There is also Professor Martin Schramm, who was the sponsor of the Amateur Radio Society, mentor, and my dear brother. Once a week, I'd update him about happenings of the Society, and we basically chat. One day in my freshman year before I took my Psychology 101 test, I told him that I was nervous about the exam and even though I studied for it, I was hoping that the answers will stick to my head. I asked him: "Professor, before I split to take the test, may I request a blessing- a benediction- upon me?" He made the sign of the cross (if you seen a benediction at a Lutheran or an Episcopalian service, this is what I'm talking about) and said, "May God X be with you and may He place the answers into memory." Somehow, the thought of the blessing remained in my mind and the knowledge that God is with me had brought me peace. I got the test paper and when I sat down to take the exam, I knew that I will breeze through it, and I did. After Thanksgiving break, I got the results and it was an A. The action did not made it possible, but rather it was God who have helped me. When I got the result, I told Professor Schramm and we are happy about what God have done for me. To this day, the thought of the blessing still lingers as a sign of His faithfulness. He also prays for me in the subject of self-improvement. For four years, he watched over me and guided me through challenges. I owe Brother Schramm my gratitude. If you have such a friend and nothing else, consider yourself blessed!
Finally, there's Professor Dargatz (former professor of religion, now full-time pastor), who always greeted me and wonders how the Society was doing. I talked to him about thorny issues of Christianity, particularly about my religious background and its complications some time ago and he gave me a thorough, logical response. The "kewlest" things about him is that he digs Bork and he dressed up as Martin Luther for Halloween. (He dresses up for Reformation Day presentations at several schools.) These professors took the time to listen to a inquiring mind and I thank them.
I talked to Brother Dargatz about infant baptism and he explained it to me. He led me to resources to read and it was totally profound. I learned that babies can't talk or would forget their infancy, but they are full of sin. If the wages of sin is death, and babies often die, then babies are sinful by nature. Also, if Luther, Calvin, and Knox did not get themselves re-baptized (being former Catholics like I am), and they are considered to be among the most notable of Christians, then why should I deny my baptism (even though I will never go back to being Catholic and that I did not remember and I sure don't know what I'm doing and that my family treated it as some kind of ritual)? Am I in error? If I am, at least I err in the side of grace and not of sin. After all, St. Augustine said that it is not the lack of baptism that damns, it's the contempt of it. (By the way, if you are reading this page and you are not baptized but you identify yourself as Christian, please get baptized.) Lastly, the Apostle Paul was called by Jesus to serve Him and His Father. Before that, he was a Pharisee's Pharisee and a zealous persecutor of Christians. He did not call Jesus, Jesus called him.
Through the influence of these professors, the case for Lutheranism became very strong and it compelled me to join the Lutheran church, and I have been affirmed into the church on 26 April 1998. Interestingly, as I found out later, that was exactly 151 years since the Missouri Synod was founded.
During my stint at Irvine, most of my friends were in the pre-sem program. We would watch Monty Python, laugh at cheesy 80s movies, and have cook-outs (I was the queen of the grill and purveyor of fine red wine). We were there for each other and we learned from each other. Several of them are now at both seminaries in Fort Wayne and St. Louis. They encouraged me to go on for my Master's degree in Historical Theology and so, after graduating in 2001, I went to Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne.
I really enjoyed my studies there, despite the snow all around and lack of an In-N-Out Burger joint. The students and the professors treated me as their fellow peer, despite that I can not (and will not) study for the ministry. There was a sense of being down-to-earth: At lunch, profs ate with students. Most of these students had very good careers prior to entering Fort Wayne. Some were teachers and businessmen, and several of them left very lucrative positions for pastoring a church-- for the sake of the Gospel. The whole atmosphere was very good.
The biggest thing that happened to me there occurred during Symposia 2002. I was on my way to the Current Trends of Theology class when the Rev. Wayne Rutz was standing outside Wyneken Hall, near the Te Deum mosaic area. He opened the door for me and asked me if I was related to a fellow MA student, who happens to be also from California. It was a logical question to ask, since being Latina is not a common sight at the Seminary. I replied that she's not related, but I knew her from class and her husband is also studying at the Sem for his MDiv. After a few minutes, Wayne asked if I was with someone at the Sem. I responded in the negative and I asked him if he brought his wife to the lectures. He replied that he was widowed nine years ago. He then talked about how he served over 35 years in ministry. After introductions, we chatted for a while.
I looked at the time. "I have a class to attend. Today, it will be a shortened class as everybody wants to see Neuhaus speak. But wait here. The way Symposia is, not too many people would attend the class." I made a mad dash to the classroom and looked through the window. About 5 people in attendance. I was sure that Professor Muller would not mind me skipping class this one time. (Professor Muller: If you are reading this, my apologies. I had a very important appointment to keep.)
So, I went back to Pastor Rutz and hung out with him outside the doors. It turned out that Wayne was there to see Richard John Neuhaus speak. Richard was one of Wayne's classmates during his studies at Concordia Seminary-St Louis. After that, he crossed over to the LCA and then one day joined the Catholic Church and became Father Neuhaus. His First Things magazine is very popular with the liturgical/conservative set.
After talking, we went to the commons and hung out with some students there. We talked for a while until it was time for the lecture. Walking down towards Wambsganss gym, Wayne asked me if I am interested in having dinner. I said yes, thinking that it could mean he's taking me out to dinner, but considering my being at the Sem, the dinner was most likely a church potluck, complete with foam plates, mac and cheese, and punch served in those AAL-imprinted cups. We sat down together and listened to Fr Neuhaus attempt to explain why he became a Catholic. After that, we exchanged numbers and wished each other blessings.
The next evening, after the Symposia ended, Wayne called and asked me out for dinner Saturday night. I accepted and had an enjoyable time.
And so, we went out to more dinners and over time, we courted each other. As days go by, we began to use nicknames. I do not meant cringe-inducing stuff like "studmuffin" or "pookie." Good Lutheran Theologians would use German words to describe theological concepts. When we meant "Office of the Holy Ministry," we use "Predigtamt." A man who is a preacher is a Prediger. So, after some time, I called Wayne my "Prediger" and he calls me his "Silly Goose." (Not theological, but very nice.) And we became the best of friends, the Prediger and me.
Right from the start, we knew that we are different in age, Wayne being considerably older than me. But it did not prevented us from being great friends and in love. The reaction from the Sem was very positive when we announced our engagement.
I was at a retreat near Indianapolis not too long ago and several students asked me about my husband and the age gap. I said that there are many great advantages in an age-gap marriage, if both husband and wife are familiar with the ramifications. The older spouse tends to be more established, more stable emotionally than most men my age, especially if the husband is a widower. Since the both of us have similar career choices, Wayne is also my mentor who coaches me on how to interact with the congregation and with individuals. I get to chat with someone who really knew about the Church with her challenges and her purpose. Ultimately, the most important thing in a relationship is not how many days one has lived but how much one has loved. The Prediger loves me dearly and it shows.
One fine October weekend, my mom flew out from California to meet him and she thinks he's a capital fellow. Shortly after that, Wayne and I went to my Greek end-of-class party and introduced him to my classmates...and they like him very much. One of my classmates was a fieldworker at Wayne's church. After dinner, we went out for iced tea and he said that he would like to get married. We had thought about that for a time and I thought he was musing about that. The next day, after shopping, I called Wayne to see how he was doing and he said:
"Are you going to marry me or not?"
"Is this a proposal?"
"Yes, it is."
"Yes, I will marry you...but why over the phone?"
"If C.F.W. Walther proposed via letter, why can't I over the phone? Surprised you, didn't I?"
And so, over time, we prepared for the wedding and on 10 May 2003, we got married at his church. About two weeks later, I graduated from the Seminary. Now, I am planning for the future ahead, by studying for the Deaconess certification. And Wayne and I will be there for each other. God had blessed the both of us more than we expected or hoped for.
I will always confess that the God of Jacob is my God, Creator and my Commissioner; and He sent His Son Jesus (God, Lord and my Counselor) to die for fallen, sinful me and the world; and the Holy Spirit (God and Paraclete) is guiding my life. I will always embrace the Lutheran Confessions without reservation and will defend it faithfully. ONE GOD, THREE PERSONS, SOLI DEO GLORIA.
Coram Deo
At the top of the page, there is a Latin saying and this phrase means "before the face of God." In my years as a Christian, His face has shone upon me and it is a lovely countenance. My question to you is: Do you feel shame that you don't want anybody to look at you? Are you afraid that God is angry at you? Good reader, I have news to share with you. God has done something for you- He have sent His Son Jesus to die for you. He wants reconciliation. If you want that relationship, go to a good pastor (preferably a Confessional Lutheran one) and talk to him about knowing more about the faith. He'll know what to do (he better know- he could have been my classmate and he should know better than to sleep through Parish Education class) and guide you properly. I advise you to read the Bible and attend a Bible class taught by the pastor. The Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod is solid and if you click "Who We Are", at the bottom of the page, there is a church directory. Also, the Evangelical-Lutheran Liturgical Congregations directory is a great listing of solid, liturgical churches. That is about it for now, so I hope that you have God on your side.
