Rising, Rising, Rising
That imaginary cliff you try to climb
Can you achieve to command its height
Will you be destined to go to the top
Can you achieve what so little have got
Rising, Rising, Rising
Look, you have made it, you are almost there
Can you achieve the mountains’ height
You have gotten higher, climbing that rock
Can you go further or will you simply stop
Rising, Rising, Rising
Look around, all you see are clouds and sky
Can you still tread where others have failed
You can make this trip, but will it prove
Can you make it and continue to move
Rising, Rising, Rising
Hey there watch that cliff, for it look content
Can you go farther though you are already there
You are here now yet you still climb that wall
Can you, to late, you are about to fall
Falling, Falling, Falling
Look down at the ground it approaches at great speed
Can you be saved to try once again
You are still falling because you went to far
Can you stop falling so incredibaly far
Falling, Falling, Falling
It seems the wind might blow you away
Can you reach out, your own life to save
You cannot do it because you are weak
Can you achieve what other still seek
Falling, Falling, Falling
The ineviatable is coming you have opened your fate
Can you still stop this before you reach the ground
You can stop if only you would use your mind
If you do not realize you control it all you will die
Falling, Falling, Falling
So the wind rushes all over your body now
Can you bare the coldness freezing your entire skin
You brought this on yourself as it is your own call
Now you have yourself to blame as you continue to fall
Strong emotions suposidly felt
warm embrace of suculant flesh
gone are orders of life
long are days lost
few shadows of carefully left feelings
all assume knowledge of this
yet forgotten are many
lost to the pages
Everyone walks to worlds not created
The self gone astray by fear
All hide themselves from blissful eyes
Shining truth doth never seen
You see only parts
All are jumbled
All hide in shells
Of self rendering bodies
Yet they pretend to walk where you tread
Hide in smoke the truth long sought
Ever ready to push back
The truth of their self-being
That object falling from the sky
Could it be a star?
Yet wishes made true here
Are very few and far
Yet when you think you catch it
And at first become estatic
Though when you finally look
You find its only made of plastic
Small delicate blades of grass
Easily blowing through boisterous winds
Large circular clouds stroll through
Coving the great land in desolate darkness
Suddenly letting go its valuables
The thin flowing rain drops of lost hopes
Which effect each blade of grass
To the core of its very vein
Roaming and violent crashes
Ravage the peaceful silent equinity
Of the once pure blue sky
A house is stripped from it very legs
And journeys onward toward the sky
The very earth cannot withstand
The very floods and fires brought to its land
Peaceful towns become the storms very bread
As it tears through every cornerstone
And leaves all with no place to live
Its force cannot be contained
Its fury uncommanded
A force of nature unstoppable to anyone
An impenetrable juggernaut
Which everyone must forget
The death
The destruction
The horror or mother earth’s untamed balance
As if to sometimes stop us
From continuing to build
A new house
A new town
With which to live
But she will not stop there
For more towns must be vanquished
Then others will feel
The loss of the same
The pain of homelessness
Yet no one can stop the cruel mother’s decision
And all must move on
Till the next great catastrophe
Black winds cover emptiness
Shallow souls are blanketed in darkness
Liars are immersed and never know fear
Darkness never shines with light
Earth is hollow
Space blank and empty
Corners of the world thickened with evil
Light never enters
Protected by the uncared
Stopped by the unloving and the pretenders
Never is light shown on the world
Covered in an everlasting thick fog
Which is death’s sea of darkness
I need a cure
I need a voice
I need a friend
I need a choice
So I wait
I cannot find love
I cannot find time
I cannot find hope
I cannot find rhyme
And so I wait
I look for anything
I look for difference
I look for revenge
I look for vindictiveness
Yet still I wait
I want what he has
I want his things
I want his life
I want what it brings
I continue to wait
Why is there no morals
Why is there no fate
Why is there no God
Why do I wait
Still I am waiting
I hate everything
I hate it all
I hate the world
I hate you most of all
What am I waiting for
I hope for salvation
I hope for death
I hope for hope
I hope for what’s left
I have gone
When the circles of solitude
Close in and force you alone
The very wind affects your every mood
Sometimes you feel like your heart is made of stone
You feel nothing at all
Then you realize, you have a friend that you can call.
Eternities of loneliness are hard to bear
Without someone with you, feelings are gone
You only hope that someone will care
You wonder what can hold you on
Then you know of that great girl
Who when you are down will help cure your world
Without the love in your soul
You lose emotions that darken your heart
Within your chest you feel a hole
Not feeling whole, but instead in parts
She brings you together and helps you with the pain
And she does it all, without any personal gain
Never ending cycles of this act
You hope one day this will all be the past
But even you cannot deny the facts
You are helpless here, lost among the stacks
Yet she is there to help you, she is so pure
And you do not even see that she is the cure
Enternity
Long waits
Forces of anger
The bitter resentment ongoing
Feeling reality’s harsh truth demeaning
Failing to stand the anguishing coldness
All the gifts could not restore me
I am lost forever in a whirlpools grasp
A dark hole with which I will never return
Dragged behind from sight for all to never see again
Seemingly little do I see before me
Never until it is to late
Victimized and frozen
In front of foolish beggars
I hate the stench of them
I beg the world to be rid of them
Lost are they but death do they deserve
Bastard children who never knew love
Stolen personas upon which they feed
Little remorse do they ever feel
To hurt you is their true goal
They stalk you for your very soul
You do not realize they have a part
The suck it dry until it becomes no more
Soon no self do you ever feel
Stagnate and soulless will I remain
Until like the rest they come with facades
To rip your world from its sugary mask
Again come more from all over and around
They can always find you
They will never stop
Pain will be your only friend
And all the others the source of it
Creeping into your life once more
Crawling through your skin
Touching every artery with its dark touch
They come once again
After what you can only call; yourself
Through locked gates of sorrow
You seek life’s end that is not to borrow
Warm day’s glow today, but you wish not to see tomorrow
You drown through all the rivers, ever weeping in your sorrow
The precious life you want cut short
This time of life you wish to inexplicably abort
Though if unsuccessful will take you to a high court
You wish your very existence on this plane of the world be short
Everlasting, colorful, and painful tears
The jolting and harassment by your peers
The horror of all that will happen; and what you fear
The dark idea that clouds your mind, you hope to make it clear
Stone brick walls
As are people’s souls that fall
Without meaning, no one will ever find it all
Seeking out that which can never be found, will run you up the wall
Dank and hollow halls
The echoing awful hounding calls
The swirling ground which drags you into its maw
The echoing palace of terror, upon which can only be Death’s hall
Blistery illusions
Which make you form your own conclusions
Show through with yellow, brown, and blue confusion
No bottom, top, left, or right; so you search for a solution
Dripping drops
Of unstable dew and ink blots
Swarm in your mind trying to connect the dots
Yet all minds with pressure and depression do drop
Decide the future of it
Answers few, yet playfully abundant
Wrapped around in the warmth of its mitt
Yet it will never come after, those that long seek it
A day of sadness
A day to die
People flee and people run
To live and hide
A day of terror
A day of death
All are grief-stricken
And try their best
To help any harmed
To look for life
Everyone hurts
And carries a strife
Looking for justice
Looking for war
Everybody wants
To settle the score
Can countries be blamed
Will we make them fall
Try not the hate
Do not easily fall
Buildings explode
Airplanes destroyed
People wondering why
We are the ploy
We need to unite
We need to come together
We must be strong
To come out the winner
Of a Pyric victory
Lives already lost
People have died
At a terrible cost
A day of horror
A day of mourning
We need hope
To keep us going
A day of catastrophe
A day of tragedy
We will prevail
To overcome this travesty.
Why is this pain resonating through my skull?
Precious brain cells; do fall
Walling to mine ear do they pierce
Strong and loud; incredibly fierce
Sounds are enough to make one mad
All these terrible, terrible; sounds that are bad
Turning over my mind and make me shriek
Forever they continue; to seek
To destroy my being and very consciousness
Yet somehow I live; fate or coincidence
Nothing can be done to force out the scream
Everything is tried; the voices do not heed
Oh loudness and terror I think in thought
Longing for some possible way; to stop
It from tearing the core of my very essence
And every second is felt; its presence
To drown out the long wreathing pain
My own life I reach out; slain
Today I will let the old boat stand
Where the sweep of the harbor tide comes in
To the pulse of a far, deep-steady sway.
And I will rest and dream and sit on the deck
Watching the world go by
And take my pay for many hard days gone I remember.
I will choose what clouds I like
In the great white fleets that wander the blue
As I lie on my back or loaf at the rail.
And I will listen as the veering winds kiss me and fold me
And put on my brow the touch of the world’s great will.
Daybreak will hear the heart of the boat beat,
Engine throb and piston play
In the quiver and leap at call of life.
To-morrow we move in the gaps and heights
On changing floors of unlevel seas
And no man shall stop us and no man follow
For ours is the quest of an unknown shore
And we are husky and lusty and shouting-gay.
Untitled
Today I let that ship stay harbored
Tide flows and shakes its mass
To movements of deep-steady rocking’s.
I lay awake and daydream on the bow
Passing the world by
And endowed with nothing for my tough days past remembrances.
I hope to choose the winds of my life
That flow through fluffy clouds of blue gentle sky
As I stare at all this movement from below on the deck.
I hear the passing currents wrap me in blankets of kindness and warmth
And pass on to me the touch that grants the strength of my character
Daylights shine off the rigging and show my heart
The sails throb and carry away
This vessel to the start of life’s call.
For weeks it will move up great peaks
Throughout changing winds of both wind and sea
Not one will stop me, none can foil or follow
Our journey is to venture to lands unknown
And we have become stronger and better and experience the day.
I do not believe
That there is anything wrong with me
I never venture outside, the safety of my home
Why should I go out into the world?
I feel so much better here all alone
I rarely exit through my rusty door
I do not understand all of your ways
People keep telling me, that I’m only going through a phase
Even as I step forth, to go and buy food at the grocery
I always feel this hunch, of some near uncertainty
I grab the cereal that to home I must bring
Yet I believe that Tony on the box, through his eyes it is me he sees
As green hat-ed leprechauns dance and sing
They pelt me with marshmallows, as they try to rob me
Guards drag me far away from the commotion
And I wait in a cell and hope for a solution
They all watch me from the across the bars
Even the police stare at me hard
As if they have eyes in the back of their head
Prisoners I know want to get me for reasons unknown
The world is against me; I wish I were at my homestead
If I stay with these criminals, to heaven my soul will have flown
I wait, and wait, and wait, aahh; it was just me stomping with my boot
I need to escape, be free, fly the coop
Suddenly I am free
I wonder who, it could be
It is my mom, and soon I heard her question
“I told them you had a breakdown, so don’t worry about an institution.”
She wonders what is wrong, with all of my brain sections
She tells me to watch out for myself in absolution
I merely scoff as she exits the door
It is not myself, but everyone else I must watch out for
I turn on the radio, hoping to relax my mind
But then what’s played, to me its not very kind
A tune of Men at Work – Who Can It Be Now
Makes me realize someone, is making my life hell
I turn that watchful station, but I hear what’s on now
Of course, could it be anything else, but the song by Rockwell
I know they’re in my radio; they try to drive me insane
So I pick up that radio, and beat it with my cane
Someone comes to my home
As if to spite me that they can come so close
They dropped something through the hole in my door
Could they be trying to hurt me, I would most likely think so
Just a few dozen letters, and nothing more
I still do not trust him, and toss them out the window
I’ll never figure out the identity of the blue uniformed man
Or why it was he came here, in his little van
I notice that it is dark outside and make me way to bed
As I try to sleep, I hear voices in my head.
Tossing, turning, to escape from these thoughts
I soon hear the voices of owls, crickets, and frogs
Now I think they are after me, why is it me they seek to sought
I jump out my window to escape and land in a huge mud bog
I am outside the safety of my hollow home
I try to get back in where I can try to be alone
I have not slept in days; I know that I cannot
For if I fall asleep, I know I will be caught.
I turn of the television but on it I see The Shinning
I turn it to the news but I think the anchors see me
I know it all sounds crazy, but soon I find myself hiding
To escape the looks of, the people on TV
Only when I notice them gone, do I come out
Now its time to make sure that nothing will hurt me now
I burn that TV with a match and so do I my bed and things
Watch out, what is that weird noise, which so currently rings?
Posters ripped for cameras, pictures looking for wires
I destroy everything that could have me watched
I tear my entire house to shreds as I see it catch on fire
I must get out or be consumed from the path that turns things hot
Outside I am alone, and my house burns down in flames
Now I know they have manipulated be and things will never be the same
I cannot get out of here, where am I stuck now?
I find myself in a room, but it looks more like a cell
Occasionally people give me food, and then they quickly leave
They help me use the bathroom, and even feel the need to clean
Though I cannot move my hands, somehow I feel more free
This huge, white, bulbous, square room will protect me
No way anyone can hurt me now and I can at last me alone
I am now happy and carefree, in my wonderful new home.
Hallucination does its part
Nourished on bitter hours
It grows incarnate in the heart
And breeds supernal flowers.
Kept warm in brooding’s thinnest silk
It grows in strength and hardihood
Within its veins the body’s milk
Corrupts the flesh and blood.
The vultures eat our eyes, a snake
Uncoils and sings
Of a large burning lake
That cools the sharpest stings.
Sinking we see the glittering spires
Of lost cathedrals, valleys wooing
The wind, fulfilled desires.
Hear the shadowy wood doves cooing.
On cottages built in the air
Where no man loves, where no man dwells
Unbodied voices hover there
In false hosannas and farewells
My Parallel
Futility
Victimized from all sides
Garnished on sweet souls
Wrapping through hearts vines
Breeding the dark heart.
It spreads through thin blood
Strengthened by possessive ghosts
The terrible lenguish
Destroys the mind, heart, and soul.
Circular swirls of dive-bombing apparitions
Snarl and scare
Entering the protection of burning flesh
Consuming the essence of life.
Our becoming is slowly withered away
From the fertile earth, the living world
Delicate forces haunt the brain
Causing the voices to scream
Through man made structures
Where feelings of steel rein the day
All voices silenced and never heard again
The idea of hope dies once more
The face of the overbearing taker of lives
Attacks me and carves his knife into my skin
I fall immediately to the ground
I lay awake and watch the cardinals circle overhead
I cannot stop the mugger from stealing my wallet
He leaves the street and vanishes
I stare at the suns piercing hot glow
It burns the inside of me
My blood spills onto the pavement
Flowing from my flesh to the metal grating
It swirls down the drain
I wonder what could happen next
My muscles are limp
I cannot move to save my life
The pain is ever reaching
Throughout the entire regions of my body
As the sun sets I realize no one will come
How did I get to this place?
All I wanted to do was walk along my path
Then an obstacle had to appear in my way
He struck with such impaling force
That I have not been able to recover
I lay tossed aside and wonder
I cannot see anything anymore
Are people passing me by?
Or am I in a place that no one ever passes?
The bleeding has stopped
I lye in a pool of my own drenching blood
That comforts me like a starving child
Who knows how long I have been here
All I know is that one day
Someone had walked where I once lay
And accidentally crushed my bones with their feet
Everyone tries to tell each other
This word that describes all of our feelings
Yet when this one word is really said
It is ever actually meant?
What can possibly define
The way you really feel inside
Not this word of course
Nothing possibly can
This word does not exist
Yet it is used everyday
It cannot ever be found
For no one will ever discovered it
No one can find the meaning
Of this very simple idea
So that is truthfully why
This feeling is a non existent word
There will never be an answer
Nothing will ever surface
This word that is so overused
Should never be spoken
Page 1: Welcome
Page 2: All About Me
Page 4: My Poems (21-40)
Page 5: My Friends Websites And Other Links
Page 6: College Pictures Year 1
Page 7: College Pictures Year 1 Con't
Page 8: College Pictures Year 2
Page 9: College Pictures Year 2 Con't
Page 12: Wizard Summer Pictures
