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LOVE the Exposition!  You know you want to!


In the Vortex

(Ear scorching curses rent the black purpley-ness of the void.)

Usopp: !@@#$%#$%^^&^&*%^#$%^@$#%#$%^ monkey balls!  We were expelled before the conclusion!

Nami: Of course.  I'm surprised how long we were there considering that Kuro was cast on the side of justice.

Ben: I think we were cast out because Usopp was going to get some.

Usopp: HEY!

Luffy: Maybe it was Sanji's fault.  Coz he's French and all.

(Sanji gives convincing proof that Luffy is wrong in his assumption that all things French are his fault, ie Sanji kicks Luffy in the face repeatedly.)

Vivi: I'm a bit confused.  Who was the young lady?  And why were there pirate midgets?

Chopper: And why was I one of them? I didn't understand that universe at all.

Sanji: What was there to understand?  (muttering) Dammit, we were thisclose to instituting a policy of 'Free Love.'

Shanks: Ah…the memories…reminds me of my college days.  Sorority girls, fraternity boys, community service and four years of uninterrupted intoxication (elbows Ben) Ain't that right.

Ben: Don't touch me, Shanks.

Shanks: Are you still mad?  It was
years ago.

Ben (grumbling): ...hazing...failing...yourfault...

Zoro: You know, I think I'm going to spend the rest of my time in this Vortex sleeping. (yawns) Because everyone talks about dumb stuff.

Luffy (sadly): I'm so hungry…

Vivi: I wonder why wasn't Kohza there.

(Everyone looks at Vivi, who has the decency to blush for speaking that thought out loud.)

Vivi: I just meant that
he's a rebel, we were rebels.  It would make sense, right?

Nami (patting Vivi on the shoulder): Think really hard about him.

Vivi: But I don't want him to show up! (with feeling) I
hate him.

(Sanji chuckles.  Zoro blanches. No one knows why.)

Nami (dryly): And I
hate money.

(The gang is sucked into another world!)

=====================

At Party's Bar…

(The indentured sorority girls are busy cleaning the soon to be renamed Party's Bar.  Makino walks through the swinging doors.)

Sorority Girls (in chorus): Makino-sama!

(Gone are the days of long skirts and serviceable t-shirts; this bar owner is decked out in a Vera Wang business suit that oozes money and power.  The kerchief is still there though and that kind of ruins the Executive Warrior Woman effect.  Most people are immediately struck with Makino's resemblance to an Amish woman on a power trip.)

(The indentured sorority girls flock around their queen bee.)

Makino (sighing and dropping her brief case): What a trying day.

Sorority Girl Salmon Pink: Iced drink, Makino-sama?

Sorority Girl Moss Green: Massage your temples, Makino-sama?

Sorority Girl Sepia: Makino-sama, you look vexed.

Sorority Girl Gray (removing double barreled shotgun from behind the bar): Shall we have someone eliminated for you, Makino-sama?

Makino (waving them away): I'll feel better in a moment.  After all (reaches into her briefcase) I got permission to renovate and expand!

(Makino beams proudly.  The indentured sorority girls clap and cheer - obediently.)

Makino: How goes the attempt to contact Customer Service?

(F.O.Z Girl sighs and hits speakerphone.)

Voice: If you need assistance with your transdimensional portal to world peopled only with idiot nerdy boys constantly being assaulted by beautiful yet ultimately brainless young women, press 54367.

Makino: Page me when you get to a real person.

F.O.Z. Girl: Can I go to the bathroom, Makino-sama?  I've been standing here for hours.

Makino: If you can get someone to take your place while you wait.

(The other sorority girls refuse to look at F.O.Z. Girl.)

F.O.Z. Girl (darkly): I will remember this, fellow sorority sisters.  I will remember it well and I will have my revenge upon you all...

=============
Random Quote Analysis:

"Like a camel I can go without a drink for seven days - and have on several horrible occasions." - Herb Caen

Nojiko: I think that one is for you, Four Eyes.
(Kohza clears his throat.)
Kohza: Camels don't need to drink so that leaves more for the rest of us.  Thank goodness as this is one long horrible occasion.
Nojiko: That made no sense.
Kohza: The Author doesn't deserve an analysis that makes sense.
Nojiko (sighs):  I'm so bored.  I'm even bored of PS2. I never thought I would say that.  (looks at Kohza)  Maybe it's because someone presents no challenge as an opponent.
Kohza: I'm sorry, but I didn't have a games system when I was a child.  I was too busy being used as a punching bag for royalty and then later as child labor by my father.
Nojiko: Child labor?  Me too!  My mother used me and Nami as field hands in the orange grove. 
(Kohza beams now that he and Nojiko have common ground.)
Nojiko: But I still managed to find time to be cool instead of a geek like yourself.
(Kohza is crestfallen.)
Nojiko: You're not even a cool gamer geek.  You're a boring book geek.
(Kohza's eyes water with manly, stoic tears.  Okay, not manly or stoic.  Kinda babyish in fact.)
Nojiko (ignoring Kohza's pain): You know what would be nice?  Karaoke. 
(Kohza's eyes stop watering.  They fill with dread and something akin to hateful loathing.)
Nojiko: I haven't gone out to karaoke in ages.
[Nojiko, you like karaoke!?]
Nojiko: I
love karaoke.
[Me tooooooo!!!!!  I love karaoke!]
Nojiko: No way!  You wanna karaoke?
[Do I ever!]
Kohza: God, no…

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Things Explained
Dang.  That purple red combo really makes my eyes bleed.  How about yours?
Plug #2: Midget pirate reference to
the video - download it.  Love it.  You know you want to.