cookies for the people

 
do:!drink
Mountain Dew + CM's Spiced Rum = fucking vile. Ah well, I'm getting plastered tonight regardless. The new name for my new concoction is 'Stale Pink', as in, it tastes like pink bubblegum that you've been chewing for an hour. It looks like urine, and I bet it'll feel like fucking magma coming out. Ah well. You never drink Mountain Dew, you only 'borrow death'. The interest on that loan is 7% impotence, semiannually, or Prime Rate times two, whichever is more humiliating. You know, Prime is pretty bad right now. Or so I'm told. I've never actually taken out a loan before.

  posted by james @ 4.1.02

 
alabama slamma!
I was planning on writing about my vacation after I got back, instead of before I headed home, but that's not how it worked out. The best men get laid while the mice get fucked up, or something. Anyway, was supposed to go drinking tonight on my last night here... making it a wondrous total of two nights that my bastard friends bothered to hang with me while I was here... but apparently that's not gonna happen. D2 disks are at work, mud's down, so I'm logging. Yeah, fuck you too.
The whole vacation thing isn't working out too well anyway, not really minding heading back to school. I remembered things being a bit better than they are, which I guess was less of 'memory' and more of just 'being wrong'. The grass is actually greener in BC, not Alberta, and so is the mush.
The bus ride out here was torture. I ended up with a noob driver who took bad turns and stopped in every single little town (in other words, every gas station) from Vancouver to Calgary. There were some attractive young women, some interesting people to talk to, and even some attractive young women who were interesting to talk to, but you know me. Or myabe you don't. Suffice it to say I didn't have any amazing bus-romance, enlightening discussions or anything other than being asleep, wishing-I-was-asleep, and ogling. Three cheers for ogling.
I spent the majority of my time here gaming, since the people I knew are apparently really boring, or something. The whole old crew was run-into, with the exception of Tyler (not really part of the 'crew', but good for LAN-ing) and Thea (I think she became part of the crew, not sure as I was living in BC at the time, was in France or something when I got here). The whole crew-before-the old crew was also run into, and it was nice seeing Jazmine again, Landon still drank a lot which was cool in my books, and Lindsay inadvertently provided me with a few more minutes of heart-wrenching agony, to make up for the months I'd been away. Not that I'm one to point fingers. At Landon, that is. Drinking is good fun.
Anyway, I ran into them (the before-old-crew-crew) when I was out drinking with TJ and Brody at the Catwalk. What can I say about the Catwalk? Oh yeah, it fucking sucks. Seizure inducing lighting and the Top 40 augmented patronage that included very few cool guys and E-tripping ladies (the only two things worth going to a Top 40 bar for). After about 120 songs (they ran through the Top 40 thrice - whee!) I think the DJ just popped in Dance Mix 93 and went out for a smoke. Hearing 'Jump Around' was uplifting, until I realized that I had to listen to an hour or so more early-nineties shit, but by that point it was last call so I booked it over to Pita Pit for a pita. In a pit. Also ran into Beatrice, who had gone from A-student to A-student in leather (and one who looks good in leather, to boot) as well as Jen and Brooklyn, who were the same, I guess. I was too busy trying to will myself to death to really notice.
Also went to see Ali. Remember when I said Vanilla Sky was the worst movie of the year? If not, scroll down, it's probably down there somewhere. Anyway, yeah, I was wrong. Ali was the worst movie of the year. Ali was fucking horrible, and I know I use 'fucking horrible' pretty loosely here, but this time I mean it. As in, it was so horrible that I would have fucked men to get out of it. Well, maybe not. Definitely not, actually, since I stayed when I could have walked out. But yeah, it was shitty. Nothing much happened, the fight scenes sucked, the message of the movie was 'racism is bad' or some such crap that I can get from the Power Rangers if I need it (and without needing to claw out my eyes afterwards!) and Ali was so much of a lecher that I couldn't even keep track of who his current fling was. Not that I'd hold that against him, just that the film itself was confusing. Bad confusing, not like that other movie. The one with the guy that kills people.
Tonight we were supposed to go see 'The One', because I've only seen the Matrix eight times. When we got down to the theater, Matt didn't fucking show, so we decided to go get drunk with John, except Jimmy never called Fuzz who then didn't call me and nothing happened. At the theater were Kathleen, Nancy, Lance and a handful of people I went to highschool with and didn't meet. I think one of them's a model now, or something. So yeah, the movie could have been alright, since I'd developed a resistance to Lance's being-an-ass-ness by the end of grade 10, and could have played my suave wiles on those present of the opposite sex (you know, for laughs, and also to make sure they never spoke to me again) but I invested my night in drinking, and lost it all. The night, that is. Fuck this, I'm going home.

  posted by james @ 4.1.02