“But Brian, I love you.”
“You ‘love' me? How the hell can you say that? You cheated on me Kelly.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
“That’s a pathetic excuse.”
“Brian please! Don’t leave me.”
“I’m sorry Kelly. I can’t stay with you. Just looking at you repulses me. I never want to see you again. Goodbye.”
“No!” she shouted as he walked out the door, slamming it behind him.
He crawled into his Jeep and hit the steering wheel repeatedly.
“It’s better than hitting her,” he thought out loud.
He drove off, unsure of where to go, “I can’t go home, Kevin and Howie are there with Alexia and Michelle. Mom’s still in Kentucky, man I wish she’d move down here.”
He drove in silence for a second, contemplating where he should go, “I’ll go to Bonnie’s!”
He spun the wheel and headed in the direction of his best friend’s apartment, “I just hope she’s there.”
Ten minutes later, he stood at her door. “Brian?” she asked, opening the door, “What’s up?”
“Kelly and I just broke up.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. The bitch cheated on me again.”
Bonnie walked over to him and hugged him tightly, “I really am sorry Bri-Bear.”
He smiled at that, “You haven’t called me that since we were six.”
“I know. We grew up. Bri-Bear wasn’t for manly six-year olds.”
“Why did I take her back? She’s done this to me twice before!”
“You loved her.”
“Yeah well that’s over.”
“Come on Brian, I think we need a movie night.”
“I gotta work tomorrow.”
“We won’t stay up that late, I promise.”
“All right, but if I’m late tomorrow, Fatima will have my head!”
“Ah, the life of a Backstreet Boy.”
Bonnie grabbed her jacket and keys and they took Brian’s Jeep to go to Blockbuster. They rented “Halloween,” “A Nightmare on Elm Street,” “Scream,” and “I Know What You Did Last Summer.”
Bonnie popped some popcorn and Brian munched on Twizzlers while they watched the horror movies. Even though Brian had to be at work at 6:30 the next day, they stayed up until 2:00.
As Brian was falling asleep on the floor, he muttered, “Thanks Bonnie.”
“For what?”
“For being such a good friend.”
“It’s no problem. Just stay the hell away from my Barbies.”
“Hey, I never woul’ve stolen your Barbies if you hadn’t taken my GI Joes.”
“Yeah right Bri-Bear. Good night.”
“Night.”
The next day, Brian was groggy and a little cranky. “Hey cuz, what’s wrong?” Kevin asked durnig their break.
“Nothing, I’m just a little tired, that’s all.”
“Oh, are you sure that’s all?”
He considered telling Kevin about Kelly for a second, but there were too many people around, “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Okay.”
Brian snapped at Nick during practice and stormed off. Kevin found him in the parking lot.
“What’s wrong?”
“Kelly and I broke up.”
“What happened?”
“The bitch cheated on me.”
“Damn.”
“I know. But Bonnie was cool enough o let me crash at her place last night.”
“You could’ve come home.”
“Alexia and Michelle were there.”
“Not all night.”
“I know, but Bonnie and I had a movie night to cheer me up.”
“I don’t think it worked.”
“Very funny.”
“Come on, let’s get back to practice before Fatima kills us.”
Brian groaned as he got up, “This day is gonna suck.”
The rest of the day was pretty much uneventful. The guys were extra careful of what they said and did around Brian so they wouldn’t set him off again. That night at home, Brian had trouble sleeping. When he did get to sleep, he had nightmares about Kelly. She was sitting on the couch in her apartment. Some guy walked over to her and they started making out. Brian started yelling and Kelly just laughed at him. She looked at him and said, “I can’t believe you actually thought I cared about you. I used you to boost my career, you pathetic worm.”
He woke up in a cold sweat. He called Bonnie to try and calm down a little.
“Hello?”
“Bonnie?”
“Brian? Do you have any idea what time it is?”
“About midnight, yeah I know. I’m sorry for calling this late, but I really need to talk to you. Can you come over?”
“Yeah, I’ll be there in 10.”
15 minutes later, Bonnie was sitting on Brian’s bed, listening to him recap the details of his dream. “Brian, you’ve got to move on. You dumped her, remember?”
“I know, but I think that I might still love her.”
“You always will. It’s a simple fact of life that love never dies. But you’ve got to let go of the past and grab hold of the future.”
They fell asleep talking and Brian slept a little better. When he woke up, Bonnie was in his arms.
* Yawn * “ What the-?”
He carefully unwrapped his arms from around Bonnie and slipped out of his bed to go take a shower.
While he was in the bathroom, she woke up and went to get something to drink from the kitchen. She heard the shower turn off and she waited 15 minutes before going back into Brian’s room.
As she was walking in, Brian was walking out of the bathroom. He was still wrapped up in his towel, but he wasn’t dripping wet and his hair was combed.
Bonnie turned three different shades of red while Brian just laughed.
“What’s so funny Brian Thomas Littrell?”
“Your face. I haven’t seen it change that many colors since your mom caught you kissing Bobby MacFarland in 5th grade.”
“Oh shut up Brian!”
He laughed and she sat down n the bed, putting her face in her hands.
“You always manage to embarrass me Brian. One of these days, I’m going to find a way to embarrass the hell out of you and pay you back for everything you’ve done to me.”
“Yeah right.”
Brian temporarily forgot he was wearing a towel and went to tickle her. She fought him off, but his towel fell to the floor.
This time, they both turned red. Brian froze and Bonnie’s eyes instinctively traveled down. “BONNIE!”
“Sorry, reflex,” she said, averting her eyes.
Brian scrambled to put his towel back around his waist. Reaching in his drawer, he put on a pair of boxers.
“You know, this isn’t the first time you’ve seen me naked. Why are we so embarrassed now?”
“Because the last time we saw each other naked, we were four and your mom was giving us a bath.”
“Oh yeah…”
They sat on the bed and talked about old times.
“Hey Bonnie, do you remember when your mom found my GI Joes in your closet?”
“Yeah, she made me give them back.”
“You were so mad I thought you’d spit nails.”
“Yeah, but that’s nothing compared to the time your mom found us wrestling and thought we were trying to kill each other.”
“Oh yeah, that was so much fun. Why did we stop wrestling?”
“Because I got boobs.”
"So?”
“We grew up.”
“That doesn’t mean that we can’t wrestle.”
“Is that an invitation to fight?”
“Definitely.”
Bonnie lunged at him and knocked him over, pinning him down.
“You’re no fun. It’s too easy to win with you.”
“Wanna bet?” he asked, flipping them over.
“Hey! No fair!”
“How so?”
“I wasn’t ready!”
“Well, you should’ve been.”
Bonnie tried to fight him off, but she couldn’t. Brian slowly leaned towards her and brushed his lips against hers. The kiss escalated into a more passionate embrace and they pulled away simultaneously.
“What are we doing Brian?”
“I don’t know.”
He got up from on top of her and sat down on his bed. Bonnie left the room so he could finish getting dressed. She had a shoot in about two hours, so she had to leave soon, but she wanted to talk to Brian about the kiss.
Alexia emerged from Kevin’s room with a smile on her face.
“Hey Bonnie, what’s up?”
“Not much. Can I talk to you for a sec?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“As you know, Brian and Kelly broke up. Well, I’ve been spending a lot of time with him, trying to cheer him up. This morning, I walked into his room and he was coming out of the bathroom. His towel fell off and after he put on some boxers, we started to wrestle and then we kissed.”
“So…?”
“He’s my best friend! I can’t kiss him!”
“But you told me that you thought maybe you felt something more than friendship for him.”
“I do, I know that. But he’s on the rebound.”
“If you love him, go for it.”
“I’ll think about it. In the meantime, I hear Kevin waking up and if I’m not mistaken, he’s about to take a shower.”
Alexia grinned, “Oh shut up Bonnie. But you know what, I think I’ll take a shower too.”
“See ya later.”
“Yeah, go for it girlie!” she called behind her as she headed for Kevin’s bathroom.
Bonnie looked up a the clock and realized that she had an hour and a half to go home, shower, get dressed and be at the shoot on time. Even though she wanted to talk to Brian, she left the apartment and headed to her own.
She arrived to the shoot over 20 minutes late, but she didn’t get chewed out, a fact that surprised her. She didn’t really listen to the photographer’s orders or what he was saying. It didn’t really matter anymore, she quit caring what he said a long time ago. Today was different though, it wasn’t just that she didn’t care, it was the fact that all she could think about was Brian and the kiss. She’d dreamt of kissing him since she was 13 years old. Now that she was 23 and grown, she wanted more, but soon after he started dating Kelly, she realized that all he’d ever think of her as was a sister.
“Bonnie…BONNIE!”
“What?” she asked, snapping out of her daze.
“We’ve been trying to get your attention for the past five minutes. We’re done.”
“All right, I’ll see you.”
She took off the designer clothes and slipped into her Nike tee shirt and wind pants. On her way out, her cell phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Hey Bonnie. I’ve got something I need to talk to you about. Can you come to my apartment?” Alexia asked her.
“Sure thing. I’ll be there in 10.”
When she drove up to Alexia’s apartment, she noticed that Kevin’s car was there too. She walked into her friend’s apartment and caught them making out on the couch like a couple of teenagers.
“Hey you two!”
“Sorry, we lost track of time,” Alexia said, blushing, “Anyway, I want to talk to you in private, so I’ll see you later Kevy.”
“Later, sweetie.”
As soon as Kevin left, Alexia turned to Bonnie with a huge smile on her face.
“There’s something I have to tell you and something I have to ask you.”
“Okay…”
“First, Kevin proposed this morning.”
“Congratulations.”
“Thank you. Now for the question, would you be the maid of honor?”
“I’d love to,” she said, hugging Alexia tightly.
“Oh yeah, one more thing. The wedding’s in a month.”
“A MONTH?”
“Yeah, I know, it’s not much time, but we want to get married as soon as possible.”
“I understand.”
They talked for a while, deciding on plans for the wedding, The colors would be royal blue and silver and it would be held on Halloween. They said it would be better to celebrate life and love rather than death. They stayed there for over two hours and Kevin came back shortly after they had decided on the colors. He helped with the plans and called his mom to tell her the happy news.
When Bonnie left, she was utterly exhausted. She’d thrown herself into making plans to temporarily forget the Brian problem. She’d always loved him, but she was only just now realizing how much.
She went home to take a nap and a shower. After her nap, she got a call from her agent. He said that she was needed in Madrid right away. One of the models scheduled for a Calvin Klein shoot had broken her ankle and couldn’t make it.
She threw some clothes in a bag and left for the airport. She decided she’d send Brian an e-mail later so she wouldn’t have to talk to him. When she got to Madrid, her agent met her at the gate. He handed her a list of the shoots he had her scheduled for. She was booked up until the wedding.
“Hey Jimmy, I can’t work after these dates. A friend of mine’s getting married and I’m the maid of honor.”
“We’ll see.”
“No, I’m not working on her wedding day or the week before, got it?”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Much better.”
Jimmy had a good heart, but he made her work entirely too hard. She’d almost missed her sister’s wedding because of her hectic schedule. He’d almost gotten fired for that.
She and Brian kept in touch via e-mail, but they were both usually too tired to make them very long. The kiss, much to Bonnie’s relief, was never mentioned. When Bonnie came back to the States, she stopped by the MTV studios in New York to go on TRL. She been on before and Carson had asked her out. She had to turn him down because of a shoot that she had lined up, but this time when he asked, she made sure that her schedule was clear.
They went to dinner and all during, Bonnie felt guilty. Carson sensed that something was wrong. They left early to go talk.
“I’m sorry Carson, I’ve got a lot on my mind.”
“Let me guess, he’s got brownish hair and baby blue eyes.”
“Wait, how did you know?”
“I’ve seen the way you look at him, I can tell that you’re in love with him.”
“Am I that obvious?”