Hey ya'll, this would be the Words of Wisdom page, where each week, I will place the week's before Wisdom. Just remember. If you can't learn from your own mistakes, at least learn from everybody else. Stay true to yourself and don't fuck up.
July 13, 2002
A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family - but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raises his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
June 30, 2002
Hey baby... im not wearing ANY underwear.
June 22, 2002
"If it looks good, you'll see it;
If it sounds good, you'll hear it;
If its marketed right, you'll buy it;
but...if its real, you'll feel it."
May 18, 2002
"You can do anything that you want, so long as you follow these three simple rules. 1) Don't do drugs, drugs are bad. 2) Party in the house if you want, just don't trash it. I hate cleaning up, and so do you. 3) This rule is the most important. If you want booze, fine. But remember, the last beer in the fridge is mine!!!"
-words from a father that is few and far between
May 11, 2002
Part two fo Worlds Worst Pickup Lines, now here.
11) Wanna Play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long.
12) Excuse me, do you have your phone number? I've seem to have lost mine.
13) I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
14) If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, can I visit you between the Holidays?
15) I love every bone in your body - especially mine.
16)You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
17) Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
18) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into that cheap motel room.
19) The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.