By now, days had passed. I was sitting in a hotel room in Orlando, Florida. Things were back to normal...... sort of! I know you're probably wondering who the phone call was from, the one that I had ignored. Well, use your imagination and I bet you'll come up with an answer. If you're thinking it was Lauren, you're wrong.
That's right, it was Kim. I ignored her call because I wasn't sure if I really wanted to believe anything anymore! I was back to being myself, doubting everyone and everything. I was pretty sure that I didn't want to know anything about women anymore. She had left me a message, actually...... a few! I still hadn't taken her calls, and I hadn't returned them, either......
"Hey Zac, this is Kim. I've been calling you for the past few days but I always get your voice mail. Is something wrong? Did I do something? I don't know, anyway, when you get this message, could you call me back? Please, I really want to talk to you. You have the number. I miss you, Zac. Bye."
She wasn't the one that caused me to be like this, and I was hurting her feelings by ignoring her. I was scared, what if she turned out to be just like the others? But, on the other hand, what if she was different? What if she was the one, and I let her slip away? I had thought about her, alot actually. She was so wonderful, and she hadn't expected anything from me the days she spent with me. So why was I having such a hard time picking up the phone and calling her back?
Taylor and Isaac had gotten back to their normal lives, and I had nursed my sore nose for days! Tay had really clocked me a good one, I even ended up with black eyes! I was somewhat back to normal now, but mom still insisted on me taking care of it. She treated me like such a baby!
Things were more different now than they had ever been. Dad had noticed the change in me, but kept it to himself, not wanting to bring attention to me. And I just sat in my room, or in my bunk all the time. I was constantly on the verge of tears. All I had to do was pick up the damned phone, and I couldn't bring myself to do it! I kept beating myself up over it, and I knew in my heart that Kim wasn't the one I was mad at, yet I still couldn't do it, I just couldn't call her. I was being such a jerk! All she wanted was to help, and be my friend, and I knew that deep down in my heart!
"Hello?"
"Hey, can you come to my room? I need to talk to someone." I said.
"Yeah, give me a minute, ok?"
"Alright." I hung up the phone. See, I could pick up the phone, I just couldn't bring myself to dial her number. I was going to lose her, I knew it!
I got up and opened my door, hearing footsteps outside of my room.
"Hey son, what's up?" Dad asked me. He sat down on my bed as I shut the door and sat down next to him.
"I need help with something. You remember Kim? The girl I told you about? She's been calling me, and I just can't bring myself to take her calls." I sighed heavily.
"Does this have anything to do with what happened in Boston?" He asked but had a knowing look on his face.
"Dad, I know you know the answer to that. You know I haven't been myself lately." I said quietly.
"Yes Zac, I do know. Did she ever give you any reason at all, to doubt her?"
"No dad, she didn't. But I just can't bring myself to pick up the phone and call her back. I'm afraid of losing her, and I don't want that! She is a nice person, and I want to keep her in my life....but, I'm scared. What if she's like the rest of them? What if she turns out like them?" I said, I was going to cry, I could feel it. But I tried to compose myself, I didn't want dad to see me like this!
"Well son, I honestly don't know if she's like the others, but if you feel in your heart that she's a good person....well then you know what you have to do. You either have to let her down easy and tell her that it can't work, or you have to give it a chance, and take that risk that things will be how they will be. Zac, I know that you know the answer, and I can see it in your eyes. But you have to tell her." He put his arms around me and I sobbed quietly against my father's chest.
I did know what I had to do, my father was right. But I knew it was going to be the hardest thing I would ever have to do!
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