Chapter 9



"Thank God we're done!" Exclaimed Jayme as they finally finished recording her album, she had spent two weeks, 12 hours a day recording and was so relieved and excited to be over with it.

"Well, you worked hard Jayme, hope you have fun on your time off, those will come very few and far apart." Commented her producer, Johnny Andrews.

"I have been told countless times by many people to expect that. I'm scared but I love music so I'm taking a big chance, and I also hope I have fun during my time off." Jayme said giving a smile that she hoped would cover up the fact that she was a little scared about seeing everyone.

She had only talked to Jake once since the last time on the bus and again he blew her off, and again she heard the same familiar voice, only this time it was in the background talking to him. She hated that he was keeping something from her. But she wanted so badly to know that they were in love and happy that she tried convincing herself that he was planning a surprise for her, or that he was so heartbroken that she was gone and he was too worried of it showing when talking to her. But time and time again the same thing flashed through her thoughts, he had no idea when she would be home which leaves no time for a surprise and Jake would tell her if he missed her, and she knew him if he missed her that much he would wanna talk to her. Something was wrong, very wrong.

And then there was her best friend, Kayla, she had tried calling her and the response was the same, she blew her off saying she had tests to study for. And when Jayme called Kayla to simply ask if she had seen Jake around school and if he was acting different or weird, Kayla replied, "No, I don't see him very often." Jayme hinted the tint of nervousness if her voice, and the way she flustered.

And her parents were as usual worried sick about her, she had no idea why but she hated that, she just wanted to be left alone. In fact, when the gang would hang out at a club or in the lobby Jayme would come up with some excuse to stay in the room of whatever hotel they were in. She would request ahead of time that the windows be closed and the curtains hide any light in the room she would be staying in. She had stopped sharing a room with Lindsay and had even stopped spending so much time with the other dancers or the guys.

The only time she had done anything was when Howie would come visit her and make sure she was all right, he was sweet she decided. But she preferred to be alone as much as possible.

Jayme watched as her producer organized everything and her eyes teared up when she thought back on a few nights ago when she had cried herself to sleep after suddenly realizing the cold hard truth, fame was changing her life drastically and quickly, and she hated every damn minute of it.

She had noone from the past as far as she knew, Jake and Kayla had abandoned her and she had no way of knowing who were her real friends now. All she knew is that she would go home and try and fix the mess her dream had created, and hopefully rejoin the tour a little happier and secure. As of right now all she knew is that she was going to be starting a long and tiring schedule in a few days to promote her album and the tour. And as every second past that hectic was closer and her sanity was hanging by a thin line.

************************** Jayme knocked on the door that once seemed so familiar, that once she would just barge into whenever necessary, but now she lied to herself saying she was trying to surprise her Mom and Dad, but in reality this house and her memories were strangers and she felt awkward walking into the house, her own house.

He mother answered the door and gasped, "Oh Jayme. What are you doing here, oh my God I have missed you so much, give me a hug."

Jayme and her mother hugged for what seemed like and eternity, her father joined them showing the same emotion and after Jayme explained the reason she was there and that it was only for a few days she also explained that today was honors day for the students at school and she wanted to be there when Jake received a basketball award that had been planned for months by the school.

Her parents understood and she borrowed their car hoping to catch Jake as happy to see her as her parents were, but a voice deep down told her she wasn't ready for what was coming.

**************************** "And Jake we wish you a great future........." Jayme heard only that as she entered the gymnasium, she was just in time to congratulate him on his award.

Her stomach was tied in knots and she almost cried when she saw Jake standing in the middle of the gym holding up the award smiling.

As she started to walk to him she saw Kayla also walking towards him, but what she saw next would shatter her whole world, her best friend walked up to her boyfriend and congratulated him by giving him a passionate kiss and a more than friendly hug.

He heart stopped but she kept walking towards them, anger building up in her every step of the way, Kayla looked over Jake's shoulder and saw Jayme, she loosened her grip on Jake still watching Jayme. Jake turned around, suddenly with guilt written all over his face. Jayme stopped in front of them with no idea as to what to say, whatever came out would be the end of it.

"Well, well well, what do we have here." She started unaware of how calm she sounded and of what, exactly, she was going to say.

"Jayme.........uh.......what are you doing here?" Jake spoke first.

"Oh I was here to surprise my family and best friend and to congratulate my BOYFRIEND on his award." Jake scrunched up his face as if he had been hit when she emphasized the word "boyfriend."

"Jayme........." Kayla started.

"Shut the hell up you bitch." Jayme snapped. "You were my best friend, and you......" She pointed her attention to Jake. "You were my boyfriend. How could I ever have expected you to be trusted, that was obviously asking way too much."

"Jayme you were gone, you never called or wrote or E-mailed, we can't wait until your ready to visit, we moved on. And we fell for each other. What were we supposed to do while you were on some stupid pop fantasy mission?" Jake defended himself.

"Oh fantasy huh, yeah? Well, my single is number one and my album is finished, it is expected to do just as well. And now that you mention it, why on earth am I wasting my time on nobody's when I have people like Britney Spears for best friends and the Backstreet Boys for boyfriends." Jake and Kayla were taken aback at how smug and evil Jayme sounded.

"Jayme we're best friends but I like Jake, I'm sorry but why didn't you ever call?" Kayla asked desperately trying to save her friendship.

"Best friends? Please. I have better things to do and better people to hang out with, infact I may leave early, Nick Carter wants me to join him at his house on the beach." Jayme lied knowing very well that Kayla had a celebrity crush on Nick and Jake hated boybands favorites.

"Jayme look hate me all you want, but don't hate Kayla." Jake said trying to smooth things over for Kayla and Jayme.

"I hate you both but what does that matter." Jayme asked turning her back to them but then facing them once more. "I'm rich, famous and on my way to much more, I'm so much better than you guys, and I'm not wasting any more of my time as of right now." Jayme turned her back to them noticing the shocked expressions on their faces and walked out of the gymnasium and out of their lives.

When she reached the car she had tears in her eyes as she tried to unlock the car door. Once finally inside she started crying, "What did I just do?" She asked herself as she pulled out of the parking lot. She cried most of the way home trying to desperately stay on the road.

********************************** "Those two days off were not near enough for me." Nick complained as all five guys made themselves as comfortable as possible on the plane that would lead them to another state, for another show.

"Nick shut up your always complaining about something." AJ said frustrated at how childish Nick was behaving.

Nick ignored this and walked to the front of the plane and began talking to a stewartist.

"What's he doing now?" Brian asked.

"Who knows what Nicky ever does." Kevin responded.

Nick came back over to where the guys were and things his bags and began leaving.

"Where are you going?" Asked Brian.

Nick turned to face them and said, "I don't feel like sitting with you guys." Then marched up to another seat and sat down.

"I can't believe him." Howie said.

"He has been upset with us before but has never refused to sit with us." Brian commented.

"Just let him calm down." Kevin stated laying his head back and closing his eyes.

************************** "You don't mind if I set here do you?" Nick asked the person next to him.

The woman turned to look at him and Nick was surprised he hadn't recognized her before. She looked so lonely, afraid, and lost. Her eyes showed no emotion, and she stared at him as if she didn't see him at all.

"No go ahead." Replied Jayme.

Nick set next to her and turned to Brian who was staring at him, obviously not aware of why Nick was so upset, in fact, Nick wasn't aware of why he was so upset. He turned his attention back to Jayme and said, "So how do you like touring so far?"

"It's fine." Jayme said not turning her head from the window.

"We haven't seen much of you hanging around what do you do with your spare time?" Nick asked trying to break her from her gaze.

"Nothing."

"Oh." It was hopeless and Nick didn't know why she seemed so out of it. He took his portable CD player out and began listening to Limp Bizkit, he didn't know Jayme that well or why she was so upset but he didn't feel like finding out just yet.

************************** "Okay Jayme your on in 30 seconds." Yelled the stage manager at that nights concert. Her dancers rushed out on stage and she took her place secretly praying the crowed didn't realize how upset and lost she felt.

"Good luck." She heard someone say behind her, she turned to see Nick standing there in boxers obviously getting dressed for the show.

"Thanks." She said trying not to spend too much time looking at his body.

He turned and walked away and her eyes followed him, she saw Howie give her thumbs up and smiled in return.

"Okay 5, 4, 3, 2............."

The lights dimmed and the music began. Jayme sang her heart out and found herself enjoying herself for the first time in weeks. She had a smile on her face she knew wouldn't give herself away.

After her set was over she went backstage and wished the guys good luck giving all of them hugs. She had been on tour with them for about a month but didn't really get to know them well.

"Hey Jayme why don't you go to a club with us tonight?" AJ asked.

"No thanks its not really my style. Maybe next time."

"Awww a party pooper, your too much like Nick."

"Hey!" Nick said smiling towards Jayme.

Jayme smiled back and for the first time in a long time she actually felt happy, that all changed when thoughts of Jake and Kayla went through her mind. She hadn't talked to either one of them since the scene in the gymnasium. She had went home and slept all night and half the next day, she woke up with only time to shower, eat and make it to the airport. She didn't talk to her parents much, especially about what happened. She felt lost. She hated what had happened and what she was going through. She wanted it all to end. She wanted her old life back, her old family, her old friend, her old happiness. She wasn't happy anymore and it was almost unbelievable that the one thing she loved most, singing, was what made her so unhappy.

She left the arena and headed back to the hotel, signing a few autographs along the way. She tried to sleep knowing very well that she had a photo shoot, an appearance on Jay Leno and MTV's Total Request Live, and a show scheduled tomorrow in New York. But her mind kept seeing images of Jake and Kayla kissing in her mind. She hadn't expected this from either one of them, but less from Kayla. They had been friends for so long. How could she do that to her?

She heard a knock at the door that startled her. She thought it might be Lindsay but they hadn't really talked in a while, she basically didn't spend much time with anyone, she shut herself out from the world, then she thought it might be Howie but he was gone to a club.

"Shit." She cursed as she hit her toe on a table next to the door, she opened it and was surprised to see Nick standing on the other side. They hadn't really talked much, she knew he had set next to her on the plane ride there but that was about it. And then there was him wishing her good luck before her set that night.

"Hey." She said.

"Hey, I thought you might be here. I thought since we both don't wanna go to a club we could do something else."

"Okay sure." Jayme said unsure of why he was asking her if she wanted to hang out, and also a bit disappointed like many nights before she preferred staying cooped up in the hotel room.

"There's a gift shop here where we can buy a movie and watch it, if you want to."

"Okay just let me slip something on, you can come in."

"That's okay I'll meet you down in the gift shop. Okay?"

"Okay see ya in a minute."

Jayme made her way to her bed where she had laid sweatpants out on and slipped them on over her boxer shorts. She then pulled some slippers on and headed downstairs.

*************************** Nick looked around the section of movies finding they didn't have much of a selection. He was feeling kind of awkward about hanging out with Jayme but he felt so alone tonight, more alone then he had ever felt. That wasn't the only reason, he knew that there was something about her that he needed to find out. He had remembered the sparkle in her eyes from the first time they met from her anger over the aspirin and also from her first couple of shows. Now her eyes were sad or emotionless.

He looked over towards the door to see Jayme walking in. He smiled and waved her way. She walked towards him, her eyes wandering around looking at everything, anything, but him.

"Hey." She said looking at the movies. "See anything you like?"

"No, there's really nothing all that great here."

"What about this?" Jayme asked reaching for Coyote Ugly.

"I've never seen that before."

"Oh My God, you HAVE to see this movie. It is so good. I went to the theatre to see this with Jake, my boyfriend............" Jayme trailed off and looked down at her feet embarrassed. "I mean my ex-boyfriend." She corrected herself.

"I broke up with someone not too long ago also. I'm sorry."

"Thanks. So do you wanna see this or not?"

"Sure. I'm buying."

"No, it's okay I can."

"No, I can."

"Don't worry about it."

"Okay but I'm buying something to eat."

"Okay."

Jayme hoped that this would make her feel a little better. She felt as if walls were surrounding her and there was no way to ever be happy again. She wanted to feel the way she used to, and she had no idea if she ever would again or not.

*************** Nick silently prayed that he would have a good time tonight without thinking about Amanda. Jayme seemed nice enough and had obviously been through the same thing he had. He knew that much be why she seemed so upset and withdrawn. He felt bad for her and only hoped she would eventually be happy again, he also hoped he too would happy again someday.

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