TRUE STORY #5
Fifteen Minutes Of Fume
Being a Monday, a lucrative day, I had gotten off my lazy ass to deliver at least three times
today at work: once to deliver something (a sales report or something) next door, once again to
go to lunch, and once more to take my post-lunch poop.Now, as if I don't spend enough of my time
on my ass doing shit, I would spend the next fifteen minutes on my ass making shit.
So, like when I go into my usual stall... there's like someone next door to me. "Oh well," I figure,
"Like Willy Wonka's Chocolate factory, no one sees me go in, no one sees me come out." Ok, so that's
part of where I went wrong. See, aside from homegirl next door, someone was at the sink. Ok, how was
I to know the girl at the sink just got out of the shower (cos we have one in the bathroom at work)
and how was I also to have known that homegirl next door was like an old friend of the chick at the
sink?!?! So, just my luck, right? I figure, "They'll be gone soon." So I just take my dump. They
don't leave. They talk about about jogging and kids!!! Like don't you people work or anything?!?!
So... finally, I finished and debated leaving or waiting. I then figure, like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, no one sees me go in, no one sees me come out. Ok, so thats part of where I went wrong. See, aside from homegirl next door, someone was at he sink. Ok, how was I to know that the girl at the sink just got outta the shower (cos we have one in the bathroom at work) and how was I also to know that homegirl next door was like an old friend of the girl at the sink?!?! So, just my luck, right? I figure, they'll be gone soon, so I just take my dump. They don't leave. They talk about jogging and kids!!! Like don't you people work or anything?!?!? So.... I just finish and debate leaving or waiting. I then figure, ok, I'll go. So I leave... I make a quiet exit and leave the scene of the crime before they got a whiff of the fumes. I guess this just goes to show you can't take a dump peacefully at work.
THE END
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