Final Decent

*** I wrote this poem after getting into a fight with a friend, a guy friend actually, who really hurt me. He was someone i had thought i could trust myself with, but found out that even the most trustworthy have their weaknesses. He was being a real ass and this is how he made me feel. instead of doing what the poem says, i wrote about it instead. it helped me vent my feelings and deal with it. Turned into a good poem though ;P so thanks for the inspiration, even if it was from pain.***

I sit here crying, slowly dying

Reeling from the stinging words you say.

Sharp as steal, they run me though

Cutting me deep, making my soul bleed.

You greedily sap my will to live,

To survive the fall.

You say you’re my friend,

Smiling at me with your wicked grin,

Betraying you true intent.

You have a divided soul,

One to hide the cruelty within.

And like a fool I come back to you.

Allow you to hurt me, to torture me

Until you throw me away,

Leaving me to come crawling back on my hands and knees.

But never again.

I can see through glamour that you hold up,

It’s growing thin.

I can see you don’t care for me.

Maybe you never did,

But this means nothing.

I can’t escape you.

I hate you.

For what you do to me, for what you can make me feel.

And yet, after it all, I still care.

I can’t escape you.

There’s no where to turn, no where to hide.

My soul won’t believe what my heart wants to cry.

So on I fall, waiting to reach the end of this,

My final decent.

~Written August 15th 2002~

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