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The Ricer-Roni
(long-grain)
NOT YOUR AVERAGE San Francisco TREAT!!!

from rental to rice rocket!!


The first step to making the ultimate rice rocket is to aquire a $24.95/day rental!!!






I started with the weak ass 2001 Chevy Cavalier with 599 miles! Time to break this little biotch in the RIGHT way!






Now i know what you're thinking...OH MY GOD they put an LS1 in that Cavalier! But really if you look close you'll notice that it's the LS1's little (tiny) sister, the 2.2 inline 4-cylinder. Stepping on the go peddle in this beast resembles the sound you get when you stomp up and down on your cats tail! TRULY AMAZING!!!






THE LONG GRAIN KIT!
This is the RICER-RONI LONG GRAIN KIT! Comes with EVERYTHING you need to convert your SAD little POS into a RICE ROCKET! You may not know what exactly all the parts of this kit would be used for...BUT you are about to find out!






One of the most important mods you can do to your ricer is to add the biggest "fart can" you can find (aka coffee can)! They will enhance the bumble bee sound of your car and is sure to scare the HELL outa the little chumps driving around in their little Camaro SS's and WS6's! They'll just turn and run with their tails between their legs! I dyno'd this one and it gave me an extra 68.4hp and 59 ft/lbs!!! Not too bad huh!?!






Well I’m jumpin ahead a little but I just couldn’t WAIT! This is the one and only MOST important concept that you can perform when converting to a ricer! MISSREPRESENTATION! As you can see I now have the Neck snapping, jaw chattering, raw moped equivalent power of the infamous Honda VTEC!!! Yeah I know, something doesn’t look right…But no one ever accused a RICER of being able to spell right? You might also notice that I unhooked the tube that connects the intake to the air box…I don’t understand why they hook it up like that, it just cuts down on my air flow. You should here this BEAST HOWL w/o that connected!




Here is my next step to making a RICE ROCKET! The High Intensity Discharge (HID) look alike headlights. I chose Pink because I felt it was the most fitting for a car like this (enough said). Now, I chose to use 6 layers to give a more noticeable color…you can customize it to your preference. AND just like NASCAR, you can peal a layer off when it gets dirty...Now I haven’t been able to dyno it yet to see the gains from this alone but I’m roughly guessing it’s some where between 0 and 200hp!





ONTO THE NEXT PAGE...it just keeps gettin better...TRUST ME!