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| ANOTHER JOURNEY BY TIMA |
CHAPTERS 51 - 55 |
PREVIOUSLY...
Todd: Are you afraid that if we leave this bed I won't give you your surprise?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: I promise I will.
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chapter 51:
[Todd and Tea continue to lie intimately close to each other. Tea is getting frustrated by Todd's dragging out whatever it is that he plans to do.]
Tea: Just do it here and now, Todd. No more teasing.
Todd: I'm not teasing you. I've been wanting to do this, too.
Tea: You have?
Todd: You smell great. You feel great.
[Todd finally presses his lips to her skin and kisses her cheek.]
Todd: You taste great. Let's go into the other room so I can give you your surprise.
Tea (confused): Todd...
Todd: I promise, Tea, I think you'll like it. I know I will. I've been thinking about it...fantasizing about it.
Tea (surprised): You fantasize...about me?
Todd: Let's go into the other room. I want to feel what it's like with you.
Tea: Todd, tell me what it is. I need to know.
Todd: It's not...you know...that.
Tea: Sex?
Todd: Doing that right now wouldn't be a good idea.
Tea: It wouldn't?
Todd: Are you ready for that? Think about it, Tea. Really think about it. Are you ready for that?
Tea (after a moment's pause): No. Not because I don't want to. I do. You have no idea how much I want that right now.
Todd: I think I do.
[Tea is so close to getting lost in Todd's presence...in his voice, in his touch. She knows that they should wait to have sex until their relationship is stronger and they both are certain that they're ready for it but with Todd so close to her all logical thoughts disappear and her physical desire for him takes over.]
Todd: Let's go into the other room.
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Tea, we have a window of opportunity for doing this. If you keep talking and giving me time to talk myself out of it...
[Tea quickly sits up and gets out of bed.]
Tea: Well, come on. Hurry up!
[Todd smiles slightly as he gets out of bed and walks out of the room. Tea follows him.
Tea is surprised when Todd enters the kitchen area.]
Tea (frustrated and disappointed): This has been about us eating? All of that was just a game...a joke?
Todd: You don't find eating exciting...tantalizing?
Tea: I'm going back to bed.
[Tea turns and starts to leave, tears forming in her eyes.]
Todd: You don't want your surprise?
[Tea stops but continues facing away from Todd.]
Tea: Not if your idea of a surprise is that I get to sit and watch you eat with your mouth open.
Todd: I thought you enjoyed watching me eat. You stare at me enough when we eat together.
[Tea wipes at the unshed tears in her eyes before turning around and facing Todd again.]
Tea: What is this, Todd? You just wanted to play with my mind and emotions again? You wanted to get your kicks again before time runs out and you leave?
Todd: Yeah...
[Tea turns and walks toward the bedroom.]
Todd: ...I wanted to get my kicks with you. Don't you want to get yours with me?
[Tea storms back into the kitchen. Todd can tell from the look on her face that she is extremely angry at him.]
Tea: Do you want me to answer that seriously?
Todd: Go for it.
Tea: Why? So, you can get your thrills out of knowing how turned on you make me and how frustrating it is when you pull this garbage?
Todd: Hey, you're the one who's trying so hard to get out of what we were about to do. I'm the one who wants to sit on the couch and do stuff with you.
Tea: What stuff? Give me an actual answer. Grope me. Do something, do anything, that will let me know what you're actually thinking. Tell me how you feel. Show me. Give me something, Todd.
Todd: I won't grope you.
Tea: Well, why not?
Todd: Is that what you want? You want me to just grab at you, get my fill and then fall asleep? Is that what you expect from me? You want me to treat you like that?
Tea (trying to calm down): Groping me...touching me...wouldn't be a bad thing. If it's what I want and it would make me feel good then you wouldn't be taking advantage of me. It's okay for us to do things that would make both of us feel good.
Todd: That's what I was planning on doing but you went and started a fight.
Tea: I did not.
Todd: I sure as hell didn't start this. I just wanted to...
[Tea waits but Todd doesn't complete his sentence.]
Tea: What is it, Todd? If you don't want to touch me...
Todd: I never said I didn't want to touch you.
Tea: You said...
Todd: I said I wouldn't grope you. I won't. Not tonight.
Tea (smiling slightly): So, another night?
Todd: I don't want to grope you at all. I don't want to touch you like that.
Tea: What does that mean?
Todd: It means that I don't want to grope you.
Tea: Does that mean that you don't want to touch me?
Todd: It means I don't want to grope you. How many times do I have to say it?
Tea: As many times as it takes until we understand each other. What do you consider a grope?
Todd: Grabbing at someone.
Tea: Do you consider it a negative thing?
Todd: Yeah. Don't you?
Tea: No. Well, it depends. If a stranger groped me, I'd want to break his hands so he would never be able to do that again. If you were to touch me, though...
Todd: We're talking groping here, not touching.
Tea: Fine. If we were in the middle of a passionate moment and you reached out and grabbed my breasts, I'd be okay with that. As long as you're not trying to hurt or humiliate me, I'm okay with you touching me any way you want to, anytime you want to.
Todd: That's not true.
Tea: Yes, it is?
Todd: So, right now, in the middle of a fight, I could grab at you...at certain body parts...and you'd be okay with that?
Tea: Well, not during a fight.
Todd: See? I knew you were lying.
Tea: You know what I meant. If the moment is appropriate.
Todd: How am I supposed to know which moments are appropriate and which ones aren't?
Tea: If you're not sure, you could ask me.
Todd: So, is this an appropriate moment?
Tea: Does the thing you wanted us to do involve touching?
Todd: No...well, yes...sort of.
Tea: Just tell me what it is.
Todd: It would involve touching but not with our hands.
Tea: What were you planning on touching me with? Your foot?
Todd: No...my tongue.
chapter 52:
[Tea stands in front of Todd in complete shock. She can't believe that Todd Manning just told her that he wants to touch her with his tongue.]
Todd: You're surprised, right?
Tea: Uh, yeah, definitely.
Todd: Good. I promised you surprises. I didn't want to disappoint you.
Tea: I'm...not...disappointed.
Todd: So, do you want to go and sit on the couch and get on with this?
Tea: We're doing it on the couch?
Todd: Yeah.
Tea: Then why did you come in here?
Todd: I wanted to get some water. We might need it.
Tea: Why didn't you say that before, instead of letting me misunderstand and get upset?
Todd: I didn't let you misunderstand. You went ahead and jumped into that all on your own.
[Todd opens the small refrigerator and takes out a chilled bottle of water.]
Tea: Todd?
Todd: What?
Tea: What exactly will you be touching with your tongue?
Todd: You'll see.
Tea: Can't you just tell me?
Todd: I'm supposed to surprise you.
Tea: You already have. Just tell me.
Todd: I'd rather show you. Unless you don't want me to do this. I swear I did brush my teeth, though. So, everything should be okay, unless you hate the taste of toothpaste.
Tea: So, I'll be tasting it? That means...
Todd (interrupting): Tea, just let me show you, okay? That is what you want, isn't it?
Tea (looking intently at his eyes): Yes.
Todd (walking toward the sofa): Well, let's get to it. We can't stay up all night.
[Tea follows him into the living room. Todd gestures for her to sit down on the sofa. She does. Todd opens the bottle of water and takes a sip.]
Todd (offering the bottle to her): You need some?
Tea: Sure.
[Tea takes the bottle and takes a sip. She hands the bottle back to him. He takes another swig and swishes the liquid around in his mouth. He puts the cap back on the bottle and places it on the table in front of the sofa.
Todd stands for a moment looking down at Tea. She keeps her eyes down, not making eye contact with him. She thinks she understands what he intends to do...or at least she has an idea of what he has in mind. She finds herself feeling extremely nervous about this. She definitely wants it, though...whatever it will precisely turn out to be.
Tea has always been nervous when kissing Todd in the past. She's always been concerned about pushing too far...asking for too much. She doesn't want to push him away by becoming too aggressive but she knows how hard it is for her to hold back when they kiss, especially when he initiates the kiss. When it's just a peck on the lips it's easy to control herself but when she allows her passion, her lust for Todd, to become a part of it, it's too easy for it to go too far, too fast, for both of them.
Todd watches Tea. He can tell that she's nervous. He's nervous, too. They've never done this before. They've kissed, sure, but nothing like what he wants to do now. He wants it to be perfect for her, to be something that feels good...that feels great.]
Todd: Tea?
Tea (finally looking up at him): Yes?
Todd: I'll be right back.
[Todd leaves and quickly walks toward the main bedroom.]
Tea: Todd, if you don't want to do this...
[Todd returns with his lip balm in his hand.]
Todd: I want to do this. It was my idea, remember?
[Todd applies the balm to his lips. Tea watches, wishing she could touch his lips with her finger, with her lips, with her...
Tea's thoughts are interrupted as Todd extends his hand toward her, offering her the use of his lip balm.
Tea takes it without saying anything and applies some to her lips. Todd sits down next to her on the sofa.
This is finally it. No more delays. No more talking. At least, Todd hopes the talking is over.
Todd brings his hand up to her face and very slowly caresses the side of her face that earlier he wasn't able to touch because it was pressed into her pillow. His hand then goes to her chin and down her neck. As his hand moves to the back of her neck and up into her hair, he moves slightly closer to her on the couch.
Tea watches as his face moves nearer, her nervousness increasing.]
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Tea, if you don't want me to do this then tell me. If you do, though, shut up and let me do it.
Tea (tears beginning to shine in her eyes): Todd?
Todd: What?
Tea: Is this real?
Todd: Yeah, it's real. I'm really here. You're really here.
[Todd moves even closer toward her on the couch, so that they're bodies are touching. Tea jumps slightly at the extra contact.]
Todd: Do you want to wait?
Tea: I want it to be real.
[A small tear drops from one of her eyes. Todd uses his other hand to erase it from her face.]
Todd: This is very real, Tea. It feels real, doesn't it? Let me show you how real this really is.
[Todd brings his face closer and nuzzles her face for a moment, enjoying the way her skin feels against his, the way she smells, the slight shaking of her body that matches his own.
As Todd's lips come into contact with hers, they both stop breathing for a few seconds. As they press their lips together, Todd reaches his arm around her and pulls her closer to him.
When the kiss ends, they look at each other, their faces still close together. Todd's hand moves from her hair back to her cheek.]
Todd: Are you ready?
Tea: For what?
Todd: Your surprise.
Tea: That wasn't it?
Todd: I can do better than that.
Tea: That was pretty great, Todd.
Todd: Do you want to do more?
Tea: Yes.
[Todd brings his lips back to hers and kisses her lightly for a few seconds. As the kiss ends he doesn't remove his lips but instead opens them and extends his tongue. As his tongue touches her lips, he tastes the flavor of the lip balm she put on a few minutes earlier. He moves his tongue along her upper lip and then slowly slides it across her bottom lip.
He kisses her softly again before pulling slightly away and looking into her eyes.]
Todd: Do you know what your surprise is?
Tea: Tell me.
Todd: You haven't figured it out?
Tea: I think I know but I want you to tell me.
Todd: There is so much that I know about you but there's so much that I don't know. There are parts of you I never had a chance to memorize.
Tea: You want that chance now?
Todd: If you're okay with it.
Tea: You don't think we have very much time, do you? That's why your doing this now.
Todd: I'm doing it now because I want to do it now. It will fall apart because it will. Everything does. We both know that. This time I want more to remember, don't you?
Tea: Yes.
[Tea gently strokes his cheek with her fingertips.]
Tea: I wish it could last.
Todd: If we memorize it then it always will.
Tea: I mean, more than just this moment.
Todd: I don't want to think about anything but this moment right now. Do you want me to do this?
Tea: Yes.
chapter 53:
[Todd's lips again gently caress Tea's quivering lips. As he kisses her, he notices that she isn't kissing him back. He ends the kiss and pulls slightly away from her on the sofa.]
Todd: What's wrong?
Tea: Nothing.
Todd: We don't have to do this.
Tea: I want to.
Todd: No, you don't.
Tea: Of course I do. Why would you think that I don't want this?
Todd: You're not...
Tea: What?
Todd: Just now, you didn't do anything while I was...
Tea: Kissing. Use the word.
Todd: Well, why weren't you?
Tea: I thought you were going to do something else.
Todd: I was but not if you don't want me to.
Tea: Of course I want you to.
Todd: Then why are you so stiff and shaking so much. If I repulse you that much...
Tea: You don't repulse me at all. Well, there are moments while you're eating...
[Todd stands up and walks to the other side of the small living room area.]
Tea: Todd, I was kidding. You don't repulse me at all. Even your eating habits amuse me.
Todd: Great. I'm glad there are things you can laugh at me about.
Tea: I thought you liked it when I laughed. That's what you wrote in that love letter, remember?
Todd: What love letter? I've never written a love letter in my life.
Tea: Yes, you did...during our first marriage.
Todd: That was Sam. That was him not me. Maybe you should try sleeping with him. He's probably one of the guys you've been boinking behind my back, anyway.
Tea: I have never had sex with Sam and I have no desire to ever have sex with him. This isn't about him or anyone else. This is about our relationship so don't try to start a fight by bringing other people into it.
Todd: You're the one who brought other people into our relationship.
Tea: Do you really want to fight right now? I thought you had something else that you wanted to do.
Todd: You're the one who blew it.
Tea: No, I'm not. I'm sitting here waiting for the surprise you've been promising me.
Todd: Why were you shaking?
Tea: Why were you?
Todd: Forget it. I knew this was a stupid idea. I never should have...
Tea: You never should have what? Married me? Come back for me? Kissed me? What? Do you regret all of it, Todd?
Todd: Do you?
Tea: No. There are moments...horrible moments...from our past together that if I could go back and change them, I would, but most of it I wouldn't change at all. I wouldn't give back those moments for anything.
Todd: What about this moment?
Tea: I was enjoying it.
Todd: Why were you shaking?
Tea: Because, I'm scared.
Todd: Of me, right? Just admit it.
Tea: I wasn't scared that you would physically hurt me. I am scared of getting hurt, though. A few minutes ago you told me that this will end. Don't you think that scares me? It terrifies me.
Todd: Why?
Tea: Because I...
Todd (quickly interrupting): Don't say it.
Tea: You just asked...
Todd: I don't care. Just don't say it.
Tea: Does it change anything if we don't say it? Will it hurt any less when it ends?
Todd: See? You think it will end, too.
Tea: Of course I do, because you do.
Todd: Don't be dumping all of this on me.
Tea: Fine. Even if you promised me forever I would still be convinced that you would leave me. Happiness has never existed for me...not for very long. Of course, you'll leave me. This has to end. I want it so much that it can't possibly last.
Todd: That's why you were shaking?
Tea: I was shaking because I was waiting to see what you would do. I was shaking because I was hoping that you would do something you've never done before and I was nervous about that. I was shaking because I was trying to hold myself back so I won't push you too far and scare you off completely. I was shaking because you excite me...because you turn me on. I was shaking because...
Todd (interrupting): Okay. Enough talk.
Tea: I want you to do what you had planned, Todd. I want to know what it feels like.
Todd: It's probably no big deal. You'll be disappointed.
Tea: Nothing that involves your tongue touching me could ever disappoint me.
Todd: You don't know that.
Tea: Bring your tongue back over here and prove me right.
[Todd continues to stand at a distance from Tea. He watches her closely. The glint in her eyes both excites and terrifies him.]
Tea: I could bring my tongue to you, if you prefer.
[Todd doesn't say anything as he walks back to the sofa and sits down.]
Todd: No more flirting.
Tea: Okay...for now.
Todd: What I want to do...
Tea: Yes?
Todd: Just let me.
Tea: Okay.
Todd: Don't interfere.
Tea: I have no intention of doing anything that will make it stop.
Todd: So, you'll shut up?
Tea: I will stop talking. Just give me something else to do with my mouth, Todd.
Todd: I thought you were going to stop flirting?
Tea: I wasn't flirting. I was simply stating a fact. If your mouth kept my mouth busy...
[Tea stops talking as Todd quickly leans into her and places his lips on hers again. Tea kisses him back. She tries to hold back but some of her lust for him clearly shows through to Todd in her kiss. He feels her passion which escalates his own passion. They continue kissing for several minutes, each holding onto the other physically, desperate not to lose what they both know they have no chance of keeping.
When Todd pulls away, they both are breathing hard and trying desperately to talk their bodies down from the passionate heights their kissing was taking them to.
Todd quickly grabs the water bottle off the table in front of him and takes a generous drink from it. As he removes the bottle from his lips, Tea takes the bottle from his hand and places it to her own lips. Todd watches her. As she lowers the bottle from her mouth, Todd grabs it suddenly and tosses it across the room. His hand returns to her face and slides into her hair. He brings his face to hers for a second before pulling it away again.
Tea's hand touches his hand in her hair, wanting him to keep it there. Todd tries to calm himself down but as he looks at her, at the lust for him that he sees in her eyes, his desire increases instead of dissipating.
Tea knows that things could easily go too far in this moment. Despite the fact that her body definitely wants it to go further, she doesn't want to chance losing him this soon, not because of kissing.]
Tea: We can wait.
Todd: No. Right now. It has to be right now.
chapter 54:
[Tea moves forward and nuzzles Todd's face with her own. She wishes that she knew how to calm his fears, his internal demons, so she could ensure that they would have this moment together. They both need it. They both want it. They're both terrified of it. They both know that this is something new, that they are entering a new part of their relationship, a part that they never reached before despite the fact that they have already been legally married to each other twice.]
Todd (whispering): Close your eyes.
[Tea's eyes instantly close. The trust that she is showing him with such a simple gesture, amazes him. Todd pulls his head back so that he can see her face better but places his hands on either side of her face so she'll know that he isn't pulling away from her.
For several minutes, he looks at her face, occasionally moving one of his hands to gently stroke various parts of her face. His touch is gentle...his admiration overwhelming.]
Todd (whispering as his face nuzzles hers again): You're beautiful.
[Tea's emotions heighten.]
Todd (still whispering): I missed you.
[Tea loses control of her emotions as the tears start to flow. She can't believe that this could possibly be real. Todd can't really be sitting next to her, touching her face, telling her that he missed her. She must be dreaming. Or, more likely, this is a nightmare disguised as a blissful dream. The nightmare part will come when she awakens and finds Todd gone.
Todd can sense that if he doesn't do something immediately, he will soon be dealing with a blubbering Tea.
Todd gently touches his lips to hers. Before she has a chance to respond, his lips part. She waits, anticipating the next sensation. He doesn't disappoint her as his tongue touches her lips again. He slowly caresses her lips with his tongue for a moment, enjoying the contact.
As Todd moves his tongue beyond her lips, Tea moans slightly. His tongue enters her mouth slowly, yet deliberately. He pulls her body closer to him as his lips press more firmly against her and his tongue enters her mouth more fully.
Tea can't control the whimper that escapes from her core. It isn't lust that passes between them...it's love. They both feel it. They both feel the warmth spreading through them as Todd slowly, and lovingly, caresses the interior of Tea's mouth with his tongue.
Tea's body is pressed against the back of the sofa as Todd continues to press against her. One of her hands is placed firmly against the back of his head, holding him to her, letting him know that she wants to be connected to him.
His slow exploration of her mouth is the most sensual sensation Tea has ever experienced in her life. She moans again without realizing it, without caring. All she knows is that he can't stop. He absolutely is not allowed to stop.
Todd tries to keep his focus on what he's currently doing rather than on what his body wants to do next. He wants to remember, to memorize, every part of Tea. He wants to explore her.
He knows that he is allowing her too much information, that she will now know how much he adores her...needs her...wants her. He doesn't care. He has to know what it's like to share this kind of physical intimacy with her.
For several minutes nothing exists to either of them except his tongue in her mouth. Soon, though, the sound of Tea's increasing moans begins to enter Todd's consciousness. The sound worries him and causes him to pull his mouth off of hers, concerned that maybe she needs more air.
As his face begins to pull back from hers, he feels the pressure of Tea's hand on the back of his head. She wants his mouth on hers again, the loss is too much for her.
Todd carefully studies her face. Her eyes are open and looking directly at his with a pleading look. She continues to emit occasional moans. He realizes that her current moans are different...more desperate.
He studies her eyes carefully, trying to read her thoughts...her feelings. His fingertips gently touch her face near her eyes and slowly move down toward her mouth. As his fingers lightly touch her lips, she finally speaks to him.]
Tea (in a pleading whisper): Please...
[She barely speaks her plea before Todd's mouth in on hers again. This time when his tongue enters her mouth it isn't in a languid manner. Instead of a leisurely exploration, this time his tongue focuses solely on her tongue.
Initially, she tries to keep her tongue still, not wanting to make him uncomfortable or scare him away by being anything but a passive recipient. As his tongue becomes more insistent, though, she takes a chance and responds with her own tongue.
A moment later, Todd pulls his face slightly away from hers, disappointing her.]
Todd: Tea...
Tea: We can stop.
Todd: Do you want to?
[Tea doesn't respond. She definitely doesn't want to stop but she also doesn't want to pressure him into continuing if he doesn't want to...if they've already gone too far for him.
Todd watches Tea's eyes for a response since she isn't verbalizing one.]
Todd (cautiously): Do you want to try it?
Tea (confused): What?
Todd: You know...
Tea: No, I don't.
Todd: You can if you want.
Tea: What?
Todd: Try it.
Tea: Try what?
Todd: That.
Tea: What?
Todd: Do I have to show you?
Tea (smiling): Would that involve the use of your tongue again? Because, I've really enjoyed the way you've used it so far tonight.
Todd: Have you?
[Tea notices a slight smile on Todd's face. She brings her hand to his face and traces his lips with her fingertips.]
Tea: Do that again, Todd. Do it slow. I like the way it feels.
Todd: Do you?
Tea: Very much.
Todd: Do you want to try it?
Tea: Is that what you were referring to?
Todd: Do you want to?
Tea: Would you let me?
Todd: I could try.
Tea: We could wait.
Todd: If you don't want to...
Tea (quickly interrupting him): I want to. I just don't want to go too far.
Todd: If you're afraid you won't be able to handle it...
Tea: Will you?
Todd: I offered.
Tea: That doesn't mean...
Todd: Do it or don't, Tea. Make up your mind.
[Tea doesn't move. She's too scared of making a mistake, of pushing too hard, of doing something that will cause him to leave.
Todd recognizes the concern in her eyes. He slowly brings his mouth to hers again and kisses her slowly, waiting until she responds before he slides his tongue back into the safety of her mouth. He enjoys the feeling for a moment before coaxing her tongue again, this time leading it toward his own mouth. Her tongue follows his, not wanting to lose contact.
As she tries to copy his earlier movements, she begins moaning again at the incredible sensation of slowly, and lovingly, exploring his mouth.]
chapter 55:
[Todd and Tea are unaware of how long they've been on the sofa together.
As they kiss, Todd's hand is on Tea's neck. He places the tips of his fingers under the collar of her T-shirt and caresses her bare shoulder. They both know that if they don't stop soon they may not stop at all.
They both choose to end the kiss at the same moment. They each look at the other person's eyes, trying to determine what the other person wants, if they'll be progressing further or stopping for the night.
Tea is the first to make a decision and speak.]
Tea: It must be getting pretty late.
Todd: Okay.
Tea: I really enjoyed this, Todd.
Todd: Yeah, sure, whatever.
[Tea brings her hand up to his cheek. He tries to pull away but she refuses to let him.]
Tea: I mean it. If we continue, though...
Todd: Yeah, you wouldn't want to do that.
Tea: Yes, I would. I do want that. You must know that.
Todd: I know you're putting an end to it. It's your fault, not mine.
Tea: There is no fault here. If you want to continue...fine, we'll continue.
Todd: Forget it. Obviously, you don't want to.
Tea: If we don't stop now, in a few minutes we'll be in that bedroom, in that bed, and it won't be because we want to sleep.
Todd: Right. We should have separate rooms.
Tea: What?
Todd: We have two bedrooms in this place. You take one. I'll take the other. That way we won't have to worry about not getting enough sleep.
Tea: So, will we be having separate beds from now on?
Todd: Sure, if that's what you want.
Tea: You don't care at all what I want.
[Tea stands up and walks toward the main bedroom. Todd follows her and watches her from the door as she gets back into bed. When Tea turns off the lamp by the bed, Todd uses a switch near the door and lights the room up again so he can continue to look at her.]
Todd: You're blaming me for this, right? We both know it's all your fault.
Tea: What is?
Todd: You're the one who stopped.
Tea: Do you want to make love to me tonight?
Todd (turning away from the door): See you in the morning.
Tea (raising her voice as he walks away): You can't hide forever, Todd.
Todd (returning to the doorway): Sure, I can.
Tea (sitting up and looking directly at him): I want to be with you tonight. We had to stop what we were doing. We both knew that. We could still sleep together, though. We could share this bed without anything else happening tonight.
Todd: You sure about that? You seemed to have some trouble controlling yourself in the other room.
Tea: So?
Todd: You're admitting it?
Tea: That you turn me on? Sure. Why not? I'm not trying to hide that fact from you. Why are you trying to hide it from me?
Todd: How can I hide your being turned on from you?
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Just back off this, Delgado.
Tea: Why? What's so horrible about letting me know that I appeal to you? I won't expect anything different from you.
Todd (not believing her): Sure.
Tea: I won't. Yes, I would like you to kiss me again. Of course I want you to use your tongue again like you did tonight. I want you to hold me. I would love to spend the night in your arms. I can wait for any part of that and for anything else that I want but that you're not ready to give me right now.
Todd: This isn't my fault.
Tea: Fine. It isn't your fault. Now come to bed.
Todd: That's probably not a good idea.
Tea: I promise I'll keep my hands, and all other body parts, to myself.
[Todd doesn't move. They both silently watch each other from across the room for several minutes.]
Tea (extreme emotion evident in her voice.): I don't want to sleep alone tonight, Todd.
[Todd slowly walks toward the bed.]
Todd: So, if it was any other guy in here with you tonight, you'd be saying the same thing, right?
Tea: If it was any other guy I'd probably be offering sex as an incentive.
[Todd lies down on top of the covers on his side of the bed.]
Todd: But since it's me...
Tea: Since it's you...
Todd (interrupting): We should just skip the chat.
Tea: What about the light, Todd?
Todd: What about it?
Tea: You left it on.
Todd: So? You used to fall asleep with your light on all the time when we were married. Now, suddenly you need it dark to sleep?
Tea: No. I thought maybe you did.
Todd: It doesn't matter to me. I don't sleep, anyway.
[Todd rolls over onto his side, facing away from Tea.
Several minutes pass silently.]
Tea: Todd?
[After a brief pause, Tea accepts that Todd won't be responding to her and continues talking.]
Tea: The reason I could be with someone else right now is because I wouldn't feel anything for him. It wouldn't matter to me. It would just be something to fill the loneliness...to fill that void, you know? With you it would be different...not for the reasons that you're probably imagining in your mind...it would be different because it wouldn't be meaningless. It would matter...too much, maybe...probably. If we ever are together like that, I don't want it to be because we're lonely or scared. I want it to be...
Todd (desperately needing to interrupt): I'm trying to sleep here. Can't you at least give me a little quiet. You're going to be yacking in your sleep in a few minutes, as it is.
Tea: We should talk about this.
Todd: No, we shouldn't.
Tea: It's important.
Todd: Exactly! All important subjects should be ignored. Haven't you figured that out yet? We can talk about stupid and boring stuff that doesn't matter to either of us but this other stuff just leads to trouble.
Tea: It doesn't have to be that way.
Todd: Yes, it does. You have a choice, Tea. Either we talk about all the stuff you want to talk about and we sleep in separate rooms or you shut up and we share this bed for the rest of the night. Which is it?
Tea: We do need to talk about all of the subjects that we've been putting off. We can continue putting them off for the night, though, I suppose. I do want to share this bed with you. I do want to wake up next to you. I do want to...
Todd (interrupting): If I let you touch me, will you shut up?
Tea: That depends...what part of you do I get to touch?
[Todd rolls onto his back and turns his head toward her. He lifts his hand and places it on top of her hand, squeezing slightly.]
Todd: If you say one more word, our deal is off. I mean it, Tea.
[Tea smiles at him, wanting to speak but forcing herself not to since having his hand surrounding hers is more important to her in this moment than anything she wants to say.
After staring intently at each other for a few more minutes, Tea moves a little closer to Todd on the bed and gets comfortable. She closes her eyes and eventually falls asleep.
Todd watches her for more than an hour. There's so much he wants to say to her, so much he still wants to do with her. He knows their time is limited. He dreads it but he knows at some point soon they'll have to have some of the discussions they've been delaying.
Eventually, Todd starts to feel himself getting tired. He turns onto his side, facing Tea, and moves his face closer to hers. He adds his other hand to the one already holding her hand...he doesn't want to chance loosing her while he sleeps. He closes his eyes and finally allows himself to fall asleep as he listens to the comforting sounds of her sleeping next to him.]
to be continued...
