beauty is in the eye of the beerholder...

What am I?


Clue 1: I'M ABOUT 8 INCHES LONG.

Clue 2: MY FUNCTIONING IS ENJOYED BY MEMBERS OF BOTH SEXES.

Clue 3: I'M USUALLY FOUND HUNG, DANGLING LOOSELY,READY FOR INSTANT ACTION.

Clue 4: I HAVE A CLUMP OF HAIRY THINGS AT ONE END

Clue 5: IN USE, I'M INSERTED, ALMOST ALWAYS WILLINGLY, SOMETIMES SLOWLY, SOMETIMES QUICKLY, INTO A WARM, FLESHY, MOIST OPENING.

Clue 6: THERE I'M THRUST IN AND DRAWN OUT AGAIN AND AGAIN MANY TIMES IN SUCCESSION, OFTEN QUICKLY AND ACCOMPANIED BY SQUIRMING BODILY MOVEMENTS.

Clue 7: ANYONE FOUND LISTENING IN WILL MOST SURELY RECOGNIZE THE RHYTHMIC, PULSING SOUND, RESULTING FROM THE WELL LUBRICATED MOVEMENTS.

Clue 8: WHEN FINALLY WITHDRAWN, I LEAVE BEHIND A JUICY, FROTHY, STICKY WHITE SUBSTANCE, SOME OF WHICH WILL NEED CLEANING FROM THE OUTER SURFACES OF THE OPENING AND SOME FROM MY LONG GLISTENING SHAFT.

Clue 9: AFTER EVERYTHING IS DONE AND THE FLOWING AND CLEANSING LIQUIDS HAVE CEASED EMANATING, I RETURN TO MY FREELY HANGING SELF READY FOR YET ANOTHER BIT OF ACTION.

Clue 10: HOPEFULLY I WILL REACH MY BRISTLING CLIMAX TWICE OR THREE TIMES A DAY, BUT OFTEN IT IS MUCH LESS

What am I????

AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY GUESSED,
THE ANSWER TO THE RIDDLE IS NONE OTHEN THAN YOUR VERY OWN....

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TOOTHBRUSH !!! What the hell were you thinking of??


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