Things All Guys Should Know About Girls


-Don't even bother with "No,no, you look even better, chubby."
           
-We know that you're lacking "down there" when you have to pump up 
           the bass in your car. 
          
 -Everytime we get mad doesn't mean that we have P.M.S. Girls have 
           real problems too, you know.
           
-Don't make fun of our soap operas because we know that you secretly 
           enjoy them!
           
-Shopping is too an art form! 
           
-Don't complain when we take a long time to get ready, we have a lot 
           more to shave than you boys do.
           
-Guys who wear wife-beaters, reek of cologne and drive a suped-up 
           1986 tempos, are NOT cool. 
           
- Don't be mistaken, when you're girlfriend says it's o.k., when you 
           ignore her during Don Cherry's little speels, she really just wants 
           to crank up her Spice Girls C.D., so you can't hear Don anymore.
           
-When a girl calls you for the first time, don't tell her you'll
           phone her back after the game on t.v.is done. It's not very appealing.
           
-Guys who cheat? Two words- DIRTY JERKS
           
-Don't make fun of bald men, you're only having a glimpse into your 
           own future.
           
-We're not stupid, we know that you read a lot more than just the 
           articles in Play Boy.
           
-Birthdays,Valentine's Day and Anniversaries ARE quests to see if you 
           can find the perfect gifts.
           
-Don't ask us what's wrong if you don't want to hear about our period 
           cramps, Party of Five problems or the latest cat fight.
           
-Pleated stainwahed jeans ARE NOT IN!
           
-Try as you might, but my Dad will always be smarter than you.
           
-Get used to our mother's. They always give the best advice and don't 
           worry they won't tell our dads what you and I do.
           
-You try sitting on the toilet in the middle of the night, only to 
           find the toilet seat wasn't put down the last time it was used...or 
           flushed
           
-Don't worry when chicks go to the bathroom in groups, we're only 
           talking about how manly you are.
           
-If you don't act like soap opera guys, don't expect us to dress like 
           Victoria Secrets girls.-"No I will not do what that girl did in that 
           porno!"
           
-When you're lost, it's sooo sexy when you ask for directions.
           
-Cosider shopping a vacation from you, sometimes the credit card 
           gives us a bigger thrill than you do.
           
-Talking about how big your organ is, probably means it's that much 
           smaller.
           
-Plain and simple, CALL WHEN YOU SAY YOU WILL!
           
-"You're lovehandles are cute" That is coded for "Time to work out"
           
-Giving us a back rub doesn't mean we want to do it from behind!
           
-Let us hug and kiss you without getting hounded to "DO IT"
           
-"Accidently" grinding with that big breast implanted blonde on the 
           dance floor is NO mistake.- In no way is back hair sexy.
           
- Finally, when a girl says "Do I look fat?" Always, always, say no.

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