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Saturday, 14 February 2004

Tales of the Urban Burbs #6

Welcome to a new stage - no longer a commuter, now a Burb Dweller, I get to enjoy only the Social Commute.
One problem. Why can't I read a train timetable? Somehow the fact that my local train line runs from London Bridge through Penge, Croydon and then back up to Victoria throws my sense of direction off totally. That's a train from London to London, fact fans. Blew a few of my synapses.
Anyway, going back into the city centre really brings home to you the age barriers of the city. I mean the disparity between the twentysomethingness of Soho and the creakysomethingness of the Urban Burbs. Hell, I don't look even a little bit old out here ... and a fortnight away from the city gates and London is suddenly transformed into somewhere with that weird film set feel (much like NYC when you spot a steaming subway vent, and have to check round for possible sightings of Dick Tracy).

London Bridge station, though, emphatically is not a place for tourists. It's a local station, for Commuter People.
A map, ma'am? I couldn't possibly. Advice on what line is quickest, ma'am? I'm very much afraid that I couldn't tell you. Directions, ma'am? Oh dear, no. I'm sure I couldn't help you, ma'am. Allow me to ask my LUL colleagues. (These would be the LUL fuckwits who later advised me that Charing Cross is definitely on the Jubilee line...)

Waiting for a tube. Then the next tube. Then the next. The next. And the next.
It dawns on me that it's not actually going to get less crowded in here, and I'd better board one of the things. This actually isn't crowded by London standards. Just give in, and shove.
Still my new touristical status means I get to be far more brash and intrusive with my camera, and never have to worry about sporting the appropriate social class identifiers. And the people. Colourful. Pretty.
I can't stop staring.
Is my mouth hanging open?

This page graced by sarsparilla at 4:13 PM GMT
Updated: Saturday, 14 February 2004 4:27 PM GMT
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Saturday, 14 February 2004 - 7:38 PM GMT

Name: Legomen
Home Page:

Crikey you have moved out from smoke haven't you?.

Welcome to mainline loops and trains that arrive back at their origin if you fall asleep on them late at night (done once)
Welcome to branch line shenanigans were it suddenly branches off into the sticks and one can wake up in a dark carriage, parked in a dindgy siding (done twice), with the alomst imperceptible sound of duelling banjos wafting through the grills.
Welcome to seats and only three people reading your paper over your shoulder.
Welcome to manually operated doors and guard announcements that sound as if they are being yelled by a drunk anglophobe.
Welcome to fools with bicycles who take them onto the train with them.
Welcome to drunkards weeing in the corner of the carriage as the journey home is too long for them to maintain containment.
Welcome to colour and individual expression of the dumbest variety....

Monday, 16 February 2004 - 1:16 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

Lol, I fear you may be absolutely correct.....

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