From the Dark Side of the Mirror: Survivor Poems

Tell me in your sweetest voice
what you want to steal from me –
Thieving grasp wrapped in no choice,
scarring my naiveté…
Touch me in your gentlest way
and draw what innocence remains –
Hidden in the words you say
is violence cloaked in velvet chains.

Within the night
by darkened light,
he looked upon his daughter;
Such innocence
had no defense
against the child’s own father.

You walked into the room so cool;
you took this child for a fool
You acted like I could say "no";
you acted like I was your "ho".
Shattered pieces on the floor --
a child shattered, and what for?
Because your daddy shattered you,
I figured it was all you knew.

All your words denied your heart;
your actions just betrayed your part-
Your guilt destroyed a child’s dream;
your anger sucked away the scream.

Don’t worry, though, I have survived;
life does go on – dead or alive –
And I have taken back control:
reclaimed myself, restored my soul.

Gonna take a train-
the next train outta here
Gonna take a train-
and just plain disappear.

Black on black
on starless sky
Darkly written
Draw the child
who will not cry
Into the trappings
of your lie.

Red on red
on bloody hands
You thought you were
some kind of man
Your crimson fear
has carved a brand
Upon my soul
like a talisman.

Silver mirror
echoes loss
Ghostly image
etched in frost
Shadow spirit-
vacant cross
Child betrayed
to pay the cost.

Midnight blue
in vacant eyes
I’m sure you
didn’t realize
That I would live
and you would die
Ironic truth
you can’t deny.

What did you care of love or light?
What demons played your hand?
You thought you killed a useless child…
But guess what?
Here I am!

I walk the sky
on cloudy trails
not touching ground at all;
I dance with lightning,
play with hail,
and dare the stars to fall…
I walk the night
on to the moon
with sunlight in my fist;
I ride the rainbow
through the storm,
and fade into the mist.
The light is on-
the door unlocked:
"Come home, my child, come home…"
The danger’s gone
and love returned:
"Come home, my child, come home."

I remember now
where it was
that I had been
and fluorished
before this was
before the darkness
came to keep me
like it has.
I cannot think
-not deep, not clear-
for I did not want
to come at all...
I knew the fear
would conquer me
against its concrete wall,
and it has.

The Healing Room