Instinctively she took a step back, nearly falling over her music stand. A frail hand reached out to steady her.
"I … I didn't mean to startle you. I guess I'd forgotten how absorbed you become in your work."
"What do you want?" she whispered. God, where were Sarah and Sonja?
Andrew shrugged. "Just to say hello." He paused, looking into the face he'd used and betrayed. His face contorted in pain as he whispered, "I'm sorry, Becca."
"For what?" she snapped. "Using me like a cheap whore?"
"That, and … a lot of other things, too. Just know that I really am sorry for everything."
"Get out of my church."
"Last time I looked, it was God's house, not yours, but I'll be going. "
Becca had the grace to be ashamed by her words. "Andrew-"
"No, you're right, I was wrong to come here. I just wanted … I wanted to see you one last time."
"You're leaving?" she asked almost hopefully.
Andrew smiled thinly. "I suppose you could say that. Anyway, I won’t be around here much longer." He looked her over one last time. "Have a nice life, Becca." Without another word he turned to leave. As he passed through the entryway, he bumped into a tall young man, blonde and exceptionally good looking. Andrew had the fleeting thought that he would be perfect for Becca. Shaking his head to rid himself of the errant thought, he made his way slowly to the taxi that was waiting on the corner.
******
The five boys and Aaron made their way down the side aisle to the places Becca had set aside for them. They looked around in awe. The church was splendid! Full boughs of pine swags hung from the vaulted ceiling, draping across the sanctuary and there were candles everywhere. The entire altar area was filled with bright red poinsettias, which surrounded the antique crèche. As the choir began to take their places, Sarah and Sonja searched the congregation for Howie & Brian. Finally they spotted them about a third of the way back on their right. As inconspicuously as they could, they waved to get their attention. Laughing, Brian and Howie waved back as Nick pushed his way to a seat on the center aisle. Ever since he and Brian had heard Becca and Sonja practicing, he'd been looking forward to this night. It was something he couldn't explain, and Kevin & AJ would have laughed at him, but he had a feeling that his life was about to change.
The lights dimmed as the organ began to play softly. The sounds of age old Christmas carols filled the church and it felt like home. To those gathered there, it didn't matter if they'd been there every week for the past twenty years of if they'd simply arrived looking for a safe haven from the night, they were surrounded by a sense of belonging and peace. Each of the boys found themselves deep in thought as the sounds and smells evoked memories of holidays past. The familiar words of scripture told the ancient story and they found their lips moving along with the familiar passages.
Sarah's solo was amazing, and Howie watched her with fierce pride as she sang. Sonja's voice floated above the choir and Brian hummed along with the old carol, a smile on his face. The service was drawing to a close when Becca stepped forward. The lights were dimmed to mere candlelight and the chamber orchestra began to play. Nick held his breath, scooting forward to the edge of his seat and craning his neck for a better view.
She was so beautiful. Dressed simply in a deep blue choir robe, he watched her prepare herself and thought back to all they'd been through. He remembered her fears, her insecurities; he remembered the first time they'd made love, the way she'd trusted him implicitly with her heart and her body and his heart swelled. A tear rolled down his face, and he was beyond caring who saw it.
Becca breathed deeply and began to sing. The soft melody flowed from her heart in praise and as she sang, she smiled gently. The words were timeless to the song that was her signature piece with the choir and, like every other Christmas Eve, she was swept away by the music.
Brian watched Nick watching Becca and he knew instinctively how the night would end. Nick's face held an expression he'd never seen there before. He was watching Becca sing and tears rolled unheeded down his face. Brian moved closer, putting his arm around his best friend. Nick wiped his eyes hurriedly, never taking his eyes away from Becca, but finding the wherewithal to lean against Brian for support.
Absentmindedly, he twisted the ring on his middle finger as he listened to the choir sing behind her. Then, as if suddenly making the connection between the two, he looked briefly at his hand, then back at Becca. Brian watched, transfixed as the emotions played over Nick's face and he seemed to reach a peace within himself.
Silently he nudged Howie, who began to watch in rapt fascination.
"Wow," Howie mouthed at Brian, who nodded his head in response.
By now, they had the attention of the rest of the group who tried their best to see what was going on without disturbing the rest of the churchgoers. The music swelled to a climax and as Becca's voice soared to the highest note of the piece, Nick smiled, his eyes drifting closed as he let the music carry him away. He remained that way for the remainder of the service. The final blessing was pronounced and the congregation filed out to the strains of "Silent Night".
The church was almost empty, and still Nick remained. Brian and Howie had some sense of what was happening, even if they weren't sure enough to put it into words, and so they steered everyone else away, leaving Nick with his thoughts. Sarah and Sonja were ready to leave, and gladly hugged their guys accepting their well-deserved praise for a beautiful performance. Finally Becca emerged, shuffling her music and stacking it to be stored for another year. Her hair hung loosely about her shoulders, and she was still wearing her choir robe, although she had unzipped it and it hung open in the front. Absently, she looked around, spotting the majority of the group off to the side, but not Nick. She gazed out over the empty church to find him still seated where the others had left him. Tipping her head curiously to the side, she cast him a questioning look. Slowly he pulled himself to his feet and walked up the center aisle toward her.
Becca was so unsure of herself. Nick had a strange look on his face, a very intense look, and it made her nervous. Did he like what he heard? Did she suck? What? She had no idea that he'd heard her once before, at her house. She moved the music stand out of the way and walked to meet him halfway having no idea what was about to occur.
They stopped, midway through the church, and stood facing each other a foot apart.
"Nick?" Becca asked softly, tipping her head back and looking into his eyes. Only then did she notice the traces of tears on his face. She reached a hand up to wipe them away, and as she did, he brought her hand to his lips, kissing the palm and tasting the salty residue.
Without further hesitation, he pulled her close, one arm behind her back, the other hand tangling in her hair to angle her face just the right way for his kiss. It seemed in slow motion that he lowered his mouth to hers, and in all the time they'd been together Becca had never felt the depth of passion that Nick was showing her now. His mouth moved over hers firmly, taking her breath away. He kissed her long and deep, in spite of the fact that they were in the middle of a church.
Becca held him close, kissing him back with every bit of love she could muster, completely unaware of the small band of spectators huddled in the front of the church.
Nick wrenched his mouth away from hers. Gasping for breath, he leaned his forehead against hers.
"I can't do this any more, Bec."
"Nick-" she gasped, her stomach lurching in horror. "Please-"
"No, I can't go on this way. We're leaving in less than a month, Becca. I'm going on the road without you and I can't continue like this."
Becca was confused and horrified, and the tears steamed down her face. God, how could he do this to her, especially on Christmas Eve? Her world was falling apart and she had no way to stop it. She caught her breath and a sob escaped before she could catch herself.
"Baby?" Nick looked at her, really *looked* at her for the first time since speaking. The look on her face broke his heart and belatedly he realized the mistake he'd just made. "Oh God," he groaned, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close. "No Becca, stop." He kissed her once again for reassurance and set her away at arm's length. "I'm screwing this up, I'm such a dork sometimes."
Becca wiped her eyes and sniffled loudly, more confused than ever.
"I need to know that you'll be waiting for me. I need to know that I have something worth coming home to, someone that will be there for me any time I call. I need that person to be you, Becca. I was watching you tonight, and I thought about all we've been through," he paused and sighed. "I can't imagine my life without you in it. Ever."
Becca looked up at him in wonder, afraid to even anticipate where this was leading.
Nick took a deep breath and a small step back. Ducking his head shyly, he twisted the ring off his finger and took her left hand in his. "This is all I have for now. I didn't plan this, but it's right. I know it's right." As he looked into her eyes, he whispered, "Marry me, Becca. When all this is over with, be here for me. I know I have a million fans all over the world, but you're the only fan I want. Please?"
Becca was shaking. She'd never dreamed that this could ever happen to her when she used to dance to his music and dream of his babies. Just that thought made her giggle and before he could take back what he'd said, she whispered, "Yes."
Once again they were in each other's arms as Nick spun her about and kissed her soundly.
Howie looked at Brian. "Did he just-"
Brian grinned. "Yep."
Aaron shook his head. "Mom's gonna be pissed."
"No shit," added AJ.
"Shut up, moron, you're in church." Kevin whapped AJ upside the head, and Aaron ducked, expecting the same fate.
Sarah and Sonja had watched the entire scene unfold and stood with their mouths open. When it finally registered that Nick had proposed and Becca had accepted, they threw themselves at each other shrieking, "OHMYGOD!"
Nick and Becca were too wrapped up in each other to notice, but Brian caught sight of the custodian hovering in the background, probably anxious to lock up and get home to his family. "Ya'll wait here," he said to the others.
Becca and Nick were in their own little world when they heard a sound behind them.
Brian cleared his throat. "Umm, I hate to interrupt, but it's late and we need to clear outta here. The custodian would really like to get home for Christmas with his family."
Becca giggled. "It's Christmas, Nick."
"Yeah, so it is," he smiled. "Merry Christmas, baby." He leaned forward to kiss her again and Brian groaned.
"Go home, you two. Look, I’m gonna take Aaron with me so you can have some privacy, ok?"
"You'd do that?" Nick asked.
"You know it. I think you need this night together without any distractions."
Becca hugged Brian. "Thank you so much."
"Just be good to my best friend here, ok?" Brian looked at Becca. "I'm really happy for you both, Bec. Welcome to the family."
Becca leaned against Nick, and he held her close saying, "Tell the guys we'll see them tomorrow night, ok? We're gonna slip away."
"No problem. I'll bring A.C. over around noon."
*********
Becca struggled with the lock on her front door for a good three minutes before Nick took the keys away and opened it himself. As she started to step though the doorway, he swept her up in his arms and carried her in.
"WHAT are you doing?" she laughed.
"Just practicing." He grinned a cocky little grin and set her down.
Becca grinned back. "Nick?"
"What, baby?"
"We're getting married."
"I know."
"Oh God."
"Uh huh." He grinned again.
Becca shrieked, jumping up and hanging onto him with her arms around his neck and her legs wrapped around his waist. "I love you" she kissed his forehead, "so much" she kissed his eyes. "Take me upstairs" she kissed his neck, "and make love to me." Her lips met his once again and Nick was surprised when Becca parted her lips to touch her tongue to his.
His body tightened in anticipation and he held her closer, her hips pressed close against his own. "Bec," he groaned, "I can't carry you like this, I'll never make it."
Becca carefully unwrapped her legs and slid down his front, making sure her body made intimate contact with his all the way. "Nick?" she whispered.
He cupped her face in his hands. "Yeah, sweetheart?" he whispered.
Placing her hands against his chest, she whispered, "Race ya!" Shoving hard, she pushed him away and ran up the stairs.
He was so taken by surprise that he stood there, stunned. "Witch," he grinned, and took the stairs two at a time. By the time he arrived in her bedroom, she had stripped to her bra and panties and was lighting a candle on the dresser. He skidded to a halt in the doorway, content to look his fill.
"Took you long enough," she said over her shoulder. "What are you waiting for?"
"Just enjoying the view," he replied with a grin.
"Not much of a view from over *here*. You're wearing entirely too many clothes, Carter."
"So come help me take them off." He smirked at her, his grin disappearing when her fingers reached for the buttons on his dress shirt.
Slowly, with painstaking precision, she undid each button, gently smoothing out the fabric after each one. When she reached the lowest one, she shook her head. "Tsk, these pants are way too tight. Can't seem to untuck the shirt …" Methodically she pulled open his belt, unsnapping his slacks and stepping back. "Well, that looks better. A little." Grasping the sides of his shirt, she pulled it out of his pants leaving him looking very rumpled.
"Becca," he groaned.
"Now, Nick, where's your sense of adventure?" She pushed the shirt over his shoulders and he helped her tug it over his wrists and toss it to the floor.
"Better?" he asked.
"Almost," she murmured. "Just a little more." Somehow she managed to pull down his zipper without actually touching anything beneath it, but even so, he shuddered. "Easy, big boy," she teased, reaching her hand inside and cupping his hardness through his boxers. He swelled beneath her fingers and she whispered, "oh, my…"
Pushing his slacks to the floor, she laughed when they tangled on his shoes and he nearly fell over. "Oops, guess we forgot something." Kneeling in front of him, she lifted each foot in turn, carefully removing his shoes and socks and setting them aside. Then she held his hand and helped him balance as he stepped out of the puddle of fabric that used to be his neatly pressed pants. He stood before her, wearing only his boxers, and she looked up at him from her place on the floor.
Nick touched her hair, weaving his fingers through the silken strands as he watched every emotion that flitted across her beautiful face. Softly, gently, she laid her cheek against him, wrapping her arms around his hips and breathing in his scent. Reaching for her hands, he pulled her to her feet and pressed a soft kiss to her mouth. He reached one finger under the thin strap of her bra, pulling it just off her shoulder to dangle against her arm and gently kissed the slight indentation in her shoulder where the strap had lain all day. As he licked the same spot, he removed the other strap in much the same way. He licked and nibbled at her shoulder and Becca shivered.
One finger traced across the fallen strap and followed the lacy top of her bra, causing goose bumps to cover her chest and Nick chuckled at her reaction, dipping his finger into the valley between her breasts. He slowly removed his finger and ran it over her breast, finding and flicking her nipple that had hardened beneath the pale pink silk.
Becca sighed, closing her eyes and holding onto his back for support. She felt the popping of the front clasp as it gave way beneath his fingers and shivered once more as the cool winter air touched her naked flesh. His hands were so gentle as he pulled her bra off, tossing it in the corner with his clothes and then returning to cup her breasts in his large hands. She moaned as he rubbed his thumbs over her nipples, pressing them in just a bit. It was all she could do not to cry out as he dipped his head to take one tight peak in his lips, his tongue laving it gently just before his teeth grazed it lightly. He gave the other side the same treatment and she was putty in his hands.
Nick pushed her toward the bed, easing her down upon the soft comforter and crawling up beside her. He kissed her face and then her neck. His hands squeezed her breasts as he kissed the soft flesh beneath her arm. His lips once again suckled at her breast and his hand stroked the flat plane of her tummy, just barely grazing the elastic edge of her panties. He felt her shift her hips restlessly and knew what she wanted.
"Nick, please?" she pleaded, her fingers tangling in his hair as he dipped his tongue into her belly button.
Slowly he slid his hand beneath the elastic, parting the moist folds between her thighs with his fingers. He stroked her slowly, spreading her wetness up and over the tight, hidden bud beneath the soft curls and then she *did* cry out. He felt her shudder beneath his touch as her hips rose from the bed and he moved to her feet. Reaching for the elastic band at her hips, he pulled her panties down her legs and off, and spread her thighs with his hands. Softly he inhaled, savoring her unique scent, and then parted the moist folds with his fingers. Becca was soaked, more than ready for him and he blew a cool breath against her exposed flesh making her tremble in his hands. Slowly, God, so slowly, he touched her with his tongue, dipping quickly inside her and then drawing it slowly upward to swirl against the hidden button. She quivered and he did it again, and again until she was on the very brink of her release and then he pulled away leaving her dangling at the edge.
He stood quickly, shedding his boxers and then returning to her side. He took her hand, pulling her upward to meet his kiss, his hot erection pressing against her belly. As they kissed, she touched him. She wrapped her fingers around him, stroking him steadily in mere imitation of what was to come and then suddenly he pushed her away. He twisted her body around until she was before him, on her hands and knees, and he was poised behind her. Slowly he rubbed himself against her wetness, coating himself with her juices and pressing against her.
Becca took a deep breath and as she felt him press slowly into her body, she expelled it all in a moan of bliss. He pushed into her more, and he was so deep that she knew she would die from the sensation. Instinctively she pushed back against him and he was there, buried deep within her body and god it was wonderful. Slowly they began to move together and apart, each sure stroke taking her higher than the last.
Their movements became frantic and suddenly Nick sat back on his heels, pulling Becca with him to lean her back against his chest. He swelled and pulsed within her and as he rocked against her again, he wrapped one arm around her chest for balance as he buried his other fingers between her thighs. He could feel himself moving deep within her as he gathered moisture to spread up and over her tight bud. He was almost there, and he was determined that Becca would be there too. Quickly and firmly he stroked over her flesh, finally grasping the knot of flesh between his forefinger and thumb and tugging gently.
Becca threw her head back onto his shoulder and cried out as her orgasm rushed over her body, her muscles clenching around him as he pumped into her. She began to come down, and then Nick pushed her forward to her knees yet again as he slammed against her and came, his seed flowing into her body and onto the comforter beneath. Becca's knees gave out and they collapsed together, Nick pressing hot kisses to her back as he struggled to breathe.
They lay together this way for long minutes, until finally he softened, slipping from her body with a rush of wetness. The night air was cool, and they moved only to slip beneath the covers and spoon together once more.
The candles had burned themselves out as Nick whispered, "I love you."
Almost asleep, Becca smiled and murmured, "Me, too."
"Merry Christmas, Bec."
She sighed and was asleep in seconds.