Carrot ran through a bush maze to find himself facing a group of playing cars with Haz Knight helmets on. “We’re painting the roses red,’ they sang, “painting the roses red!”
“Painting the roses red,” continued one of them.
“Well pardon me, but Three-San, why do you pain them red?” sang Carrot.
“Huh?” chorused the Haz Cards. “Oh!”
“Well, you see,” explained one of the playing cards, “we accidentally planted white roses, and Her Majesty *hates* white roses.”
“Oh, then lemme help!” said Carrot. “Painting the roses red... Not pink, not green, not aquamarine..”
A trumpet sounded, and the Haz Knights freaked out. A procession of Haz Cards came through the maze. Following them was a huge woman with purple hair and a large red-and-black gown on. On her head, she wore a tiny gold crown. Following her was a tiny, winged woman in a matching mini-dress, another tiny crown on her head.
“Guards!” shouted the woman, who was at least four times Carrot’s size.
Chocolate ran down the aisle, blowing a trumpet. She stopped, and panted out her introduction. “Her Majesty, the Queen Mamma.” Shouts of adoration sprang up from the crowd.
The small girl tapped the rabbit on the shoulder, clearing her throat. “And Dota,” added the bunny. One person cheered.
The huge woman spotted one of the rose pushed dripping with red paint. “What have you four been doing!” she shouted at the splayed-out cards.
“Uh...uh...” tried one of the Knights.
“Who’s been painting my roses red?!? Who’s been painting my roses red!!! For painting my roses red, someone will lose his head.” She spotted the Haz Cards. “YOU!” she screamed at them, her eyes looking evil. “Off with your heads!!!”
Several other Haz Cards ran over to their condemned friends and carried them towards the jail.
“HEY!” shouted Carrot, standing up. “They were just t-trying to help out.”
“Who are you?” the Queen bellowed.
Dota flew over and said, “Why that, that’s Carrot Glace!”
“Yeah!” said Carrot, glad that someone recognized him.
“Well,” bellowed Queen Mamma, “stand still, improve your posture, clasp your hands, turn out your toes, and STOP FIDGETING! Now bow! And smile! And always say, Yes, Your Majesty.”
“Yeeeees Your Majesty!”
“Do you play croquet?” asked Big Mamma.
“Uh, no...”
“Then let the game begin!”
The gargantuan Queen grabbed Carrot by the arm and dragged him towards the croquet field. Haz Cards flew out onto the field and formed to croquet field. Dota dumped two hedgehog balls onto the field. Queen Mamma picked out on of the noisy flamingos that were flying around, straightened it out, and proceeded to hit the first shot with it. Huge cheers went through the crowd as the ball shot through every hoop, and Big Mamma skipped to the other side of the course to wait for Carrot to take his turn.
Grimacing, Carrot followed the Queen’s example, choosing an obnoxious pink flamingo that would not straighten out, and ended up sending him into an embarrassing somersault.
As the Queen swayed over to her next move, a pink-and-purple-striped tail appeared on the small of her back.
“How are you getting along?” asked Zaha.
“Not at all,” murmured Carrot grumpily.
“Whassat? Can’t hear ya.”
“I said, *not at all*,” repeated Carrot.
Big Mamma wheeled around. “*Who* *are* you talking to?”
“The Zaha Cat!” cried Carrot, pointing behind Big Mamma where Zaha’s head was floating.
“Zaha! Where?” shouted Big Mamma.
“There!”
“If I get angry, child, you - lose - your - head, do you understand!?” shouted the temperamental giant.
“Yes Your Majesty,” whimpered Carrot.
“You know,” said Zaha, reappearing as Queen Mamma swayed off, “we could make her really angry.”
“Oh, no! Dammit, please don’t Zaha!”
Zaha Cat tucked Queen Mamma’s croquet bird under the hem of her gown, and when she swung, she tripped herself and sent herself flying into a somersault. She landed with a thud, due to her size.
“Oh, my whip and Gestapo hat!” cried Chocolate from the sidelines.
“Mamma!’ screeched Dota.
“You head will roll for this Carrot!”
“Couldn’t she have a trail!” protested Dota quickly, eyeing Carrot.
“Um, OK, only a little one, though.”
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