Any email sent to The Flying Porqupine is fair game to be posted here, along with any comments, additions, mocking or editorializing deemed appropriate by Olivia. Just so ya'll know.
From: Sarah Davies
Date: Wed, 23 Jun 1999
Subject: your site...
... is cool. But then, I am an English Lit graduate who is also a quotations, Sting, Jonathan Creek, Elizabeth Peters and Lindsey Davis aficionado, so I'm probably biased.I like people with this kind of bias ;)
I enjoyed your paper on Biblical references in Sting's work ... truly original.Why thank you. Flattery will get you everywhere.
I would have to disagree with you there, MF is some of his best work, IMO, but you don't want to get me started on this old "which album is best" argument. Trust me.
Wow, that's a huge question. I think many of them are self-evident, and as this topic strikes me as intensely interesting, this may be a possible topic for some sort of "sequel" paper if I get some spare time in the near future.
Something along the lines of "the Eastern Philosophy influences in the music of Sting." Hmmmm. I'll have to think about it. Thanks for a good idea!
This one goes in my "how stupid can people be?" file. Would Val Kilmer have the words "unofficial fan site" displayed prominently on his webpage? Would he have an email address like Strawberrylocks? Would Val be really really excited to be in a movie with someone with such a limited vocabulary? Sigh. Ridiculous.To: Val
Hey, whats up my NIGGA! The reason I'm writing this e-mail is because I would like to make some movies with you.(VAL) Or just be in one so I can start my career in acting. People like me, most of the time, because I like to make them laugh. I guess I have a natural talent for the big screen. You get it my Nigga. Cool. Anyways, if you could hook it up with a tryout, I won't let you down!
not bad looking at all
puerto-rican and italian and uh uh black, my nigga
Martial Artist since i was a little kid
Raised in the childrens shelter and foster homes
just turned 20 in March.
workout 5 days a week to keep lookin' yoked
Anyways if you're interested please call or write me at the following address:
Please don't leave me hangin bro. I need the info., and someone to connect with...you da man. Alright then Peace Out My Nigga. Thanks.
I understand the following words:
Val, Puerto-Rican, Italian, black, email, funny, man, March. That is all.
the important question is: is "val" is gonna write him back?> Would Val Kilmer have the words "unofficial fan site" displayed prominently on his webpage? Would he have an email address like Strawberrylocks? Would Val be really really excited to be in a movie with someone with such a limited vocabulary?
But of course! (Please note the misspellings. That's my favorite part)
So, I was like totally totally stoked to get your email. I'd totally love to do a movie with someone as naturally talented as you. Totally. Yo.
So, if you could come for an audition that would be totally cool. How about April 1, 2000. I should be starting filming on my next movie then, and you could totally have a part.
No, I got a totally good idea, my Nigga! Maybe you could be the lead and I could be your TOTALLY AWESOME sidekick. Because your such a natural on the big screen, you know? Awesome. You da man.
So, like totally let me know!
Whst do u mean not even Val Kilmer could have saved Batman & Robin?!?!?!?! It was MUCH better than Batman Forever ( which just so happens to be the Batman movie that Val Kilmer was in)! But i think Batman Forever could have been better... but only if George Clooney had done it!Sigh. With a character who's only line was to repeat the previous line over and over again? Really? Well, there's no accounting for taste.Does Val Kilmer have an E-mail address? If so, please, PLEASE, tell me what it is!!!! If he doesn't have 1, please tell me his real home address. thanx again.Wait. Let me get this right. You say you'd rather have George than Val as Batman, and then you want his address? Hummmm.
we just saw a whole bunch of your movies and we wanted to let you know.....we thing you are soooooo great and you are also soooooo cute!!!! thanks to my nana i love you in all your movies and so does she! we wanted to let you know that and we would both like to hear from you and get signed pics. (if it's possible)
thanks again, keep up the good work!
love, ashley and nana (nancy)
Thanks! Wow, I didn't even know I had BEEN in movies!
Q: what is nicole kidman's greatest acting triumph?
A: acting as if her husband is straight
Hey, I didn't say it! Godfrey did!
I think it is because Val is in it and you don't want him to die, like me.yyyeeesssssss . . . ?
wow, I think you have one of the coolest home pages I have ever seen.So you're new to the net, are you?Great job. Do you do this for a living?If you mean, do I spend an obscene amount of time doing this, the answer is yes. If you mean, do I get paid to do this, the answer is sort-of. To see the pages I DO get paid to create, check out the WSU Performing Arts Dept, (still VERY much under construction).
I like your switch the star game. As for George Clooney, I can't stand the man...Val would have been much better in his place every time! Including ER. Actually, that would be kind of funny. I can just hear Val saying "Give me 200 cc's of ditryethene, STAT!!"
Congratulations on your Elizabeth Peters website - very useful and informative. I also enjoyed your obsessions page. I too am fond of Dune and Jonathan Creek!It's heartening to know there are still a FEW people out there with good taste :)
Hi there, I've got a friend that is totally obsessed with Val and I was looking for a page that listed all of Val's movies for her but can't seem to find any. Do you know where I could find one, or do you happen to know all the movies that he's been in~?www.vkn.com is a great resource for a list of his movies, pics, and up-to-the-minute information. I don't even pretend to know that much about Val, more's the pity.
This document may not be duplicated, transmitted, stored, genetically manipulated, spindled, folded, mutilated, crushed, cracked, stapled, punched, bound, photocopied, autopsied, tenderized, ignited, lunched, launched, lurched, flocculated, fluctuated, fornicated, arched, axed, actuated, confabulated, congratulated, hyprinfundibulated, pressed, hydrogenized, pasteurized, homogenized, carburetted, liberalized, disinfected, disenfranchised, disembowelled, disinformed, disinterred, displayed, disfigured, distrusted, shredded, diced, pureed, masticated, archived, buffed, rebuffed, refrigerated, retrieved, reformed, rebuked, returned, retreaded, sawn, shingled, lobotomized, appendicized, amputated, articulated, artheroscoped or sent by special messenger to a small poorly-lit restaurant in an unnamed village in the south of Albania where it might be recycled into political statements about the lack of comfortable leisure seating without the written permission of Clay Collins.Good heavens! Was there ever a clearer indicator of a lawyer-in-the-making?
Hi. I looked at your Switch the star page. It was great. It is nice to see that I am not the only one doing that. Except I don't have a web page I just bore my husband to death with my Val Kilmer antics. I think insted of Billy Zane as Cal in Titanic. Val Kilmer could have done a not so bad job in that role. Thanks!
Actually, he was really the only part of that movie that I liked. But trust me, you DON'T want to get me started about Titanic.
Wow what a page. I'm just starting out. You have a real flare for web design. Fun fonts and exciting pictures... you even hold to a point most of the time. I have finals and stuff to do, Ill look over it more intently during the break. Maybe I'll get a personal tour of it from you, after the 26th I'll have lots of free time.
What a leading question . . .A leading question without a reply.
Well I think the conclusion of The Ghost and the Darkness was kind of weird too, but I guess it had it had to end somewhere. And the second lion just had to die, the thing that kind of suprised me was that when Michael Douglas' character died, I never expected that. I mean they just killed the first lion, and then I thought that they would find a way to kill the second one. But I liked that cuz it suprised me. I think it would have been cool though if then the first lion like came back again, like they thought they killed it but it didn't die. I thought that this movie was very well done, and it was so convincing, I think that Val Kilmer is a very good actor also.Like, totally.
Help!! We in the USA need Part TWO programs of the JONATHAN CREEK show. How can we put pressure on PBS, the producers, or BBC to get the newer shows?Send email to PBS from their website, and send an email to your personal PBS station requesting it! If you want, I'd be willing to make video copies of the ones I have for tape trades or $$ for shipping or whatnot. Let me know.
I visited "The Flying Porqupine" web site.
Very interesting."Interesting." Is this like when a four year old gives her mom a lime green tye dyed Placemat Set for Christmas? And the kindly mother says "Oh, honey, they're so . . . er . . . unique!"I think the drawing on the main page is "very interesting" because, I can't draw a straight line. I LOVE IT!!, OK?
Okay, okay. Sorry, the FP just tends to get a little defensive.you are SOOO cultured, I admire you for that. I just don't make the DAMN time for things like that..
I'm glad I've managed to convey that impression, whatever the truth may be . . .
ok! i don't know what to say! flying porqupines?
With an Email address like funcowpats, you're asking about a flying porqupine? Hmmmmm. . .
well let me know whats going on in your head.
I assure you, if I knew, you'd be the first to know. Or the second. Er . . . whatever.
From: Daniel Henderson
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1998
Subject: wart removal
Hello. Just checking out your home page. Nice. That Val Kilmer game is a blast, I'm telling you.
You're . . . mocking me, aren't you. Anyway, the picture of Dad with his crazy hair needs to be bigger.
Oh, I guess the picture isn't too small. I didn't know you could click on the pictures and make them get big. Groovy. Neat. Howdy.
Howdy! Welcome to the Internet! Enjoy your stay.
I hope that you guts (woops, supposed to be "guys", oh well) get your Trainwreck 423 group going (Isn't that what you're called?)
Close enough. That's actually a better name, now that you mention it.
From: Deb McWhirter
Date: Wed, 4 Nov 1998
I totally agree that this movie was disturbing in a weird, scary kind of a way, and like you I can't figure out why! So if you come up with a good explanation, please e-mail me at (deleted).
P.S. I think that Val Kilmer is a wicked actor and deserves more recognition.
I'm doing my best!!!
From: Vicki and Derek Winter
Date: Tue, 3 Nov 1998
Subject: Love your Web site
Found your web site while looking for info on Jonathan Creek and love it. Plenty to explore there!
I also watched Excess Baggage on your "recommendation" and found it brilliant entertainment. I watched it twice and am sure I will be wanting to see it again. So many hilarious scenes.
One step closer to WORLD DOMINATION! Mwaa Haa Haa Haa Haa!
From: Kayle Ward
Date: Sun, 01 Nov 1998
Subject: i love your webpage!!!
hi there!!! it seems that me and you have something in comin!! very much like you, i think val kilmer is very attractive and has alot of talent.
he is far more attractive than leonardo dicaprio or matt damon AND he has ten times the talent.
Far be it from me to name names.the media should aknowledge him more, and they should put him in the spot light!!! well, i think your page is awesome!!! i think think its so cool that you saw the saint 14 times!!!! i myself havent done that, but i do own the movie and i watch it lots, my friends think im nuts because admire him, but i dont care!!! well, thats all i have to say.
Keep playing it. Sooner or later they'll get brainwashed, er, see the light.
Date: Sun, 01 Nov 1998
Subject: The Saint
I also loved THE SAINT. Saw it several thousand times. Thought she was a bit of a stretch as a Nuclear Physicist, but he certainly did the trick.
Apparently I'm the only one who liked her as a Nuclear Physicist. I think it's because I have a friend going into nuclear physics that reminds me of her. So it's not so much of a stretch for me.
FACTOID: Apparantly the original production called only for simple costumes (mustaches, hats) and no real characters. They say Kilmer made up all the characters and their accents himself to give the film some flavor. Amen.The story is that he just started playing around during filming with accents and such, and he and Shue started talking about what kind of man her character would fall for, and the director just gave him free reign--sort of let him re-write the script.
From: John Nieuwsma
Date: Sun, 01 Nov 1998
Subject: Hi from a Val Kilmer fan!
You're Val Kilmer page is really neat! I really think he has a lot of talent, also. I started liking him from The Saint, also. Now, I love almost all his movies! I just can't wait for November 20 when AT FIRST SIGHT comes out.
Thanx for making a great web site.
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1998
Subject: Re: Obsession Update
. . . Currently featuring my Val Kilmer pages, with links to a few of his movies and lots of pics.
xlnt taste! i can't tell u how many times i've tried to explain to people the difference between "stars" and "actors." tom cruise is my usual example. although he has turned in some decent performances, he's still just a star, who, when faced with an acting challenge he can't handle, tries to get out of it by flashing that stupid grin of his. val kilmer (whom a lot of my friends can't stand, for some reason) is nearly always excellent, and always worth watching even when he isn't. i have to say my favorite kilmer performance has to be tombstone. i have a copy of that video & watch it every few months or so. i'll be waiting for your tombstone page to come up.
trivia: apparently, tombstone's screenwriter originally turned in an excellent, historically scrupulous (uh-oh, there i go again) script. but it got messed with (obviously). (i read about the script change in a recent, masterful biography of wyatt earp.) i still like that film a lot, though. except it has that goofy kim delaney. and jason priestly. oh, well.