Mood:
celebratoryNow Playing: I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - 'U2'
At 10:39 am today I got the most wonderful text message from my sister. It said, "Hey auntie kk!" (KK has been my nickname from, like, birth.)
Now, I'm the oldest sibling. I have a 24 year old sister and a 20 year old brother. At first, I went, "Auntie? I don't have a niece or nephew..." Then I remembered a conversation my sister and I had right before Thanksgiving, about how she and her husband were thinking of starting a family. In a fit of hope, I left my patients (this was in the middle of shift change, where patients are coming off and being put on), called my sister and had her confirm that--YES!--she was pregnant!!
I started bawling my eyes out in the middle of the nurse's station, and I didn't give a fuck who saw me. I then announced to my patients and staff that I was going to be an aunt! Several times. I don't know how far along my sister is and all that jazz. We couldn't talk long and I couldn't hear her over my bawling anyway. She can't be more than six weeks though, by my guess.
God. I've been waiting four years for those words. Four--fucking--years. And now that I've heard them, it feels like it's been no time at all. Shit. I'm getting tears all over my keyboard.
God. How do you mothers do it? I feel like life is starting anew, and I'm not the one with a life inside of me! I feel so joyous and refreshed. Christ, I'm already in love with this child. I don't know the sex or the name or when he or she will be born, but I will defend them with my life. How can you love someone you've yet to meet? It doesn't sound possible, but that's exactly how I feel.
Lord, I'm about to explode with happiness! I'd never thought I'd feel like such a hippie! It's wonderful! Life is wonderful!
It feels good to fall in love with life again.