Something not thought of? Natalie laughed
in her mind. Nick, himself, was something not thought of! Or so she would
have said four years ago, before he had ended up on a slab in her laboratory.
But personal experience was the mother of invention and she knew more now
about the dark shadowy world of the supernatural than most of the busy
beaver researchers might imagine even possible.
Down one / Top / Bottom She knew also, even mired in that abyss,
there was at least one who still believed there was hope of escape from
the world of the undead. There was, now, room for doubt that the soul of
man could be so damned, he could not rise above that which would eke out
every ounce of purity. She knew Nick.
As the lights came on, most of the lecturers began mingling with
the guests. Natalie glanced at the young man sitting to her left, who also
remained seated. He smiled at her.
"That was good." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "I'm glad I was able to make it tonight. I'm actually very excited
by the next speaker," he said enthusiastically.
"I am too," Natalie agreed. "Though I have so much work to do,
that taking this time feels more like playing hooky."
"I know what you mean. What are you particularly interested in?"
Natalie laughed. "I had thought to get a crash course on the
new genetics research," she said, digging in her bag for an article she
had brought on the subject. She handed it to the young man.
"Oh, yes, chromosome reversal," he said, glancing at the paper.
"Quite controversial." he handed back the article. Natalie nodded, feeling
very much out of her element. Work on the living had never been of interest
since her residency. Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "We've actually been doing quite a bit on that very subject."
He pulled a card from his briefcase and handed it to Natalie. "My name
is John Cranford. Dr. John Cranford. I'm with
GenSearch." They shook hands.
"Dr. Natalie Lambert. I've been interested in learning more about
this for quite a while," she offered, hoping to get a foot in the door
here. "My field is forensics, but a new venture has brought me out, off
the Night shift and into the world of the living."
"Actually so much can be learned from your population, dead as
they may be." Dr. Cranford laughed, then looked at Natalie seriously. "Have
you seen our facility?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "I can give you a tour and perhaps we can talk a little more
about what each field has to offer the other."
"Oh, I don't have time this evening," Natalie said, automatically
side stepping the possible issue of getting to know someone.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean today. I was thinking Saturday, perhaps."
Natalie glanced at him a moment. What was wrong with her? Here
was a very nice young man offering to shed some light on the very thing
in which she was interested, which she had come to learn more about this
evening and she was pushing it aside for what? Because he smiled at her?
"Okay." She relented. "Saturday!" The lectures resumed, both scientists becoming absorbed in the
material. When the evening was over, Natalie noticed that John Cranford
had already gone. She set her own briefcase down on his seat to put on
her coat, noticing that the young geneticist had left a book behind. She
picked it up, glancing at the title: "A Return To Forever." Tucking the
book inside her bag, she decided she would call tomorrow to let him know
she'd found his book and would return it by messenger if he needed it before
Saturday. That evening, at home curled up on her couch, she poured over
her notes from the evening's talks, scribbling in a journal she had reserved
for her work with Nick. There might be something there, she thought, as
she read the premise for the fifteenth time. What if it was really possible
to help Nick on a genetic level?
When she felt that her brain could absorb
no more, she placed all her work back in its folders and the folders in
the file box and settled back with a cup of tea. Saturday seemed so far
away. She looked around her living room remembering all the times Nick
had been there, wishing he was there now and that persistent ache began
to rise to the surface. Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom This is what she needed, light, distracting reading. With growing interest,
she learned that Gellman felt he had developed a way to travel back in
time. And although Natalie knew it was pure fiction, she couldn't help
her desire to believe it was true. Her mind wandered back to Nick. What
if he could go back to the time before LaCroix? What if he had never been
made into the man trapped in the monster's body? She sighed. What a fantasy! Natalie sat back in her chair and wondered about such absurdities.
But then, she realized, it was harder now to honestly dismiss anything
since the advent of Nick in her life. If he was real, then couldn't time
travel be real? Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom Saturday morning was sunny and mild. Natalie
left the office early the night before, to get rest so she would feel refreshed
for the day ahead. John Cranford met her for breakfast downtown. "It just
seems so...." Natalie searched for the word. She and Dr. Cranford were
sitting in the corner of a small eatery.
"Unbelievable?" Cranford finished
for her. Natalie nodded. They were talking about the book, which she handed
over to him when they met earlier.
"I think belief is the exact word which
is needed during this process." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom Natalie raised an inquisitive eyebrow
at her companion, her scientific mind seeking purchase on the precept which
had been placed before her. Dr. Cranford had informed her that the book
was actually and truly ongoing research. The book had not gone into the
intricacies of the "transformation," as Gellman called it. It only detailed
the steps which took place, according to him, in the experimental setting.
"You are claiming the possibility that the mind can transport us back in
time; not simply in MIND, but in body as well. Only there doesn't seem
to be any evidence previously to substantiate that."
"If the consciousness
can be regressed, then why not the body?" Cranford began, holding up his
hand when Natalie attempted to interject an argument. "It is simply a matter
of convincing... no, redirecting the molecules that they are in a concurrent
universe which exists simultaneously with our day and time; an alternate
universe, if you will, since they are all constantly evolving at the same
time." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "Well,I see what you are getting at, but there is no corroborative
evidence which confirms the existence of this possibility."
"Each concept has been in
exactly this position at one time or another. And all it took was for an
open mind to bring its truth out of the closet into the open light of
day."
"How many actual trials have been done successfully?" Natalie asked,
finding her mind was beginning to embrace the possibilities. As it turned
out, Gellman and Cranford were colleagues and were involved in a number
of alternative projects.
"Quite a few, actually, though none for which
we could actually publish the findings at the moment." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "We have
had some unexpected side effects," Cranford explained, though he seemed
reluctant to divulge what these were.
Natalie sat for a few moments, digesting
the information.
"Is there danger involved?" She had to ask.
"There is
always danger."
"What sort?"
"Mostly the subject remaining in a catatonic
state upon return, as if the mind still remained in the past."
"So they
returned in body but not in mind?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "But during
the process, the body actually.... disappears?"
"In a manner of speaking. The body is but a shell, one configuration of molecules holding another
set of molecules; those of the life-force within. The body lies in a sort
of death state. Still, reports that the person actually experienced physicality
in their past have also come back, with supporting physical evidence from
that moment in time to which they had revisited."
"What supporting evidence?"
Natalie asked.
"Trinkets. Things they had not previously 'taken' with them." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "Do you think it could be that the subjects who remained 'behind'
did so out of a desire to not return, or was there something which you
feel disallowed their return? Some unforeseen predicament?"
"Those are
the areas we do not yet have answers for, Dr. Lambert." Cranford called
the waitress over and asked for the check. "Shall we go to the laboratory
and see some of the things which have been brought across?" The laboratory was housed in a pristine building amid the older Northern
architecture. As they passed through the outer doors they entered a world
which struck Natalie as the archetype for the science fiction writer's
imagined domain. John slid a card through a security checkpoint, much the
way one scans a credit card at the grocery store; certainly something which
was becoming more and more prevalent in modern day society. It was the
next step which brought her to mind of any number of high tech scenarios:
John Cranford placed the palm of his hand over a plate which then turned
from a red glow to a green one, the clicking of a door as it opened indicating
that he was identified correctly.
"Rather stringent security," Natalie
commented as she was ushered into a corridor. Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom Natalie considered the
fact that she was possibly in the hands of a madman, but couldn't entirely
dismiss the validity of what he was implying, knowing, as she did, the
lengths to which the members of Nick's dark world went to protect themselves
from detection and infiltration. They passed rooms filled with medical
equipment, and others set up as small houses with living and sleeping quarters;
each representative of a very different time and place, where she imagined
the actual experimental process began. Halfway down the hall, they entered
an office with Randolf Gellman's name inscribed on the door. An older gentleman
was seated behind a large mahogany desk. He gestured toward a chair, into
which Natalie settled herself, noting that this was the only room which
resembled the present, its furnishings almost mundane in comparison to
all else within the building.
"Dr. Natalie Lambert," Cranford introduced.
"This is Dr. Randolf Gellman." The older gentleman bowed slightly. "Nice
to finally meet you, Dr. Lambert." Gellman said, extending his hand across
the desk to Natalie.
"Does my reputation precede me?" Natalie asked. "Actually,
yes." Gellman responded. He asked John Cranford if he had explained the
nature of their work to Natalie.
"Well," Cranford began, "she was expecting
to see the genetics lab today." He placed the book on the desk. "But we've
been talking about your work in here, since breakfast."
"So?" Gellman arched
an eyebrow in question. "What are your thoughts on the matter, Dr. Lambert?"
"There is so much I don't really understand," Natalie said. "Not to mention,
as Dr. Cranford has already done, I was actually more interested in your
other research."
"Well, this has the real potential." Gellman tapped the
cover of his book. "This is why we wanted you to see our facility." "I am interested in the progress you are making in..." Gellman
interrupted, guiding her back to his own agenda. "You're interested in
helping find the cure."
"What?" Natalie asked, unsure of what she'd heard.
"For something you've come across in your own research."
"Well yes. The
genetic reversal."
"My dear woman, your interest lies in the wrong arena."
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't your work in genetics the reason I
was invited?"
"It was a way to, how shall I say this, get you to see other
possibilities, beyond even that." "Genetics can only really help the living."
"Of course." Natalie began to feel uneasy
with the direction of the conversation, but did not know how to gracefully
withdraw from it.
"And your work is with death."
"Well, my general work."
"Or to be more precise, the desire to regenerate life."
Natalie started
to protest, but Gellman gestured for her to hold her thought. "You will find more success in our time travel work," Gellman explained.
"As I was telling Dr. Cranford, that is really more far fetched than I can find plausible."
Natalie looked at Gellman. "Assuming
what you have is valid, why do you trust me with your information?" It
suddenly occurred to her that if they went to all the trouble of keeping
the public out of their business, what about her was less threatening?
Gellman pulled out a folder, placing it on the desk in front of Natalie.
"We've looked into your work, Dr. Lambert."
"Forensics?" Natalie picked
up the folder and opened it.
"We have already explained. It is your other
research," Gellman said, as if it was a well known fact that Natalie was
helping a vampire to regain his mortality. Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "Where did you get this?" Her voice became indignant.
"As I said, we did our homework." Gellman smiled. "And before you take
exception, please understand that my only interest is purely for research
purposes."
"But this is personal!" Natalie protested. "My personal life.
How could that have anything which would interest you?"
"Personal, though
it may be, we do know that you are working to find a "cure" for a condition which this man has, of which most homosapiens are unaware." Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "Please
Dr. Lambert," Gellman said, his voice apologetic. "But when you agreed
to visit, didn't you think we'd have to know with whom we were dealing?"
Natalie continued her silence, staring down at Nick's picture, wishing
that she now had confided in him before she left. A finger of fear touched
her heart, not for herself, but for Nick and his friends who lived on the
fringe of society.
"We have known about this condition, you know." Gellman
finally said.
"I'm afraid I don't know what you are talking about."
"Dr. Lambert, if I am to be honest with you, share what I have with you to help
you, can't you at least do me the same courtesy?" She began to gather up her belongings,
reluctantly placing the folder on Gellman's desk.
"Let me tell you something,
Dr. Lambert, which I think will change your mind. Let me tell you what
I DO know. Your friend lives in a world of darkness and shadow, because
he left the mortal realm many hundreds of years ago. He, unlike many of
his fellow night crawlers, wishes to rise above his current nature; to
return to his prior way of life."
Natalie sat back down, feeling at the
same time numb with uncertainty and a surge of excitement building deep
within as she began to ponder the immensity of what she had stumbled across.
She started to speak, and stopped herself, knowing that she must never
reveal what she knew. Yet she was within a budding flower of an idea, possibilities
spilling forth from a fathomless font. Assuming these people knew about
vampires, and assuming that they had no evil intent against the
community, how could they help? What was the exact nature of this revelation? Natalie measured her words carefully. "I want to
understand the implication here." She watched him, waiting for his response.
"Which implication?"
"First, what you feel you know about my friend, and
second, how you feel your specific methods can help him."
"I believe I
just told you what I know about your friend."
"That could describe anything..."
Natalie began to say, trying to find the traps in HIS words.
"No it can't,
Dr. Lambert. It describes only one possibility. Vampirism." "And the second part is that, if he truly wants to become mortal
again, we have the only possible answer to that."
"Tell me," Natalie implored. "Tell me and I will confirm what you believe you already know."
"In truth, the ONLY way to become mortal again, for Nicholas Knight, or for anyone, actually, is for him to return to the time BEFORE he was brought over. With his current knowledge of the consequences of that night, he could very well avoid that circumstance which brought him face to face with only one possible destiny."
"You mean return to 1228?" Natalie blurted it out before she could stop herself. "And if he COULD avoid certain factions, he could live his life out, normally and
die a mortal death?"
"Yes."
Suddenly her head was flooded with all the
consequences of such an action. He would have everything he always wanted!
He would have his LIFE back! He would have... what? The people he had spent
the last seven hundred plus years with and those with whom he had come
to know in this incarnation of his immortal coil as champion of lost causes,
would all be lost to him. She would be lost to him. And worse, he would
be lost to her! Oh God! I don't know what to do! Natalie looked up at Gellman.
"What do you get out of it all?" Natalie asked. "What is that, Dr. Gellman?"
"If one truly
does return, completely, and fully."
"But how would you know that? If he
stayed back in the past you would never know for sure."
"But the fact
of his physically remaining there would be proof."
"Even if that was true,
and even if I was willing to admit what you believe about him to be true,
how do you suggest we get him to agree to go through with this?"
"Because
he wants it. Because he would listen to you." "Toronto's underbelly does not always maintain its strict silence, you
know. And you are not the only mortal who has intimate knowledge of their
world. Besides, as we will keep your knowledge confidential, we also keep
our other sources in confidence."
"Okay. I'll accept that right now." Natalie's
mind was awhirl with thoughts and potentialities, wanting only to push
on to a conclusion she could understand and work with. She suddenly felt
as if time was running out on her.
Gellman studied Natalie. "What can I
do to help convince you to work with us? I sense you are being cautious
here. Understandably, of course, since we are dealing with a work of such
uncertainty."
"How can I best understand what happens?" Natalie asked.
"What?" Natalie had not expected that. "I... well, I
don't know." "What have you got to lose?" "Well, according to you, myself." "As a scientist, doesn't it intrigue you at all?" "Of course it does!" Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom She looked at Randolf Gellman. "This is
my lab!"
"Down to the letter." Gellman admitted.
"I don't get it."
"Don't you?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom Gellman smiled, almost sheepishly. "I didn't think anything else would convince you."
Walking, as if actually
back in her own office, Natalie inspected the details. Everything was there:
books, pictures, case files, everything! She turned, stunned, but unable
to voice her thoughts. Her eyes held his gaze, trying to see beyond the
mask. Who was this man?
"When Officer Knight showed up at your office for
the first time," Gellman started, pointing to the stainless steel coroner's
table, "can you recall every detail about that day?"
Natalie stammered,
"I... I.... Of course! I'll never forget that day!"
"Tell me, then. Exactly
what you found. Where you were. Everything."
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "I think you're ready." Gellman said, guiding her
to a chair, helping her to sit. Taking her belongings, and asking her to
put on a lab coat, he instructed her to close her eyes, and she did, unable
to resist. Gellman spoke a few words suggesting relaxation.
At first Natalie
thought she was simply going over the story in her mind, hearing her own
voice repeating the same words she'd just related to Gellman. She could
feel a cool rush of air, and heard the air conditioner switch on... Voices
filtered in from somewhere and she heard Eddie's voice, the ME's driver,
telling her, "not much of a face to look at." Then a ringing phone, and
her own voice saying she'd give a report. Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom "It isn't so bad. Not so bad at all," she
heard herself say as she surveyed the body. Time started to flash by in
a kind of fast forward, as if she was pressing that button on the remote
for her vcr. She went back to the phone to report that there must have
been a mistake and was startled when the body arose from the table. Then
she was asking who he was; what he was. He was telling her she didn't need
to know. He was opening the bag of plasma from the lab fridge and drinking it.
And then he was gone, but his attempt to make her forget about him had
failed, because the memory of him remained like the scent of perfume that still lingers in the air. "Dr. Lambert? Can you hear me?"
She opened her eyes. The lab was still there, but she knew it
wasn't real. Randolf Gellman was sitting next to her. He was smiling.
"What do you think?" he asked.
"About what?"
"Your trip?" "I didn't go anywhere. It was a dream; a memory." He was a very good hypnotist, she thought to
herself. "A regression."
"Would you mind letting me see what is in your
pocket?"
Natalie looked down at the lab coat, then searched the pockets
for whatever it was he thought she had. Her hand stopped as it touched
the rigid rim of plastic. She pulled it out and her breath caught. It was
the bag! The blood plasma bag--the one she'd taken home that night to prove
to herself what she had experienced was real;the one she kept still to
always remember an endless moment in the night;the one hidden away at
home, in a box of other souvenirs she had collected over the years! Main Page / Back one / Top / Chapter One / Chapter Two / Chapter Three / Chapter Four / Chapter Five / Chapter Six / Chapter Seven / Chapter Eight / Chapter Nine / Chapter Ten / Chapter Eleven / Chapter Twelve / Chapter Thirteen / Chapter Fourteen By Javier Vachon. Updated 8/10/2004
She knew there were creatures
of the night which previously lurked only in the imagination of writers
and movie makers. She knew there was life for some beyond the grave; life
gained only through another kind of death, where the very core of the unfortunate
victim was stripped of its humanity, leaving a mere shell, housing, now,
only the bestiality that was the essence of a depravity more unthinkable
than any horror novel could offer.
"Yeah." Natalie nodded.
"I was hoping it might add to my storehouse of knowledge with
regards the possible ramifications of genetic mutations and aggressive
behavioral patterns." As she spoke, Natalie got the sense that she was
on a tennis court, fielding questions with the finesse of a pro, in a world
with which she had only a nodding acquaintance.
"No, I'm sorry."
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"Don't go there, Nat!" she warned herself and reached
for the book which Cranford had left behind. At first glance Natalie thought
it was a work of fiction, a second in a series of books written by an author
with whom she was not at all familiar. The jacket claimed it was by the
renowned author of the book, entitled, tongue in cheek, she was sure, "Back
to the Future." Randolf Gellman. Natalie shrugged, and opened the cover.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Returning to the pages of the book, she read that the technique, one which
she was sure she had seen in a movie years ago, was concerned more with
a mind over matter process than with the possibility of physical return.
Or was it? The author contended that it was quite possible to transport
the self back to another time, providing a person was in the place to which
one wished to return. It was a process which required an absolute belief
in the possibility of return. It was a process which required one to be
immersed in that moment of the past in every manner possible, from clothing,
and furniture, down to the most minor detail; use of only the money of
the time, and dispensing with anything which might be considered present
day.
"Oh, get a grip, Nat!!!" she exclaimed. "Anyway just what
purpose would it serve," she asked herself. And that was her stumbling
block. How could she believe that this might be a key to Nick's desire
to be human again? How could that make one bit of difference? Turning to
the back of the book, Natalie glanced at the author's bio: "...lives in
Toronto with wife and children." Toronto... Right here in her own city...
A crazy man with a crazy idea!
"Okay. Let's assume that I believe. That
still doesn't explain how it works."
"Are you talking about quantum physics?" Natalie asked, an inkling
of recognition for a scientific theorem she had briefly studied coming
to her from a hiding place within her mind. Cranford was nodding.
"Why?"
Cranford nodded. "We sense a refusal
of the subject to return to his or her current surroundings."
Natalie sat quietly for a few moments. This was all too astonishing, if
it was true. A smile came to her lips as she thought of an old television
show she had seen several times, about a scientist who traveled through
the various aspects of the universe, inhabiting people's bodies as he made
his way through the quantum worlds. But that was pure fantasy. Then again,
the same thing was thought of the many volumes of stories about vampires,
and Natalie had to admit that nothing was out of the realm of possibility
any longer.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
The words made
Natalie's heart skip a beat. It was as if she was being drawn into a world
BY that very world. Could it be possible that a real WAY was being shown
to her? Were there limits to what she would do for Nick, she wondered?
"Well, we have to be cautious,
considering the consequences of anyone who does not understand the potential
we have here getting ahold of this. It would put our very existence in
jeopardy; our present as we know it, and the future of our species. Any
change historically, could be disastrous for us."
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"I don't think I understand." Natalie felt confused. Did she mistake the
purpose for her visit?
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"What other possibilities?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"Yes, yes, it is. But then you also must admit that what you are doing
would be considered far fetched? Oh, I know these are difficult ideas to
grasp. And I certainly will be more than happy to help clarify any of the
salient points regarding the research."
"Other?" Natalie gave her most
innocent expression, but it changed as her gaze fell upon a photograph
of Nick and herself.
Natalie was stunned. But how could they know? And what implications did this have?
And what had she gotten herself into? She drew in a deep breath and leaned
further back into the chair. If she did not admit it, then he could not
prove that his assumption carried any weight. She remained silent.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Natalie stood up. "I'm
sorry, Dr. Gellman, for taking up your time, but I don't think that we have anything on which to work together."
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Gellman had paused, seeing that his guest was on the verge of saying something.
"You have questions?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Natalie looked
at her hands, searching her mind and heart for the courage to do what was
best; though not necessarily what was right. Nick's face from the photograph
stared up at her. She looked into his eyes, pleading for them to tell her
what to do.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"Yes." Gellman let that sink in.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"A subject who can withstand the journey, and once for all prove what we have always needed to know to continue with our work."
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Natalie drew in a breath,
exasperated with her indecision. "How did you come by the information you
have about my research, as you call it? How did you know about my friend?"
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
"Would you be willing to take an actual walk down memory lane, Dr. Lambert?"
Gellman suggested.
Dr. Gellman stood up. "Let me show you something. Come." He swept his arm
out toward the office door, inviting her to go with him. Natalie followed.
John Cranford remained behind. As they walked through the maze of corridors,
again, her attention was drawn toward the various seeming scenarios
each of the rooms held as they passed by. These were bits of people's pasts!
Moments from a time long gone. So near, yet so far away, came to mind.
They entered a room with chairs lining the walls; a waiting room of sorts.
Beyond, through a set of swinging doors, Natalie could see what looked
like a laboratory. Continuing on, through the doors, Natalie found herself
in very familiar surroundings.
"No... I... " she glanced at all the familiar furniture and fixtures.
"You were expecting me to do this?"
Against all her principles,
as if in a trance, Natalie found herself retelling a story she had held
in her mind as a sacred moment for years; a story she had dreamt about;
relived in moments when her ache for Nick pierced her heart so deep that
she felt she would die without him. When she finished, she could almost
see Nick as he was that day; could feel the presence she had come to embrace
with all of herself.
And she was walking, slipping
on a pair of latex gloves, and unzipping a body bag. She opened her eyes.
The form which lay on her table, still encased in the bag, had Nick's face.
She was now alone in her office, Eddie having just left. There was little
on the face of this man that indicated he'd been in an explosion, as had
been reported, just some minor abrasions, as if he'd cut himself shaving
that morning. But it did look like the sleep of death. She was not surprised
to be there, for she had lived with this moment inside her head every day
since then. It was no different than the other times she had dreamed of
it... But this wasn't a dream!
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
Natalie picked up the plastic bag Nick had suckled
and thrown at her, looking at the hole where he had opened it.
She slipped it inside her pocket and started cleaning up to leave the office.
It was her birthday, after all. Why had she thought to work late on such
a day? A weariness settled on her and she went to her desk to sit down.
Nothing seemed comprehensible. She closed her eyes, still seeing Nick in
her mind; his face; his eyes, so full of the beast.
Down one / Back one / Top / Bottom
