Piccolo joins...the Sailor Scouts!

By Pixie

NOBODY tell Piccolo or he will kick my ass! ^_^ Also things might be a little screwed up cause I havn't watched Sailor Moon in a long time! And I didn't get to see many episodes before they cancelled it, thanks to YTV, grrrr! Anyways this is a really bad story, read at your own risk!

Piccolo looked around, searching for somebody new to train. He was at the temple Rei's grandfather owned.

"Hmmmmm, I can sense some fairly high ki levels here. Might be worth a look," he said to himself. A black cat and a white cat walked up to him.

"Do you think he's from the Negaverse?" the black one whispered to the white one. Piccolo's sensitive Namek hearing picked it up.

"From the Nega-what?" he asked glaring down at the two felines.

"Holy crap he heard us! And he doesn't think it's wierd that we talk!" the white one said. Piccolo arched an eyebrow ridge (Piccolo doesn't have actual eyebrows, so by that I meant the place where they would normally be!) at them.

"Why should I? Where I come from they got dogs running the police force and foxes commanding the navy," he said. The two cat's exchanged long looks.

"Are you sure he isn't from the Negaverse?" the black one repeated. Piccolo sighed.

"No I am not from the Negaverse, whatever the hell that is! Now does anybody around here have special abilities? And if they do, take me to them!" Piccolo snapped. The cats jumped.

"Okay, okay. By the way I'm Artemis and this is Luna," the white one said. Piccolo nodded in acknowledgement and followed them into the temple. They went down a hall and stopped in front of a door.

"They're all in there, Serena is the one with the long blonde pig tails," Luna said. Piccolo nodded again and pushed open the door. Lounging around in the room were five girls. As Luna had said there was one with long blonde pigtails, one with short dark hair, one with long dark hair, one with long blonde hair, and one with brown hair in a ponytail. They all stared at him for a moment. Then the one with the pigtails started screeching.

"NEGATRASH! In the name of the moon I will punish you!" she yelled jumping to her feet.

"I'm not from the damned Negaverse! And in the name of my hearing your going to shut up and stop screaming like that right now," Piccolo growled. Serena clamped her mouth shut and dropped to the ground.

"Well who are you then?" the one with short dark hair asked.

"My name is Piccolo," he said crossing his arms across his chest as usual. The one with brown hair spoke up.

"He's cute! He kind of reminds me of my old boyfriend Freddy," she said getting all dreamy eyed. Everybody sweatdropped.

"Uh Lita? Your old boyfriend had green skin and pointy ears?" Serena asked. Lita shook her head.

"No but, he, uh, I don't know! I just really want a boyfriend!" she said. Piccolo cleared his throat.

"Look I'm not here to pick up girls," he said.

"Then why are you here?" Mina asked.

"I've come to show you guys how to really fight," he told them.

Lita got all dreamy eyed again.

"Your going to be a Sailor Scout? WOW!" she said. Piccolo wasn't quite what a Sailor Scout was but he decided to go along with it.

"Uh yeah...that's it," he said slowly.

"Well okay, let's get you a costume!" Rei said jumping to her feet. She opened a closet and began rummaging through it.

"What planet are you from?" Amy asked.

"Namek, and why do I need a costume? What's wrong with what I have on?" Piccolo said frowning down at his gi and cape.

"Do you have any little brothers or sisters?" Rei asked, ignoring the question and still going through the closet.

"No. Just Dende I guess, since all Nameks are descended from the same one," he shrugged.

"Cool! Go get him!" they all squealed. Piccolo sighed and did so. He returned shortly with Dende who was rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"Piccolo? What the...? I thought I was taking a nap on Kami's lookout, how did I get here?" Dende asked looking around and blinking at the girls.

"Ooohhh! He's soooo cute!" the scouts all crowded around him cooing. Dende looked kind of freaked out. Lucky for him Piccolo managed to yank him away from them.

"Um, he's claustrophobic, you shouldn't crowd him like that," Piccolo said. They all backed off, Dende sighed with relief.

"Okay here are your magic pens, just raise them in the air and shout Namek Power! to transform. Dende you shout Chibi Namek Power!" Amy insructed them.

"Okay uh...wanna try it?" Piccolo looked to Dende.

"I guess," Dende sighed. They both raised their pens in the air.

"NAMEK POWER!"

"CHIBI NAMEK POWER!"

They both went through the whole transformation sequence. When it was over Piccolo looked down at himself.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME? I'M WEARING A FRICKING DRESS! UNDO IT! UNDO IT!" he roared. Both he and Dende were wairing the Sailor Scout uniforms with short little skirts and knee high boots.

"Hmmmm, I never realized what great legs I have," Dende said twirling around.

"What? You said you wanted to be a Sailor Scout, stop yelling!" Rei said, she was miffed cause she picked out the outfits.

"I said I wanted to help you! I did NOT say I wanted to be a cross-dresser!" Piccolo growled.

"Fine, but you need some sort of a costume!" Serena said, "Hey why not get him Darien's old Moonlight Knight costume? He doesn't need it anymore. Plus you seem to like the whole Arabian look." They brought it out. Piccolo sighed.

"Well it's better than the dress," he said, "What about Dende?"

"Oh I don't mind Piccolo," he said looking up. Piccolo eyed him warily.

"Your not turning into Freeza on me are you?" he asked. Dende looked stricken.

"Eesh! Of course not! Er, on second thought get me something else too," he said, his cheeks turning a little red. Rei went back into the closet grumbling to herself. She emerged with a few outfits small enough for Dende.

"Okay looks like all we got are old Halloween costumes. There's a pumpkin, a pirate, a ghost, and a teddy bear," she said holding them up. Dende studied them thoughtfully for a moment. "I'll take the pumpkin," he said. After they got the costumes cleared up they went for a walk.

"Where are you going? Aren't we going to train?" Piccolo asked.

"No we don't train. We just wait for a bad guy to show up," Mina answered. Piccolo followed them, dumbfounded. They all headed into the park.

"Hey Serena, are those aliens your with?" Melvin said popping out of nowhere, and for some reason not finding this wierd.

"Yup," she said puffing up proudly.

"Hey guys look! It looks like a monster!" Amy said pointing. Up ahead was what appeared to be a woman made out of bread.

"SUCK BAGELS!" she laughed insanely and hucked them at people. Piccolo sweatdropped.

"We're fighting a giant loaf of bread?" he asked unenthusiastically.

"There's no time to lose! Transform everyone!" Serena cried, "MOON CRYSTAL POWER!"

"MERCURY POWER!"

"MARS POWER!"

"JUPITER POWER!"

"VENUS POWER!"

"This is so stupid...Namek Power."

CHIBI NAMEK POWER!

They all transformed and lined up, the five sailor scouts, an Arabian, and a big pumpkin.

"HEY YOU! DIDN'T ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU NOT TO PLAY WITH FOOD!" Serena yelled at the bread woman. She turned and started whipping bagels at them instead.

"Ah! Attack guys!" Lita shouted.

"Moon tiara, go!"

"Mars fireball, ignite!"

"Mercury bubbles, blast!"

"Jupiter thunderbolt, crash!"

"Venus crescent beam, smash!"

"Namek...aw forget it!" Piccolo shot a ki blast at her.

"I'm just a healer! I can't attack!" Dende pouted. Miraculously the bread woman dodged all of their attacks. Serena got hit in the head with a bagel. "OWWWW! They're stale!" she exclaimed rubbing her head.

"This is the dumbest and most bizarre fight I've ever been in," Piccolo muttered.

"Damn our attacks won't work! Now what do we do?" they all began to sob. Then a rose came flying through the air and stuck into the ground in front of the bread woman.

"TUXEDO MASK! Yay, we're saved!" they all started jumping for joy. He dropped to the ground beside the rose, then picked it up and handed it to Serena who fainted.

"Who the hell is flower boy?" Piccolo demanded.

"It's Tuxedo Mask, he saves our asses in almost every episode!" Lita said, her eyes shining again.

"Screw this," Piccolo said, "MAKANKOSAPPO!" With that he blew up the bread woman and Tuxedo Mask. Then he turned and stalked away.

"Hey wait up Piccolo! Where are you going?" Dende asked trotting behind him.

"These guys are to wierd to train. Let's go get some Margarita's," Piccolo said. Then they walked off into the sunset.

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