Site hosted by Build your free website today!
« January 2004 »
1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31
Thursday, 22 January 2004

A Lightbulb Switches On

Harv came over from Hamburg last night and gave me some of the sort of advice that makes you sit bolt upright in your chair and wonder how the hell you didn't think of that yourself. That 'of couuuuuurse' moment when something just makes sense.
He says he's said it before, and so I'm sure have others, but it was only this time that it triggered my dull creaking brain into action. I feel so much better now. I'm getting cracking on the plan right away.
I'd sat in the hall cupboard before going out, wondering if I could fit a bed in there, and hide, irrationally. Meeting up with Harv in a weirdly unFrench French restaurant in Mayfair (why do all Mayfair bistros make you think of Michael Caine, somehow?), we were sat too close to other tables. The candles, attentive waiters and darkened panelled ambience conveyed enough false air of intimacy to ignore people at the next table, four inches away, just sufficent for the film star next to us to avoid eye contact. But the idea we weren't crushed together unnaturally was patently false - I could have twitched a muscle sleepily and touched someone on either side. It was silly to pretend this wasn't happening. We couldn't help but talk to people either side of us. It would have been weird not to notice that when we spoke, their candle flickered.
Sometimes you can't keep up the pretence that you have enough space to breathe comfortably. The light above my head pinged on, and I decided what to do.
He said what was going on in the ever bleachening ever emptying house I built with Wickedex was too hard to cope with; impossible to ignore it, insane to try. He said move out. Move out now. Do it right away.

This page graced by sarsparilla at 7:10 AM GMT
Updated: Thursday, 22 January 2004 7:31 AM GMT
Post Comment | View Comments (12) | Permalink | Share This Post

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 10:16 AM GMT

Name: billy
Home Page:

...does sound sensible...although wickedex will take some of the physical things - the memories will remain...
this is the place we did...
it was here we...
I remember the night we stood holding hands looking at...
..a move will bring a clean slate and a new begining :^)...

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 11:39 AM GMT

Name: Francesca
Home Page:

Methinks that is good advice. Good luck. It will be hard, but no harder than anything else in life worth fighting for.

That restaurant: not Le Boudin Blanc, by any chance ?

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 1:22 PM GMT

Name: Legomen
Home Page:

Simple, effective and probably correct in the long term. Neither is it running away nor ignoring issues.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 1:24 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

The very same! You know it? Was that you at the next table? Heh.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 3:37 PM GMT

Name: Francesca
Home Page:

No. I mean, yes. Gah !

I mean, I was not at the next table, but I do know it very well. I work a skip and a spit away.

Lovely place, good food, but hard not to rub elbows with your nearest neighbours (and passing staff).

Wine list far beyond my budget these days :(

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 4:32 PM GMT

Name: Terry
Home Page:

Does Harv do requests? I'd like some 'of couuuuuurse' moments too.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 5:23 PM GMT

Name: Cyn
Home Page: http://http;//

I think perhaps all of us could benefit from a bit of "Harv from Hamburg's" sage advice every now and again.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 6:13 PM GMT

Name: Anne
Home Page:

Now why didn't I think of that? Living there must be a daily grind, seeing everything as it is now, remembering it as it was. Go Harry!

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 7:09 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

Ah. He's Harv, because I couldn't be bothered to type out my more usual HarvardBoy. I believe you grow em over there, not this side o' the sea.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 7:14 PM GMT

Name: Kat
Home Page:

Good on Harv. Short, simple, to the point and right on top of that.

Now why in the h*ll did I think you were already working on moving out?

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 7:15 PM GMT

Name: Pseudo Boz

Take photos of your feet less often, that will make all your problems go away.

Thursday, 22 January 2004 - 7:22 PM GMT

Name: Vanessa

Kat asked: Now why in the h*ll did I think you were already working on moving out?

Because I'm trying to sell the flat, then buy another - but the way it works in the UK is it takes ages to sell it, and there's no point going for the next one till you've got a firm offer from someone. So I was already working on moving out in the sitting still and doing nothing sense, yes.

View Latest Entries