Chapter 7: Frozen Fellowship

Gandalf was afraid of the dark, so he decided that they would go up the mountain, instead of under it, through Moria. The mountain was big, and had lots of snow. Everyone was pretty much okay so far, except for Beatrice who, like the hobbits, wasn't wearing shoes or socks, but unlike them, didn't have hair on her feet to keep her warm. And so, along the mountain she trampled, until she could trample no more.

Beatrice: *falls down* I can't do it anymore! It's too cold! I think I have frostbite!

Merry: *turns to Pippin* Dr. Pip, shall we amputate her toes?

Pippin: *turns to Merry* Why, yes, Dr. Merry, I think we shall!

Beatrice: I'm serious! I'm so cold! *sits in the snow* If I don't receive proper medical treatment, I think I'll freeze!

Pippin: *looks thoughtful* Hey, Sam! Does that pony of yours have any room for a hobbit with frostbite? (Beatrice: Not a hobbit.)

Sam: Sure... as long as it's not you!

Pippin: *curls lip at Sam* For your information, I don't HAVE frostbite! (I have fleas!)

Everyone: *backs away from Pip*

Pippin: I'm kidding!

Beatrice: Am I gonna get on that pony or what?

Pippin: Oh yeah, sure... some help, please, Merry...

Both: *lift up Beatrice (Beatrice: Hey! That tickles!) and put her on Bill the Pony (Bill: NEEEEEEE!)*

Beatrice: Ahhhh... much better...

Meanwhile, Frodo decided that he wanted some attention, too, so he fell down the mountain, too.

Frodo: Weeee! *drops the ring* Oops.

Boromir: *grabs the ring by the chain* Ooh... pretty ring...

Strider: Put the ring DOWN, Boromir!

Boromir: *ignores Strider* Isn't it funny how such a small thing can cause so much trouble?

Frodo: Yeah, really funny.... Um, can I get the ring back, now?

Boromir: *stares at Frodo a while holding the chain* Yeah, sure, whatever! *gives him the ring and ruffles his hair* Like I care! *keeps walking*

Frodo: Ooookay...

As they made their way up, they found themselves on a narrow path on the mountain.

Beatrice: *mutters to herself* Don't look down... don't look down... *Bill slips and she looks down* I looked down!

Sam: *grabs Bill's reigns* There, there, Bill. *pats Bill*

Beatrice: *still in shock* `there, there, BILL'?

Pippin: *grabs Beatrice's hair* There, there, Beatrice. *pats her hair*

Beatrice: *pulls back and flicks Pippin's head* I didn't mean THAT!

Suddenly, the group stopped for in the distance they could hear a voice. It sounded faint, like the wind, but they could still hear it. It kept getting stronger and stronger.

Gandalf: Uh oh.

Gimli: What's that supposed to mean?

Merry and Pippin: Yeah!

Gandalf: That's Saruman's voice...

As soon as the wizard had uttered these words, snow from above them started falling on them. And before they knew it, they were all covered in snow. After what seemed like forever, they slowly started crawling to the surface.

Sam: *gets out* Ahhh... air! Frodo? Frodo! *searches in the snow, until he finds his friend's hand and pulls him out*

Frodo: Thanks Sam! I think we'd better help some of the others out!

Sam: *nods*

Merry: *pops out* Hullo, Sam! Hullo Frodo! Where's everyone?

Frodo: The others are covered in snow!

Pippin: *pops out* Not me!

Bill the Pony: *pops out* Neeeee!

Sam: What Bill means to say is `Me neither!'.

Merry: How would you know?

Sam: DO NOT QUESTION SAMWISE GAMGEE!

Merry: *shrinks back* Okay.

Pippin: Has anyone noticed anything strange?

Frodo: Like?

Pippin: Like, that Bill the pony has come out of the snow, but not Beatrice?

Sam: Hmmm... yes, that is rather odd...

Bill: NEEEEEEE!

Sam: Bill says that she was on his back but her leg hair was irritatin' his skin, so he threw her off!

Beatrice: *pops out* Hey! My leg hair isn't rough!

Gimli: *pops out* Speak for yourself! When you fell off the pony, you fell on me-

Beatrice: Eeeeeeeeeew!

Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Frodo: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Beatrice: *flicks them all the heads*

Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Frodo: OUCHIES!

In a few moments, they were all out of the snow, and pretty much ready to go.

Gandalf: We cannot continue at this rate... by nightfall we'll have probably been covered in snow 20 times!

Beatrice: Nooooo!

Gimli: I'm tellin' ya, we should go through Moria; roasting fires, stories, oh, it'll be lots of fun! The dwarves will treat you like kings! *sees Beatrice giving him a dirty look* And queens!

Beatrice: *smiles*

Gandalf: Hmmmm.... I dunno... it is up to ringbearer... Frodo?

Frodo: *mutters* Aw, man! Make the little guy decide! *out loud* Um, I think... I think we'll go through Moria!

Gandalf: *thinks* `Noooooo!' *says* Moria, it is!

And with that, the group made their way down the mountain, so they could go into the darkness of the Mines of Moria!