Heero: How many more times do I have to kill that girl and her puppy...?
Diane: in response to this particular movie quote, i think heeros lost it. he's a loony bird!! I mean, come on. anyone who hallucinates that badly ( and frequently ) severely needs HELP. H-E-L-P. thats not the kind of help your doctor can give you either, so im reccomending heero yuy to ichiban saiyan, for a little bit of understanding and straitening out.
Ichiban: so heero where ya from?
Heero: ( quietly like a stupid kindergardener ) ja-
Ichiban: SHUTUP!!!! YOU STUPID LOONEY!! I DONT WANT YOUR F!@#ING DISEASE GOT THAT?!?
Heero: yes.....
Ichiban: Yes what? ( leans in on heero with arms crossed and foot tapping )
Heero: ( nervously ) ......mam...?
Ichiban: ( steps back and gives a heavy sigh ) heero, heero, heero.......i guess nobody told you........
Heero: hm?
Ichiban: ( roaring loud enough to knock over sofa apon which heero formerly sat ) DONT YOU EVER MAM ME!!!! AND, ( points insanely at heero ) WHEN SPEAKING TO MEEEEEEEEE, ( jabs finger back at her ) YOU MUST AAAALLLWWAYYS SAY YYYYYYEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!! your majesty.
heero: (rolls eyes) yes your majesty.....
Ichiban: and courtsy
heero: ( rather embarrased, courtsies ) ......
Ichiban: ...do that again.
Heero: no!!
Ichiban: oh please?
Heero: ( frustrated ) will you just get on with the damn treatment?!!?
Ichiban: oh?? of course!! now. ( suddenly zips behind heero and begins walking him to another room ) the first step to clearing you of these....eh..... " problems " .... we will be talking to a person with rather similiar defects. ( opens door to revieal.....)
Heero: oh no.....
Lady Masaki: SASAMI!!!!!!!!! ( lunges at heero and nearly strangles him ) SASAMI SASAMI SASAMI!!!!!!!!!! ( crying her eyes out while swinging heero back and forth in a deathgrip\hug )
Ichiban: Heero, meet lady masaki, a woman who frequently mistakes total strangers to be her daughter!
Heero: ( with eyes bugging out of skull ) c-c-ant......breathe.....!!!!! OOF!!!
Lady Masaki: ( shoves Heero out in front of her, though still gripping his shoulders hard enough to leave white marks ) SASAMI!!!!! OH, SASAMI!!!! ITS BEEN SO LONG....IT FEELS LIKE YEARS SINCE I LAST SAW MY LITTLE GIRL!!!!!
Heero: ( becoming hysterical ) LITTLE GIRL?!?!?!?!?
Lady Misaki: ( nodding enthusiastically ) YES, OH SASAMI!!!!!!!!( starts bawling again ) WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR HAIR!!! IT WAS SO LONG AND SOFT ( is at the moment yanking on heero's hair ) AND IT WAS BLUE!!!! JUST LIKE YOUR MOMMYS!!!!!!
Heero: MOMMY?!?!? BLUE?!?!?
Lady Misaki: AND YOUVE GROWN UP SO TALL!!!!! I COULD REMEMBER BEING ABLE TO PICK YOU UP AND SWING YOU THROUGH THE AIR WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER LAST!!!!
Heero: ( in fear ) oh please no......Ichiban!!! call this madwoman of---YURK!!!!! ( lady masaki jerks heero up in the air, causing the alarmed yurk noise )
Lady Masaki: ( dissapointed ) oh well, i guess you havent grown THAT much, WHICH IS ALL THE BETTER!!!! NOW WE CAN SPEND MORE TIME TOGETHER!!! ( releases heero and grabs him back in a deathgrip )
Heero: THIS IS MADNESS!!!!!
Ichiban: Now your getting the picture!
Heero: OK OK!!!! I GOT IT I GOT IT!!! NOW PLEEEAAAAAAAAKKKK!!!!! ( lady Masaki's grip is getting tighter.......)
Ichiban: ( smiling ) sure thing!! Lady Masaki, this is not your daughter.
Lady Masaki: ( dumbstruck look on face for a split second ) hm?? ( eyes narrow at heero )
Heero: um ...... ehheeh......hello.
Ichiban: in fact, this kid is a BOY.
Lady Masaki: ( changes deathgrip to a stranglin'-facepullin'-eyestretchin'-very-painful-looking hold on heero's face ) are you TRYING TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME, YOUNG MAN?!!?!?
Iciban: 3......
Lady Misaki: I DEMAND AN ANSWER!!!!
Ichiban: 2......
Heero: mommy!!!!
Ichiban: 1.....
Lady Masaki: ( slams heero into wall beside them, clenching her fists ) HUMPH!!!! ( turns around and walks away )
Ichiban: ( peeling heero off the wall ) bingo~~~! wow, and you survived too!
Heero: my names mud~~~~!
Ichiban: eh......oh. maybe we should try the more subtle treatment.
Heero: one that wont knock my head in.....
Ichiban: ARE YOU QUESTIONING MY AUTHORITY?!?!?!?!?
Heero: no.......
Ichiban: no.......WHAT....??
Heero: ( sighing ) no your majesty......( courtsies yet again )
Written by Kazi Sandassuno
