Something in her head told her to stay down and not get back up.
“Angel, don’t,” Spike protested. “She doesn’t understand.”
“Shut up, boy.”
But Buffy did understand but she wasn’t a vampire and as far as she was concerned she wasn’t going to be treated like this ever again. With a deep breath she kept her head bowed and stayed on the ground, “Angel, would you, please, ask Spike to leave us alone?”
It was as subservient as she was going to go.
“Leave us, Childe.”
Buffy stayed on the floor as Spike hurried toward the door but through the curtain of her hair she saw him hesitate and turn as if to check on her before he went through the door and closed it behind him.
As soon as they were alone Buffy came flying up, “How dare you? The other night when you threw me from the car was bad enough but to slap me. I don’t think so.”
Angel’s face was wracked with guilt. It had come out of him without him even realizing it. A part of Angelus that still lingered inside of him despite the soul but he knew he couldn’t use that excuse as he looked at the mark that still marred her beautiful face.
“I’m sorry.”
Buffy softened at his remorseful tone. “You’re not going to get me to obey you with violence, Angel. I understand why you did it but it’s not going to happen again.”
“If you understood then why did you push me to do it? Did you want to see how far you could go? You never used to be like this. What happened?”
“I stood up for myself or is that what you don’t like. Do you only like them like Drusilla, all broken and doe eyed looking for Daddy. You’re not my sire. I’m not a vampire. Don’t treat me like one.”
“I am and so is Spike or did you forget that in your little fantasy of us playing house?”
“You are the one that wanted it.” She stopped as she looked around the room and tried to stop the tears that were threatening to fall. “I love you so much and I just want to be with you.”
“I made a mistake. This was all a mistake.” Angel whispered as he went to sit on the edge of the bed. “I wanted it to be true so much and I know now that I should never have even attempted this relationship with the three of us.”
“You’re just going to give up on us?” When he didn’t answer the tears did start to fall. “How can you be so cruel? How can you just play with my emotions like this? God, what kind of monster are you?”
“The kind you don’t want to know.”
“Damn you. You promised that you would let me make my own decisions about my life. I want this. I want to belong to you.”
“No, you don’t want to belong to me,” Angel snapped as he stood again. “You want a nice little convenient relationship that you can play at and skip home to Mommy when it suits you.”
“Don’t even blame this on me. It was all fine until you realized that I wouldn’t just be submitting to Spike. You got jealous and then you got pissed when I stood up to you. I’m not the submissive innocent little girl that you wanted me to be and you can’t handle it.”
“You’re right I can’t. That’s why when we get back to Sunnydale you are going home to your mother and we won’t see each other anymore.”
“Fine, we don’t have to but I still want to see Spike. I like him and it seems he needs some friends to help him adjust to everything.”
Angel smirked. “He won’t see you because I won’t allow it.”
Buffy turned cold inside as she looked at the hint of how cruel Angel’s alter ego could be. If her Angel could be this callous with a soul she really never wanted to see him without one.
“I’ll give him a choice. He needs protection and as the Slayer I can offer him that.”
“You only want one thing from him. I don’t blame you Spike is one of the best lovers I have ever had,” Angel sneered even as he walked to the door and opened it. “Spike, come in here.”
“What are you doing?” Buffy stammered.
“Giving you what you want. Consider it a good-bye present.” By this time Spike had returned to the room glancing from the tear stained cheeks of the Slayer to the raging pain of his Sire’s. “You have an hour. Fuck her and make sure it’s good for her. It will be the last contact the two of you have because I will take Buffy to the bus station to get home. Spike, be ready to go when I get back.” Then he walked out the door leaving them alone.
“What the hell did you do to him, Slayer?”
“Nothing, I don’t know, I was just trying to get him to change his mind and he took it the wrong way and then I got pissed and I told him I’d protect you and that’s when he invited you in here and now he’s gone and it’s over,” Buffy tumbled out before burying her face in her hands as sobs wracked her body.
“You were probably better off staying in Daytona, Love, seems all we’ve done is make you cry,” Spike soothingly told her as he knelt in front of her pulling her into his arms. He ran his hands up and down her back as he let her cry it out.
“What happened? I don’t understand.” Buffy asked as she pulled back from Spike. “He was never like this before.”
“You’ve both changed and you’re both facing the reality of who the other one really is. You shouldn’t push him so much with the ultimatums and trying to tell him what to do.”
“What is it with the two of you? I’m not allowed to say what I’m feeling and what I want.”
Spike laughed before sitting back on his heels and held her hands in his.
“Do you really want to be with him?”
“Yes, of course, I wouldn’t be going through all this if I didn’t. I love him so much, Spike.”
“Even enough to take me too?”
She nodded slowly.
“Yeah, and I guess it doesn’t hurt that I get your panties soaked, huh?”
“God, Spike.” Buffy wrinkled her nose but there was the trace of a grin on her face from his crude remark. Then she realized that was what he was trying to do was cheer her up. “Thanks.”
“No problem. That’s what I am here to do is to please.”
“Don’t you hate being treated like that?”
Spike shrugged and bowed his head.
“Buffy, you’ve never known Angelus. Angel is a pussy cat compared to him.” He looked up at her. “It’s not really about dominating me like he used to. It’s about respect for his position. It’s like your mum. You respect her and even though you don’t like what she tells you to do you know most of the time it’s for your own good so you do what she wants. He’s responsible for us. It’s up to him to make sure that we are sheltered, fed and taken care of. In return we listen to him.”
“I don’t want to be dependent on anyone again.”
Spike reached out to take her hands in his. “Angel is not only a vampire that will be heading up the family but will also be the alpha male. It’s not about being dependent but about position. If you can’t give him that right then it will never work.”
“Does he ever hit you?” Her trembling hand cupped his cheek softly.
“Not Angel. I never give him reason to.”
“I didn’t deserve to be slapped.”
“I told you from the beginning that if you can’t accept all of him then don’t even try.” His hand played absently with her hair. “But, no, you didn’t deserve it, pet.”
“I just wish that things could be the way I wanted them before I ran away.” Buffy sighed and ran her hands over her face.
“Not going to happen.”
Buffy looked up at him with eyes filled with tears and trembling lips. She watched as his features softened in compassion and he rocked forward toward her. He was there, so close, that her breathe was caressing his face and she became fixated on his lips. The curves, the slight pout of the lower one and she wanted the comfort of them. A swallow before she leaned forward to kiss him. Relief was her last thought as he pulled her forward and then he was cradled between her legs and within her arms and she felt safe again as his mouth moved over hers. His hair was soft as her fingers grabbed hold of his locks to keep him where he was. Just for a minute she needed to feel something besides pain and this was anything but. She opened her mouth and his tongue darted in as if he had been waiting for an invitation. The kiss lasted as long as she could go without air and with reluctance she released him.
“So, what is it going to be? Do we fuck or do I go find Angel and see if I can calm him down?”
And she knew it was partially a joke to jar her back to the reality of their situation and the vampire that held the fate of their future in his hands.
“Find Angel, calm him down and then we fuck.” Buffy answered as her eyes danced in mirth as she let him know in the same manner that she could deal even if she didn’t want to.
Spike couldn’t help but throw his head back and laugh. “I think I might like you after all.”
~~~~~~~~
The whiskey was soothing as it flowed down his throat easing his mood somewhat. After placing the glass on the table again his gaze returned to his hands. Slapping Buffy was one of the all time lows of his life as far as he was concerned. Of course it in no way compared to the things he had done as Angelus but since the soul, it was a definite low. Leaving her alone with Spike and telling them to have sex was tearing at him as he wondered if they had accepted his invitation.
Spike slid into the seat across from him and he glanced up at him.
“Was it as good as you expected?’” The calmness of his tone disguised the anger that licked at him as he took in the lipstick that was smeared across Spike’s lips.
“Didn’t do anything. I don’t obey all orders blindly.”
Angel reached across the table and using his thumb wiped the offending smear from his Childe.
“It’s hard to believe considering that you were given permission to take her and you show up here with her lipstick smeared across your face and her smell on your body. Why do you bother to lie to me?”
There was no guilt hovering in the cerulean eyes that stared back at him and that surprised Angel.
“She was upset and I comforted her. Then knowing it might be the last time that I ever got a chance I kissed her. No big deal. I didn’t accept your offer because I knew you didn’t really mean it.”
“I did mean it.”
“Bullshit you did. Who do you think you’re talking to? I’m the one you’ve been crying to for the last month and half about her. If I had done it without you there, you would have staked my ass.”
“Probably,” Angel smiled slightly at the impudent grin on the other vampire’s face. Spike was right. It was hard to admit sometimes but Spike knew him as well as he knew Spike. He sighed. “I should never have told her of this plan.”
“Well, you did. Now you have to clean it up because you have a twice devastated little girl over there.”
“She’s better off without me.”
“If you really thought that then you should have left her where she was. She had a life, a home and was getting involved with a human and you couldn’t stand it because it wasn’t wrapped around you.”
“Watch it.”
“Or you’re going to do what? Torture me? I don’t think your soul would allow that.”
Angel pushed his chair back to stand when Spike laid a hand on his arm and declared, “You know you have my loyalty, Angel.”
This surprised the older vampire that Spike would allow himself to be vulnerable like that. It left him open for being used. He looked into his Childe’s face and saw the truth in his eyes. He was loyal and for some reason Spike trusted him or at least trusted the Angel with a soul. Angelus never had that and never would no matter how much he tortured the younger vampire. And he sat back in amazement that he really wasn’t alone after all. He covered Spike’s hand with his own and squeezed before they quickly retreated to their sides of the table again.
“What do I do?”
“Angel, she’s ruined for anyone else. Face it. The first time she was getting over it but I don’t think she would a second time. She doesn’t really want me. Physically, yeah, but the only reason that she is going to be able to do anything about it is because I’m an extension of you. Buffy is a goody good, all about doing the right and proper thing, being in a three way relationship would be a dirty deed as far as she is concerned. The only way she can justify it is by covering it up in love.”
In a lot of ways Spike was right. Angel knew it. Joyce and Giles would blame him for everything. No matter what they did at this point he would agree he had gone too far this time. Even if she would eventually get over him she may not have the time to find someone else and be loved the way she should be. Not with being a Slayer. He sighed and looked up to contemplate the other person in this relationship, the one that they would be sharing sexually.
“And you? Are you covering it up with love?” Angel asked softly. When Spike looked away he knew he was right. He was coming to care about her and she was coming to care for him. His mate and Childe would not only be involved sexually but emotionally. And he knew it was the right thing because he cared for them and they cared for him also. “It’s all right. I want her to be with someone who will care for her and not just doing it for the sex. Just remember that I will never allow you to cut me out or I won’t take the time to torture you.”
Angel saw the relief in the blue eyes and he pushed back his chair and threw money on the table. Spike followed him as they headed back to the hotel and to Buffy and their future together.
TBC
