The conversation, from my rushed agent went like this:
Agent  "Oh, you said you didn't do casino work.
But wait, you did casino work for me.
You do do casino work, don't you?"
Me  "Yes, I have a spine of sponge. Yes, I will do casino work."

I've always thought it wise for stage and screen actor's to not reveal their political partisanship. There are many reasons for my stand. One is economic. Your political beliefs could greatly upset at least one half of your possible audience, causing them to avoid any future performances. There are several individuals who prior to their "coming out" I was happy to be entertained by them. Happy to part with $4.50 for a matinee movie show. Hey! I'm poor. Now that they've become part-time politicians, I skip their productions. Of course, it seems as these thespians step off the acting stage onto the soapbox is also around the time their acting skills have degenerated to the point that they are left with only the ability to lie with a straight face. Which, come to think of it, always has been counted as a useful attribute in the political scene. The mediums of stage, screen and television are in themselves mediums of discovery, education and protest. Theater has been used for millennia to affect opinions and change minds and moods. When an actor overtly reveals and publicly promotes his or her strongly felt political beliefs the fourth wall tumbles down. You and all the character's you portray are typecast with the political beliefs you have broadcast. It becomes impossible for many in your audience to willingly suspend disbelief long enough to partake of your performance. Many people will shut down and not listen to what your character has to say. And that's my point, as actors we are to be crystal clear vessels for the authors and musicians messages. When we take on a political tint it becomes impossible for many in our audience to peer beyond that tint.

07/16/2004:
Commercials, Casino's & Ticket Counts
Glimpsing at the Gila River Casino television commercial featuring a middle-aged actor who could have been me, caused a grimace to flash across my face. Understand if it wasn't for my sincere belief that Arizona casino's exist simply to prey on the unlikely hopes of our senior citizens (who, only naturally, enjoy playing the slots more than they do paying for their own prescriptions). Accepting casino-work, I might be raking in $500 a day plus mileage instead of grossing $470 a week with my mileage only rarely even a "tax deductible" expense. Instead, I've been working anywhere from a rare five-day forty hour week to a more profitable, seventy-two or even eighty-eight hour seven-day work week. Work weeks during which, now and again, I find myself forcing smiles while dealing with anxious, difficult, and sometimes drugged, assholes, most of the time feeling wearier than a pallbearer at Marlon Brando's funeral, but still certainly enduring an experience which can only exquisitely prepare me for work on a Hollywood set <grin>.

The other evening I had a brief verbal tarry with an instantly recognizable celebrity. He told me he was <insert celebrity name here> and I replied that that was good because he was wearing <insert celebrity name here> face. It went on from there, as he proved himself to be as warm and delightful in person as is his on-air personality.

Being as I am destined, at some not too far in the future date, for a "piece of the gross", I found a May 21st, 2004 article in the WSJ, Hollywood Report by John Lippman, to be enlightening on exactly how studios estimate ticket sales on new releases. Each individual theater tracks the actual money collected by the box office. This includes the count of full price tickets and discounted tickets sold, but they report only the dollar totals to the tabulating companies, who then forward the totals from all the theaters to the studios. This is why sometimes a movie, usually a G-rated one, because of its far larger possible audience, has actually filled more seats (albeit with cheaper matinee & discounted tickets) but may have a smaller total dollar take reported than a competing film. For instance, if a movie had sold 50 $4.00 matinee tickets and 50 $7.00 full price tickets for a total of $550.00 while another movie might tally a take of $560, ten dollars more but sold only 80, $7.00 full price tickets, the later movie would be rated as the more popular.

06/08/2004:
The Price of Fame
Late in May of 2004, Dr. Malamud, Mr. Wonderful and I were watching the movie, The Sum of All Fears based on the phone book thick Tom Clancy paperback of the same name. Everything was great. The plot, the words, the action, the cinematography, the special effects, everything (except the main character played by Ben Affleck) were so outstanding that I would consider parting with a dear Hamilton to purchase the pre-viewed Blockbuster DVD. We all noticed the error in casting Ben Affleck as CIA analyst Ryan at the same instant. Observing Mr. Affleck, we felt that every glance, every head turn, every word, every step, looked like it was forced, pre-planned and over-rehearsed. In my estimation, what the cleft-chinned Mr. Affleck suffers from is that his viewing public knows too much about his off-screen life. Those of you not familiar with the workings of being a film-celebrity need to realize that every single opportunity for off-screen exposure is planned, considered and managed. Photos are bought and photos are posed. Even so, the hirsute Mr. Affleck, in the understandable hubris of youth, swelled with the massive ego of the emotionally immature, has allowed himself to become classically over-exposed. Think of it, how much do you know of the personal lives of the two much older actors featured in The Sum of All Fears, James Crowell and Morgan Freeman? Speaking of unknown character actor's seen in the movies, Tuesday, I had one of these anonymous thespian's (not to be confused with Scientology's Body Thetans) drive into my tony north Scottsdale gated community. After speaking with the handsome fellow and his attractive wife, coddled within the Connally leather upholstered confines of a 2004 SC430 Lexus sporting out of state license plates, after mere minutes, I had recognized his face, his voice and the way he manipulated his upper body. However, even after I had written down his name, and judged him to be a courteous, intelligent and respectful gentleman, I still had absolutely no idea who he was.

05/20/2004:
Endowing and The Future
Your Master Thespian, like many actors, has wild swings of emotions. The emotions we use on stage are the same emotions we carry to work and are the same emotions that either hinder or help our careers. Even being extremely right-brained, i.e., analytical, I still find many of my decisions are not made on the basis of outright fact, but on the rush of emotion. Unfortunately, again like many dramatists, I will, for the remainder of my life be battling with shrugging off the negative longcoat of melancholy whose pockets, rather than holding the ubiquitous "Inspected by #13", hold tags that read, #1: "You're too busy at work!" or #2: "You need the overtime, you can't be in that movie!" or #5: "You're too tired to be on stage!" Sigh.

Endowing is a method (yes, I can be categorized as a 'method' actor) I employ that can give extreme emotional power to a simple, inanimate object. (This power is similar to being yanked back to a very specific time and place in your past whenever you sniff a particular fragrance, say orange blossoms - which brings me back to being on the roof of First Christian Church on 7th Avenue in 1967, with my girlfriend Jeanie Bateman. Or the soaring spirits that overtake you upon hearing, say the 1960s group, Spanky and Our Gang singing Lazy Day. Yes, I know, most of my reader's weren't even alive in the 1960s.) At first glance, "endowing" sounds kind of stupid, doesn't it? Let me explain how it works. For example, a recent performance ended up with my character meekly giving "God" a gift. (Please, don't get wrapped-up in the religious implications, concentrate on the technique, the concept.) So, I'm given a crown made of plastic covered with red felt. The felt is then studded with precious jewels. To endow this piece of plastic covered in cheap felt adorned by plastic jewels with enough value to make it the most important and valuable gift I had ever given, this is what I did. I imagined I had sold everything I owned to buy the gold and gems and pay for the craftsman to forge and assemble the crown. In my mind, I went through every one of my favorite possessions and sold them. And who I sold them to. And how much money I got from each sale. To free hundreds of dollars each month to spend on my most important gift, I moved from my tony Scottsdale apartment into a KOA Kampground, and spent the money that I formerly used to pay rent, instead on the crown. In my imaginary world, I worked sixteen hour days and came home wearied. I drove over to the goldsmith, purchased the gold bullion and watched him create the alloy that would become the crown. I stood in awe as he cast the crown, tapped it out of the form and began to sand and endlessly polish it. I saw myself going to my favorite jeweler and picking out and buying one gem at a time. I basically obsessed over the creation of this crown. (Of course, at this point, my non-thespian, soon-to-be-ex-wife-numero-uno, would intone, Laurence Oliver-like, "Well, why don't you just act?") I kept adding ten more things. I'd find a favorite possession I had not sold and went out and sold it and upgraded a jewel or bought more gold alloy. When I presented my gift to "God" do you imagine that I came across to the audience as giving something of extreme value or the $2.00 felt lined plastic crown bought four years ago at Mardi Gras? Using the same method, I had already made the actor playing God (not to be confused with the David Duchovny movie of the same name) "God". Does that seem like a lot to do for an unpaid speaking part in a church play with only three performances? Well, I'd rather do that than work outside the theater forty plus hours a week . . . the only problem is, I can't seem to get paid for it.

04/15/2004:
Caiaphas Croaks at Church
As Easter neared Master Thespian readied himself for his annual appearance as the pharisee, Benjamin, in my church's Passion Play. However, this year, since the actor who normally plays Caiaphas was out of the country, the 24 line, six-scenes-in-the-spotlight part was offered to me. (Caiaphas is the pharisee who in a later scene utters, "Let His blood be on our heads . . .") If you are a trained actor, or like myself, a somewhat trained actor, and you sometimes ponder that you haven't really learned much, I urge you to get cast in a play that uses a majority of totally untrained actors. Speaking of not learning anything, due to director-demanded yelling, it was the first time I'd ever lost my voice in a performance. I was very lucky that I only had to croak through a Friday, Saturday and Sunday show. Some scenes were so loud that the actor playing the balcony pacing Pilate had to wear an earpiece keyed to my own mike. Performing with untrained actors also forced me to concentrate on my own character to a much higher degree than usual. Because in any one scene, I may be the only character with the drive and focus to keep the action and interest stumbling along. Thanks to my Herberger training, I was able to become 90% Caiaphas and only 10% Robert, so that even though for the half a dozen instances when I was the prime focus of five hundred pairs of eyeballs, I never had to fret about forgetting lines. Why? Because I was Caiaphas and how could Caiaphas forget what he was going to say? It's such a relief to me to be able to funnel my thinking along those channels. Did I work hard on memorizing my lines before and between rehearsals? Sure. Did I use many of my patented memorizing tricks? Sure. But do you know what the biggest help was to my memorizing? Time. Even though we had only eleven rehearsals spaced over thirty-one days (and my part changed after the first two get-togethers) every day I remembered more and more of my lines. I find the sooner I begin the effort of memorizing, the sooner I can shed the fear of forgetting words and get onto the more important task of giving those words the life, the energy that will grab the attention of my audiences.

3/05/2004:
Audition Ignites Acting Embers
Your Master Thespian, after passing up on a commercial audition that might have earned me ten times more per hour than I reap as the finest security guard in my zip code +4 area, instead went in for a stipend-pay-only weekend television show try-out last Friday. I memorized the four or five lines I'd been given and decided that rather than reciting a one minute memorized spiel, I would just talk ad hoc. Talk off the cuff. Thursday evening, determined to memorize the lines and firmly cement my audition attitude, I managed to remain sober enough to steer the mighty Hyundai within a single lane east to the Pima Road Barnes & Noble. Into my denim cloth totebag (quite similar to what downtown bag-ladies trundle around hugging to their chest) I had stuffed my well-thumbed, film-class text book, Secrets of Screen Acting. Reviewing its pages, I was once again reminded of how very different camera-style acting is from the stage. Basically, anyone can be a well paid actor on the telly or in the movies (Arnold, Steven Segal, & Anna Nichol Smith for examples) but not so on the live "one-take" stage. Since an actor cannot just sit and memorize productively for more than about twenty minutes at a squat, I arose and wandered over to ample "Film/TV" section of the store. I grabbed Which lie did I tell? and brought it back to my huge dark oak study table. What an interesting book. A book I intend to purchase as soon as I have the money. At the Friday afternoon audition I arrived a half hour early, and they were ahead of schedule (very rare in this business) so I almost immediately was ushered into the darkened room already occupied by the production people and the client, all seated behind Reuben, the cameraman. I cannot believe how not nervous I am anymore. I don't know if this is because I really do not want the work i.e., that I don't expect to win the part, or due to the fact that I'm half a century old, been acting for twelve years and meet and greet and kiss the asses of up to 500 different people each day. I felt it went okay. I think they liked me - which I don't think matters. I did my thing, thanked them, and scurried out of the building. I think the biggest factor keeping me from the television screen is my size, because even though I've remained a constant forty pounds below my former weight, I'm certain I'm still pretty darn large and distracting on the screen.

12/23/2003:
Who Says You Can't Laugh at Church?
As a few of you know, your Master Thespian is a 'Bible-Beating' Christian. As a matter of fact, the only reason I am around to bore you with these electronic scribblings is because Jesus Christ stepped into my life thirty six years ago and literally jerked the six shooter out of my hand. And this was long before Jose Cuervo Girls and their six shooters. I experienced a theophany. A couple of assumptions that I find keep people away from JC and His church (where He hangs a lot) is that non-church-Go'ers falsely believe (or have heard, or worse, have been taught) that they can no longer have fun if they attend church. (Another thing is, that as church members, they believe that they may no longer sin, and if they do, they must feel extremely guilty about it and go about in sack cloth and ashes. That's a whole different issue. But, I'll give you a hint, you cannot, not sin. And your guilt is not the answer. Jehovah God does not want you sad, He wants you happy.) With that overly long preface, here's how, as Christian actor's, we had great fun in church one particular Sunday. As with any organization, this group of 150 families had challenges and differences and many varying points of view. Our creative and whacky director had written a skit to bring these contentious issues out into the open. The preacher (who, with his wife founded the non-denominational church, was in on the gig) and innocently began by announcing the annual Church Revival with the stated goal that all current church members bring in a certain number of non-Christian friends. The pews were peppered with members of our acting troupe, but that wasn't the least bit suspicious, because we were all regular church attenders anyway. Although, an astute Christian might have noticed that, as individuals, we were not in our habitual 'pew-locations.' As Pastor Paul continued, a few general questions are asked from the audience (the troupe) and a few parishioner's not knowing they were witnessing a performance, also raised their hands to speak. Within minutes, as the actors worked through their memorized lines, the presentation grew into a heated discussion ranging from the choice of the carpet color to the church finances, with your Master Thespian abruptly shooting up his hand and angrily stating, "You know all I ever hear about anymore is you guys talking about money . . . " Shortly thereafter the whole thing breaks down to the players shouting and accusing each other, which was quite believable because several of them were unruly teenagers anyway. The pews were in turmoil. Chaos threatened to reign. Finally, the "Voice of Reason Person" stands (our director) and in a fairly decent Captain James T. Kirk impersonation, commands everyone's attention with a loud: "People! People! It's not about carpeting, or money or anything else. It's about people loving other people. That's what it's about . . . Just . . . Love . . . Sweet . . . Love . . . " At which point the piano player begins playing the first notes of the song made famous by Dionne Warwick and lately by Wynonna: What the World Needs Now. And then one member of the troupe rises and sings a line, then another, then another, with eventually all of us gathering together and holding each others hands while singing the song facing the church members from front of the church, wrapping up the song and to bowing to surprised applause. It's something I will remember my entire life.

11/14/2003:
The Headshot
After shedding over fifty pounds since February of 2003, your Master Thespian's face had thinned down so much that I no longer looked exactly like my current headshot. Being the photo was also almost ten years old, I decided to arrange for a new one. Since this is a beginning actor's web site, I thought some of my reader's would be interested in how one goes about obtaining a proper headshot. I've always used Richard at Petrillo Studio's for my own and my daughter's headshots. Although, once an agent deigns to handle me, I understand that she may require I use her favorite photographer. Sniff, sniff. My first step was to set up an appointment. One week ahead of time, I set an appointment with my hair stylist for a few hours before my scheduled photo shoot. That way I'd have my hair perfect for the shot. I also took my current eight by ten glossy to show Mr. Duran how I looked last time. I had a break between the cut & color and the shot, so I stopped by my favorite Eggery on 44th Street and Camelback Road, and had a rare waitress-served breakfast. Sadly, the snowbird-burdened service sucked. I had scheduled plenty of time to drive to the studio and arrived early, which is always much better than late. Next, my sole preparation error raised its ugly head. Instead of picking out shirts that would compliment the photo (because I did not know which shirts would compliment the photo) last night I had carefully chosen my favorite shirts, my newest shirts and my prettiest shirts, which I then carefully ironed. I included a solid black shirt that I had bought for a showcase performance that featured a flap that concealed all the buttons. Actually, while wearing that particular shirt and a white silver-button snap preacher's collar, I could marry people or render last rights on the dying. In my car, I also had the maroon polo shirt I always kept hangered so that I didn't have to saunter into the biker bar I frequent, still wearing my security guard uniform complete with the gold Sergeant's badge above my left breast. Not a good idea. Out of the seven shirts I brought, he chose the only solid colored shirt, the black one, and then asked if I had any more one color shirts. I ran out to the car and fetched the biker-bar polo shirt. Mr. Petrillo explained that any shirt or blouse that isn't a solid color, involuntarily draws the viewer's eyes away from your face, which is not a good thing. He had me squat with my legs beneath me on the seat part of a chair that was positioned in the open doorway so he could use the late morning sunlight, which is always far superior to man-made lighting. And while snapping, snapping, snapping, he uttered all the happy horse-dropping things, that as the model, make you feel so special. Probably twenty minutes later, after throwing in a few (awful) happy, (awful) quizzical, (awful) angry looks, we were done. He fed the camera's smart-card into his computer and I saw 32 proofs pop up, one after the other, filling in the empty blocks on the virtual contact sheets on his 23 inch flat-screen monitor like a Bingo player x-ing off her squares. Since I'm so incredibly handsome <grin>, he made a few minor corrections and within an hour of having arrived, I was leaving with my contact sheets. (Most important: whether you like it or not, your headshot should reflect what you normally look like. How you look at work, at school or out shopping. Ladies, this is not a 'Glamour Shot' or heavy make-up bar-hopping situation. When you are called to an audition, they love to look up from the headshot on their desk and see the same face smiling at them. They get quite peeved when your face does not look like your headshot.) Next, I phoned the wonderful Alan Tongret, one of my acting coach's and some time director, and asked him if he'd help me pick out the proper photo for my new full-sized headshot. Once I sat down with Alan, he gave me very specific reasons why he favored only three. I then phoned Petrillo Studios and while Richard looked at my contact sheets, we narrowed it down to one shot. He mailed me the 'chosen-one' on a CD. I phoned SuperShots® in Los Angeles, California at 323 724-4809 (no website) and asked Lydia for an order form. Two days later, the SuperShots® form arrived. I saw I could order 200 8 ½ x 11 black and white headshots, that, including shipping came to a mere $95. So I filled out the form that included choices of fonts, color of the printing and many other options and mailed my order in. The whole headshot procedure, including the stylist ran about $305.

10/30/2003:
Short Run of "Grease"
Master Thespian managed to sneak out last night to see "Grease" being performed at Mesa Community College's "Theatre Outback." It was my first visit to the "MCC Theatre Outback". After a calming trek three quarters of a mile across campus (see map below) I was pleasantly surprised to discover that the physical plant was much better managed than my many unanswered telephone calls might have indicated. The theater's armed and maroon upholstered chairs, slanted at a somewhat steep angle, number less then ten score with all of them providing a good sight line to the stage. If any of my seat-mates were watching me, why I don't know, they'd have seen tears streaming down my face as I thought of the many times I'd seen the movie version of "Grease" with my wife who, on Valentine's Day last, reported that she no longer wants to be my wife. It's a good sign that I didn't have time to count the seats, because I was too busy being entertained by the thirty-five member cast and chorus. Jon McHatton as "Danny" was very good with his dancing, singing and acting. Plus, to me anyway, he looked like a dead ringer for the young detective sidekick of Alan Arkin in the movie Gattaca. I felt that the blonde and beautiful Sabrina Farnsworth, as "Sandy", started out strong, but her performance seemed to fade as the minutes rocketed by. Dylan S. Baysa, as "Kenickie", also did a very good job. For the brief moment she was center stage, Marie Belfiglio, as "Cha-Cha" gave it everything she had displaying great attitude, eye rattling head-snaps and an outstanding set of gams (defn. shapely legs) - 'scuse me while I wipe my lips - hey, I'm a man, can't help it. Naturally I also fell in love with the bad-girl poured-into-her-pedal-pushers "Rizzo" who was perfectly portrayed by the lovely Heidi Starks. The "Teen Angel" scene, showered with bouquets of "ooo's" and "ah's" from the audience, which featured Tyler Maxson, was really cute, with everyone up on the old-fashioned four wheeled roller skates and the ladies sporting night cream and massive Dolly Parton sized teaser-scraping hair-curlers. For a community theater production, with dozens of volunteer, non-union dancers, the choreography was excellent. Having never witnessed the stage performance before, I don't know how much choreographer's Ms. Bodine and Jackson borrowed or how much was original, but it was all pretty darn good. And, being involved in theater myself (most often, when other actors quit with no notice) it had to be a massive endeavor to get so many thespian's in step. I cannot give any higher praise of a performance I've seen once, other than saying that I want to see it again. I almost forgot, seeing the cuter than hell, miniature, drive-able, 1950s primer-gray automobile, is worth the price of admission alone. It's so odd that it reminded me of my own 1950 flat-head powered, gray Desoto that I bought for $100 and terrorized North Central Avenue during the late '60s. If I failed to credit someone, I apologize as I was unable to scribble notes in the black and was often spreading my attention among the ten to twelve actor's on stage at any one time. As I have stated before in my columns, I write to help my fellow actor's, not to hurt them and if I caused hurt here I apologize. The show run continues at 7:30PM from October 30th through a 2PM and 7:30PM performance on November 1st, 2003. The box office number is 480 461-7170. Take the 101 to the Southern exit and head east. The campus is on the south side of Southern and I suggest driving to the far east side of the campus, to Longmore Street and taking it south to the South Parking Lot where the "Outback Theatre" is located. View a MCC campus map here: Map of Mesa Community College campus.

10/07/2003:
"Agents Worldwide are Coming to Phoenix"
Announces the E-mail I received this dreary and drizzly desert dawn. However, this electronic advert came with an addendum stating ". . . use common sense and discretion". Of course, anyone involved in the acting end of the entertainment business knows that legitimate agents very rarely need to travel the country in search of new talent. That is because legitimate agents attract "talent" like Ben and J-Lo attract paparazzi. At least this notice was a bit more honest than most, because they add: ". . . there is a fee to participate in the event that covers preparation and/or pictures." A fee that covers "preparation"? What is that about? And, of course, any even mildly serious actor already has more headshots than most of the Valley's 6,813 Realtor's have business cards. So the comment about "pictures" also concerns your Master Thespian. What is the primary clue that should lead any actress, actor or model to avoid a particular "agent", "talent search company" or "casting agency"? It is the fact that they earn significant income from sources other than getting their clients, ie., their talent, paying gigs in commercial work, television, movies or the theater. My humble suggestion? Stay away. If you must spend your hard earned clams, enroll in an acting or art appreciation class at: Scottsdale or Paradise Valley Community Colleges or at the Herberger Theater Center. Here is a link to the Better Business Bureau where they discuss agencies: BBB.

9/25/2003:
Black and White
I don't even know how old my current headshot is. I think it could date back to 1993. Because of that fact, this coming Saturday, I'm visiting my favorite photographer, the Sphinx-like Richard Petrillo to shoot a roll of film and see if he can coax at least one "look" of me where I don't resemble Boris Karloff suffering from chronic constipation. When I first got into acting and was handing out my resumé and headshot at every audition, I was mildly surprised when directors, producers, casting people and agents alike would remark, "You look exactly like your headshot." I was surprised that is, until I witnessed some of my fellow thespian's, mainly of the female persuasion, eight by ten glossies that reflected little evidence of reality. Not too long ago, your Master Thespian, weighing in at nearly three hundred pounds, met with Danny Goldman, during a Universal City, California, actor's workshop, and he told me I looked identical to my headshot, even though a few short months later, Gay Gilbert told me I needed a more up to date headshot. It's all so subjective. And so personal. Due to my strict adherence to the Atkins' Diet, and possibly some of the incredible stress caused by my marital changes and challenges (don't phone me yet, Morgan Fairchild-keep my number, but don't phone) I've managed to drop sixty five pounds of flab since the winter of 2002. How sweet is it to be able, at age 52, to wear the same size pants as your muscled-up seventeen year old son? However, as we all know, there is one huge drawback to losing major poundage. The drawback is that your face, sans the extra fat that was pulling tight wrinkles and filling in the creases, begins to display its true age. To somewhat counter my new cut countenance, I've decided to finally have my graying and disappearing mane professionally colored. My new younger look should produce some interesting results, both in my acting careerr and in my everyday life where I meet hundreds of new individuals every month.

9/05/2003:
Classes for Actors:
For those of you Arizona actor's who subscribe to Laura Durant's e-mail bulletin, this will be old news. If you live in Arizona and you are a serious actor you need to subscribe. Gay Gilbert, Arizona Producer/Casting Director and Bruce Nelson, Certified Chekhov Acting Coach are teaching an "Actor's Intensive Film Workshop" at Theater Works Sunday, September 14th, 2003. I'm not familiar with Mr. Nelson or the Michael Chekov Acting Technique, but Gay Gilbert is one of the most warm, uplifting, encouraging, and truthful acting coach/casting director you will ever be blessed to meet. The 9AM to 5PM class requires a headshot, resumé and a $65 payment in advance.

9/01/2003:
Solaris
Being a big, big fan of science fiction novels, your Master Thespian, ignoring multiple awful reviews, finally rented "Solaris". This is the movie that I believe was financed in a major part by its star, George Clooney. I must admit though, in order to comprehend the movie, I'll need to purchase and read the book. As an actor, I immediately understood what attracted Mr. Clooney to this screenplay. It requires actors to actually act without special effects dominating the screen. Sadly, in several scenes, Mr. Clooney's nonverbal acting skills were lacking, leaving me to wonder exactly what his character, Dr. Chris Kelvin, was feeling. Of course, the two shots of Clooney's hairy butt really got me excited. Not. Hollywood still believes that naked people having intercourse (I first typed: "intersex") is a visual representation of committed love. Of course anyone who has experienced love soon realizes that sexual intercourse is a very small component of that wild and wonderful emotion. Natascha McElhone, as Rheya, is an unusual beauty, but the multiple flashbacks of her smiling like a $130 million Powerball Lottery winner, kept drawing me out of the movie. Jeremy Davies put in an incredible performance. He convincingly came across as a totally spaced-out individual. I also borrowed from Blockbuster, one of my favorite science fiction movies, 1997s "Gattaca". I am so fond of this flic I will soon be adding the DVD to my video library. Anyone who has seen this movie and doubts that we are not on the path towards this screenplay traveling from science fiction to everyday life, has not received a photo-radar speeding ticket recently. Both Ethan Hawke and Jude Law were very good in this production. And Uma Thurman . . . every time I see "Gattaca" and her again, she becomes more sexy and more alluring. Strange. Non-actor, but spectacular writer, the massive Gore Vidal performance in this movie clearly demonstrates the difference between professional actors and a mere untrained celebrity in front of the camera. I noticed several times Mr. Vidal reacting before the line was said and walking away before he should. While, Ernest Borgnine's, performance was not at all convincing. It was almost as if he was walking around in a flu and Nyquil induced haze. All I can figure is that maybe he was gravely ill during the filming of this project. He has since passed away. If you have not read Gore Vidal's "Messiah", a novel about millions of people blindly following a spiritual leader, I highly recommend it. I own two copies myself. One a first printing hardback I purchased at a public library used book sale, the other a new 'anniversary' paperback. And while Mr. Vidal, I believe, penned the book as an indictment of Christianity, it instead, actually strengthened my own faith.

8/23/2003:
The Green Room
A new service of Durant Communications reveals that my ex-good buddy Jason Barth was cast as Hawkeye Pearce in the play MASH. Jason epitomizes what I was writing about in my column of July 28th where I wrote about Cary Grant. No, it's not that Jason looks anything like Cary Grant (sorry bud) but that his acting is so smooth as to be fairly undifferentiated from his normal behaviour. And the director's must like his acting too, because he keeps getting consistently cast. I didn't realize that the movie M.A.S.H. came from a novel, but I did know there was a play M.A.S.H. because I bought the playbook at a Phoenix Library used book sale last year.

I see where Jared Sakren, founder of Shakespeare Sedona and Artistic Director of Southwest Shakespeare Company, is conducting a six week acting workshop titled: "Exploration of Character through the Use of Masks". Now, if you're like me, back when I was ignorant of the use of masks, you may be thinking, "What a weird deal. Masks. Right, just what I need." But the knowledge of masks in acting is just as essential as blocking and memorization. One of the many things I learned in my "mask" acting class was that (especially for someone like your Master Thespian who, rightly or wrongly, becomes so very seriously involved with his character) that removing your make-up prior to leaving the dressing room is vital. It is the same thing as taking off a mask. Unless you're attempting to foil Big Brother's photo radar, you wouldn't wear a mask while you're driving down the street would you? Neither should you leave the theater wearing your stage makeup. If you haven't had exposure to masks you should consider signing up for Professor Sakren's six week class.