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| LAST CHANCE BY TIMA |
CHAPTERS 81 - 90 |
PREVIOUSLY...
Viki: Todd has never been known for doing what is in his own best interest.
Tea: He doesn't love me, Viki. If you're going to try to build my hopes up then I'm going to leave because as much as I may enjoy the feeling of thinking Todd loves me the crash to the ground when I have to face the reality that he never loved me is pretty painful.
Viki: What if I agree to try not to tell you how much I know Todd does love you and we'll just have dinner together, okay?
Tea: Okay.
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
chapter 81:
[Tea and Viki order dinner. As the food arrives, Viki receives a phone call. As Viki talks on the phone, Tea stares at the food on her plate. Viki finishes her call and notices Tea staring sadly at her food.]
Viki: That call was from the person I was planning to have dinner with.
Tea: I'll leave. I don't want to ruin your evening.
Viki: You're not. There's been a delay. If you leave now I'll be dining alone. I hope you'll stay and keep me company.
Tea: I'm not much fun to be around right now. I'm not very hungry anymore either.
Viki: Well, it certainly looks wonderful.
Tea: Todd would hate it.
Viki: Why?
Tea: I'm sorry. I shouldn't keep talking about him. I just can't seem to force my brain to stop thinking about him. I will, though. I absolutely will.
Viki: I'm curious, what would Todd have hated?
Tea: The food...the way they arrange it on the plate so artistically. He'd probably jumble it all together the second he saw it. Then, of course, he'd push aside his utensils and start picking through the food with his fingers. He especially loved to eat with his hands here where he knew that people would be particularly shocked and appalled. He really enjoyed it when he could get people to stare at him with disapproving looks.
Viki: He has tried to use his atrocious manners to get a reaction out of me many times. Don't tell him but I rather enjoy it.
Tea: Me too. At first, I was kind of embarrassed by some of it but it didn't take long before I started to appreciate it. Sometimes I wished that I could be more like him. You know, just do what I want to do without caring what other people think. When Todd left town, after our marriage disintegrated on our wedding night, everyone felt the need to tell me how horrible Todd was and what a lousy relationship we had and what an idiot I was for ever caring about or believing in him and what an even greater idiot I'd be if I still cared about him. I defended him and our relationship some of the time but mostly I let them say whatever they wanted to. I hated it, though. I felt disloyal to him, to what we had, or what I wanted us to have. Why did I feel that way? He humiliated me. He left me. Why would I feel guilty for not ostracizing myself from everyone by defending him from all of the hatred people in this town have for him? And even worse, I waited pathetically for months for him to come back.
Viki: Which he did.
Tea: But not to me.
Viki: Well, the two of you did re-connect upon his return, didn't you?
Tea: Not the way I wanted. That's not true. I wanted that. I just also wanted a lot more than that. Todd wasn't interested.
Viki: Is that why you left?
[Tea grimaces and pushes her plate toward the center of the table.]
Viki (concerned): You don't look well. Perhaps you should go to the ladies lounge and lie down.
Tea: Maybe. I'm really sorry, Viki. You caught me on a night when I'm a total mess.
Viki: There is no need to apologize.
[Viki helps Tea to a ladies room that's out of the way from the main one used by people in the dining room. Viki wants Tea to have some privacy if she's going to be sick and she also hopes that Todd will be arriving soon and she wants them to have privacy while they reconcile...if they reconcile...if Todd shows up...]
chapter 82:
In the ladies lounge at the Country Club...
Tea is lying on her back on a fancy sofa in the outer lounge of the rest room. She opens her eyes and surveys the room. They've redecorated since she used this room to dress for her second wedding to Todd. It feels like so long ago yet at the same time it feels like barely any time has passed since the best day of her life became the worst day of her life and almost the last day of her life.
Tea closes her eyes again as she's reminded of being trapped in the burning cabana on her wedding night. Todd saved her that night. He ruined her life and then he saved it and then he left it.
Images, feelings, sounds and smells of that evening invade Tea's memory. One memory in particular lingers behind Tea's closed eyes. Tea has relived that moment so many times since that night that it doesn't surprise her that it's still incredibly vivid in her mind.
An unconscious smile forms on Tea's face as she recalls sitting on the bed in the cabana while her husband sensually removed her necklace. The feeling of his hands touching her skin, his breath on her neck, his lips...
Tea's body responds to the memory the way it always does. Anytime she wants a guaranteed orgasm all she has to do is remember that moment and her body automatically responds the same way it did that night.
Tea laughs slightly at herself, thinking how pathetic it is that all a man has to do is remove her necklace and her body responds orgasmically. Well, not any man...just Todd. That wasn't just any moment, either. They were about to make love...finally. He was sitting next to her, his body against hers. His flesh was against her flesh, caressing her. He smelled so incredibly good.
Many times after he left town, Tea wondered about that moment. Was it a lie like everything else had been a lie? Her deepest instincts told her that he wasn't lying to her in that moment. That moment was real...whatever that meant.
As Tea opens her eyes again she doesn't feel like it means much of anything. Other things happened that night...horrible things. Then he left her. He had promised that he would never leave her but he did. He didn't bother to say good-bye to her. He didn't stay and keep trying to explain to her why he had deceived her. He didn't fight for her. He just left and allowed her to wonder, to worry, to hurt for so many months.
Tea's mind moves on to thoughts she usually tries not to focus on. Was he really deceiving her? Now that she knows that Viki has had suspicions all along that Todd may have really had a personality disorder she wonders if it could be true. If it is, did he get help? Is that what he was doing all those months he was gone? He hasn't revealed where he was or what he was doing. Could he have been in therapy all that time? Is it possible that she was one of the reason he returned?
Tea rolls onto her side. She's too drunk and too depressed to think clearly. Besides, she needs Todd to answer most of the questions that are bombarding her mind at the moment and he will probably never volunteer those answers to her.
Tea knows that she still wants those answers from Todd. She also knows that despite everything she still wants Todd. No matter how hard she tries to push away the feelings she still loves him and needs him even though she's convinced that he doesn't love her, never did and never will.
The tears come easily to Tea as she buries her face in the small throw pillow her head is resting on.
chapter 83:
Viki makes a quick phone call, leaves a message with the staff in the dining room for her tardy dining companion and returns to the lounge Tea is resting in. As she opens the door she can hear Tea crying.
Hearing the younger woman's sobs deeply affects Viki. She had hoped to keep some distance from the emotional situation that Todd and Tea have entangled themselves in. She finds it difficult to remain distant as she personally witnesses Tea's obvious pain.
Viki has also been observing her brother's pain over the current situation for weeks. There were no tears from Todd but Viki could tell that he was in a great deal of pain, just as Tea is now.
Viki feels like she is trapped in the middle between these two infuriating people. They both clearly love each other, it's so obvious to her. What Viki has a difficult time understanding is why it isn't obvious to them. They both are torturing themselves and each other by being apart and they're not making Viki's life any more enjoyable, either.
Viki retrieves a small box of tissues from the counter, pulls a nearby chair toward the sofa Tea is lying on and sits down. She takes several tissues from the box and offers them to Tea. As Tea dabs at her eyes with the tissue while she continues crying, Viki smoothes her former sister-in-law's hair, trying to comfort her.
Tea is trying hard to control her crying but she's finding it impossible to stop. Viki's presence is comforting to Tea but also painful since her touch is so motherly and reminds Tea that she no longer has a mother, and with her current estrangement from Carlotta she no longer has a regular surrogate mother in Llanview anymore, either.
Meanwhile, in the parking lot of the country club...
For several minutes Todd has been sitting in his car asking himself what the hell he's doing here. Viki calls and tells him to show up and he just does...why? It's over with Tea. He's put that relationship...all romantic relationships, in fact...behind him. He is through with having his heart shoved through a shredder. It's done. It's over. That's final. So, why the hell is he getting out of his car and walking toward this stupid building full of snobby people he hates?
Todd can't understand why his body is doing what his head knows is a dumb idea but he can't seem to stop himself. He chooses a back entrance so he can avoid having to endure any contact with Buchanans or anyone else he doesn't want to deal with right now...basically almost everyone in Llanview.
Viki had called him a few minutes earlier on his cell phone and told him which room he could find Tea in. Viki could tell from the traffic noises that he was in his car but Todd pretended that the sounds were coming from his television. Viki knew he was lying even as he insisted that he wasn't coming to the country club and wasn't interested in working things out with Tea.
As Todd skulks unnoticed through the back corridors of the country club toward Tea's location he continues to insist to himself that he's not going to be the one who makes all the effort. If Tea wants to beg him for another chance he might be willing to listen but that's it.
When Viki returned to the lounge she left the door slightly ajar. Todd uses this to his advantage as he positions himself out of sight just outside the door and eavesdrops on his ex-wife and sister.
chapter 84:
[Standing outside the door to the lounge that Tea and Viki are in, Todd can clearly hear Tea crying. His heart squeezes tightly knowing that Tea's hurting. He thought that she would get over him. It's been several weeks, why isn't she over him yet? Maybe she's not crying about him. Maybe she's crying about something else. She does cry about everything. Viki had said early that Tea was drunk, maybe she cries when she's drunk just like she cries when she's happy. Tea would be weird like that.
Todd can hear Viki speaking softly and moves a little closer to the door to hear better. He wants to know if Viki has revealed any information to Tea that she shouldn't, especially her ridiculous assertions that he's had a broken heart since Tea left him. He's tried to remind Viki numerous times in the last few weeks that he doesn't have a heart to break but he knows that she never believed him. He doesn't want her filling Tea's head with all that garbage about him having a big heart but being too afraid to reveal it.
Inside the lounge...]
Viki (handing Tea more tissues): Everything will be better very soon, you'll see.
Tea (still crying): No...no...it won't...it can't be.
Viki: And why is that?
Tea: He won't let it.
Viki: He will if he knows what's good for him.
[Tea cries even harder knowing that Todd fights anything that's good for him, except his relationship with Starr.]
Viki: What can I do to help you?
Tea: Make him love me.
Viki: Well...
[Viki stops speaking, feeling it's not her place to reveal Todd's feelings...or what she suspects are Todd's feelings since he won't actually admit them to her and she suspects he wouldn't admit them to Tea either which is probably part of what's caused this latest rift between Todd and Tea.]
Tea (trying to stop herself from crying): It's okay. I know that's impossible. It's an impossible dream. I've had a lot of those in my life. A couple of them actually came true...sort of.
Viki: Which dreams are those?
Tea: When I was a little girl I wanted to be rich. We didn't have much. What we especially lacked was love. That's not really true. I think that we did love each other but it just wasn't always easy to tell. My father wasn't comfortable showing affection. I think that maybe his working so hard was his way of showing it, you know? And, my brothers could be very sweet at times when they weren't teasing me but they were gone a lot, especially my older brothers, so I didn't see them that much. And, my mother...
[It suddenly becomes very quiet, except for the sound of Tea sniffling. Todd moves even closer and hesitantly peaks through the slight door opening. He can't see Tea's face because Viki is blocking his view. Knowing that Tea can't see him either, he continues to stand there, peaking into the room.]
Viki: What about your mother? She must have loved you immensely.
Tea: I don't know.
Viki: I'm certain she did.
Tea: She left. You know, I never thought that anything would ever be able to hurt as much as that but this does. I had so much trust in her. When she walked away that trust got shattered so intensely that I thought...no, I knew...that I would never trust anyone like that again. No one would ever have the chance to hurt me that deeply again...I wouldn't let them. It was easy, really. Most people never wanted to get that close to me anyway.
Viki: What about Todd?
[Todd is momentarily angry that Viki brought his name up but he's even more curious to hear what Tea's response will be.]
chapter 85:
Tea: Todd...
[Tea starts crying heavily again. Viki leans toward her to comfort her and Todd quickly jumps out of sight so Tea won't see him.]
Tea: Todd...
[Tea chokes slightly from all the emotions and starts coughing but continues to try to speak. Todd just wishes that Viki would do something to stop Tea from hurting so much.]
Tea: Todd...Todd...he...he...he...
Viki: It's okay. You don't have to talk about this if you you'd rather not. Rest now. Things will seem better very soon.
[Todd knows that Viki is expecting him to come storming in with his heart waving in front of him like a white flag ready to surrender and give Tea everything that she wants from him. He stays outside the room.]
Tea (trying desperately to compose herself): Todd did make me rich. He did give me that. He filled that fantasy. He gave me two million dollars for being his wife.
[Todd almost bursts into the room upon hearing Tea lie. He gave her five million dollars. What the hell is she talking about? The deal was five million dollars. One million when she agreed to marry him, one million when they got married, two million when...oh, wait a minute...no...no...no...he gave her the money...he must have. If he didn't than she must have gotten the money from the accountant...right?]
Tea: It was supposed to be five million, did you know that? But he got me cheap for only two million. Isn't that pathetic? I marry the guy for money and when he forgets to pay me more than half the money in our deal I don't remind him. I'm not a very good gold digger, I guess. Of course, it doesn't matter in this town. People still look at me that way. All this time later and they still look at me that way. Like, I'm just some tramp who's in it for money. Even when I worked in the District Attorney's office people still looked at me that way. Every time I come to this stupid country club there are people here to remind me who I am...how I got my membership.
Viki: The people who know you certainly don't think that way about you.
Tea: No, even some of them do, sometimes. It's okay. It's true. Todd bought me.
Viki: If he owed you money why didn't you remind him?
Tea: How could I? I was supposed to get a couple million when he got custody of Starr but I was in the hospital at the time and I just assumed that with everything going on he probably forgot. What was I supposed to do? Tell him that I was developing these feelings for him, that I wanted to be a real family with him and Starr, but then add that by the way he owed me a two million dollar installment on our stupid pretend marriage contract? How could I do that? The last million was supposed to be on our first wedding anniversary and by then everything was a mess. We were still married but it wasn't a happy anniversary. None of our anniversaries have been happy and I've spent every one of them alone.
Viki: You wanted something more than money from him, didn't you?
Tea: What I really wanted was for him to... You know what, it doesn't matter. He didn't then and he doesn't now.
Viki: You don't know that.
Tea: I know. I painfully know.
[Tea sniffs a few times, trying not to allow herself to start crying again.]
Tea: The two million was enough for me to learn what I needed to learn.
Viki: What did you learn?
Tea: That I didn't want to be rich. Don't get me wrong, having money can be useful and it's easier being rich than being poor but what I learned was that being rich wasn't what I thought it was. It was just a silly fantasy of a little girl. You know, kids sometimes see things in a mixed up way. There was so much sadness in the apartment I grew up in that I thought if I lived high up in the building instead of in the basement and if there were lots of windows instead of none at all then there would be happiness. All of those rich people that I would see everyday in that building always seemed so much happier. They smiled more, laughed more. I put it together that they lived higher up, had windows and a lot more money than we did so that's why they were happy and we weren't. Todd showed me that there can be sadness on the top floor, that money doesn't fill the emptiness, it doesn't erase the pain. I knew that already by that time. I did. I just...I guess that little girl inside of me hoped that just maybe the money he was offering me would finally make everything feel better.
Viki: And you learned that money doesn't eliminate loneliness or sadness.
Tea: Todd was lonely. I knew that right away. I saw his pain, the parts that he let me see or the parts that he just couldn't hide well enough from someone living with him every day.
Viki: And you wanted to lessen his pain, didn't you?
Tea: I tried, I really did, but I couldn't. There were moments that I thought maybe I was helping him, just a little, but now I don't think I helped him at all.
chapter 86:
[Standing outside the door, Todd is waiting for Viki to tell Tea that she's wrong about not helping him with his pain...she's wrong to think that he doesn't care about her...she's wrong about a lot of things. Todd desperately wants Viki to tell Tea all of the things that he knows he should tell her himself but usually finds impossible to find the words for when he's with Tea.]
Viki: I think that you did help him, Tea.
Tea: No.
Viki: I think you helped him in immeasurable ways. Ways that even Todd himself can't see...especially Todd, I suppose. He doesn't see the good in himself so, of course, he couldn't see what you saw in him. He doesn't understand why I care about him. He doesn't even understand why Starr adores him so much. He thinks that it's simply because she's young and naive and someday when she's older that love will stop.
Tea: That would never happen.
Viki: I know that and you know that but Todd can't grasp that concept. His life was so devoid of love and so filled with pain for so long and starting at such a young age that he finds it easy to believe anything negative about himself and almost impossible to believe anything positive. He doesn't see what you and I see which is precisely why we must continue to show him, continue to prove him wrong when he thinks that no one loves him for who he is.
Tea: I can't.
Viki: This latest incident with Todd, did it change how you feel about him?
Tea: No, but it showed me how he feels about me. He doesn't love me, Viki. He doesn't and he never did. I was fooling myself. I was seeing what I wanted to see. I fell in love with him and I wanted him to return that love so badly that I convinced myself that he had feelings for me too. He didn't. I understand that now. I can see that now. (starting to cry again) I don't blame him. I really don't. No one ever loves me. It was foolish of me to think that Todd would be different. I thought that maybe he would see something different from what everyone else sees but he didn't. I'm not going to do it anymore. I won't keep pushing him, hoping that if he just looks a little deeper he'll see something worth loving. I won't put either of us through that anymore. He just doesn't love me.
Viki: Tea...
Tea: It's okay. I understand. I wish it were different but it will never be. I have to face that. He just can't love me. I used to wonder what was wrong with me. I used to wonder why no one could love me. I don't wonder anymore. It's just something inside me. I'm just not worth it. I understand that.
[Viki tries to comfort Tea but she rolls over facing away from Viki. Todd physically feels all of the pain that Tea is in and it's too much for him, he starts to leave. Viki hears noise behind her and quickly turns around and sees movement outside the door but can't see who the person is.]
chapter 87:
[Viki knows that she saw someone outside the door. She desperately hopes that it's Todd.]
Viki (lying to Tea): I'm out of tissues. I'll go and find some more for you. I'll just be a minute.
[Tea stays turned away from Viki and continues crying. Viki quickly rushes out of the lounge and doesn't initially see anyone. She looks toward the dining room and finds an empty corridor. As she turns in the other direction she notices a person in dark clothing turn the corner and move out of sight. In her heart she knows it's her brother. She knows that he heard her conversation with Tea. She knows that he's hurting just like Tea is and that he's retreating from that pain, as he has done in the past.
Viki jogs down to the end of the corridor and turns in the direction that she saw Todd go a few seconds earlier.
Viki: Todd?
[Todd doesn't stop. He moves faster, forcing Viki to follow him through the maze of doors and hallways at the back of the club until she finally sees him preparing to escape through a final door that leads outside.
As Todd reaches the door to his freedom, he quickly pushes it open but doesn't step outside. Something makes him stop. He can hear Viki breathing heavily behind him and knows that she'll catch up to him if he doesn't keep moving. He stands still.]
Viki (trying to catch her breath): Thank you for stopping. I guess I need to start running on the treadmill again.
[Viki takes a minute to start breathing regularly again as she tries to read Todd's current state of mind.]
Viki (deciding to just jump right in): Tea's waiting for you.
Todd (after a long pause): That would be a mistake.
Viki: Would it? Maybe running away would be the mistake.
Todd: I wasn't running away.
Viki: Well, I had to run to keep up with you.
Todd: Maybe I don't want to be with Tea.
Viki: Maybe you don't. Tea certainly doesn't expect you to want that. You heard us, didn't you? You heard what we were talking about?
Todd: I'm not in the mood for a lecture. Just let me go.
Viki: I'm not stopping you from leaving. You stopped all on your own. Why do you think that is?
Todd: It's cold outside.
Viki: Then go into that room with Tea where it's warm.
Todd: I don't belong in there. She's better off without me.
Viki: Were you paying attention while you were eavesdropping? Did you hear what she was saying?
Todd: They were just words.
Viki: Words that she meant. She didn't know you were there. She had no reason to lie.
Todd: Maybe she was just pretending.
Viki: Why would she do that? What purpose could she have?
[Viki tries to make eye contact with Todd but he refuses.]
Viki: Todd, you're both hurting. You don't have to. You saw her pain in there, didn't you? You felt it? That's real and you could do something about it.
Todd: Yeah, make it a lot worse.
Viki: Or you could lessen it. She doesn't believe that you love her. If you tell her that you do love her you could make her more happy than she's ever been. Do you understand that?
Todd: I don't understand anything except that I can't go in there. She doesn't deserve me.
Viki: Does she deserve that pain?
Todd: She'll get over me and then she'll be happy.
[Viki physically grabs Todd and turns him toward her and forces him to make eye contact with her.]
Viki: Todd, that woman in there is in emotional agony right now because she is in love with a man that she is convinced has never felt any love for her. Her greatest wish is for you...you, Todd Manning, to love her and show her love. That's what she wants and what she needs and that is something that you can give her. You can do that, Todd. Gather up your courage, go in there and make it clear to her that she has your heart because you already have her heart.
Todd: I'll just mess everything up. Tea knows that...she knows better than anyone. I've always messed up and I always will.
Viki: Well, maybe Tea could help you if you let her. First, you have to go in there and tell her how you feel.
Todd: I can't.
[Viki knows that she won't be able to convince Todd so she gives up.]
Viki: I'll go back and take care of Tea. She shouldn't be alone. I'll make certain that she makes it through tonight okay.
Todd (looking in her eyes with sadness and complete sincerity): Thank you.
Viki: I won't be doing it for you. I'll be doing for Tea because she doesn't deserve to go through so much pain. She loves you, Todd. I believe that you love her. You may think that by pushing away love you will somehow be able to protect your heart but I think you'll find that your choice right now will have the opposite effect.
Todd: I don't give a damn about my heart. My heart isn't worth protecting but Tea's is.
Viki: Right now I can't help but wonder whose heart you're really trying to protect.
[Viki turns and walks away.]
chapter 88:
[Viki returns to the lounge Tea is in and sits down in the same chair she was in earlier. She feels completely exhausted from spending so much time this evening trying to help Todd and Tea work out their relationship. She wishes that she could offer Tea some hope, to keep her from giving up on Todd, but she now feels certain that there is no hope for Todd and Tea's relationship. She knows that her brother does love Tea but she is certain that he has decided not to follow his heart. She doesn't want to raise Tea's hopes anymore for something that will never happen but she hates to think of the love that Tea feels for Todd being wasted since she knows that Todd truly needs it, if only he could accept it.]
Tea (calmer now): Viki?
Viki: Yes?
Tea (rolling over to face her): Would it be okay if I asked you a personal question?
Viki: Yes, of course.
Tea: You've been in love, right?
Viki: Yes, I have.
Tea: And, you've been in love and had that love returned?
Viki (smiling): Yes. I've been very lucky, I suppose. I have loved and I have felt loved.
Tea: What does it feel like?
Viki: What do you mean?
Tea: When someone loves you...really loves you, what does that feel like?
[Viki knows that Tea is serious. She can see the pain in Tea's eyes and knows that Tea doesn't feel that she's ever been truly loved.]
Viki (stroking Tea's cheek comfortingly): It's a wonderful feeling. You'll know that feeling yourself...someday...when it's the right time...when you're ready.
Tea: I was ready with Todd.
Viki: I'm certain you were. Don't worry, it will happen. You just have to keep your heart open to it and don't be afraid.
Tea: Do you think that Todd knows that I love him? Do you think that he could feel it? I know that he doesn't think that he's worth love but he is. I tried to show him. I tried so hard.
Viki: I know that you did.
Tea: Do you think he knows?
Viki: I think he does. Deep in his heart, I think your love got through. Perhaps he just wasn't ready for it.
Tea: Do you think he'll let someone else into his life that way again someday? I know he probably would fight it when the next person tried too but I hope it happens and that he lets someone in.
Viki: Do you?
Tea: I wanted it to be me but if it can't be then I want him to find it with someone else. I hate to think of him being alone. I hope he finds love. He couldn't with me but maybe with someone else, someone he could trust, someone he could open his heart to.
[Viki watches tears filling Tea's eyes again. It takes her a moment to realize that Tea is staring at something behind her. Viki turns and is shocked to find Todd standing in the room, his eyes locked onto Tea's eyes.]
chapter 89:
[For a long silent moment Todd and Tea stare at each other. Tears fall down Tea's face as she gazes into the beautiful eyes of the man she loves. His eyes are full of intense emotion that Tea, in the state she's in, is inexplicably unable to discern correctly. She mistakenly believes the overwhelming love in his eyes is nothing but pity for her drunken and heartbroken state.
Viki looks between Todd and Tea wondering when one of them will finally speak. She realizes that perhaps it is her presence that is causing the current lack of communication.]
Viki: Well, I don't think I'm needed here anymore. I'll leave the two of you alone. I'll be in the dining room if either of you should need anything.
[Recognizing that her exit won't be acknowledged by Todd or Tea, who still haven't broken eye contact yet, Viki turns to leave.]
Viki (quietly to Todd as she moves toward the door): I'm very proud of you.
Todd (breaking eye contact with Tea to look at Viki): Go away.
Viki: You've come this far, Todd, don't shoot yourself in the foot now.
[Viki leaves. When Todd turns his gaze back to Tea she's looking away from him. He stands there for several moments uncertain how to proceed. He knows that he has to say something to Tea but he dreads having to say the words that he knows she needs to hear.
Before Todd can gather the words and begin to speak Tea starts to talk.]
Tea: You didn't have to come.
Todd: Huh?
[Tea looks at Todd briefly but quickly looks away.]
Tea: Viki called you, right? (not giving him a chance to respond) You didn't have to come. I'm...I...it's...uh...it's just been a bad night for me, that's all. I never should have bothered Viki and wasted her evening. She never should have called you. I don't need you here. I can take care of myself.
[Todd notices that Viki left the door open when she left. Wanting privacy for what he's about to say to Tea he moves toward the door to close it. Tea mistakenly believes he's leaving.]
Tea: Wait!
[Todd closes the door and looks at Tea, their eyes meeting for a moment before Tea looks away again.]
Tea: Before you go I should tell you something.
Todd: Maybe you shouldn't talk right now, Tea.
Tea: I need to. I want you to know something.
Todd: What's that?
Tea: I think you should find someone else.
Todd: Why would I want to do that?
Tea: So you can be happy.
Todd: Finding someone else wouldn't do that.
Tea: It would if you let it. I want you to be happy with someone else, Todd.
Todd: Tea, if you would just shut up for a minute then I...
Tea (interrupting him): I won't shut up, this is important. You may not think that you deserve to feel love but you're wrong.
Todd: Look, Tea...
Tea (interrupting): No, Todd, just listen to me. I know it didn't work out with us but it could with someone else.
Todd: Tea...
Tea: Stop interrupting me.
Todd: Me?
Tea: Will you just let me say this?
Todd: Tea...
Tea: Just a few minutes of your time is all I'm asking for and then you can leave and I'll never bother you again, I promise.
Todd: Well, if you promise...
[While Tea talks, Todd moves the chair Viki had been sitting in to the other side of the room so it won't be in the way anymore.]
Tea: I know you think that love is a waste of your precious time, that it just leads to pain and ultimately loneliness and, well, right now I'm close to agreeing with you on that but you can't allow the past to stop you from having a future. You have a heart, Todd. Don't even try to tell me that you don't because I've seen it...with Starr. You have so much love inside you that you have enough for Starr and for someone else, maybe even a few more children someday.
Todd: A few, huh?
Tea: You're a wonderful father.
Todd: It's good that you think that because, uh, Tea...
Tea (interrupting): Todd, let me finish.
[Todd kneels down next to the sofa Tea is lying on.]
Todd: Tea, I really think you should shut up right now.
Tea: Not until I say this.
Todd: Well, then hurry up.
chapter 90:
[The intensity of Todd's gaze and his close proximity to her makes Tea uncomfortable but she quickly shakes it off and continues talking.]
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Are you almost done yet?
Tea: Todd, just give me a chance.
Todd: I have, Tea.
[Tea stares at Todd's eyes. Her thoughts completely disappear as she feels herself getting lost in his eyes.]
Todd (moments later): Tea?
Tea: Yeah?
Todd: Are you done?
Tea: With what?
Todd: Great. Now I get to talk, right? Tea...
Tea: Wait, Todd.
Todd: Come on, Tea.
Tea: Just let me say it. You have to find someone else.
Todd: I don't want anyone else.
Tea: I know you think you don't want love but I think deep inside you really do. You have to find someone who loves you...someone you can love.
Todd: And then what?
Tea: And then you have to let it happen.
Todd: What?
Tea: It...everything...love.
Todd: You think that's easy?
Tea: No.
[Tea reaches her hand out and places it gently on Todd's cheek. She's surprised when he doesn't pull away from her touch.]
Tea: Todd, when you find this person to be with you have to make sure it's someone who can see how special you are. You need someone who can show you.
Todd: Can you see it?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Show me.
Tea: Huh?
[Todd brings his face closer to Tea's. As Todd's lips make contact with her mouth, Tea is in shock. She knew that Todd felt sorry for her when he first walked in but she wasn't expecting a pity kiss.]
Tea (pulling away from the kiss): Todd...
Todd: Tea, you really need to learn when to shut up.
[Todd places his hand behind Tea's head and brings his lips into contact with her mouth again. Tea wants to end the kiss, to ask him why he's kissing her at all right now, but she can't stop it as her lips respond to his lips, her tongue responding to his tongue.
Several minutes pass as they continue to kiss, completely oblivious to anything else. No fears, no doubts, no words are allowed to interrupt them as their undeniable physical attraction takes over.
Todd knows that Tea will still want words from him but for now he's just glad he could get her to stop talking for a minute.
When Todd finally pulls away from their kissing, Tea stares at him for a moment in shock.]
Tea: What the hell was that?
Todd: Tea, how drunk are you?
Tea: I'm not drunk.
[Todd smiles knowingly at her.]
Tea: Okay, I'm drunk but I still want to know what you think you're doing.
Todd (leaning forward again): This is what I think I'm doing.
[Todd allows his lips to lightly brush against Tea's lips but doesn't kiss her this time. He's curious to see what she'll do, if she'll push for more kissing on her own.
Tea watches Todd's face hovering in front of hers. She waits for the feeling of his kiss. She wants him to kiss her...she needs him to kiss her.]
Tea: Todd?
Todd: Yes?
Tea: Well?
Todd: What?
Tea: Nothing, I guess.
Todd: Okay.
[Several seconds later, Tea can't take the close proximity to Todd's lips anymore and moves her head toward his until their lips are firmly connected again. They both kiss passionately...desperately.
Again it's Todd who has to end the kiss because Tea can't stop...doesn't want to stop.]
Tea: Todd, what does this mean?
Todd: Does it have to mean something?
Tea: For me, yes. For you... What does it mean?
Todd: For me it means this.
[Todd leans toward her again but this time Tea resists and puts her hand on his shoulder to signal him to keep a distance.]
Tea: Todd, I need to know what it means.
Todd: It means what you think it means.
Tea: What do I think it means?
Todd: Don't you know?
Tea: No. I don't trust my own thoughts on this. My instincts have been so wrong in the past. Just tell me what it means.
Todd: Are you going to be able to shut up long enough for me to talk this time?
Tea: When have I ever stopped you from talking? I have always been the one trying to get you to open up and discuss your feelings. You're the one who never wanted to talk. You're the one who would...
[Todd stops Tea from continuing to talk by kissing her again.]
to be continued...
