Ariel: That you had stolen.
Once you had silver,
Cory: And once people were smart enough not to put poems at the beginnings of chapters.
Then came the rains
Ariel: I'm melting! Melting!
out of the blue.
Cory: Are they saying Bob had a child?
Ariel: *giggling* Ewwww
Ever and always.
Always and ever.
Time gave both darkness and dreams to you.
Ariel: Darkness and dreams, part of a good breakfast.
Once You Had Gold - Enya
Ariel: Well, at least it was credited.
Cory: True.
***** All of Mainframe was dark.
Ariel: That seems to be the theme of all the settings in this story.
Cory: (Binome) I can't see! Someone help me!
A small portal opened up at the edge of the city.
Cory: And out of that portal fell JELLY BEANS!
Ariel: Give it up.
A figure stepped out. The portal closed
Both: *look at each other* Shhhtk!
behind Morgan la Fey without a sound.
Cory:(Morgan) *crunch* Oops.
I’m going to have to figure out how the Guild does that so...
Ariel: stupidly.
efficiently. Silent is the way I like to arrive.
Cory: As opposed to loud and noisy.
Ariel: The way every assasin out to kill a highly trained guardian wishes to arrive.
Fortunately for me, the portal is undetectable by scans.
Ariel: *laughing* Is that really how people think?
Cory: (thinking person) Fortunatley for me, this razor is designed not to cut me...good thing since I'm shaving my neck. Oh, SHIT!
A slight breeze made Morgan’s long, black trench-coat flutter.
Ariel: *blink*
Cory: It cannot be!
Several stray hairs blew in front of her eyes. She idly brushed them behind her ears, out of force of habit.
Ariel: (Morgan, thinking) Must resist...habit...
Under her long coat, Morgan wore black leather pants tucked into black combat boots and a black tank top.
Cory: *trembles*
The only jewelry she wore was a tear shaped pendant that matched her eyes; Morgan had been told that the necklace had belonged to her mother.
Morgan wasn’t a bad looking for an 17-hour-old sprite.
Both: NOOOOOOOO!
Ariel: A self-insertion!
Cory: Not another one!
In fact, she was quite attractive.
Cory:*bitterly* Like she could be anything else.
Her body was constructed of curving shapes, well-proportioned, in fact, but she was also lean and well built, without looking too muscled.
Ariel: *wondering* Is that possible?
Cory: No, but don't tell Lady Sita that.
Her hair was like a purple waterfall,
Cory: Problem, is there such thing as a purple waterfall?
Ariel: *shrug*
which she usually kept pulled back in a neat braid, though several wisps of hair escaped here and there.
Cory: Which totally breaks the point of 'neat', now doesn't it?
Her skin was a deep red, the color of User blood.
Ariel: I'm so glad that the narrator knows this, even if all the characters in the story don't.
The eyes were almond-shaped;
Cory: *disgusted* Oh, please!
they were the color of the ocean when one stares into depths so far down one can’t see the bottom.
Ariel: So, blue.
Cory: Pretty much, yeah.
They tended to change different shades and intensities of blue to match her moods.
Cory: Why didn't you tell me this was a Mary Sue story?
Ariel: I didn't realize it, I only skimmed and I missed a bunch of the story.
Cory: Including the inevitable big fight in the end where she's gonna kick major bitmap.
Ariel: *nods saddly*
She had been trained by the Guild to use a multitude of weapons,
Cory: Including magic which will cure all the guardians...
Ariel: Wrong fic, Cory. That's Jo Ann, this is Lady Sita. Give her a little credit.
and could use almost any object as an instrument of pain;
Ariel: Including starring in fanfic?
although Morgan overly preferred the rapier. Her training in the martial arts was vast; the Masters had often praised her on her fighting abilities.
Ariel: I'm feeling sick.
She also carried ten throwing knives on a belt around her waist and a dagger hidden her boot.
Cory: There's also plot holes hidden in several of her pockets that lead straight to Hell.
Ariel: Or any Jo Ann story.
Cory: I thought we were leaving Jo out of this.
Ariel: Its just that, well, I wanted to MiST her next User Guardian one, but A_Einome has dibs.
Cory: MiST it anyway, not like you listen to anything like that anyway...
The dead of night. This was the time when dark creatures stalked the dreams of the sleepers.
*Twilight zone music keys up*
Ariel: Spooky...
The mercenary’s favorite part of the cycle.
Cory: Oh, look, we don't get a lengthy explanation on the time.
Perfect time to arrive unnoticed. Morgan glanced around her new surroundings.
Cory: (Morgan, thinking) How the fuck did I end up in a whore house?
Too bad I won’t be staying long. This place looks interesting. And... familiar? I wonder why...
Ariel: Because you have some stupid, traumatizing history nobody wants to hear about.
The sprite pulled off her coat and she narrowed her brows in concentration.
Cory: *laughing* Do you know what that reminds me of?
Ariel: What?
Cory: ReBoot III Ate My Balls.
Ariel: *laughing* Oh yeah!
Morgan began to compress the coat between her hands until it disappeared,
Ariel: *grimly* Just like magic.
stowed online in her private storage, ready to be downloaded back again any time she needed.
Cory: Or anytime she needed to resemble a cast member from the Matrix.
After removing her boots, they too vanished in the same fashion. She seemed to do it with ease, with a sense of well-known practice.
Ariel: How old is she again?
Cory: 1.7 or 17 in User years.
Ariel: Lady Sita needs to die...
When she was done, Morgan uttered only two words aloud, a command that seemed to have the cadence of a spell: "Conversion:
Cory: Slut."
Gargoyle."
Cory: Damnit, why can't anything cool happen?
There was a sound of stretching leather and the woman seemed to grow... bigger.
Ariel: *eyes widen, blinks*
Cory: *laughing maddly*
This format will be most...
Cory: crappy.useful here. She flexed her claws and whipped her tail back and forth.
Ariel: (Morgan) You are getting sleepy...very sleepy.
Cory: *snore*
I must find a place to hide out while I gather information for a plan,
Cory: (Morgan) Plan A: Distract readers until they have no idea what the fuck is happening. Fall in love with main cast member, turn good. Plan B: If that doesn't work, shoot Bob and collect cash.
Morgan thought to her self as she flapped her leathery wings and launched herself up into the midnight sky.
Ariel: I'm gonna retch.
Floating Point Park was silent,
Ariel: Cue Bob and Dot date...
except for the chirping of insects and the gentle sigh of the sprites’ breathing.
Cory: *rude snickering*
Ariel: Not one word.
They stared up into the night sky, the woman laying in the man’s arms.
Cory:(Dot) Oh, Bob!
Ariel: (Man) Ummm...who's Bob?
Dot turned to look up at her husband.
Cory: Phong!
Ariel: I hope Hanako kills you.
"Bob, what if something happens while I’m gone?
Ariel:(Dot) What if someone for once characterized me like I actually was in the story instead some winy, overprotective slut?
What if Kyle needs me?
Cory: Umm did we miss something?
What if -"
Ariel: Mouse was a vampire?
Cory: That was actually a good story.
The Guardian put a finger up
Cory: Lookee, Bob's in traffic!
to the Command.Com’s mouth, stopping her in mid-sentence. "Dot, you need a break!
Cory: *snap* (Bob) Not litterally!
You’ve barely had a nano to yourself all week!"
Ariel: Ahem!
Cory: Well, there the consistant time schedule goes...right out the window.
Bob’s voice softened. "And I’ve barely gotten any time with you."
Cory: (Bob) I want nookie, damnit!
Ariel: *shudder* Don't say that in your Bob voice.
"I’m sorry, Bob. It’s just that I’ve had to do so much lately..."
Ariel: Poor Dot, she's always mischaracterized.
Cory: Next she'll be agonizing over a stain.
"I understand," he replied. He pulled her closer and kissed her cheek. "Let’s just lie here for awhile."
Cory: *snore*
Dot smiled in agreement and snuggled her head against Bob’s chest.
Ariel: Unfortunatley, she left her body back at the diner.
He leaned his head on hers. They closed their eyes. Moments of sweet, comforting silence
Ariel: *pokes the silence*
Cory: (silence) Hey! Stop that.
followed.
Suddenly, Dot heard a gasp
Cory: (Bob) Dot, you do know we're in public?
from the Guardian as she felt him lift his head back up.
Ariel: (Dot) Umm, Bob, shouldn't that be attached to your neck?
She looked up at him. "What it is, Bob?"
Cory: (Bob) My head, but that's not important.
"Something just...
Cory: (Bob) licked me.
flew overhead."
Ariel: *dryly* Two guesses on who that is.
Dot yawned. "Huh? I don’t see anything."
Cory: Bob had just been 'screwing her blind'.
Ariel: Ladies and gentlemen, the Guardian Lust joke.
Bob turned around. "Wait!" He pointed up into the sky. "There it is!"
Ariel: (Bob) There's a cloud and there's a cloud and...THERE'S A FUCKING CLOUD!
Cory: (Dot) Umm, Bob, did you take your medicine earlier?
She shifted her gaze to where Bob was pointing
Cory: Woah.
and her violet eyes widened as she put her hand to her mouth. "Oh my User! What is that?"
Cory: *rude laughter*
They watched until the thing disappeared from view.
Cory: (Dot, gasping) Oh...BOB! Oh my User! Just like-
Ariel: *laughing, stops suddenly and coughs* You're going to Hell.
"I don’t know what that was," Bob said. "But it looked like it had wings."
Both: *laughter*
Morgan looked about her temporary home.
Cory: (Morgan) I am not staying at this fucking whorehouse for the last time!
Ahhhh, this place will do nicely.
Cory: For what?
Ariel: Please, Cory, shut up while I still have a mind to preserve.
It was an abandoned structure near the conveniently near the Principal Office, tall enough for flying.
Cory: Is there such a place?
Ariel: Sh! I'm reading.
Squinting her eyes, she brought her hands together and pulled a pillow out of her storage directory followed by a blanket.
Cory: Next she pulled out a bed, bathroom and entire living room set.
Might as well get some sleep before the next cycle starts.
Ariel: Her time schedule is confusing me.
Morgan laid down and tried to get comfortable on the cold concrete.
Cory: I thought she had a blanket?
She soon drifted into deep sleep.
Morgan opened her eyes.
Cory: (Morgan) JELLY BEANS!
Ariel: I'm going to kill you.
She saw that she was standing on top of the Principal Office,
Cory: How the fuck did she end up there?
which provided a very good view of
Ariel: Bob's ass.
Cory: Uh-huh!
Mainframe.
"Morgan!"
Cory: Drop your pants!
She turned and saw the blue-skinned sprite standing next to her.
Ariel: Bob.
Bob.
He took her by her shoulders and looked into her deep blue eyes.
Cory: WE GOT THE POINT, SITA, THERE BLUE. THERE FUCKING BLUE! WE GET IT!
Ariel: Calm down...
She stared back into his brown pupils.
Ariel: Aren't his pupils black and his irises brown?
Cory: *breathing deeply in and anger*
He’s even better looking up close.
Cory: Please don't tell me this is Malay all over again.
"You must remember!"
Ariel: (Bob) The turkey! The turkey is still in the oven!
Morgan’s eyes became sky-blue
*Cory lunges for the monitor in anger only to be stopped by Ariel.*
Ariel: Take deep breaths...
with confusion she scrunched her forehead in confusion. "What? What are you talking about?"
Ariel: She's just trying to get her point across, you understand.
Cory:*deep breaths*
Why is the sprite I’m supposed to kill talking to me?
Ariel: Because otherwise this wouldn't be a dream sequence.
Bob pointed toward a sector off in the distance. Suddenly the two of them were standing in the middle of the sector.
Cory: Okay, I'm getting a headache.
Morgan looked around once more.
Cory:...
Ariel: No more jelly bean jokes, Cory. No.
This sector was much unlike the others: in the center of it stood a massive tower, dark and foreboding.
Cory: The Silicon Tor.
Ariel: *hopefully* Is Meggy gonna be in this one?
He gestured around him with the sweep of a hand. "You must remember what happened here!"
Cory: Mind being a bit more specific there Bob?
Bob stared intensely into her blue eyes.
Cory: *taking deep breaths, searching for her pills*
"You have to know where you come from!
Ariel: (Bob) When two people love each other very much, something special happens...
You’ve been here before!"
Cory: Oh no! Angsty backstory.
Now Morgan was horribly perplexed.
Ariel: (Morgan) How special?
What is he talking about?! This is my first time to Mainframe! Where did this this dark tower come from? I don’t remember seeing it...
Cory: (Morgan, thinking) How stupid can I get?
"You must remember who you are!"
Ariel: (Morgan, looking at her ID) Why does this say Morgan el Poota? And why does it say I'm a whore?
Cory: Isn't poota a feminine noun?
Ariel: Maybe, why?
Cory: Wouldn't that make it Morgan La Poota?
Ariel: And you wondered why I almost failed my Spanish I test.
Bob disappeared and Morgan was surrounded by hundreds of viral binomes, each pointing a gun at her.
Ariel: (desperatley) Kill her, Meggy, please kill her!
Evil laughing began to fill the air,
Ariel: *sighs like a lovesick idiot*
seeming to come from all directions at once. It grew louder until the laughing became overpowering, hurting Morgan.
Ariel: *maniac laughter* Die, bitch, DIE!
Cory: *blinking*
She clutched at her ears in vain. "Make it
Cory: suck.
stop!!," she screamed in agony.
Ariel: *laughing*
Cory: Shh! This is a sad part in the story.
Ariel:...*snickers*
The roar abruptly ended. In the silence that followed, Morgan realized that she had recognized the voice, that distinct laugh.
Ariel: *sighing* So did I.
He’s the one who hired me! But if I never heard him laugh, how did I recognize his voice?
Cory: (Morgan, thinking) Duh! I'm a self-insert. I know everthing!
Morgan woke up with a start. What the Web was that?! Why was Bob in my dream!? And who was laughing at me?
Ariel:*confused* I thought she just knew.
Cory: Don't argue with the author avatar.
She flopped back down and sighed heavily. I need to get more sleep.
Ariel: Okay, we need to take a break.
Cory: *searching through her purse* Oh, where is my shrink's number?
Ariel: On to Chapter Two! ...After Cory speeks with her shrink.