I Will Buy You a New Life
Chapter 10
~*"The risk it takes to remain tight inside the bud is more painful than the risk it takes to blossom."- Anais Nin*~
--3 weeks later--
"Do you ever plan to talk to him again? I mean this whole idea of me playing telephone between you two is getting a little annoying," said Nick, adjusting the phone to his ear.
"Yeah I'm gonna talk to him again...I just...you know, need to get things in my life straightened out and everything," said Angelina. It had been a few weeks since her encounter with Brian at the bus stop and since then she hadn't talked to or seen him at all. She had talked to Nick a lot about her problems, but she had yet to meet him face to face. She wouldn't know him if she tripped over him. It was nice to have someone to talk to that wasn't biased in his own favor. Nick had been telling Brian things for her and in turn had been telling her things for Brian.
"I think it's really great that you're trying so hard. How are your meetings going by the way?" She picked up the remote control to her TV and flicked it on.
"They're going good...I think they're at least helping me to let go of my past. Some of the people there have worse trust issues then I do. It may sound a little snobby, but it does kind of comfort me to know other people are more screwed up then I am."
"Why do you think I hang out with Brian?" he asked laughing. She laughed as well. "Oh yeah, I told Brian about how you miss him and stuff...he wanted me to tell you that he misses you too, but it's frustrating for him to just sit around and wait. He wants you there with him."
Angelina sighed, "I want to be there with him too, but he needs to understand that I have to work through some of this crap before I can. It's not fair to him or myself to just keep running from him whenever he's around, ya know?"
"I know, but he's not just going to sit around and wait forever. After he and Leighanne split...or she split rather, he sat around for a while, but he had someone else."
"Really? He didn't say anything about anyone after her...he just said he sat around and cried a lot," she said, flipping through the channels.
"That's for damn sure...but he had someone to cry to."
"Well, what was her name?" Nick hesitated. It was kind of his business to tell, but he and Brian had promised not to tell anyone. He somewhat felt like he should tell Angelina, though. She was both of their friends now, he could tell her if he wanted to. Right? Nick shook his head. It wasn't right of him. If Brian wanted to tell her, he would have.
"Well...uhh...I don't really know if he would want me to say anything. I'm sure he'll tell you eventually anyway."
"Oh come on Nick! What? Did he get her pregnant or something? Or wait, maybe he fell in love with a prostitute. You have to tell me now! You shouldn't have brought it up if you weren't going to tell me."
"You're right, I shouldn't have brought it up. I'll tell him to tell you when--"
"Whoa!" said Angelina. She stopped flipping channels and stared at the TV. "Nick, turn on channel 45! You gotta see this guy! He looks just like Brian." Nick grabbed the remote and flipped on the TV...he knew it had to be something having to do with the Backstreet Boys since it "looked just like Brian."
Nick flipped to the channel and "I Want It That Way" played through the speakers of his television. "Oh...well that is Brian," he said nonchalantly.
"Oh uh huh," said Angelina sarcastically.
"No, seriously it is. And that's me," he said as he watched himself begin the next verse. "I'm such a nerd," he said laughing at himself.
"Oh yeah? Well then that's me," she said as Kevin showed up on the screen.
"I really hope not. That's Brian's cousin, Kevin." Angelina watched the video with a confused expression on her face. She never really realized it, but Brian always had skirted her questions about his occupation. She'd never found out what he did, or even if he had a job. She remembered him talking about his group of friends and how he hung out with his cousin, Kevin, sometimes. The descriptions he'd given her did fit the people on the screen. Why wouldn't he have told her, though? "Hey, you there?" asked Nick noticing the long silence between them.
"Yeah, I'm here. Are you serious that's you two?" she asked, staring at the guy who looked exactly like Brian. He did look like he could be his twin, but he couldn't believe that he hadn't mentioned any of this. Hell, she couldn't believe she'd never heard of them...they seemed pretty popular, judging by all the signs and people in the video cheering them on.
"Yeah. He was scared to tell you because he didn't want you to look at him differently just because he's...well, famous." Famous? She was talking to someone famous? Well that meant Nick was famous too, right? He was in the same group after all. She didn't know whether to be angry at him for not telling her or thankful that he hadn't. She knew she would have freaked out if he would have told her when they first started talking. She would have jumped to the conclusion that he was just doing charity work and that's why he was talking to her.
"Famous? Like how famous?" she asked.
"You mean you've never heard of the Backstreet Boys?" Angelina thought for a moment. She couldn't place it...but it did ring a bell.
"I don't know...maybe."
"Well, that's us. If you've heard of us, it's probably because of this song. It's been our most popular one so far, I think," he paused for a moment, trying to think of a way to help her imagine the fame they had. "Here, think about it this way...there are about a million girls wishing they could be you right now." Angelina's jaw dropped. Whether they knew it or not there were people that were jealous of her? Whoa, that was a first in her life time. Well, as far as she knew at least.
"No pressure at all, huh?" she said sarcastically. "Damn...a million, really?" she asked. He had to be over exaggerating a hell of a lot. There was no way that many people cared about Brian. Not that she didn't think that many people should care about him, it just seemed weird that only two people in the world even knew who she was at this point in her life and here Brian and Nick were probably having to wear Halloween masks when they went out in public so they wouldn't be recognized. She giggled a little silently at the thought of Brian walking around in public with a Darth Vader mask on.
"A million plus actually," he added. Angelina nearly had to pick her jaw up off the floor. Over a million people? That was just insane.
"Damn," she said quietly. She didn't want to sound like a moron, but she did think it was pretty cool that she was talking to someone famous...hell, she thought it was cool that someone famous had kissed her...even though she'd thrown him off of her. It didn't change her opinion of him or Nick in anyway at all, it was just a bit hard to digest.
"Pretty crazy, huh?" he said, praying to God he wouldn't end up regretting telling her.
"It's just completely unbelievable."
"Yeah, well try being at the center of it," he paused for a second. "Tell ya what, when we go back out on tour in a few months, you can come along for a while. We're each allowed to bring some people, so you can come if you want. You'll get to see how everything works and stuff. Besides, I wouldn't mind meeting you face to face."
"Yeah, me either. Sometime when Brian and I start hanging out again we'll have to all go out somewhere for dinner. You, Jill, Brian, and I."
"Sounds fun," he said looking out the front windows. "Hey listen, Brian just pulled up cause we're supposed to work on some song he had an idea for or something. Is there anything you want me to tell him?"
"Hmm...tell him I said hi and he's got a beautiful voice. In fact, all...four?"
"Five."
"All five of you do. You're the blondie, right?" Nick let out a muffled laugh.
"Yeah, I'm blondie."
"Alright. I'll talk to you later," said Angelina about to hang up the phone.
"Hold on a second," said Nick putting the phone down. She could hear him and someone else, whom she assumed was Brian, talking in the background, then the sound of the phone being fumbled around and then a familiar voice filled her ear.
"Hey Angel," said Brian softly.
"Hey Bri! What's going on?"
"Nothing. So, Nick told you? I told him not to cause I was gonna take care of it but noooo he can't let Brian have any fun." Angelina laughed a little. "You mad?"
"No I'm not mad! Shocked? Yes, but I'm over it. You guys were cool before and you're still cool now." Brian let out a sigh of relief. "Well, I better go. Good luck with your song."
"Thanks, have fun at beauty school," he teased.
"Yeah, thanks," she said in a monotone voice. "How about if I just drop out and you can support me the rest of my life...sound good? Good," she said laughing.
"I don't know about all that," he said laughing too. "But hopefully someday," he said softly. "Besides, then I'd have to sing you that 'Beauty School Drop Out' song from 'Grease.'" She laughed again. She remembered why she loved talking to Brian so much..he could always make he laugh. "Anyway, Nick's being a pain in the ass, so I'm gonna go. I'll talk to you some other time. Nick says bye and he'll talk to you later."
"Ok. Bye guys."
"See ya," said Brian hanging up, a huge smile plastered across his face.
"'But hopefully someday'? Slick Brian...real slick," said Nick making fun of him.
"Shut up man! I had to make sure she knew that I was still infatuated with her," he said, still smiling.
"Infatuated? You sound like a trashy romance novel. Do you find her positively captivating as well there Bri-guy?" asked Nick laughing.
"Actually I do, dork," said Brian laughing as well. "Let's go write this song," he said heading back to the studio, his smile not leaving for the remainder of the day.
--2 weeks later--
Brian looked up at the menu, then back at the twenty-something blonde girl behind the register.
"I'll just take a Gordita...no tomatoes...and a uh...medium Diet Pepsi," he said. The girl's bored look didn't change at all as she asked him if he wanted beef or chicken. Chicken of course...it was the same thing he got every time he went to Taco Bell...he just felt like he should look at the menu anyway. She brought his food up and practically tossed the tray at him. "Can I have a packet of mild sauce too?" she leaned down and got it from beneath the counter, then tossed it on his tray. He smiled slightly, not sure if he should thank her or not, and moved over so that the next person could order from the overly excited saleslady.
"Chicken Gordita, no tomatoes, one packet of mild sauce, and a Diet Pepsi...that could only be one person." Brian turned around and almost jumped back three feet. "How have you been?" asked Angelina. Brian's jaw was on the floor. She looked so...different. He couldn't really place it, but something about her was different. Maybe it was because she seemed to have a genuine smile on her face...something he couldn't remember ever seeing before. She looked happy for the first time since he'd known her.
"I've been good...and you?"
"Really good," she said stepping up to the register after the person before her was through. "What'd you get?" she asked Brian. He answered and she turned to the employee and ordered the same thing, but with a Mountain Dew instead. She got her food and the two headed towards a table. "You mind if I join you?" she asked. He shook his head no immediately. She smiled and sat down across from him.
"So, Nick tells me you've been going to some sort of class." Angelina nodded, taking a bite of her Gordita, then setting it down on the tray while she chewed. She picked up her Mountain Dew and took a long sip before talking.
"Yeah, we meet every Wednesday night. It's this class of people with troubled pasts that affect them still, like me. So far it seems to be working good enough. Really the only thing I regret about my past now is fucking around with your emotions. That wasn't right of me, and I'm sorry. I've been wanting to say that to you for a while now...I'm really sorry. I didn't realize at the time what I was doing, but now everything seems so clear to me. For the first time I can understand how bad I must have hurt you. One of the guys in this class was talking about almost the same thing happening to him as what happened to you, and it totally made sense, ya know? Since his marriage hadn't worked out and then the lady he was after didn't give him the time of day, he felt like he was inadequate or something, and I really don't want you to think that. You should never feel that way, because you're not."
"Wow," said Brian smiling. "Well, don't worry about it. I'm too stubborn to take no as an answer anyway, I hadn't given up," he said smiling. "I can tell you seem a lot happier today then you have any other time we've talked." She nodded her head, chewing her food.
"Way more happy," she said after she swallowed. "I don't feel like I'm even the same person anymore. I mean, I have my days when all I want to do is sit in my house and cry about everything, but then I think about it all and realize that everything worked out for the better. Had none of it happened, I never would have met you and I never would have been saved." Brian's heart skipped a beat. Saved? She meant he had saved her? No way. What had he done? Complicated things more for her, that's what. "Yeah, saved," she said smiling, noticing the confused look on his face. "Whether or not Dominick would have come into my life, I still would have been brought up in the most horrible of ways. I'm thankful that I got out of there...even if it was for the wrong reasons." Brian swallowed the food that he hadn't realized he'd been holding in his mouth.
"Well, I'm glad you got out of there too," he said, for lack of anything else to say. He was so happy she was sitting across from him...it was almost too good to be true. He'd dreamt about this day for the last month, and here she was finally. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, but he didn't know where to start...or if he should at all. "So...does this mean we're gonna start hanging out again, or do you need more time?" he asked, suddenly becoming very interested in his Pepsi cup.
"Our bumping into each other wasn't an accident," she said simply. He looked up at her, confused for a second, but then he understood what she meant. Nick must have told her where he was going for lunch. Then he recalled the conversation they'd had about their favorite things and least favorite things. Taco Bell had been about number 5 on her list of dislikes. It definitely was no accident. She'd told him that she'd rather be Bill Clinton's secretary then eat at a Taco Bell. He smiled a little, thinking about it...maybe there was hope for them after all.
"Well, I'm glad that it happened...accident or not," he said wadding up the used wrapper of his Gordita and throwing it on the tray. "So have you talked to Nick today?" She nodded, taking a sip of her Mountain Dew.
"Yeah, I talked to him earlier. He said you're staying with him for a while?"
"Yep. I was getting bored in Windermere all alone, so I asked him if I could stay for a week or two...he was cool with it, which surprised me a little. I mean before when I was staying with him, Jill was in Ft. Myers, but now she's home and he's still cool with my staying with him? It was just kinda weird to me."
"Yeah, that is kind of weird," she said, standing up and grabbing her and Brian's trays and carrying them over to the garbage can with Brian close behind. "Nick seems like a cool guy, though."
"Thanks," he said.
"For what?"
"Throwing my garbage away."
"Oh," she said laughing, "I didn't even realize I had." Yeah, because she was too busy trying to sort all of the questions that were whirling around in her head that she wanted to ask Brian.
"Well thank you anyway," he grinned. "Hey, how about if you come over to Nick's today and I'll make dinner for the four of us?" he asked, holding the door open for her.
"I don't know, I'm still--"
"OH MY GOD!" Brian and Angelina both whirled around to see what the big deal was. A teenage girl, clutching her Taco Bell cup was about 5 yards away...obviously a fan of the Backstreet Boys. Her friend, who looked a few years older then her, grabbed her arm and dragged her towards the pair. Brian looked back at Angelina.
"Here comes your first encounter with a fan. Just act cool and if she says anything rude to you, just brush it off," he said, turning around just in time for the two girls to walk up to them. Angelina hid behind him...her arms crossed over her chest as she watched the cars whizzing by. It was then that she realized that she had a long way to go before she could get used to these high-pitched screams everyday. She also realized that she was farther away from getting over her fear of people then she thought she was. Sure, she was fine with Brian after about a month and a half of therapy, but she found herself cowering behind him when new people came around. She hadn't even liked the idea of having to order her food from a complete stranger...but it seemed easy with Brian standing beside her. That's when she realized for the first time the true importance of his friendship with her.
"Who's that?" asked the girl, jerking Angelina out of her thoughts. She looked over, but quickly looked away again.
"My friend," said Brian.
"Hi," said the younger girl, walking around Brian to talk to Angelina. "What's your name?"
"Angelina," she said softly, staring at the ground.
"I'm April, and I just wanted to let you know how extremely lucky you are to have a friend like Brian," she said smiling. Angelina looked up briefly to smile in return. Brian could see how uncomfortable she looked and knew he had to do something.
"Well, it was nice meeting you April and Stephanie, but we really need to get going," he said smiling at the two girls. He leaned in and gave both of them a hug, then led Angelina away from the two and towards his car. He opened the passenger door for her and helped her in, then ran around to his side, slumping down in the driver's seat. "I'm really sorry about that," he said before starting the car. Angelina looked at him and smiled.
"Don't worry about it," she said, the smile she'd worn before returning to her face.
"I really didn't expect that one. Of course, I never expect it...unless we're doing a show or something."
"It didn't even click to me when that girl screamed that she was screaming about you. I thought that she swallowed a bug or something," she laughed. Brian laughed also. "I guess I really have no idea how much fame you have." Brian sighed.
"Yeah, it's pretty chaotic. Kevin has videos upon videos of crazy fan stuff, I'll have to play them for you sometime," he said, starting the car and pulling out of the parking lot. "Oh yeah, by the way, you want a ride home?" he looked over at her and smiled as they drove down the road. She giggled a little and nodded.
"Yeah, I guess," she said smiling. Neither of them had realized that she hadn't gone their with him...it just felt natural to the both of them.
"So hey, I was gonna ask this before that girl came running up to us...would you like to come over to Nick's tonight...I'll make dinner for the four of us and you can meet them and stuff." Angelina thought about it for a while. She did really want to meet Nick and Jill, but she just wasn't sure if she was ready. She didn't want to cower behind Brian all night.
"I don't think I'm..."
"Don't worry about it," he said glancing over and smiling at her. He knew she didn't want to have to admit that she was still scared. "Then let me take you out for dinner."
"Didn't you make me dinner last time? How about if I make you dinner tonight?" she asked looking over at him. She saw his smile increase a little as he nodded. "Great. Then just drop me off at the store and I'll get everything I need and walk back to my place."
"I'll just go in with you and then drive you home after you get everything you're gonna need."
"No! That would ruin the surprise! Just drop me off and then come over to my place at around...6:00ish?" she asked as he turned the corner into the Publix parking lot.
"Alright, I'll be there. Do you want me to bring anything?" he asked as he slowed the car at the front door. She sat in the seat and thought about it for a second.
"Nope, I don't think so. What are you going to want to drink? I think all I have is Mountain Dew and wine."
"Wine's good," he said stopping and putting the car in park.
"You don't drink beer? I thought all guys did," she said smiling.
"Well of course I drink beer!" he said, grinning. "You don't have to buy anything special for me though...if I decide I want some, I'll bring it with."
"Alright," she said opening the door, getting out of his car, and shutting the door. She leaned in through the window. "Thanks for the ride. I'll see you later," she said smiling.
"Later Angel." She turned and walked through the automatic doors and into the store with Brian watching her the entire time. His heart was beating double time as he blissfully drove down the road, singing to whatever came on the radio. He even surprised himself by not turning it off when NSync or Britney Spears came on, but instead he sang along. He was too happy to care what was going on around him.
-=Chapter Eleven=-
-=Chapter Index=-
-=Story Index=-
-=Back to BoNe RoKin' KaoS=-