Why Sailor Moon Sucks

First I would like to say that I've seen the fansub and there is NO DIFFERENCE! Stickin' in different words cannot cause repetitive, unoriginal plotlines, downright stupid bad guys, and stereotypical characters.

Here are the reasons why I HATE Sailor Moon, along with some point-out-the-stupid-parts entries;

1. Sailor Moon is repetitive: Every episode follows the same pattern, over and over and around again.
   Here's how it goes: The bad guys will have a new plan to collect energy, or pure hearts, or whatever's all the rage of the season, and Sailor Moon will have to stop them. Because if she doesn't they'll destroy the world (oh, how original). She must also save their innocent victims. Because, of course, everything the baddies do requires some body part or something. To add to the repetitiveness, when they are trying to fight the bad guy, in almost each episode (of Sailormoon S anyhow, that's what I've seen most recently) the battle goes like this: Sailor Moon tries to fight by herself, but can't do it; the other scouts join her (yay for teamwork!) and they still can't do it; Tuxedo Mask appears. That's my next reason...

2. Tuxedo Mask: Continued from above: It's the heat of the battle! The Sailor Scouts seem about to lose... but SUDDENLY, TUXEDO MASK appears! He throws an amazing rose which seems to stun the enemy by it's very presence (oh my goodness! I've been almost HIT by a ROSE!); suddenly Sailor Moon is able to attack and beats the enemy in one hit. Don't ask me why she is suddenly able to do a really strong attack when Tuxedo Mask comes. That's another stupid thing.

   And don't even get me started on the "Moonlight Knight" phase...

3. Darien the Pedophile: I didn't realise this before, but Darien is, how old? College age you say? And Serena... grade eight or nine isn't it? However, they are going out, kissing and supplying the show with corny romance.
   And since I've gotten so many e-mails mentioning this, I KNOW Darien isn't *literally* a pedophile. That's an *exaggeration*, a commonly used rhetorical device. Some people, somehow, can't see that...

4. It's Annoying: Shoujo-concentrate. Giggly dizzy girls obsessing over boys they see. Whining about tiny things like homework. Eating in proportions no human could possibly keep down, because it's supposed to be "cute." 'Nuff said.

5. Transformation Scenes: Okay, Sailor Moon is transforming, her clothes are flying off, etc. Meanwhile, the enemy just stands there and watch as Sailor Moon aquires these powers and such. They could easily attack during her transformation, they'd knock her out cold in a minute... Why don't they? Another unsolved mystery...

6. Theme Song: "Fighting evil by the moonlight, winning lo-ove by the daylight..." Just that one line should be enough to cause someone to turn of the telly... "Never running from a real fight..." Well, not a real fight. If it's a real fight, she just attempts to run until Luna stops her. Poor poor Luna, stuck babysitting this girl...
   And the Japanese song is even dumber! I mean, they aren't even talking about the show, it's just a buncha words... "Sorry I'm not honest with myself, but I can say everything in my dreams..." Those are the first couple lines. Yeah, that's nice... be honest... Whatever.

7. Un-Originality: Classic good-guys vs. bad-guys plotline, and a villain-of-the-day episode format. With transformation scenes. (Even Dirty Pair Flash uses those!) There are a zillion animes, and cartoons, and novels, and everything which are like this. I can't see why Sailor Moon is any more interesting than Power Rangers and it's like.

8. Attack: Okay, being aliens and all (I'm mostly reffering to the earlier Queen Beryl stuff, but this aplies everywhere), the baddies chose to prey on people in the exact same city that they Sailor Scouts live in, every single time, when they could easily attack somewhere else. Even the next city and the Scouts wouldn't be able to stop them... So why do they always attack the only city where they could possibly be stopped? Only God knows...

9. Lack of Depth: It's the usual Bad & Good affair. Some people are bad, like Queen Beryl or whatever, and some people are good, like Serena & Co. Evil people are ugly with pointed features, while good people are pretty and pleasant-looking.

10. Too Much Depth: On the other hand, somewhere is a huge big deep story I still haven't grasped. There's lots of stuff going one in the background, evil people collecting things for some purpose I really don't know. In fact, I really have no idea what they're doing. Not that it actually matters, considering the Villain- & Victim-of-the-day plot, which requires no background knowledge.

11. Humour: Their attempted "humour" consists of people going crazy over nothing and making really stupid facial expressions while moving quickly and yelling. Funny.

12. Stereotypes: Ever character with a personality (ie not people like Molly) is a stereotype. Serena herself is the silly & stupid, but giggly girl, irresponsible and whiny but cute (supposed to be cute...). Rei is the more serious one who makes fun of the main character. Melvin is the geek. Amy is the smart one who spends her time in the library. Lita is the tough tomboy. And so on and so forth; NONE of the characters are really original. And did I mention Darien, the "pretty-boy?"

13. Look, it's Sailor Moon! Where's Serena? Here's a scene taken directly from an episode (of Sailor Moon, duh!). Molly is being held captive. Sailor Moon comes to her rescue. Molly stares at Sailor Moon, in awe, saying things like "wow, it's Sailor Moon!" Now, Molly is Serena's friend. Serena does not wear a mask as Sailor Moon. How come Molly, or anyone else, doesn't recognise her just because she changed her clothes? Umm...

14. Fan-Following: "I dedicate my life to Sailor Moon!" Does this sound familiar? People who can truly say this are called otakus (in the true meaning of the word). Obsessed. Very obsessed. I know that isn't a reason to hate the show in itself... But some people are just so obsessive you have to hate them (and whatever it is that they're obsessed over) for it!

15. Skimpy Battle-Suits: They transform to prepare for battle. Do they get armor? Head protection? Knee pads even? No, they get rather skimpy sailor-suits which all look just like Serena's school uniform. If I was the one who created those mystical suits they get into, I would at least give them armour or something, some protection...
    And "needing to be able to move freely while fighting" would be an excuse if for skimpy costumes if, say, they actually moved while fighting. But in Sailor Moon, "fighting" consists mainly of standing in one spot and shooting attacks...

16. Stupid Villains: Many of my previous reasons have to do with how stupid the villains are, so I might as well sum it up here. If I were the leader of the bad guys, I would be able to beat the crap outta Sailor Moon & Co. Here's why (Yes, some of these are listed above in other sections):
    • I would get my cohorts to attack Sailor Moon during her transformation scenes.
    • I would send energy-collecting, pure-heart collecting, toad-collecting, etc. people to the towns and areas that the Sailor Scouts do not haunt, not right to the center of their territory!
    • It takes all the Sailor Scouts to beat one of my monsters. I'd send a whole bunch of monsters at one to wipe them all out at once. Darien too. Get rid of Darien and the Sailor Scouts are pretty much nonfunctional...
    • I would send enemies to sneak into the homes of the Sailor Scouts at night and set off a poison gas bomb or something. Seeing as they look exactly the name when they're not transformed, and they'd transform and transform back right in front of anyone who's watching, it would be a cinch to track down their homes.
    • Or I could just attack them as they walk to school, or anywhere really.

Amen. I hate Sailor Moon.