Ok, so I went and checked out the newest James Bond flick. This was inevitable, James Bond is the best. I mean, is there anybody who doesn't stop whatever it is that they are doing whenever they see that familiar rifled barrrel come swinging across the screen to land on the silouetted super spy? Of course not! It's the ultimate lifestyle, beautiful women, big pocker games, liscence to kill annoying people. Who cares if every movie has the same plot? We don't watch this for the plot, we watch it to see what kind of car James Bond is driving this week, or who his hot woman is, or where he's vacationing. You see, in a perfect world, that would be the car that I was driving, and the woman I was dating, and the beach I'd be languishing on.

So, is this James Bond movie any good? Well let's start with Daniel Craig. Let's be honest, the mother fucker is ugly. That's AWESOME! Frankly, I'm sick of seeing a pansy piece of shit pretty boy like Pierce Brosnan driving my car and shagging my girl. But the other thing about Craig is that he obviously knows he's ugly so he's spent like a billion hours in the gym to at least have a good body. Good for him, that's like a four foot eight profesional basketball player whose only in the league because he makes every god damned one of his free throws. Discipline to make up for physical shortcomings. When faced with a choice between talent and discipline, take discipline every time.

Plus, Daniel Craig can actually act, and he really looks like he's capable of killing somebody. That's sort of necessary in a movie about a...well a professional killer. So, in the end, I have no problem with Daniel Craig.

But what the fuck is with the script? I mean, the movie was obviously as all the critics say, the best Bond flick for ten years, but the script still had some major problems. I can't figure out why they take this great franchise and this great character and then they get a made for TV screenwriter and director. I'd heard that Quentin Tarantino was interested in doing a Bond flick, fuck it! Let him! Make the ultimate best ever James Bond movie by which all other Bond movies pale in comparison.

Not that this movie was incompetent or anything like that, it was just kind of clumsy and dodgy in parts. There were places where the dialogue was a little choppy and redundant like when Bond says: "well I understand that 00's have a very short life expenctancy, so your mistake will be short lived." Short, short, short, lived, lived, lived, I mean if you find yourself repeating the same word over and over again in your sentences, you're probably saying the SAME THING! There's no need for it.

But don't get me wrong, this is just a cosmetic kind of mistake. The thing I loved about the movie was that James Bond was actually allowed to lose a couple hands of poker. I was kind of wondering about that since James Bond never loses. Anybody who knows anything about a Texas hold 'em tournament knows that you can't win without losing or folding some hands. The actual finale of the game is something you'd never see in a million years though. All good hold 'em players bet hard when they have an AQ of the same suit. They do this to knock out the players with low hands so they can't win on the improbable possiblity that they'll grab a straight off the big blind. But whatever, at least the hands were't completely obvious (although I did predict Bond's hand down to the suit before I watched the movie).

Anyway, I'm looking forward to the relaunch of this franchise. I just wish the'd fix up those last dangling loose ends.

The End