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Monday, 23 February 2004

Me, the Internet Palace, and a Diary Open. Less Than Fascinating


Topic: Eurotrash
So what's been going on?

Sunday: I did my washing. That may seem simple, and if I could work out a way to get my washing machine from the third floor of a flat in East London to Pengeistical Paradise, then it might actually become simple. However, currently I'm at the mercy of Service Wash Mistress, who is one who likes to scold excessively. This week I returned ten minutes later than the time she suggested. I should have known she likes to go on a break at that moment, it turns out. That in fact she's quite entitled to shut the shop and go home during that break if she wants to. And that would show me to turn up at the right time. Plus, manmade fibres in pillow protector cases will melt in a hot dryer, so I'm a terribly, evil soul, for asking her to wash some. She bundled the wet ones in a bag with my dry washing to teach me the error of my ways.
It's not me being rude or overly middle class (in that bullying wheedling kind of way that sets my teeth on edge when I hear other pushy middle class types complaining) - I'm passive to the point of supine in any confrontation that I don't care about winning. (Note the implied codicil, please; I love real confrontations.)
Fourteen pounds, correct change please. Next instalment this Saturday. Let's see what she can think of for me to do wrong by then.

Monday: my parents came to visit my new flat. I tried to make them walk the two miles uphill to Dulwich or Crystal Palace (and ergo any cafe that doesn't serve a side order of melted lard with any order, drinks included), but they moaned and whined and complained. Blimey, i thought my parents went yomping on the Wiltshire Downs every weekend. Was I surprised. And not a bit relieved.
So we decided to grab some food - from the nearest pub, because my mum's poor shell shocked tootsies were hurting (snnnn, would never dare say this to her face, but as she'll be reading this from home, she's out of thumping distance). So we went in the pub whose grammatical horror of a name: "The Two Half's" has me wincing every time I pass it, where the horrible seats and chairs of yore have been ripped out, and replaced by a caribbean pool parlour.
Ordering fish n chips, you don't expect that much - you do, however, expect not to catch them pulling a plate out of the freezer to go straight into the microwave, and you certainly don't expect to find a wimpy burger salt packet nestling secretly underneath your mouldy damp chips. Sigh.

Ack, a fight breaks out agaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain in the internet palace. I'll finish this tomorrow. Arrrrgh.


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Vanessa/Female/31-35. Lives in United Kingdom/London/East London/Bow, speaks English and German. Spends 40% of daytime online. Uses a Normal (56k) connection. And likes Literature / Movies/Food / Eating / Drinking.
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i say, "FUCK!"

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This page graced by sarsparilla at 9:12 PM GMT
Updated: Saturday, 28 February 2004 6:05 PM GMT
Post Comment | View Comments (11) | Permalink | Share This Post

Monday, 23 February 2004 - 10:19 PM GMT

Name: Legomen
Home Page: http://legomenis.blogspot.com/

Damn those grammatical thingies'

Anyhoo, Penge sounds just like Feltham. My laundry lady there used to give me long lectures about stuff in the pockets..thank goodness I now live in Hampton and have a reasonably well behaved washing machine..

Monday, 23 February 2004 - 10:32 PM GMT

Name: Kat
Home Page: http://www.mostlyfluff.blogspot.com

The grammatical horror of a name should have served as an omen. Are you sure that was fish you were served? :0)

Monday, 23 February 2004 - 10:56 PM GMT

Name: billy
Home Page: http://billyworld.typepad.com/

...the most shocking statement in that whole post is the revelation that your parents read your blog...you are a far, far braver person than I :^)...

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 3:08 AM GMT

Name: Fi
Home Page: http://scorpiogirl.co.nz

Argh! Pet hate! Grammatical errors on public signs. Maybe the signwriter had a few too many pints before?

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 10:09 AM GMT

Name: Laura
Home Page: http://www.bridgetwho.blogspot.com

Blimey. i'm with billy. i'd want the ground to swallow me up whole if my folks, especially my dad, ever read my blog.

I love it though, you invite your parents to see your flat but you feel the need to take them somewhere else entirely when they get there. Penge/Sydenham... really are that bad

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 10:51 AM GMT

Name: NC

hand washing and mangles might do the trick, either that or resigning your self to smelling stinky ;-)

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 12:43 PM GMT

Name: Looby

That's what I thought! Should my parents ever learn to work anything more complicated than a tv zapper, you wouldn't see me for dust!

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 5:46 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

Reminds me of that spoof sensationalist headline in The Onion - "Mom Finds Son's Blog!" Subheading: "Gets To Know Him Better"

Horror of horrors, eh? ;)

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 5:49 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

I am onion, hear me roar.

Tuesday, 24 February 2004 - 5:49 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

Someone in the fight at the LA Fitness Internet cafe was yelling "I'm not no Sydenham D*ckhead, you know!"

anyway, i'VE NOTICED THAT PEOPLE WHO MOVE *TO* lONDON WHEN THEY REACH ADULTHOOD ALWAYS DO THE SAME THING - THEY TAKE VISITORS OUT TO PARKS. pEOPLE COME TO lONDON HOPING TO SEE THE wEST eND, THE SHOPS --- OOOPS, Freudian caps - --- and we're so desperate for greenery that we take them to the bloody park. What's that all about?

Wednesday, 25 February 2004 - 3:17 AM GMT

Name: Lux
Home Page: http://www.shylux.blogspot.com

Grammatical errors are the new black. On Eurotrash's blog, it's become a recurring joke to type its instead of it's, and your instead of you're.

Also, have you been to yourallgay.com?

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